Just read something that got me thinking. How has this lifestyle changed you? Going from a newbie, to less than newbie I have definetly noticed a change in myself. Thought I was just getting comfortable,  and confident in myself.
  I have gone from a super shy guy who couldn't get hard because he was so nervous to a hobbyist who is looking to set up a doubble. This dramatic change happened in less than 1year. A good friend of mine got me thinking maybe it's not such a good thing. She liked the shy guy. I could use some advice...
I'm particularly reaching out to experienced hobbyist,  but Providers point of veiw is always welcome.

I have a guy who is slowly changing into the type I can't deal with...he I guess is gaining confidence, and I support and applaud that. However his style is changing...he is starting to become the type of guy I don't like...one that treats me like a fuckdoll. To some ladies that's fine but it makes me feel less than human and I hate it! He used to be so sweet and cute and now he is starting to act like some guy in a porn movie. Again, to some that is great and if that's how he now wants to be, also great, but not with me. He can find someone else.

Some change is good and others, not so much. A guy can change into whatever he wants, however, just like ladies who get enhanced boobs, they run the risk of not being seen by someone who used to like it the way it was.

helped me focus on my career, prevented the marriage, and overall made me a very HAPPY person

Marriage has destroyed two of my friends. They are pathetic..They hate their wives, and their career is going backwards. This is only less than 5 yrs after their marriage.

I am more of a loner anyway. Sometimes, I do feel that a girlfriend or a wife would be nice for companionship, But for the most part, I am just happy reading a book or browsing the web, or going to ball games all by myself. I am not really afraid of getting old or dying alone in a nursing home.

Also, I can't find myself to be happy with someone else - especially if she didn't share my passion for sports



-- Modified on 8/13/2012 12:33:20 PM

(with my best beavis & butthead impression) hehehe,hehe,yeah,hehe ,fuckdoll, fuckdolls are kewl,hehe,yeah like, take ur money, now make the noises daddy taught ya, hehe , hold still, your pigtails are turn signals , left turn clyde , , ,

"Hey bitch-boy, why do you treat me like that..Next time you walk in with that attitude, I will beat you to pulp with my baseball bat."

See how he reacts

and speaking as one of the most jaded ones here, at times I wish I could get as excited about small things as I once could.

Of course with experience comes the confidence in knowing no one is likely to dupe you,

I guess I don't really have any real advice, just some related ramblings on the subject from a very experienced (and presently very hung over) whore monger.

Hi Saturn,

The only thing that has changed in me is that my self confidence has risen to lofty levels!! I have to thank the wonderful ladies in this hobby for helping me in that dept!! I still treat the women that I see w/ the same respect that I did during my first encounter!!

Everyone thinks of wealth in a financial way when speaking of a provider but there are so many other aspects of my life that have been enriched.

The biggest is the bounty of friends I have gained who have become my sounding board to my future. Takes a gentleman a few times to see you before they open up and give you the real tips to your happiness. We do learn from others mistakes and unhappy times but even more from their successes. Clearly helping others sort through their trial times teaches us much and gives us the basics to do rational thinking ourselves.

I have always wondered what I would do without a man around to cuddle with, kiss and of course enjoy sensual foreplay with. We all know not just men are unhappy in their own private relationships, women themselves complain about lack of attention in their lives too.  Never a dull moment with my lifestyle that has opened me to a world of play I would have never experienced. Plenty of men who love to please me even as an over 45 provider.

Now for the financial freedom to cum and go. I make my own hours and limit myself to who I choose to see and when. No time clock to worry about and days off are to my choosing. This has allowed me to help when family members were sick and need help with their everyday care. I am able to pickup my toys , put them away and go on with my personal life for as long as needing tending . Getting back in the swing of things is pretty simple and if you treat your friends right and keep communication open your busy the day you put the open sign back on your door.

Kisses Haley

Hi Curly,

Now I need to make more money, because I'm missing out on the bevy of beauties that are coming through town!! :oD

LOL....I can't talk to him like that...

However, I will have a chat, we get along great and this is the only change that I have noticed. It does happen and it's a shame, however if this is his new path, I will wish him well, but no longer see him. We all deserve to do what makes us happy. No hard feeling if it comes to that though.

at 15 cuz theyd get me front row seats at bobby dylan , in the dj booth at all big clubs on landsdown.I was barely out middle school n was in dj booth at biggest clubs every night drinkn n hangn with the big dogs.   n beer n we d drive thier in nice cars.  I didnt quite realize then what I was  doing was escorting but I knew I could get exactly what I desired . Especially if I brought my best friend from puerto rico n we  d shpwer n make out in fornt them. we got whatever we deisred n went any where we wanted.  I also was naturally a very horny girl and well was enjoying myself. I used to make this one guy jerk off for me in his car before he dropped me off. i loved watching it, i d masterbate. i was really sexually advanced.  . he was more than twice my age cute wore cowboyboots n gel in hair, showed me every good margarita bar in Boston while other girls were home in bed I was out at all bostons top night clubs n restauraunts becomign a conasuir{sorry bad spelling" of best margaritas in town, and more. I havent changed cuz it I just call it comething different now instead of being a horny slut I am considered  an escort.  and now instead of partying I am always looking for new fitness equipment or what to do next to my apt to make it look better. I still love men and they love my slutty horny side and take care me . I didnt know this was called or was a business then I do now . I understand mens need for some entertainment and fun and wildness. I javent changed in 16 years. i just got sick of clubs n bars I guess n now like staying in I still get speechless and dumbfounded with the excitement n thrill of a new client walking in the door. I am glad for this n hope i dont ever grow accostomed to it, Again new client comes yesterday i was uptight for first 45 min, I was so nervous when he arrived n excited. He was 41 very handsome. I couldnt believ how talented he was orally it was unreal. Probly he d be in my MY top ten. for oral skills, . Then like all sudden last 20 min I am swearin  telln him what a bad naughty boy he is for wantn to go fuck all the dirty lil prostitutes. and does he like my pussy all over him ect ect. After he was like wow you have a mouth on you! n said he could tell i was nervous at first when he got there n then was like shocked when all that nasty talk picked up. Any ways. sp in a butshell here. i havent changed. I have always loved getting into these explicite leassions with guys that will be generous with me, I just didnt have a web site then , i been doing the same thing though it just i meet them thru internet now not by goin to landsdown street on school nights in marias mothers clothes n make up! they didnt card any where 16 years ago not for bars clubs cigarettes! I d buy cugareetes with my lunch money every day when i was 11. . and the clubs would pick the hottest ladies out a the lines n youd get to cut every one n gp in, its so pilgrim annoying stupid npw, poor kids r so dam suppressed they r all on dam heroine now , forget bout drinkn in clubs they cant get in, so they r all a mess w opiates npw is apparently the rage with kids in 15 age group around the bean. too bad they shou;d let up on drinkn laws maybe theyl go back to bein lushes, like good old days, . just glad i aint 15 now in thsi concrete jungle poor kids, i look at my little cousins n how young they r n what they seen n they do, Its reallyt amess out there in boston, .

The human eye is not made to read a two hundred word, solid block of text.

I barely got through the first two sentence before giving up, please spend some of the escort money you are making and take a remedial writing class. You, and everyone that has to read what you write will thank you for it.

Hi GA,

.. that a woman does & I don't  need Levitra!!

Stop drinking, gambling and mongering then...

I went through half of it and then lost patience. Beat you hands down Gambler...

I have never been at a loss for words  or less than too confident .  Once I started  hobbying I cut back drastically on cheating on a GF with another civvie .
The way I look at it , cheating with a provider is not as bad towards my GF or the object of my affair, as cheating with someone who might be  attracted to me and could  want more than a fling .
I did notice  a  few years ago when a live in GF flew the coop , I was lackadaisical in my attempt to find another steady GF , for much longer than usual . Likely had something to do with my ten sessions a month with providers after she left .

 
 
 

Congratulations on your superior pain tolerance, or much younger eyes than mine. lol

Yeah !!! It was painful alright. ! [e]

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 1:57:03 PM

If you are like me, I can remember a time, in the distant past, when I knew people could spell words and punctuate much better than I. I get the distinct impression she has never had such an occurance. Nonetheless, ...

Nah that's all I got.

Maybe she reads the phone book very sexily, however!

medical condition that affects her ability to type...would hate for anyone of us  to have to be in those shoes one day. I am sure the constant mocking has made an impression on her, but she might not give a fk about what people on a hooker board think, nor do I.

I love calling out fked up grammar and spelling just as much as the next person, but she gets a pass because I know her history. She talks just fine btw.

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 4:32:00 PM

It did seem weird because she made a good point...

I heard you have a river running through your house! Not as wealthy is still wealthy..
Rich bastard!! You don't count.

The question is, which one of you, the new you, or the shy you, you like better? Then go with it and don't put it for a vote.

Either way, it sounds like what you want is different than what you wanted when you started. That seems pretty normal to me. Now you have a choice. Either continue with your good friend or not. If you continue with your old friend, she is making it pretty clear that what she has been doing with you is what she is willing to do, nothing more. Don't fight that, because you will never win. She might move a little out of her comfort zone for a while, to please you, but if she is not enjoying it you are just becoming that demanding, problem client.

Look for those other things elsewhere. Once you find them, and particularly once you find a lady you like who is willing, eager and able to go on whatever journey you are taking, you will have to decide whether or not it makes sense to continue with that old friend. For me, that was easy - both my original regulars had BF issues that resulted in them becoming unavailable for a bit, and/or changing how they worked. So I got dumped. When they came back, I was annoyed and it was never the same. It made me miserable, but allowed me to freely move on. Today, the ladies I see, what we do, how we meet, how often we meet, hell just about everything is different from what it was. I am pretty sure this would have happened in any case, but the way it worked for me made it easier, maybe even accelerated the change.

In my case, I would describe myself as looking for a more sexually adventurous and intimate experience. My regulars (and I rarely see new ladies these days) are quirky, strong, smart and enchanting. They speak their minds, rather than pretending to be passive, romantic lovers. And they often take me to places, socially, sexually and in conversation, that I was not looking to go. I guess I like to be challenged. They are also open, sometimes eager, to try new things I want to try. Of course, they still have their limits, too, but they are adventurous.

If you are seeing a lady who likes to do the same GFE routine, and is not disposed to do anything different, she is not going to change with you. So long as you enjoy it, stick with it, but pursue your new interests elsewhere.

zig

Are you telling me that it is strictly a physical disability? I'm sorry, but I assume that if you can hit that many keys on a keyboard, you can start a new paragraph. And I assume that if you know that typing isn't one of your fortes, then you should concentrate on your selling points, which, judging by her reviews, she has. And why does "stupid" and people who pick on "stupid" demonstrate any lessor degree of mocking or bullying? It's the same thing.

So do you think it is possible for a guy to gain this type of confidence without changing his "Style"?
  I mean.. Can I go out and have a PSE Double.. Kinky, and raunchy..
Then next week meet a Courtesan, and hang out GFE style? Why not?
Also civie dates come into play.  That is a whole new thread.
  Will I always be tainted? I don't know... I doubt it. I don't feel tainted now.
This is the question no one wants to touch. It is a little personal I must admit.
Reminds me of a movie called Green Card.

If she can't write in paragraphs, she needs to express shorter thoughts that can be read by the average person. I honestly could not, and will not read a post that gives me a headache like the one she just wrote.

Either she needs to get help as I suggested, or as a courtesy to others she needs to figure out a way to communicate her thoughts in shorter bursts, ones that can be read in a single paragraph.

Call me an insensitive asshole if you must, but we aren't doing her any favors by tiptoeing around her feeling, yet not reading her posts because they are unreadable. Most people with handicaps don't want to be coddled, she is capable of figuring out a way for her readers to understand her, and it's incumbent on her to figure out how to do so, not on us to painfully attempt to read through a solid block of text.

It is obvious to me that you have never worked with,  or helped people with any handicap.
Everything you said is true, but you look like an idiot because you make conclusions...
She wants to be heard. She has an idea, and types it in. Thats all.
I got her point. She had a good one.
Maybe you guys just can't figure out what she meant. IMO.. That makes you stupid...

You're fine.

That's my take on it.

Where a guy goes from say what I prefer and I don't see him for a year and he has been around and comes back all wanting to re-enact the last porno he has seen. Yeah, not my thing and if that's his new way of wanting it, count me out.

As far as changing it up every now and then, no problem, it's your choice, however, make sure you do it with the appropriate lady or ask your atf if she's up for a bit of kink.

And I do think the bolster in confidence can be separate from his style.

What is this question no one wants to touch...those are the ones I don't mind touching so ask away.

Then started all over again. Not knowing her issue, I am saying this with all due respect and am not making fun of her.

Rarely can one person give you everything..and I encourage my guys to seek the kinkier things elsewhere. We have what we have and that's awesome but I do know my limits. And I want them to experience things are cannot provide. I want to keep our relationship healthy and that means I don't want to feel any resentment because I am doing things that are not "me". That never turns out well.

If she can figure out how to string together a hundred related words, she can figure out how to make those hundred words readable to the average person.

If she is ever going to have a  'real" voice here, and ever been taken seriously, she is going to have to figure this out.

Being able to communicate via the written word is a huge skill set in the modern world and quite frankly has always been a skill I have struggled with (believe it or not from the board former biggest blabbermouth) We aren't doing her any favors by allowing her to skate on this. Quite the contrary, most people here in the interest of being PC and not hurting her feelings will simply ignore her posts and she won't ever become a real member of this community.

Call it tough love if you like, but someone has to say it, and making excuses for her isn't what she needs.

If she were indeed stupid, that would be one thing, but LR claims from personal knowledge that isn't the case, so she needs to overcome this medical challenge, for her own good not ours.

themselves...that's why. FYI, her joints in her fingers do their own thing...look it up. I don't know if she is using her phone or a puter, but she has always been trashed for this. It's funny no one has ever called her fat though. No worries Macy, there is plenty of stupid around here to keep my ass busy without fking with Angel who is truly a decent person.

Sadly, I don't read her posts anymore but only because I have a rather short attention span.

You were not around for the months she was posting and had gotten a little better at keeping it short, but she was trying. I agree that she may not appeal to certain members, and I am sure she does too. What should we do..have her banned until she can write? I am just saying, the girl is not going anywhere so it's obvious she does not give a fk what anyone here thinks about her.

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 8:19:03 PM

been said a dozen times by everyone here. She is NOT taking the advice, so leave her be. Hell, most people skip my posts too and I can write! I don't give a fk, and she probably does not either.

engaging in P4P, having numerous threesomes, and even foursomes, having had sex with literally thousands of women has not prevented me from dating civvies, getting married, being exclusive to one woman without a moments regret. etc.

In short, unless you let it and become a slave to your inner urges. There is no reason to fear that you will become tainted and unable to connect with a real person, or enjoy a moment of true tenderness.

If an asshole like me can keep his humanity, you have nothing to worry about.

Now please forget I ever said that this, and this message will self destruct in 30 seconds. Hey, I have a reputation to uphold. lol

Dear Ms. Rayne:
Would you say that you like your copulatory activities extremely primal? Would the sex that you like transpire on a city street behind a dumpster at 2:30 in the morning with you saying stick me like a thief in the night as you are being entered from behind and he is pulling your hair simultaneously? Just wanted to get an exact essence when you said treat me like a whore.

This was good advice for her own good, served up without the least bit of sarcasm.

Unless she also has a reading disorder, she needs to go back and edit each post she makes until they are readable to the average poster if she ever wants to be taken seriously here. Making excuses for her won't help her. If she can't do in on her own she needs to get help, not just for TER, but being able to write is a skill that is essential to get by in the REAL world.

Just like with the spoken word,  a person who speaks "ghetto" will never get the respect that someone commands who speaks properly, the same goes for the written word, until she can write effectively, she will always be considered less intelligent than someone who can.

Who is doing her the bigger disservice, you by coddling and then ignoring her, or me by bringing this to her attention in a rather clear and  direct manner?

With your approach, she will think what she does is acceptable and will make no effort to change, With mine, after first calling me an asshole (a charge I can live with) perhaps, just perhaps she will realize I am right and get the help she needs.

I was only trying to get the essence of what you meant by treat me like a whore and I used those examples as a case in point.

So I give her much credit.

Think of her as our own version of James Joyce.

Also, despite the difficulty of reading her posts, the content is very much well worth it.

Neither money or time are an issue right now, but you can only fuck so much.

I need to get home before I drink and fuck myself to death.

Hi GA,

... a Cracker Jack box does not count as real!! So, before you comment on a person's disability & what they should do! You need to study up on the affliction, or better yet, walk a mile in their shoes!! Many disabilities  affect a person in different ways!!  I speak from experience, so....

Look what up, exactly? Sweety, I don't post as much as you do, but I read quite a bit. I know we both have some civvie life similarities. I am technically a double amputee, and have some other medical issues, a handicapped brother, and a number of boyfriends suffering from priapism.

If people say I am fat, or they say my reconstruction freaks them out, or they say whatever, it might be true, and I can take some constructive criticism, whether or not the issue can be rectified. It's perfectly okay to be imperfect. In fact, I personally find "real" individuals to be more attractive. But if you can't type, I dunno, maybe she can look into some software to better help her express her thoughts, if her feelings are hurt or she feels there is an obstacle holding her back. I have faith that that's what you would do.

Posted By: London Rayne

themselves...that's why. FYI, her joints in her fingers do their own thing...look it up. I don't know if she is using her phone or a puter, but she has always been trashed for this. It's funny no one has ever called her fat though. No worries Macy, there is plenty of stupid around here to keep my ass busy without fking with Angel who is truly a decent person.

Posted By: MacyMadison

Are you telling me that it is strictly a physical disability? I'm sorry, but I assume that if you can hit that many keys on a keyboard, you can start a new paragraph. And I assume that if you know that typing isn't one of your fortes, then you should concentrate on your selling points, which, judging by her reviews, she has. And why does "stupid" and people who pick on "stupid" demonstrate any lessor degree of mocking or bullying? It's the same thing.

Posted By: London Rayne

medical condition that affects her ability to type...would hate for anyone of us  to have to be in those shoes one day. I am sure the constant mocking has made an impression on her, but she might not give a fk about what people on a hooker board think, nor do I.

I love calling out fked up grammar and spelling just as much as the next person, but she gets a pass because I know her history. She talks just fine btw.

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 4:32:00 PM

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 7:57:44 PM

Which one is it. If she in fact cannot help herself (something I doubt quite seriously) that's one thing, if on the other hand she is just too lazy to change, that's quite another.

In the meantime LR is getting people to apologize to her for something that she has the power to fix. That type of enabling does no one any good,

In the meantime I will just ignore any of her illegible posts or make fun of them, depending on my mood, If as mrfisher has stated, her posts have improved then she is capable of improving so the only reason for her posts to be illegible is laziness.

Honestly. You must have a story that can relate to the moment you turned from...
Newbie into Hobbyist

No...you definitely don't want to become him.  And in that regard I was suggesting to avoid the drugs.  Hell, look at what he's turned into  LOL

And there really isn't a story per se, it's been an interesting journey that has taken twists and turns that I never ever expected.  And for the most part in a good way

When did you define yourself?
Everyone seems to be very good at avoiding the question.

You need to make up her mind, either she has a serious medical problem which makes it "impossible" for her to write intelligibly OR she just isn't taking our advice. You can't have it both ways.

Make up your mind, and I'll quit annoying you, on this subject at least, I am sure I can find something else to annoy you about once we've moved past this subject. lol

It is not predictable in how it takes action, or how each the symptoms affect each person. It's almost like having no control over your joints when you try to type, eat, drink, etc. Don't get me wrong...I am just as imperfect as the next, which is why I fail to see the humor in making fun of people who are disabled, their race, weight, etc. When I said making fun of stupid people, I did not correlate that with true ignorance either, but people who are all out a holes.

I am assuming you did not know about this nor did any of the others who posted, but to say she "should" or "could" do this and that, is a bit much. Maybe she simply does not want to worry about her typing skills on a damn fk board. It's not like she is amongst scholars in any event. Then again, it's the internet and we can all pretend to be greater than the next person I guess.

if her joints simply allowed her to have more control over her hands that day...see what I am saying? She could be typing fine, then the crap goes crazy and she is all over the place. Yes, I get she could hit cancel when that happens, but damn...she has a good heart unlike a lot of other jackwads around here who CAN type. I am not "making" anyone do anything...I don't have a string on anyone's mouth to "make" them say they are sorry..that's called a fkin conscience.

I think someone took over my body and my handle..no clue where all this compassion is coming from today. Meh.

-- Modified on 8/13/2012 10:24:53 PM

You know darn straight you wouldn't be standing up for a guy. And by that token, we as women often post on fk boards with the knowledge that any number of readers are sexist, or assume we are hookers because we have no options. Some do and some don't [have many]. But, I think you know that you are sometimes exponentially irked when a woman posts and she is doing so with a degree of ignorance.

And as far as fibromyalgia, it is often misdiagnosed, generally doesn't involve local pain, is often to be misunderstood for other psychological illness, and I find it hard to believe that a disability as you are describing it, can affect basic functions yet not her ability to garner pretty awesome review$. I see some disconnect there.

You're a nice girl, though, and I like you. But, even a top poster can pick their battles, lol. She has already demonstrated that she is not at a loss for words.

Maybe this is what you were alluding to.

well its slim pickins for underage ho s now that ted kennedy is gettin it from satan
but bravo , what a resume , too bad the cigar club aint open in the oval office , but michelle obamma might seek your expertise in handling vegetables

one can use the hunt-and-peck system. Yes, it takes longer, but it's still do-able. Which means she can take the time to at least hit return now and then, fk board or not.

You are obviously on your game.
You have not answered my question though...
Very good at looking cool though,, Ill give you that......
I am looking forward to your witty quip.

and this disease affects each person differently. I don't really propose to know what she is or is not capable of, so I won't comment on what I feel another person suffering with something I don't have, should be doing. I will just say, I won't make fun of her but please be my guest.

Macy, are you kidding? I have dogged out guys all the damn time for being ignorant and lacking the common sense it takes to use proper grammar, BUT they are not suffering from an ailment either. I post in the name of fairness and common sense, not to say what I think the boys want to hear to get business...obviously lol. I have also taken up for YOU when you were being dogged for your various videos, so I just happen to think Angel is a good person..that's it.

FYI, she does not need her hands to suck and fk lol. I sure as hell don't, though I tend to use them ha ha.



-- Modified on 8/14/2012 12:16:00 AM

A person with so much experience should have no trouble.....
                             We want to know?!?!
You could tell us.... We won't tell....

but if you are asking how the hobby has changed me, or if I am different now than when I first started P4P, that's not really a fair question in my case. As I stated earlier, I started P4P at the ripe old age of 15, of course I am different now, but it's impossible to tie any of the changes in MY life to the hobby as it's always been always been exposed to it, as opposed to someone who discovered it in their middle age.

I hope that answers your question, or at least explains why I can't answer it.

If there is another question that i am missing, please ask me again, and I'll be more than happy to respond.

I agree, the rest of the responses here are highly doucherious!

Your "friend" may be a natural casualty.  Go with it.  Look at the rampant hijacks of your OP.  perfect examples of people that don't even comprehend what your asking, let alone allow for it.

you have developed are only social skills that benefit you when you know money is on the table. Many guys here are under the delusion that paying for sex improves their confidence in the real world, and that is simply not true. In the real world, a woman will still treat you like crap, turn you down, and laugh at you just because.

This business tends to create a faux sense of security, which really does not exist. You can buy sex, but you can't buy love and friendship so the friends you have made here would have been your friends even if there was no donation.

Confidence is attractive...that I will say My ex had so much of it, that he went from a 6 to a 10 in less than a year, but I realzed it was also bs. He was the most insecure man on the planet and his actions confirmed it. All in all, if this business has helped you find your sense of self, great, but don't think you need to pay for sex to achieve those same results. There are many other ways to find inner strength and confidence, and none of them have anything to do with strange sex from women you pay.



-- Modified on 8/14/2012 11:57:10 AM

You did. I missed it. The thread got too big.
Seriously .. Thanks for the honesty.
You are one of the few who has the guts to answer a serious question.

NOBODY accuses me of having no guts. lmao

when I go out on a civvy date, I don't obsess over whether or not I am going to get laid that night, or ever for that matter, like the typical guy who is humping her leg before the appetizer arrives.

I know that I can get laid any time, any where, with very little effort on my part, just pay a few hundred bucks and my urge is satisfied. I am amazed how much more success I have with women by simply being myself and not "trying too hard"

Of course that's just my experience, I could be wrong. lol

Being able to PAY for sex, does not mean you're any better of a man to a girl in the real world...it just means you have a ton of women willing to take your money to fk them. Being able to fk young, hot women here does not mean you can do it for free in the real world...not you personally, but you get my drift.

It is a faux sense of self to actually believe that what women tell you here is the actual truth..cmon, you know the game. Building up a man's sexual ego and allowing him to gain sexual skill is only one part of what true inner confidence consists of..a very SMALL part. A guy can be Don Juan in bed, but if he can't talk without his knees shaking, he is never going to get a girl INTO bed.

I might add that "being a slave to p*ssy" is irrelevant and has nothing to do with confidence..that is more what I could consider being codependent, and that is a mind issue not a libido one. If all you think about and meditate on is your next lay, you're no different than a drug addict or an alcoholic. Being a slave to anything has nothing to do with confidence, and everything to do with control or a lack thereof...not the same things. If your mind is right, it is balanced in every area including your vices. Now..tell me I am not right motha fuka lol.



-- Modified on 8/14/2012 12:07:16 PM

talking to a woman "with your knees shaking" comes from caring too much about the pussy, and coming across as desperate.

When a man is getting laid on a regular basis, he quits having to "try so hard" to get laid. because quite frankly he/I doesn't care. So many women are accustomed to men falling all over themselves trying to get into their pants that they find it refreshing, or even sexy that a man doesn't try so hard.

You take any guy and deprive him of pussy for a couple of months and he too is going to "lose his game" because he'll be so damned horny, he'll forget he ever had any game, and nothing is less sexy than desperation.

Someone like me OTOH can go on a date, have a good time, settle for a peck on the cheek and then call a provider and fuck my brains out. No pressure, no desperation, and I come out looking a hell of a lot better than the guy humping her leg from the first five minutes.

No, the hobby has not made me Don Juan, but I certainly don't give off a desperate vibe.Hell, I've even learned how to say NO to women I don't find attractive, now that is a skill not easily learned for the average, non rock star,non pro athlete kind of guy.

Too many women truly believe that every guy is going to fall all over themselves for pussy.

And trying to get most gals to have any real clue as to how some of the guys see this is not going to happen.  To take away one of those "great mysteries" and ask a gal to deliver something interesting besides tits and ass puts many of them in a VERY uncomfortable position.

It's not all that hard to decipher even on this board as to which types of guys enjoy gals that are smart and confident.  And wouldn't at all mind just chatting with them.

And the gals who only have tits and ass to sell make sure that WE know that those gals aren't all that and then some...hilarious at times.

So the guy can now get laid..BFD. He is also PAYING to get laid. It teaches him nothing about social skills outside of the bedroom, other than in the back of his mind he can go fk a hooker later on. It's not about sex. Just because you can pay a hooker to fk you, does not mean you are going to have the same confidence go out and get that job you've been dreaming about. I won't sit here and argue about what gives YOU confidence, because that would be stupid. I will say, you don't speak for most men I know outside of this world. Their faith, family, and accomplishments are what give them confidence, not paying whores lol.

-- Modified on 8/14/2012 2:27:16 PM

Most of the banter discussing confidence seems to revolve around how a guy handles himself around women.  Heck, the OP started the thread asking about at what point did a guy actually realize he is a veteran hobbyist.

What you're trying to differentiate here is how a person handles themselves in life overall.  I will say that many of the fellas I have met here and chat with are quite confident in their lives, and always have been.  But that is a small sample set to illustrate how "most" men (or women) see themselves.

Confidence is an attribute that is built from experiences.  Using the P4P as an additional experience that may give some fellas an extra bit of confidence is just that, and nothing more.  Will P4P propel a guy to ultimate success?  That can only be answered by each individual.  But if another element of perceived success gives a guy that additional confidence to land a job, land a civvy gal, earn a raise...not a problem from where I am sitting.

Just remember, men see things much differently than women see them.  At least in my experience.  And the constant reminder of that concept is written all over these boards  LOL

in relation to how guys interact with women they can't pay to get their way with. It might make them not so worried about getting a nut, but it teaches them nothing about how to interact in general. You can't compare an experience that is bs to one that is real...that's what I am trying to point out. Hookers you pay will always be nice to you, tell you how great you are, and kiss your ass...well ok, not me but you know what I'm saying ha ha.

I simply don't see how any man can take what happens here, and think it's real or would be without an envelope. Maybe you guys see things differently, but I highly doubt most men here need us to give them arrogance or confidence...your ass certainly doesen't bwahahaha.

Lots of guys are shy around women. I'm guessing for many reasons like ... the fear of rejection, fear of acting like an idiot, just general inexperience.

Now I agree with you that guaranteed success from dealing with escorts in no way means you'll have success in dealing with civvy women ... but that's not the point. A guy who was too scared to even approach women before can learn that spending time with a beautiful woman really isn't that big a deal and there is nothing to be scared of from one.

Sure, there are plenty of us who have never had this problem, but I know plenty of men too scared to walk up to a lady in a bar and start a conversation. Seeing escorts can help give a guy enough confidence to at least talk to a woman now in a situation like this, and we all know you can't win if you don't even try.

At great risk I will insert my .04 cents. Fibromyalgia is a B.S. diagnosis and a B.S. "disease". There is no such thing and most competent M.D.s that aren't in the pocket of a pharma would never diagnose anyone with that. They would refer their patient to a psychologist because the patient needs cranial care and not medicine. Fire away....

JC

the girl is suffering from something that causes her to have such swelling, and that is the closest thing to it. I don't care if you call it man hands, but she is in fact in agony! Peace the fk out!

I don't HAVE to pay for sex, I can get as much pussy for free as any other non rock star, fifty something year old guy.

What I can't get for free is a dozen different hotties in a week, that's what the hobby is for.

What the hobby does for ME is takes all the sexual tension out of my civvie dates because I honestly don't care that much whether or not they lead to sex. Often times they do, other times they don't. If I weren't getting all the pussy I could ever handle through the hobby, I might start chasing a lot of these civvy women who think their pussy is made of gold. Quite frankly, I don't give a fuck, and it often leaves them wondering what the fuck is wrong with them when I don't kiss their ass.

somehow I doubt you are ever going to grasp my point, but it seems like most everyone else here has. My main point is guy who get laid on a regular basis don't have to kiss ass, and women respect a man with a backbone, and no woman respects a mangina, in or out of the hobby.

oh , then , my english not so good, i meant to ask if i could fit this glass slipper on ur foot

talking about 2 different things,. You, about using hookers to take the sexual tension out of civvie dating so you're not so desperate (kissing ass) to get laid and London is talking about the false sense of confidence (hooker tell you what you want to hear, not necessarily the truth) hobbying can give a guy. I see it as two different things that are slimly related...being that hobbying is the common denominator.

A man should not grow his confidence or sum up his self worth by seeing escorts. While there are many kind ladies in the adult business, there are also "professionals". Men are not paying a women to be genuine. While some of us are genuine, there are many who are just doing their job. If a man is hoping to become a better lover, then I guess practice does make perfect. But gaining a sense of security and confidence is vain in this way. The confidence building should be out in the real world, where women are allowed to voice their opinions, protest, argue, and be as pissy as they please. Confront a women in a normal setting, in all her quirks and personality traits... Then feel confident around her. That is the real deal.

Having sex with lots of women is not growing in confidence, its growing in ego or sexual skills, or just growing in notches on the belt and memories.

I know Hound and did meet him when he was a newby. I've never thought of him as shy. He walked in very confident and jolly. I felt so lucky to have a breath of fresh air come into my apartment. I genuinely liked who he was. I don't see where this lack of confidence would come from. I never saw it. What I saw was a sweet affectionate kind person. And I warned him that the hobby can be bad for a person's soul if they are not careful. And from there, he progressed into a frequent poster and hobbyist. And seems to be happy. He is a man who wants to play. You doesn't want anything serious or monotonous. Someone who is like most men here, and wants to taste as much sexual delicacies as possible.

But he never needed any of this to make himself feel confident. Every compliment I ever gave him was genuine. Whatever he decides, I will wish for him always true happiness and protection from any harm

-- Modified on 8/15/2012 10:56:47 PM