In the Grand Scheme of things, all else being equal, to which do you give the priority:

Keeping a Promise
Keeping a Secret

Ya, I know, squares and rectangles.

Just Wanna Straw Poll,

Thanks

ML

-- Modified on 6/29/2006 6:13:07 AM

This question is not very different from the age old "which is more important, loyatly or integrity?"

I choose keeping a promise. I have more than a few secrets tucked away that I came into poseession of accidentally or without wanting them. In that respect, I've made no commitment of my own honor to keep them, and if for some reason the better part of valor were to reveal a secret like that, I would choose the honorable route.

Making a promise though, is a commitment on my part to follow through. In breaking that, I have broken my own word, presumably given freely by my own choice. While its true that sometimes a promise must be broken no matter how much we might not want to, my personal belief is that keeping a promise no matter what is the honorable thing to do, and something I always strive to do. Of course, I rarely make promises too.

So I'll take keeping a promise over keeping a secret if I have to choose between the two.

Just my two cents.

Promise to keep a secret

Thank You

How is that for a square peg in a round hole (no pun intended butt go aHEAD and make a  joke anyway)

In this industry its important to keeep secrets first...

Failure to do so can get you into alot of trouble.

Nicely stated, and I can sort of understand the point you make, but I would have to disagree. To me there is no difference between the two.

If someone askes me to keep a secret, I am, in effect, promising them that I will never tell anyone whatever it may be we are talking about.

Mark me in with followme on this one. In my book, they're equal

. . . between loyalty or integrity; frequently having integrity is to be loyal, and keeping a promise is to keep a secret. Perhaps MartinLuther could elaborate on what he meant. If there is indeed a conflict, we just have to decide on a case-by-case basis, with sacrificing integrity.

By the way, I tend to feel that the dichotomy that we encounter frequently is between kindness and justice.

EDIT: Just read Snowblind and followme's posts; I concur.

-- Modified on 6/29/2006 5:50:25 AM

When one receives a 'secret,' with the implicit or explicit (tacit or spoken) agreement to 'keep' said secret, the agreement is simply a promise.  Therefore, there is no real difference in the 'promise' and the 'secret' in your poll.  

A better poll might be, pussy or mouth: in which do you prefer to shoot your load.  Just a thought.  Smokey over and out.

unless I promise to tell someone a secret.

Itr is important to me to be a person of integrity, which entails both keeping promises and secrets.

Like when a jury gives millions to a person who, through their own stupidity, is injured. But of course that money comes from corporations who as we all know aren't owned by anybody, especially not owned by our pension plans. LOL

So then, you're not going to tell anybody where I buried that body, right?

JUST KIDDING!!!

. . . but I was thinking more in the line of giving a quarter to a panhandler.

-- Modified on 6/29/2006 9:39:27 AM

What if a serial murderer is on the lose and in order to catch him you have to reveal your secrets?

I promise to keep a secret!! Swear to God!!

Well said. There is no difference; it is as simple as that.

If three people know something how do they keep it a secret?

Simple. Two people will have to be killed.

a secret is something you only tell one person


at a time

Thanks for all the great input folks...

ML

deserve equal attention. In this business, I'm with CiaraHasFun, it's more important to have the "kept secrets" part. However, a promise to be somewhere is very important, too.

In friendship I must have both, otherwise there is no friendship. The only exception I can think of where a friend would break a promise is if an emergency situation were to come up and she/he feels your life is in danger.

Hugs,
Ciara

-- Modified on 6/29/2006 1:37:15 PM

"Secrets" and "promises" are not specific items that sit on a table to be compared, but the information within these acts should be balanced by intelligence, and an understanding of consequence.

I want to avoid the Apples and Oranges cliche, because others have rightly pointed out that a secret and a promise are often the same thing. But... You can't judge the merits of one over the other without knowing what the secret or promise is. Some are silly, and even harmful by their existence, while some are crucial to someone's life or health. Although secrets more often fall into the former category, and promises the later, it's not safe to predetermine which to choose by a formula (or a poll).

To either break a promise or expose a secret is always a moral delema. My answer to the question is "use best judgement". Given the intelligence to consider the question, most would choose correctly when the need arises.


b

Does your post have anything to do with the front page of today's New York Post?

For me they are both a matter of integrity. Integrity is just being whole and complete. So in this case for me to be whole and complete it also mean honoring your word. It doesnt mean that you keep your word it means that you honor it.

So put it simply if it were a secret that you couldnt keep or a promise that you can't keep then honor your word and say that you cant keep either.

I would not honor a secret of someone being abused or committing a crime where someone was getting hurt. I would not make a promise that I felt would be less than honorable.

So I give my priority to both and would not give my word on either if I couldnt keep them.

...if I promised to keep the secret.