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Kip ur day yob ... e
JackDunphy 1011 reads
posted
1 / 24
Ladies, I need your help with my marketing.

Ladies, thinking about adding the "JDE" to my offerings.

For $1500*, the "Jack Dunphy Experience" can be yours.  

It includes:

*Two full hours of alone time with yours truly
*anything at all you want to eat (off the "dollar menu and more")
*an almost unopened bottle of strawberry Boone's Farm
*free membership to Ashley Madison
*a free box of Godiva's
*day old bread
*a newly washed pair of panties with the word "Skyler" written on the butt
*a chocolate chip mint green pair of "F" me pumps (while supplies last)
*photo board tips to actually make you look hot
*a candle with Mr. Fishers finger prints  
*an open and frank discussion on whether or not your too old to be hooking

 
If you act right now, I will throw in my book, now out in paperback:

"How to Deal with TER Board Assholes, Dicks and Time Wasters: whose negotitations should you shit can and whose should you accept." ;)

*not available in Hawaii, Alaska, and any state that borders on West Virginia.
**OTC starts @ $500 hour. (No boundary pushing please.)

Thoughts?

jelloman42 10 Reviews 237 reads
posted
2 / 24
What do you have against West Virginia?...eom


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balljointnut 23 Reviews 277 reads
posted
3 / 24
What about us guys that want quality time with you?

When we are done do we get a ribbon that says I participated in the JackDunMeExperience? Are those washed panties tighty whites? Has that candle with Fishers fingerprints on it been in his ass or yours? I bought your book "How to Negotiate with Hookers" and all I took away from it was that if you have a penis half the size of a normal man you should whip it out and demand half price because your only half the man they were expecting. Can you clarify?

nothrofboston 24 Reviews 231 reads
posted
4 / 24
Kip ur day yob ... e


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JackDunphy 247 reads
posted
5 / 24
Thank you for your heartfelt response to my query.

Your economy with the English language is only outdone by your amazing interpersonal skills.

Conan will be in touch.

JackDunphy 232 reads
posted
6 / 24
I take back the 47 pm's in the last 3 days complimenting your breasts.

Well...I take back 46 of them. ;)

JackDunphy 270 reads
posted
7 / 24
Yes, that can be arranged. You must first pass muster with my screener.

Paging TS Sasha.

Afro-desiac 230 reads
posted
8 / 24
Where do I sign up!?!?

But is there is discount version?  I mean, I'm 23.  No interest in AM.  Pass on the fast food.  Who's mrfisher?
I'll take the panties for $5.  The Boone's Farm for $3.  Day old bread $2. Godivas?  I'll pass.  Nowhere near the best in fine chocolates.  Baby girl is already the finest chocolate. And what's up with "F me pumps?" Where are we?  Is this a fucking fuck board or not?  Can't you just write fuck?  I'll take the Fuck Me Pumps for $15. Cuz I like green.
I'll take the two hours because I'm sure you'll have me laughing my fine ass off.
For that, I will happily pay you $25.


-- Modified on 1/6/2016 11:23:36 PM

nothrofboston 24 Reviews 206 reads
posted
9 / 24
Fik ya, doot! e


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balljointnut 23 Reviews 262 reads
posted
10 / 24
I'm in but only if TS Sasha wore those washed tighty whites


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JackDunphy 227 reads
posted
11 / 24
The tighty whities will not be an issue with her.

It's what's inside them that will fk with your mind.

JackDunphy 244 reads
posted
12 / 24
Ladies, keep the sales coming!

I have two sales already! Yip fkin heeeeee!

One for the whole truck load of $1500 ( but I have to spoon with Sash) and another for $25.

I am saving up to see Alexandra Hill so do what you can!

JackDunphy 236 reads
posted
13 / 24
Sold!

I do require a $1000 deposit. Will that be Amex, MC or bit coins?

nothrofboston 24 Reviews 204 reads
posted
14 / 24
Lol. e


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ilarasantos See my TER Reviews 203 reads
posted
15 / 24
ROTFLMFAO! (E)


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BigPapasan 3 Reviews 209 reads
posted
16 / 24
Spooning with Sasha - I assume your back will be to her. (E)


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octavia.lexa See my TER Reviews 219 reads
posted
17 / 24
lol this stuff cracked me up


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JackDunphy 227 reads
posted
18 / 24
As Tony Montana said in Scarface when the Feds asked him if he was gay...

No! FUCK no!!!!

JackDunphy 207 reads
posted
19 / 24
Thanks for the green shoe donation.

Based on orders so far, I will need another six dozen.

Fancy8888 See my TER Reviews 235 reads
posted
20 / 24
Re: lol this stuff cracked me up

Crack me up.. Have a good day :)

Posted By: octavia.lexa
Related Link: http://www.preferred411.com/P136493

Squeezetheorem 240 reads
posted
21 / 24
Cancellation policy? Wishlist? Pic?

I'm interested, but need to know your cancellation policy. I'm a very reliable person who most certainly never double books and bails on someone or gets cold feet, but I like to know I won't be fined in the event of an alien abduction.  

Wishlist? I want to spoil you with gifts and a bedside interrogation as to how you got into this, but you offer no specified items and retailers for guidance.  Shall we assume a Snuggie paired with Bartles & Jaymes will set the mood?

No pics? Very shady....Do you have a hatchet wound or something? Or are you perhaps younger than you're letting on and know some of us like older peeps? If it's the latter, it was very slick of you to pepper your convos with  tidbits, such as which Facts of Life girl gave you wood. Answer fast: where were you during Hands Across America?

mrfisher 115 Reviews 222 reads
posted
22 / 24
Place those candles in a brown paper bag and take them to the HIlton....

leave them under the cushions of the first sofa on the left, the one with the pee stain on it.

No questions asked

Afro-desiac 228 reads
posted
23 / 24
How about two of these?


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JoeAFriday 6 Reviews 178 reads
posted
24 / 24
How's this

I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a JDE today ?

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