I remember seeing a gal who was sexy as hell, had a full menu, great personality, and priced well below market.  

While I was performing DATY.
Smelled minty fresh....but still not a fan of being gassed.
I was given a free trip to Greece tho....
Guess that's some consolation.

My first one accualy good provider but was riding bicycle her pimp bike jack me.

When she said she couldn’t suck my dick because she burned her mouth on a cup of coffee.

She claimed she was having a bad hair day...….and it turned into a buzz kill......lol

He said he was eating out a gal one day when she let loose.

My girl kicked her old ass out and quickly locked the door. Some of these millennials are heartless.

She says  

She passed out giving me a blow job.  I rolled out from under her, covered her with a blanket and let myself out.

Your OWN drinking, your load would not have a high enough alcohol content to make her pass out.  Lol

If she was wearing the OPPOSING team’s cap, you could turn it into a sexy kind of “HATE fuck!” 😉

On her smartphone.

Her saying ‘Don’t cum yet’.  Yes, you can guess what happened next.

My SD got so upset!!!!

Was hitting it from behind and a smell hit me instantly. She had poor wiping technique, and obviously didn’t shower after dropping a deuce. Glad I don’t always go down on providers because she was probably a back to front kind of wiper. Let’s just say I haven’t repeated.

Was meeting a young and when I got to her place, things were going great, I got naked, she took everything off but she only kept her socks on. It wasn't a cold day so I was curious as to why. I asked but she was reluctant to say or to take them off. After some coaxing she took her socks off and WHOA! She had one of those police ankle bracelets. She was under some kinda of house arrest. We had a good laugh and the session went great. I found it kinda exciting, doing some convict.

...by a provider; thankfully our otherwise fun session had been completed.

One girl was drunk at her incall, she had downed most of a bottle red wine with her previous client.  About 15 min into it, she was deepthroating me (not very deep) and threw up half a bottle of red on my crotch.

After they remove the cover, they reach for a wet-wipe to clean me up a little, but it feels like its been stored in the refrigerator.  The contrasting coldness compared to the ultra-warm place I had just been shrivels my dick up and my balls completely disappear to someplace inside my body.  Immediately after, they always ask, "Want to go again?"  My stock answer  . . . . . " I WOULD have liked to."  

Evaporation is a cooling process

Ok..... This has to be near the top. Traveling to Myrtle Beach on biz, and still fairly new to the hobby, and knew less about the various sites and resources.  

15 years or so ago in Atlanta I see a girl touring through Atlanta that looked just smoking hot, she claimed she had been in a car wreck and needed the funds to get out of town and was offering a big discount for anyone who could come see her TODAY. Well I am not one who needs a lot of time to make a decision, so I called her up, (yes this was back in the days where we actually CALLED to make an appointment) got the directions and told her I'd be right over.

Loved this story, ya can`t make this stuff up if you tried. Only you GaGa, cracked me up big time! And you paid her too. That speaks volumes to me.

These boards and twitter are FULL of hookers who make the average John's weekly paycheck in a single hour constantly panhandling for handouts.

The hospital had me in casts on both arms and both legs.

BIG DEAL!!  

...who played her grandmother (but not together).  I had a chance to see the actress who played the mother/daughter but I passed. Think of it - I coulda had a three generation trifecta!

Your dick isn't that big and if so she should have used more lube. That's on her.

Knowing my brother and his perpetual hard-on, or more specifically his attitude, this doesn't surprise me.

Had a scheduled meeting with someone I had see many times. She called on her way and asked if she could bring a friend. When they arrived they were both wound up .. a little high or drunk I think.  Girl #2 who I didn't know started asking for stupid shit.. Can I call downstairs and put Vallet on your room? I need to run downstairs and give my friend her prescription do you mind if I leave for a bit.. .  I was freaked and it turned an otherwise dream session into a nail biter... since then I have met both ladies separately... and its been great .. so .no harm no foul..

I reached out to a provider that I had been wanting to see for sometime, she was in town and I couldn't pass up the opportunity.  It took some finagling to make up an excuse to get out of the house, that's what bros are for.  Anywho, I make my way to her hotel, she gives me the room number, i make my way up but coming out of the elevator i run into a guy and he gives me the evil eye.  No way this guy can read my mind or so i thought.  I make my way to her room, she answers, she looks a bit surprised but lets me in.  She warms up fairly quickly, comes out of her clothes, begins an all world BBBJ, I DATY, cover up and commence to going to town.  All of a sudden knock, knock, knock, it's her husband, pimp, whoever, the same guy from the elevator.  We stop, she opens the door and I'm standing there butt ass naked with a condom on while she's arguing with him.