I've indicated to a lady to let me know when she is next in town. I am one of her admirers. Recently however, I can across a more revealing photo and my interest has diminished. I no longer desire to meet her. [The lady simply has certain normal, physical attributes that I do not find appealing. Nothing wrong with her - it is all about what I like and don't like.] So, should I be honest about it? Or should I pass along a "our schedules won't work out" reply when she contacts me?
I am the type of person who seeks a pleasant experience for all, particularly the ladies whom I have been fortunate to meet and experience. However, I had a past experience that still troubles me.
I arranged to meet a Chicago lady who posts an endless array of retro pinup type photos. However, when I met her, her legs were covered with tattoos. On her website, tattoos are not mentioned or "covered" in any of her photos. She simply has none in the photos. I have nothing against ink, in fact I have come to really appreciate it, but the surprise was so dramatic it spoiled the encounter for me. Unfortunately, I never reviewed this lady, but it still troubles me when I see her ads ads knowing she is yet to dupe some other guy.
This time I know ahead of time that I won't be happy. But I'd like to know how best to communicate my change of plans. Thanks to the ladies for their input.
is not a "dupe some other guy", c'mon!
that's why its important for you to be clear while requesting a booking. It would be very easy to ask "I rather not meet a lady that has tattoos, do you have any?" She could say yes and that would be the end of the conversation
that's why its important for you to be clear while requesting a booking. It would be very easy to ask "I rather not meet a lady that has tattoos, do you have any?" She could say yes and that would be the end of the conversation.
The tattoos can be removed from photos by professionals easily and just as easily the provider and list she has tattoos but that you have to see them in person.
Trust me: the guys who care won't book and the ones who don't care will likely have fun finding them all.
It's perfectly acceptable for her to cover them in her photos in order to help her retain some anonymity. She should note this for potential clients though. There are some that don't like ink and don't want to see a provider that has it. I'm not saying in this case the lady is being deliberately deceitful. It may be she just hasn't considered this so I do agree with you that it isn't automatically a "dupe" situation.
Additionally the TER provider profile has a place for tattoos to be noted. The OP should file a Problem Report to get the ladies profile changed or write a review and create a profile if she doesn't already have one.
It is deceptive advertising. I get covering them for privacy but if one does so in an industry in part based on looks it is on the provider to disclose she has them. How is I guy to know to ask if they aren't in her photos nor mentioned in her text? He wouldn't.
then make sure we check off all the boxed in the first call? How about some basic truth in advertising?
If you've got tattoos don't hide them. If you've got a lot of piercings don't hid them -- unless you're planning on not wearing any during the session. I get that a blurred face is something of a protective action but you can blur to the point where features can be mostly seen but no one could ever recognize the person from the photo. Photoshopping a size 12 to a size 2...do we need to ask about that too?
As a rather heavily-inked chick who obscures all tattoos for privacy reasons, I make absolutely sure to make mention of it several times on my ads and website. I don't want anyone being surprised.
just tell her you're having an emergency kidney transplant (or something similar - liver, heart, lung, etc.), and you'll be out of action for several months. Invite her to contact you again when she returns to your town and if you're healthy enough for sex, maybe you can do it then. No hurt feelings, no awkwardness, etc., because the excuse is not within the control of either one of you. Chances are, she will not contact you again. If she does, just say you are still recovering, or had to hang up your spurs after the operation.
The one time I'm being completely serious, and you think its funny!!!
You've gotta be kidding, right? I'm actually laughing out loud. I'm really not sure what's wrong with being honest. I, myself, am the type of gal to always let it go (with heavy suspicion) when a gent pops up with some extreme medical condition, however some girls might just try to visit you in the hospital! LOL
the ones that tell me I made them cum four times in 18 minutes. My examples may have been a bit extreme, but the point should be obvious: Come up with an excuse that is not within the control of either party in order to avoid any hint of drama. In my example, she might even feel sympathy for him and may offer to come over and make him some soup while he recovers . . . . . maybe even miraculously. Or, you could say you murdered someone and you won't be able to see her until you are acquitted at trial in a few months because you're currently in custody, so would she please wait? Fancy hearing back from that one!
No hospital visits would be possible because he had to BUY the kidney. Its in India, so she is not likely to try to visit him. You can be suspicious all you want, but you don't really know for sure, do you? Trust me, it works. As long as all the providers don't get together and compare notes and realize, if you put it all together, I have had every major organ replaced, I think I get away with it.
If she contacts you just tell her your schedules are not going to work out....you don't need to explain all that just keep it simple!
"I can across a more revealing photo and my interest has diminished. I no longer desire to meet her. "
-Showing It All-
is not all it's cracked up to be.
That's why there's PhotoShop.
MYSTERY and FANTASY are Excellent for Selling.
Not many girls show All the parts of their beautifulness because
there are guys who will not appreciate their beautifulness,
and therefore not Buy.
The girl will cover up the body parts she knows are not "sellers"
and surround her best parts in MYSTERY and FANTASY.
I eliminate "Buyer's Remorse" by showing it All.
Is this the way to go?
I have lost a date,
because it is not what the guy who needs MYSTERY and FANTASY in the deal will Buy.
You're worried about being "honest" with her?
Who is going to reprimand you for wanting to Buy exactly what it is you want to Buy?
You don't like a girl with colorful legs... fine, there's plenty that don't have them-
Pick one of them-
and Wonder,
"What is She covering up?"
*Let the girl, with the colorful legs, know in plenty of time,
so she can get another booking
Are you worrying about something that is likely to happen? So you said let me know if you're going to be in my town. Has she toured there before, did she respond with a WILL DO - planning a tour next month? Chances are she won't reach out to you first. If she does, tell her you're not available those dates.
I don't think a potential client is under any obligation whatsoever to explain why or why not he decides to see me. That's your business! My business is being honest about who I am so you can make an informed decision.
As for the tattoo thing: I might even go a little overboard with my tattoo disclaimers - that's how much I don't want anyone being disappointed or dismayed at the door!
bbying is incredibly expensive. You can't go into a session not 100% excited to see the lady. Obviously every session is not a home run, but you certainly should think its going to be a home run at the start.
To that end, if you are not attracted to a provider because of her attributes, then you don't see her. Period. In this case, telling her the truth: "Sorry, I'm not attracted to ladies who are heavily inked" is really not going to be crushing to her ego/self esteem. Men are visual... We all find different looks sexy/appealing (My 10 is someone else's 6) Spend your cash on someone whom you are attracted to.
Now, if you are worried about "hurting her feelings" (again, telling her you don't like tattoos is not that big a deal), then yes, tell her simply " Sorry, something came up and I don't have the time to see you this visit". She's not going to question you further. If she contacts you the next time she is in town, and you tell her again you can't see her, she'll eventually get the memo that you don't want to see her.
Now, I do agree that a lady who is heavily inked (no, not a 1/2 inch daisy on the back of her neck) should convey that on her website if her photos completely cover the tattoos for privacy. If you don't find tattoos appealing, then yes, you should know whether the lady has them in order to decide if you want to see her.
A provider that hides heavy tattoos in her photos should mention that she has them in her ads, site or profiles
If they have a ter profile send in a problem report
though one fav had some but they were not conspicious & after the initial viewing, I don't think I noticed them again.
I bet you won't know where the tattoo starts and where flesh ends.
New meaning to blind date...
do a whole date blind folded, but I just haven't reached that level of comfort with anyone yet. That would require a serious level of trust.
The tattoo issue should have been addressed with that provider after the date mentioning that her site should have a tattoo warning (see my site) as a heads up to potential dates.
Other than that sounds like you know what to do and are looking for someone to nudge you in that direction.
Where pray tell did you find these "more revealing" image or the lady you plan to not meet?
I am the type of person who seeks a pleasant experience for all, particularly the ladies whom I have been fortunate to meet and experience. However, I had a past experience that still troubles me.
I arranged to meet a Chicago lady who posts an endless array of retro pinup type photos. However, when I met her, her legs were covered with tattoos. On her website, tattoos are not mentioned or "covered" in any of her photos. She simply has none in the photos. I have nothing against ink, in fact I have come to really appreciate it, but the surprise was so dramatic it spoiled the encounter for me. Unfortunately, I never reviewed this lady, but it still troubles me when I see her ads ads knowing she is yet to dupe some other guy.
This time I know ahead of time that I won't be happy. But I'd like to know how best to communicate my change of plans. Thanks to the ladies for their input.
... she clearly likes it. Whether you do or not is immaterial. Mentioning it would be insulting at worst, very poor taste at best.
are a major cause of disappointment in meetings.
For some of us, we prepare and prepare to meet long, silky brown hair shown in dozens of photos. With no warning, she shows up with a blond pixie cut. As cute or as pretty as she might be, it is so disorienting as to be disappointing and can ruin a session.
Likewise, many other "minor" factors become major factors when they surprise the hell out of us.
Some features should be on the website or ad ("My tattoos are airbrushed out of my photos for privacy reasons."). Others should be covered in preliminary communications ("I just changed my hair do. I hope you'll like it."). It gives us a chance to prepare and adjust our expectations.
However minor you might think they are, unfulfilled expectations can make a 10/10 session seem like a 7/7.
I am the type of person who seeks a pleasant experience for all, particularly the ladies whom I have been fortunate to meet and experience. However, I had a past experience that still troubles me.
I arranged to meet a Chicago lady who posts an endless array of retro pinup type photos. However, when I met her, her legs were covered with tattoos. On her website, tattoos are not mentioned or "covered" in any of her photos. She simply has none in the photos. I have nothing against ink, in fact I have come to really appreciate it, but the surprise was so dramatic it spoiled the encounter for me. Unfortunately, I never reviewed this lady, but it still troubles me when I see her ads ads knowing she is yet to dupe some other guy.
This time I know ahead of time that I won't be happy. But I'd like to know how best to communicate my change of plans. Thanks to the ladies for their input.
Actually not the piercing itself, but nipple jewelry is a major turn-on
...an example of a DIFFERENT woman with tattoos which he didn't know about prior to his visit so it spoiled the encounter for him.
The woman who is the subject of his OP has "certain normal, physical attributes" that the OP does not find appealing. He found out about these "attributes" recently after seeing more revealing photos of her and wanted to know how he can get out of seeing her.
To the OP: You haven't committed to see her. You just said: "Let me know when you visit my town." You haven't seen her before so you don't even know if she will contact you. She may be pre-booked with regulars in your city or booked up with men who responded to her ad. Don't worry about it - if she contacts you, say you've made previous arrangements with someone else. Who knows, that might even be the truth.
I've been meaning to say the exact same thing for hours, but keep getting interrupted before making the post that you just did.
so yeah, What he said.
Or he could always do what the women do when they don't want to see someone and simply ignore her emails in the future, it is kind of a chickenshit way to deal with it, but hey what's good for the goose and all that crap, right?
a couple of providers (probably with tattoos) jumped on the OP about a side comment about tattoos. Don't worry about it. They won't be the first providers to lose their focus.
Play the old song or the new one from Train and you'll come up with some ideas.
I wouldn't worry to much. She may never even let you know so it might not ever be a bridge you have to cross. If you do just be polite and considerate regardless how you address it.
-- Modified on 11/3/2016 1:58:51 PM
DO contact HER if/when she comes to your city. (Unless she regularly tours your city.) Then if you change your mind, there's no awkward situation. But for now, I can say most guys who ask us to visit cities' schedules don't match up when we do. To me, that whole process is very inefficient anyway. I would NOT be honest, because if she was accurately portraying herself, you telling her you are not attracted to her in some way is going to come across kind of messed up.
There are times you can be too honest. You approached her. She is not forcing you to see her, nor asking for a cancellation fee.
If something that easy can ruin it for you (the more revealing picture, that reveals something you're particular about,) I personally suggest the "if's, maybe's, when's" might not be a good option for you. I had to work on this too with being a consumer in other ways.
She may not even contact you. I would approach the subject if it arises. If you don't know what to say right when she emails, just sit on it.
Regarding the tattoos, none of us are the bosses of anyone else, but I can see how you would be stressed out about that. You come worked up for one style, and completely have to change the preparation you've done in anticipation. That's a style. Alternative vs princess Jasmine is a big difference. There's discretion, and then there's lack of communication where it is kind of important. My opinion at least.
Anyway, there is a possibility you may have missed it on her website?
Good luck
Who else watching troll trace dot com South park ?
That is priceless. they need to do something about our trolls
You wouldn't know any of those however, now would you?
BTW, I thought you were leaving this place, please don't tell me you were just teasing us.
If/when she contacts you, just tell her you have other commitments. No need to go into great detail.
I am the type of person who seeks a pleasant experience for all, particularly the ladies whom I have been fortunate to meet and experience. However, I had a past experience that still troubles me.
I arranged to meet a Chicago lady who posts an endless array of retro pinup type photos. However, when I met her, her legs were covered with tattoos. On her website, tattoos are not mentioned or "covered" in any of her photos. She simply has none in the photos. I have nothing against ink, in fact I have come to really appreciate it, but the surprise was so dramatic it spoiled the encounter for me. Unfortunately, I never reviewed this lady, but it still troubles me when I see her ads ads knowing she is yet to dupe some other guy.
This time I know ahead of time that I won't be happy. But I'd like to know how best to communicate my change of plans. Thanks to the ladies for their input.
OP is acting like after a civie first date when you need to blow her off cause you're not interested. Should I call, should I text, should I just let a non-response give the clues? If you're a nice guy you spend a lot of time worrying about hurting someone's feelings. In a situation like this though it's just like after a first date, the chick doesn't care either way, probably doesn't even give one shit much less two if you live or die or speak to her again. Just blow her off, don't respond or make up some nice excuse. Don't be that overly self conscience dumb ass that tries to explain how you saw her ass in another photo in an unflattering light and it made your stomach curl. Don't be him, please.