it is rude and inconsiderate of another's time and if it was reversed and i as a provider was over an hour late.....well reviews and blogs would blast me! Perhaps i am overly prompt but a few mintues is one thing but what do you say when some0ne calls and says he will be a LITTLE late, and then calls and says lateRRRR..i would never welllll i just think its really rude to even put me in that position! and NO i am not gonna charge him for that hou rBUT if it was reversed what would man expect??

Oh these poor guys will be so confused now.  I put a blog up on my site a while ago complaining of clients coming early.  I said, "Please do not come early, I need the time all the way up until the scheduled appt to get ready." ( in a nut shell ) For me, coming late is way better than coming early.  But if it was an hour late I would only keep the appointment if I didn't have anyone else that afternoon.  It's never happened to me but I think I have enough to do during a day that if someone is 30 mns late, I figure it's a cancel on their part and I go on with my day.  

-- Modified on 12/9/2007 5:01:42 PM

I agree that everyone should make an effort to be on time. However, traffic in NYC can be a nightmare, and unpredictable. For that reason, I am generally early, leaving with time to spare. Many times I hit a coffee shop to kill time near the incall location, but have still been a little late on rare occasions.
At least he had the courtesy to call, and you had every right to cancel the appointment, if the lateness warranted it.

but it does beat(slightly) NCNS. It is still frustrating and it happens way to often on both sides.

I don't think it is isolated to the hobby. I think we(not me I hope) are just becoming less and less considerate of other people. It's a trend that sucks. Sorry about your day.

...If a guy is running late and it is going to mess up your schedule for the rest of the day. I responded to this on the Boston board as well and lamented about the traffic situation there. Suffice to say, we all know what the traffic patterns are like where we live so I don't really see it as an excuse for being late. We all do it, we know we should give ourselves an extra hour to get someplace but yet we don't and wind up stuck in traffic when we should be knocking on the door of the lady's in call...

I think some times being late cannot be avoided. Recently I was on the way to see a provider and had a single car accident caused by slick roads. I called the provider rather than not show up at all and she acted like she did not believe me. People are late for all kinds of appointments all the time. Some reasons are unavoidable, some are not just people who are late for everything.

People [yes, even providers] can be late for a number of legitimate reasons.  I don't think you have much reason to be upset unless he called you at the very last minute or was significantly later than he said he would be.

In the circumstances you described, I would ask someone to try to estimate how late they would be.  If you have other appointments tell him he will have to see you at another time: later that day if  possible or another date.

Would you prefer that he not call and just show up late without warning?

Scenario: his SO came come home early and he's trying to sneak away. If this isn't an ongoing problem with him... you should give him the benefit of the doubt. Give him a chance to explain the delay. If it becomes a habit or he's just inconsiderate, I wouldn't schedule with him.

-- Modified on 12/9/2007 6:56:42 PM

been late once with traffic that was beyond normal.  Most of the time I stop near the lady's incall and grab a cup of coffee or a soft drink to kill the time.

On the other hand, I have had ladies come to my hotel room over an hour late (babysitter problem, couldn't find a parking place, etc.).  If the lady keeps in touch by phone I can live with it.  Sometimes I don't have the availability to see them because I have a work commitment after the scheduled time for the appointment.

I know how you feel. Last night, I arranged a meeing at LAX with a well reviewed provider. I called from my house (in Los Angeles). Then I called her at the hotel. Both times, she said she would meet me. She never showed. In fact, she never bothered to call me to cancel. I am undecide if I should post a bad review of her. But in your case, I would imagine you black-list guys who waste your time.

You asked what a man would expect if it was reversed. I go by the 30 minute rule, similar to moorepassion. If a provider is not there by 30 minutes after our appointed time, I assume she isn't coming.

Your situation, where the client is in contact with you along the way, is slightly different, but you can choose to handle it the same way. During the first call, it would make sense to say something like "If you're going to be more than X minutes late, let's cancel and try another time. I'd hate for our time together to be rushed."

You can't post a review of something that never happened.

b-

I guess I take it personally more then i should...

Then cancel the turd from your invite list. He and others will get the tune that you won't miss the donation. When he calls for another invitation, read him the riot act. Yes, $hit happens, but thirty minutes later and he still is late, well that is more than an anomaly and would require a very good explanation. If it happens the other way and the lady is rude about it, well I will not darken her door again no matter how good she is...

Post her transgression on your regional board using a "subject" line such as:
'Provider name - provider's TER ID# - NCNS'

In this way the "search messages" feature atop right can create a serendipitous "black list" using the similar characters from any other report(s) the provider may incur.

I'll be honest & it's mentioned in my reviews that I am in general running about 10-15 minutes behind. It is a bad habit but I always call the gent before the date if I can forsee that happening. They are very kind about it. The most I have been late for an appt was an hour one time, I don't remember the details but we changed the time, then there were traffic delays etc.

I have been 20-30 min late before also. I think it is important to call before you get there if running behind & I like to call also at the appt time to say I am 10 min away or whatever it may be.

I would be upset if a client was an hour late or even half hour with no phone call. I had a new guy once booked for incall & he was so sure he knew where he was going, he got lost, but never called just drove around & ended up in WPB which is far from me, lol.

I finally called him like few minutes after our appt was set to be.

I did not have time that day to wait for him to come back.

I always feel bad when I am late & have offered discounts if 30 min late but have yet to have anyone accept.

Then I end up apologizing overly & they are like 'okay not a problem, I'm not upset', lol.

It is a bad habit of mine, I don't leave myself enough time to get ready fully. I also have another reason which is kinda personal but makes me be late sometimes.

Sara

-- Modified on 12/10/2007 7:13:06 AM

-- Modified on 12/10/2007 7:16:26 AM

At one of my doctor's offices, you can wait for hours & they don't update you at all like 'you're next' or even acknowledge the wait ever. He is sooo booked. But lately, has not been so bad. They also don't make change if you pay cash, only give a credit for next time. Seems kinda rude to me.

Sara

Any guy who has seen you knows a little extra anticipation is worth the time.  

BTW - any other guys curious about Sara's "kinda personal" comment?

Being late is one thing and YES, it is annoying but what if he would not have shown up at all?  I learned my lesson in the first two weeks that quality men don't mind sending a deposit and it is the way to go.  SOME men think we do not deserve a call if they are late or an explination if they are a "no show."  They expect us to be sitting, ready to spread like peanut butter with no consideration for out time or feelings....Sad but true in a lot of cases!

I would let him know that you did not appreciate that behavior and it would be easy to overlook had he had a real emergency and called, but that you cannot afford to tolerate BS when you are losing time and money.

Seems very rude to me. I doubt that I would continue to see him. As I get older, I have less and less patience for that kind of treatment.

and something I try to do is get some indication of the area of the incall when setting up the appointment - I understand ladies reluctance to give out incall locations in advance, but you need to be able to give enough info for guys to drive to the location for the call and then get from there to your incall in 5 minutes or less.  Some are very good at this, other try to be vague, but if you are too vague and its a big city, when I call "10 minutes before the scheduled time" I may be in a part of the city that takes 20 minutes to fight thru traffic.  How specific depends upon the city, but for example, in DC, telling someone to call when they get to Georgetown ( a notorious traffic jam at times) can leave them with anywhere from a 2 minute hop to a 45 minute struggle down M street then up Wisconsin, then a hunt for parking.  If possible, i try to get the location of a parking garage, Starbucks, shopping center that is not so specific about their incall location as to endanger them, but allows me to get there, and then when calls are exchanged, make it to their incall (including finding parking if the incall is in an area which has a shortage) within 5 minutes.

That have problems coming on time to places, should probably start their schedule a half hour or an hour from what they usually do.

Some people come on time everwhere while others do not.

The one thing I think he did right was call you about being late, not every person would even do that.

pay with a credit card or carry various denominations of currency.  OR, find a new doctor.  I might have an opening for a new patient.  LOL

Yeah that sucks,

It's not exactly an appointment to close escrow on a house though. I'd think a bit of that comes with the territory, even though it shouldn't. I tell you my standard is 10 minutes early, and I phone and ask them if they need more time. If they do I'll wait till they give the green light and roll through, I think that would be ultimately best.

-m

I know that you think that deposits are the way to goand I know that lateness and NCNS are a major pain in the ass, but I doubt you'll get much traction on the subject around here. I know that I will never, ever send a deposit, not even to a well reviewed provider.

After checking her website, I'm VERY curious about Sara!  She can keep her personal secret though...