You said, "wouldn't the quality perhaps improve over time as the hobbyist and provider strengthen some emotional bond, if any?"
The answer to this is yes, it probably would.
The flip side is that it can lead to other problems. When you "connect" like that week in and week out, you develop more than a "lust" for the person. Jealously creeps in: she doesn't want you to see other providers, you don't want her plying her trade, etc.
You can also fall in love, it's happened more in this scenario than in casual hobbying. And why not? You see her at her most beautiful and sexiest moments, when she wants nothing more than to please you, and then leave when the laundry, dishes and vacuuming start. She sees you at your best also, not when you're sleeping on the couch, farting to Monday Night Football.
If you are looking for lust, play the field and check the reviews. If you are looking for a relationship with another woman, look elsewhere, or meet the provider on a different turf and setting.
Happy Hobbying!
Hello all,
I'm a newbie here, having just ponied up my 20 bucks, an expense I find to be well worth it I must say. I don't like to depart on any venture half-ass so the reviews and message boards here are extremely helpful.
I've seen many hobbyists with ten or more reviews, some with twenty or more, and some over forty! I realize that variety is a prime component of the male sex drive, so I understand these numbers in those more devoted hobbyists. Give me time - perhaps I'll catch up! LOL
What I was wondering is what are the merits to sticking with one provider versus patronizing multiple providers? Are there any guys out there who have one vixen they've decided to stick with instead of playing the field, so to speak? As far as service is concerned wouldn't the quality perhaps improve over time as the hobbyist and provider strengthen some emotional bond, if any?
Any comments most welcome.
Thanks,
Rich
v
Providers are independent contractors. They take vacations when they feel like it - and probably don't send out emails or call all their regulars to announce this. Retire (and unretire) when they wish. Or they can be booked up when you really need some relief.
Some on this board mention that they really enjoy the thrill of meeting a provider for the first time.
Many of the guys with big review numbers probably started before word of this hobby got out and LE activity was negligible.
For some it's the variety and for others it the reassurance of a sure thing it just depends on what makes you most comfortable or gets you the most aroused after all the name of the game is more bang for the buck is it not.
Variety is the spice of life! So many lovelies, so little time, so few $'s!
I have a favorite who I have seen many times. I also know that if I call her, she will get me in and we have great time together. The usual session will last for well over of an hour, but I will have booked 30 min. However, I know we are "friends" and we do talk on the phone outside of buisness. However, she sees clients, and I see other providers, that is the nature of this hobby. So, you can have a wonderful, emotional connection with a provider, and still get the variety. There is nothing wrong with connecting with some one as long as the rules are understood.
Just my thoughts, LR
I don't think I can add any better insight to this than to what
LR and the others above have mentioned....
"Keep on Pimpin'!"
Lustman
You said, "wouldn't the quality perhaps improve over time as the hobbyist and provider strengthen some emotional bond, if any?"
The answer to this is yes, it probably would.
The flip side is that it can lead to other problems. When you "connect" like that week in and week out, you develop more than a "lust" for the person. Jealously creeps in: she doesn't want you to see other providers, you don't want her plying her trade, etc.
You can also fall in love, it's happened more in this scenario than in casual hobbying. And why not? You see her at her most beautiful and sexiest moments, when she wants nothing more than to please you, and then leave when the laundry, dishes and vacuuming start. She sees you at your best also, not when you're sleeping on the couch, farting to Monday Night Football.
If you are looking for lust, play the field and check the reviews. If you are looking for a relationship with another woman, look elsewhere, or meet the provider on a different turf and setting.
Happy Hobbying!
I agree with this. Proceed with caution, and remember what you are there for. The quality of the sessions *may* improve for both of you, but it can be very hard in practice for this not to become a more "strings attached" scenario than either of you may have bargained for. Clue: if you feel yourself becoming more attached, or having any "real time" fantasies about a provider either (1) try to move the relationship to a real-time level or (2) find another provider. It would be healthier for you both.
For me, the variety keeps me going, and from time to time I do see certain providers more than that one time. The beauty of this "hobby" is that the emotional attachment is minimal or non-existent and therefore there is no guilt involved in seeing another provider.
I do have a handful of providers I consider to be friends, as well as once in a while partners, and one of the things I enjoy best about this is that I can actually talk to them about other providers I have seen. One in fact actually gave me the names of 2 other providers she thought I'd enjoy.
On the other side of the coin, a friend of mine just sees one provider, once or twice weekly, and has been doing so for about a year, never seems to tire of her, and probably has a different opinion.
I dont think any provider would give you bonus points for only seeing them. They expect you will be dabbling here and there. The good point to seeing a provider more than once is that you build a rapport and may enjoy yourself more.
If you want to only see one woman, a gf would be better, and most of the ladies here arent looking for a bf.
Real simple, move around and if you find a person you really enjoy spending time with, see her again, but no one expects an exclusive committment, or rewards one.
I am very loyal to my friend. I could play the field, but do not want too. I really enjoy knowing her and she knowing me. It's makes for a great time when we meet.
Just me and what I enjoy!
I began this adventure in January 2001 seeking sex (after a divorce), and companionship. The agency didn't provide GFE, but I didn't care. The girls feigned companionship and delivered sex.
.
Then I found TER this spring and discovered independents. I began repeating visits with providers.
.
One remarkable PSE (with the divine Miss K) helped crystallize my thought processes as to what I expect to get from the hobby. It was like Moses walking out of the desert with the Israelites and into the land of Egypt.
I WISH to be treated as her lover, to feel as if for our fleeting time together that we are but one being jointed erotically for mutual pleasure. Notwithstanding this is fantasy, satisfaction requires I perceive that attention is given and received .... by both of us .... not equally perhaps; but my repeat providers are not 100% play actresses nor 100% committed to loving me, if you can imagine drawing a continuum between those two imaginary points.
The infectious and wicked smile, the personality that goes on and on, and the great sex make this worthwhile.
Monogamy .... no; bigamy ... I think I count a little higher. But my 'starters are my starters'
-- Modified on 9/22/2002 6:52:23 AM
I have tended over time to have a certain degree of "loyalty" to a few gals. I say loyalty, but at the same time this should not be construed as exclusivity & certainly not monogomy, I simply saw a selected few as opposed to constantly seeking out someone new. There are two reasons I got involved in this hobby in the first place--to avoid entanglements & the almost inevitable problems that the end of that road might bring eventually when there is an exclusive kind of arrangement.
Of those I had this degree of loyalty to, I have been fortunate enough to meet a few extremely wonderful ladies, a couple of whom that I feel a definite connection with...but different sort of connection than some might think---much more of a caring about them as individuals & about their welfare, both now & in the future...really, in my own mind at least, thinking of them as much in a caring about a friend vein as in liking/wanting them in a sexual way.
And while I'm not stupid enough to have ever thought of these gals in any sort of fanstasy romantic way, there are still times that I question myself about giving a shit as much as I do. Perhaps I'll learn in time to simply consider them all as various cuts of meat (it'd certainly make things easier on me)...but do I really want to do that? Too become so unconcerned with other people that to adopt that attitude? Others may disagree, but it's not me to feel that way...& ultimately it's me that I'm most concerned with.
So flame away all those who think I'm naive...for all I know you're right.