I thought the 'hobby' was about NSA sex.  If that is not what you are looking for, why are you a provider?  Or are you a provider that just wants to see inexperienced clients?  I really don't understand your thinking.

Swim

What's so hard to understand about something so simple?

Understanding why someone would be so hypocritical, now that's a different story. lmao

Up until now, I didn't realize that there was a female version of a mangina. A hooker that only wants to fuck guys that make her feel "special", Now I have heard everything. lol

This is what works for HER.  If she is in business it must work or she would be out of work.

I don't share her approach but do understand where she is coming from.  My personal preference is experienced patron with established references but at the same time not someone who is trying to sport-fuck through entire TER contingent.

There are a lot of gentlemen who do partake in this lifestyle on regular basis, are members of various boards but would never post on boards or write reviews.  They are usually very easy to screen since they have impeccable references and know how to introduce themselves.



Lina

For the ladies, please.

Over the course of the last several days, during an email exchange I was having with a provider acquaintance, I came to understand that she regarded online references with differing degrees of significance,  That is to say, there was one type of online reference she felt carried more weight or more meaning somehow than the others.  I don't want to lead the discussion so I won't say which one or why.

I think it might be interesting to hear from the ladies, between these 3 types of references - the DATE-CHECK Reference, the Preferred411 Provider Okay, and the TER White List, do you feel that any one of these is more meaningful than the others, or do they have pretty much the same meaning to you?  If you think one is more meaningful or significant than the others, why?

they all indicate a casual approach to all this, and an active involvement in seeing multiple providers for the purposes of NSA sex only...basically, it indicates a "hobbyist." exactly the type of man i DON'T want to meet (and who doesn't want to meet me either, btw).

Thanks for hitting the basic questions - all the same.

So for you, the better reviewed a potential client is, the less interested you are in seeing him?  So if he has an active history shown in online references, that indicates a casualness somehow?  From a provider perspective, you're not interested in clients who are interested in NSA sex?

Thanks for participating!

For me it is very important for a guy to have at least one of those...Now with that said, me being the paranoid person that I am....even if a guy is DC verified, but lets say he only has 1 provider ref and I've never even heard of her, I won't see him....Same with P411, if you don't have any OK's or just a couple and the ones you have are a bit dodgy...I wont see you....It really takes multiple OK's from reputable providers for me to feel safe...just my .02

Ladies?  All online references equal, or are some more equal than others?

but as far as myself, I would rather see a client that has several providers under his belt. Means he isn't LE, he isn't an ax murderer, and all the better if he is white-listed by someone from TER. I have seen several clients that do not have anything to do with TER, but they have the other references easily available.

And yes, I, and hopefully the person I am with are in it to have as much fun and whatever else(wink)as possible with absolutely no drama attached.

Doesn't this entire hobby essentially revolve around NSA sex?  If that's not what you're after, then I really don't think being a provider is the right line of work, as this isn't exactly the best way to meet potential life mates.

I agree and I'm kind of baffled, so I'd like to hear more from lilli or anyone else.  I just returned to this after 15 years away.  It's all changed and everything I've learned on TER and BGFE told me I absolutely needed P411 or DateCheck verification to see anybody.

There are plenty of UTR providers who may think as Lilli does. I am not sticking up for this kind of logic, but she is at liberty to decide as to what works the best for her. Speaking for myself while being on the other side of the fence (client) I know that I hesitate to go see someone whose TER review pages goes beyond 5 and if it goes 10+, then I'll just skip over that provider. I am not naive and I do gather that some ladies change their names and hence their TER ID's after a while, but personally, the notion of being with someone  whom I can verify of having been a continuous provider for over 7 years, just kills the desire in me.

Thank you, sweetheart.  Sounds like another vote for basically all equal.

...as a more meaningful reference, or is TER just an example in this case?

Three replies so far.  All saying DATE-CHECK, P411 and TER referrals are equally significant (unless maturebridgette was saying she had a preference for TER).  Any other ladies have an opinion about this?
DATE-CHECK, P411 and TER - are referrals from any one any more significant or meaningful than the others?

for me this is quite a bit more serious than a "hobby," but i guess it's a convenient term. anywho, as i've shared ad nauseum, the fact that providing is not something i do to earn a living, hints that my motivations are probably a bit different than the norm. and no i'm certainly not looking to find a "life mate" (already have one of those, lucky me! ). my goal is holistic service, companionship, and kinship with those men who need it. i'd like to feel that i make a positive difference, however small, in someone's life.

now NSA sex is awesome, and i highly recommend it to those who are wired for it. i partake in it myself on occasion...but completely outside the confines of this little world, that's all. i just have very specific goals within this, hence a very narrow focus.

so, i do not offer my service to hobbyists...however if a so-called hobbyist were to meet me outside the confines of this world, and approached me respectfully, then there's a fairly decent chance we could scrump...sans the green paper. now who could possibly be offended by that? lol

...for offering your perspective from the other side. i've wondered about the same thing myself.

3 out of 3 respondents (as near as I can tell) indicate equivalent significance of references from DATE-CHECK, P411 and TER, that is, none having more substantive meaning than the others.

Not a statistically significant sample, but what are ya gonna do?

Ladies, thank you for playing!

Oh, well, I just signed up for Date Check anyway.  But I liked lilli's last answer.  Hey, everybody should do it however they want and  be respected.

Manning up with the alias mangina slinging, are ya?  Possibly you haven't heard of everything?

I'm fortunate to know a UTR provider who values intimacy, long steady relationships (such as they are), and low volume over the making-a-ton-of-money-fucking-absolutely-anybody-at-all approach.  She would rather develop fewer, more stable relationships with her clients than to have a monster train of them, perhaps coming from heavy player backgrounds.  I think that's probably not either horrible or hypocritical.  The UTR provider I know is by far the most awesome repeat provider experience I have.

I don't want to put words in lilli's mouth, but maybe that's all she's saying.  There's so much gray area and so many variations on how this is done, there's probably room for a way that's not completely consistent with your thinking.

That's also the way I interpreted her comments.  I never imagined someone could be in the business with that approach, but, hey, what's wrong with it?  I did not take it as a criticism, just simply as a preference.

...I use them as a list of ladies TO BE CONTACTED. "Okay" or whatever is never enough for me, and I encourage anyone who sees that I've verified someone on P411/DC/TER to please contact me for more info. I'm not giving out intimate personal details or anything, but I'll let you know if he's talkative or shy, humorous or serious, or if he has any other personality/physical quirks you'd want to know beforehand.

Well, guess I just increased the total to 4 out of 4.

Just wondering though --

I'm a guy who has only been to a few providers - basically before joining TER - and more in the way of AMPs & LMPs.  Since a member here, saw 1 from what I believe is a very reputable agency (Aphrodite) - yet agencies can't provide references on TER.  The other provider, who is independent and very nice - never gets around to putting the reference up on TER as she's not a member.

I joined Datecheck at first to get approved by Aprhodite == then figured I didn't need it once I went to them.  They're very willing to provide a reference for me - which they've done (re: party invites, etc.).

And lilli - i kinda like your approach - can you pm me your contact info as there are quite a few ladies by the same name here?

~ smiling guy

So, you only want to see a bunch of regulars who will become your ATF guys?  For those of us that like variety, I suppose we move on.

I'm not a "hobbyist" - I'm a guy. I don't see "providers" - I see ladies. I'm a member of RS2K for the simple reason that I DON'T see ladies that often. (BTW, I'm a little disappointed to hear that RS2K charges ladies for referrals - is this true across the board?). I have 1 good, solid reference (maybe 2?). When I go to see a lady (infrequently, at best), it is not "hobbying" to me - it's Christmas, New Year's, and 4/20 all rolled up (or packed) into one, and if the ladies on my very short list of references are not available, the service is a valuable asset. Reference services have different values to different people on both sides of the fence. Just an old hippie's point of view.

They are all fairly even-steven with me. They might be honest okay or recommendations but they might not be. I take refs with a grain of salt. Sometimes a guy with many high rec's or okays from others can be very flaky or ymmv with you...it happens.