I got a text this mourning and this younger lady that I've only seen a few times said she could use some help for paying bills.  Well I live a long ways away from her and told her I couldn't help her.

It kinda pissed me off.  Now im not sure if I wanna see her again, I had already planned on seeing her when I visit her town again.  

She is a fucking cry baby.

After I told her I couldn't help her, she tried to make me feel guilty. But then she says she's excited to see me.

Not sure what Im gonna do now.  

Would you guys see a provider after they hit you up for money?

It is one thing for her to ask for money, but another to play mind games or to make you feel guilty. I would never see her again.

I did see one who had asked for a loan, but her response when I said no made the difference.

I have given money out as a loan against future sessions in the past.

I'd say that half the time things worked out well and I've remained very close to the person and we have a great relationship.

Other times it did not work well and I ended up breaking up.

If you have only seen the person a few times, then she is off base in asking, and I would not bother to see that person again.

The people I have helped out were regulars that I had known for a few years.

That's her hustle - to hit you up for money; as much of it as she can get out of you. The bottom line is king - this isn't a hobby for her. Don't take it personal, you are probably only one of many that she hit up for money at the same time; playing the odds, increasing her chances of finding the chump who will donate. Laying on the guilt trip - that's commitment to the hustle - you never accept the first 'no' as an answer.

You respond in no uncertain terms that you are not the sucker she's looking for, then you go and fuck her again for the standard rate if she is someone worth fucking. Unless of course you're one of those who needs to feel 'genuine affection' or some other such nonsense to get your dick hard, in which case your feelings are probably too hurt by the play she made at you.

The fact that you are pissed off and not feeling guilty suggests you're a bit more pragmatic than that, so if the pussy was good, what's the problem? Use each other - that's textbook P4P.

Oh, I wouldn't be avoiding her because she spoiled the GFE mood, but rather it sounds too much like the behavior of a drug user desperate to score.

I sincerely doubt that you will have any fun on your next visit with her.  You did the right thing by refusing to give her money.  Now it's time to move on.

so it's not like I even know her that well.

Thanks to all who posted.

She has been great in the past meetings with her but nothing mind blowing or anything. So I will probably take the advice here and look somewhere else now.  Plus it might be awkward the next time we meet.

I have and it has paid off greatly.

NO! Another one I told to hit the bricks. Boy was she pissed. LOL

Never had that happen first of all via text,think it was send to all contacts message.Does she give you that dopey vibe keep in mind rent is due today.I think I would stray on this one unless you realy like her was it an above average exprience, and would that request ruin it next time. She could of said I would like to see you it's not like you don't know the extent of your relationship with out implying she want's something.This is your decision to make.

Too many times, we read of guys to expect to work it off...  the sessions do not happen or are crap if they do.  
If you do not expect to get it back, fine.  Then you'd not be disappointed when you don't.

On the other hand, if you want to schedule a session, then give her the correct donation.  I always felt that by doing so, I was keeping us on a pay as you go basis & has worked out well.
skb

Including providers. Sometimes I never heard from them again. But others times the appreciation has never stopped coming back to me. The rewards have been worth as well as the good karma.

Give her what you want to give her, but know your limits and tell her your limits. And if you want something in return, tell her that. Don't count on getting it, but you can be sure you will not get it if you do not ask. For example, paying in advance for a couple of dates at a discounted rate is a very sensible arrangement, except that it may guarantee you never see her again, depending on her ethics. She either may dislike owing you and view getting out of debt as a priority, or she might be interested in working with anyone who will give her money before she takes a free date. Either way, it would be useful to see how she responds.

Do you want to be her sugar daddy? Or her sucker? Or do you just want to do her a good turn? Or maybe you want to walk away? There are perfectly good reasons for all of them (well, maybe one reason for all except the last - the first three will probably make you feel good). My first reflex would be to walk away, but it would depend very much on my opinion of the lady - if I thought this was related to drugs, I would run, not walk, away. If that was not the case, and I liked her, we connected, and particularly if I had some idea of why this happened and what she was doing to get out of this hole (aside from begging), I would be apt to give her some money but with the understanding that if she asked again the answer would be no. That is my style.

I also would be a lot more likely to give her money if she had asked for it as a loan and suggested how she would pay me back. I still might give it as a gift, but having her ask for a gift because of her financial difficulties does not seem like she is taking ownership of the situation.

The risk you run is that you become her sucker, and encourage her to "run into problems" as often as she can, so as to get a little cash to help out. Probably not a pattern you want to set, and it may be one she already has found to work. So, consider whether you want to be her ATM, or set the bar a little higher.

No matter what, a text message seems like a fund raising strategy, not asking a friend for help.

Hope the helps.

Good luck,
Zig

Yeah, I get hit up more often than I like. I've helped some girls out who turned out to be total drug addicts, some others who really needed help and I never heard from again, and yet others (a few on this board, you know who you are) who have always responded with the gratitude and kindness of someone with whom you've shared some intimacy.
So you just never know.

Forget it dude!  Once you start, it'll never stop.  She'll just keep asking until you get sick of giving her dough and then she'll turn it around and make you look like the bad guy.

I wouldn't run to see her in response to her hustle, but the next time you have a taste, sure. Was she a fucking crybaby during the times you were fucking?

Loaning money whether it is in this business or a civilian relationship can always turn sour.One of the top reasons to ruin a good relationship the person loaning the money is trying to be nice and helpful and some will take advantage of that.I would never ask to borrow money from any of my clients I would not care if it is a gentleman that I have seen for years or not but that is me.I would not see a person that asked for a loan and then tries to lay the guilt trip on you.If you had a mind-blowing time with her then that is a decision you will have to make on whether you want to see her again or not but in the back of your mind you  probably will still be thinking of that loan request.

As one provider told me, if you have even half a brain you can make far more money than you need in this business. I have little patience for girls (or guys) that have more dollars than sense.

Won't go into the ugly experience, but the one that worked out I'd do again. As a matter of fact, she didn't even ask. I just gave it to her. We were talking, and she was having a rough time. Asked her what she needed, she told me, and I told her to go to the place and it would be there. She wanted to take it off our next date, but I told her no because she was my friend and I wanted to help.

I had it, she needed it, I sent it. I'd do it again, with her.

About a zillion times around here, and usually with poor results and accompanying horror stories.  This may be the beginning of a slippery slope with her if you give in, so unless you absolutely trust her, probably best to move on.

I have been in this situation twice. The first time was when I was a relative newbie. After our third visit, she began having financial issues and began asking for money with promises of future special rewards for me (threesome, allnighter, etc..). Never happened. Took me a year to recover.

I have another current provider who I have loaned money to. She had promised to repay in cash but I never expected or requested it. The cash never showed up but we have had a few fantastic sessions since. I honestly think much less of her as a person though and will likely not be seeing her in the future.

Im gonna end it, no more seeing her.  I can't believe she even asked me, im sure she has better off clients than me to ask for that shit.

I did not enter the hobby for drama.  

I feel alot better about it after hearing all the responses.  

Thanks

once certain lines have been crossed it takes a little bit out of the sessions. I enjoy fucking someone I actually like than someone I don't.

You are going to tell her no and then explain to her the many reasons why you are saying no.

! you don't know her that well
2. she provides a service
3. you are not a bank
4. she should get a job, work harder etc
5. can she show proof of her hardship and give a good explanation of why?
I bet not...
6. if you do it once. she will ask again and again. why would she work for it if she can get it for free?
7. The list goes on and on..

If you knew her really, really well and were some inkling of her private life and could verify that I would say maybe. but gotta tell ya.. She will never strive to do better, have more etc , If the world keeps handing it to her.................

If you do do it against all of the advice given.  please keep us posted so we can all say. I TOLD YOU SO!

This seems to be somewhat common of younger providers (18-21). Unfortunately I have firsthand experience with this and learned the hard way. I was seeing an 18 year old up until last week. Her daughter's 2nd birthday was coming up on saturday and she asked if I could cover the cost for the party and she would stay a few nights with me in exchange. Well, the party (held at a magic mountain) was a huge success and all the kids had a great time. However, not only did my provider ignore me during the whole thing, she never contacted me to thank me afterwards. She didn't return a message I left the following day either. I guess the young ones are oblivious to how to treat a client in order to keep them coming back.

So my advice with this topic: never pay in advance.

Won't do it again. I would rather give to charities where I can get a tax write off.  There's a saying that goes something like, if you can't afford to give it away don't lend it out in the first place cause chances are you will never get it back. Another saying is, the easiest way to never hear from a person again, loan them money.

Man - that is crossing a line. See someone else.

Based on your post I wouldn't do it though.

I am a provider, and I think that is the most trashy, distasteful, rude, and inappropriate thing.

Period