really put much effort in the encounter. I don't TRY to be a great lover(whatever that means) or find out "what she likes" For me, it's basically a sexual release. Kind of like a massage with benefits. Don't care what they think of me because some are good at faking that so inever really know anyway.
Whatever, I get what I get out of the deal and that's good enough for me.
Posted By: lghtmyfire
You said:
the OTC is perplexing to me. i've never had that inclination for myself or from a provider who wanted that kind of thing. it feels out of place to me like it doesn't belong as part of the arrangement.
Response:
Yes, I understand what you’re saying, at least on first encounters in most cases, however after multiple meetings if there is good chemistry that is not only physical but has shared values and interests (along with an established comfort level), then I can see OTC easily happening. Many people are social, so I don’t see it as out of place. Even sales people become friends with their clients. For example, I remember talking to one investor who said that his Realtor was his best friend. Hence, I’m not surprised that OTC was mentioned in this thread, nor in the other thread I've referred to.
You said:
As far as touching, sensations, I'm usually not one to initiate that sort of thing and assume the lady doesn't really want it. So I don't do it.
Response:
First of all, you’re touching your partner to begin with as it’s the nature of the hobby, and it’s physical with sensation. As far as initiating touching (I take it you mean on a more intimate level), it depends on what you want or what you’re open to. There is a certain skill set that is not inane but learned when it comes to not only touch, as in massage, but also in initiating it by asking questions and making suggestions. A more effective provider (in a business sense), will find out what the client wants or does not want, and if the client does not know what he wants, she makes a suggestion. Ideally, it is best for a client to know what he wants, but not necessarily be skilled in message, as he is not the one making the donation.
If time is limited to an hour or less, then go for what you want, like the sex, I take it.
My thinking is beyond the initial choice in sex, doing the other stuff enriches the experience, but it may be best to do past the hour.
You said:
Speaking of cuddling, there have only been two providers i've seen who actively pursued that during our encounter. One did it because she's a "hugger, touchy feely" type the other just did it to fulfill her GFE duties. Most just get up to clean up after were done.
Response:
Seeing more than one provider gives you a sense of variety as no two people are alike. I've only seen two to compare and contrast in this hobby. They are different, of course. Providers also see more than one client and they are different to them. What should remain consistent (in a business sense) when the session is over, it is over.
If that first provider you saw was touchy feely and you wanted something else (as you haven’t made clear on what you’ve wanted?) then ask for something else. If it’s not a good session for you, then chalk it up to experience and move on to someone else. If the other is GFE (again, not enough information here; perhaps no chemistry?*), then she did her job.** You also have that choice to see her or not (Likewise, for the providers to see a client again or not.). Depending on you bank account, you may choose to keep looking until you find someone you’d like to repeat with, or continue to see new ladies on a first time basis.
To recap: Anything that happens beyond a session, as in keeping in contact to OTC is between the two people that decide to continue. There are no rules here, unlike a psychiatrist and patient violation where the psychiatrist will lose her license; there are no licenses to lose in this game.
* On chemistry: I wouldn’t worry about what the provider thinks about you, although if the session felt special, I would look for visual cues and verbal cues to get a better sense of it, along with follow-up if she initiates it (or visa-versa) and it leads to keeping in touch. On-the-other-hand of the chemistry connection, if she claims to be a great actress and has fooled you, then that’s another skill set that works to her benefit. Forget it. But remember, people change their minds and are not always consistent; that chemistry that was initially there and later is not happens more often then we care to accept. (Plenty of divorces and relationship breakups account for it.). So, enjoy the moment for what it is.
**Providers should also know their boundaries and limits before they agree to what’s requested in a session.
. Cuddling, kissing, talking and caressing can be quite the aphrodisiac. We rush with everything else we do it seems in our lives, don't rush intimacy
