This will likely never go away and the guys that think it means "carte blanche" because they have your number or e-mail address is mind blowing, but they persist. He's a low grade stalker for sure and if he's waiting to see you in '11 tell him to send a pre-donation as a means to facilitate your meeting. It might turn him off just enough to leave you alone.

"Planning for pussy 9 months ahead of time is quite odd andboarderline creepy"

Five to One says he is just a creepy ,time waster and will no show, if he doesn't cancel before his 9 months of wasting her time is up. .
Ten to one says she is not very bright to make a appt 9 months in advance.
There are no shortages of gullible men and women in all occupations.

Wouldn't that be a riot? Start out booking with a non pregant, childless woman, and ending up with a  MILF. lol

gambler"Wouldn't that be a riot? Start out booking with a non pregant, childless woman, and ending up with a  MILF."

Only You!!! ROFLMAO Thats one for the Books

What size dress, blouse, shoes do you wear?


Sorry; inside joke. LOL

and i'm not sure i have time to do all that today.LOL

I see this as an issue, not for all but the select few. Wanting to push the time limits and then post in a review,*she stayed over the time limit*
Texting IMs emails to just say *hi* and sending jokes and so on.
I have a person, not Even a client at this point, who plans to see me in Febuary of 2011 but contacted me last May to introduce himself. Ever since then has PMed me on a semi regular basis to comment on my pics my posts and my reviews, as if between now and Feb 2011 we will build a relationship of sorts.
At this point I am doubting I want to see him. If it carrys on like this between now and next Feb I see this as a stalker type and will avoid him at all costs.
I am in business. Yes, its a business of socialization and most get it and friendshipos are also formed but there are more timewasters out there trying to drag us down who are completely confused about what the *GFE* experience is all about. This is not the love connection its a board where hos and Johns chit chat exchange info and get to know a bit about each other. Its NOT dating.
I have ppl I care about in this biz on both sides but all connections are not like that and everyone who contacts me will not be that way. At the end of the day I close up shop and go home and back to my *real life* with family and friends and my job for that day is over.
There are some who over step entertain too much in the *GFE* concept. its a GF experience not a GF connection.  Reality check here!!!!

but that means I see them often.  And those friendships are 'limited'.  Can't have a relationship with someone I never met.
Agree this guy it over the top.  Dump him.
skb

Planning for pussy 9 months ahead of time is quite odd andboarderline creepy..... You are right some guys dont understand that this is a BUSINESS and that the fantasy ends at the end of your allotted time. Don't get me wrong I have  made many friends in this hobby.  But at no time do the lines between bussines and  friendship get blurred.

"It was just a gripe how not everone knows where the line is drawn on the GFE playing field."


I don't have the answer however I can see the dilemma you are faced with.
Look at all the people in the suburbs and rural areas,who don't walk facing traffic, or drivers who ignre the line that says, do not block intersection.
There are many flagrant wrong direction, and crossing the line  violators, in every town.
Think about all the hobbyists that have never had a civvy GF, or one for more than a week.
When a provider I haven't seen in months sends me a email telling me she had a dream about me last night, and we were having sex, I think, "that was cute and creative", and realize  she will soon be  visiting my town.
When you rocked desperate for a GF Hobbyist's  world,for the first time in his life, he doesn't know which way to go. If you told him he was in your dreams, or he has a nice nose ............Confusion takes over.
I would wager Johngaltnh could come up with a list of Ten Easy questions to ask every new hobbyist prospect, before second  email contact, to insure you find a high percentage of hobbyists, that "know" how to walk with providers..
I'm not sure if he would make the questions short.. lol

When he tried to make an appointment 9 months in advance, I would have told him to call back in 8 months. That ought to put him in his place. He feels like he is your client now and that you are obligated to keep him company.

By the way, despite my alias I'm not a provider.

You have control of the situation. You can simply not answer his emails, take a week to answer them or even send him an email that says "You know, I don't have time and interest for chit-chat, so if you could knock it off, that would be swell."

Don't play the wife game. You know the game where a wife expects the guy to be a mind reader. As you said, this isn't the love connection. So if it isn't the love connection, just state your preferences outright, albeit tactfully. I would hazard a guess that, once your preferences are expressed, he will comply with them. Most guys have no desire to creep someone out and only do what they do because they feel encouraged to continue. Throw up a barrier he understands to actually BE a barrier, and he stops.

The reason I think you are over-reacting is that you have not reported taking even the most basic steps to ameliorate his behavior; and now think of him as a "stalker type" because he hasn't read your mind.

Now, you may think what you are stating is entirely intuitive and universally applicable. But it is not. There are providers I've seen only 4 times, spread out over a wide time frame -- and who I don't even see for sex anymore, where we've met each other's respective families &c. Every person is different. It's not always strictly about fucks for bucks.

So while your admonition may well be true for yourself and *generally* true; keep in mind that his behavior may be based upon interactions with other providers who don't see things the way you see them.

As such, it is incumbent upon you to state YOUR specific desires and make them clear. Or, you could even make a statement on your website: "Only 4 emails total will be answered prior to meeting. All others are unread." Or whatever. It's up to you to figure out how to state it tactfully.

So simply tell this guy your feelings.

If you state it crudely enough, granted, you'll turn him off and lose his business. But if things continue as-is, you'll likely turn away his business anyway -- based on your possibly erroneous feeling that he is a stalker type. So there is nothing to lose by *communicating*. And if you do so in a somewhat tactful fashion, you may even be able to retain his business AND skip his emails!

Yeppity do da day on that one...no way would I make an appointment 9 months out..heck I don't make them 1 month out. So many things can change. A simple..."how about you shoot me an email the week before to reconnect and see if our schedules will mesh....etc"...

Proper planning prevents piss poor performance but this is stretching things to breaking point.

My advice to the young lady is cancel...you can give 9 months notice and block him if you're starting to feel creepy..

Jus let him know that you would prefer no contact until a few days before your scheduled date. I have the same situation with a client that I am scheduled to see after the first of the year. I really don't mind his occasional email, just to say hi. I think it makes him more comfortable to stay in touch. He is coming from another country and plans well ahead of time. I think this is his way of making sure I will still be around when he gets here, nothing worse than planning months ahead then get to your destination and end up spending your time alone alone. It only takes a few minutes of my time to send a reply.

I stated a person wants to see me in 2011 I never agreed to see him. I told him Feb is a long way off and some time in Jan would be a good time to be verified.
I never set an appt but the constant IMs emails and so on are bothersome. I have met men like this before who book appts a month or so in advance and engross themselves in contacting you from then til the appt and it always goes bad. I now aviod men like this completely.
You assumed there was an appt set just as he assumes I will see him come the time, neither of you were correct.

I don't feel helpless or as a victim I am just griping about the insanity some bring into this hobby.
I never set an appt made plans with him or agreed to see him I am just stating those out there who have this mindset are off their rocker. They assume since this is an intimate business it is like courting.
Some ppl just shouldn't play here is all I was stating.  Yet instead of my message it got lost and turned into some chick who takes appts close to a year in advance from some nutcase who intends to email her from now til Feb and then some.

I believe this was just a Reality check stating what is very over bearing and annoying about how some misunderstand what GFE is all about.

There is no appt scheduled, there never was and I am certain there never will be. I am washing my hands of it all. It was just a gripe how not everone knows where the line is drawn on the GFE playing field. Thats all...  Geesh!!!!

... and as Charlie Papazian says, "have a homebrew."

I ain't takin' this stuff too seriously and neither should you. What you should do instead is take a nice long bubble bath and let a nice hunky man give you a relaxing deep-tissue massage and don't worry.

BTW, I routinely book as long as a year in advance.  So far, in 4 years, I have had to cancel once due to things beyond my control. Which, btw, sucks the big one as I wouldn't book someone I didn't want to see. Either way, for some segments of the hobby, long-planned bookings work fine.

And when they don't, to quote Charlie again, "relax, don't worry, have a homebrew."

I can write a piece of software that randomly emails a provider at variable intervals and asks her questions. One or two per email. I could base it on Eliza (early form of artificial intelligence that pretends to be a psychoanalyst) so that subsequently it sends responses back to the lady's responses. Maybe she won't even realize for months that it is a bot!

I think that I could even make it adaptive using a sliding Dark Knight ... White Knight setting; so that it would change its phraseology from "Your pics are hot I just wanna fuck you and leave ... and, by the way, don't speak" to "What a charming personality you have, let's have tea!"

I'm only kidding! I wouldn't do that to anyone. But I admit that I chuckle a bit at the thought of it. (*grin*)

I don't really make beer because I eat a gluten-free diet; but I make a lot of wine -- and the stuff takes months to be ready.

But the bubble bath and massage by a tall-muscular guy named "Hans" is doable.

Just tell him that.

Might hit a sensitive spot for some, but her writing style truly has me chuckling. Hope the laughter offends no one!!

On a more serious note, can't knock a guy for wanting ya! However, it is really hard to keep up and your pain is felt! Even with friends, it becomes hard to keep up...

-- Modified on 8/10/2010 6:28:41 AM

He's not a timewaster.  He plans his annual trip to the US months in advance.  His emails are always polite and courteous.  If there's a change in his plans that could affect your date with him, he's considerate enough to send a heads up.  

He's not a stalker.  He's a very nice gentleman from another country eagerly anticipating his trip to the US.  
He's as polite and courteous in person as he is in his emails.  I'm looking forward to seeing him again in February.

If you're uncomfortable with his emails or PM's did you consider bringing it up to him first?  Perhaps giving him an opportunity to adjust to your level of comfort?   That would have been a tad more business-like than kvetching about it here.