Just wondering, since that's somewhat my situation.  I stopped working for a while after a major windfall from one of my previous companies.  Now I'm doing project work from time to time, when I'm approached with stuff that interests me.  I hardly live in the lap of luxury all the time, but it works nicely for me and allows me to pursue other things that I do like.

I've kind of shied away from providers who do "work based screening" as a result of this, but I can't believe I'm the only one in this situation.  I know too many people in my age group who are in a similar financial situation.

Ladies, how do you deal with this?

MisterG

Be honest with the ladies and allow extra time for screening.  I wasn't working last year and found that worked for me, until I was offered a reference from an incredible lady in Vegas.  Same day appointments (maybe even a couple of days is pushing it) are out but most of ladies in Vegas were amenable to using other methods.

Drx

You have six reviews, MisterG, and if a lady you want to see knows one of the ladies you've reviewed, a referral is your best bet. If you are unsure if the lady you'd like to use as a reference would mind... ASK.  But many ladies will accept referrals from well known, well respected providers.

Just please don't write me and say "My reference is Tammy from Florida, I saw her ten years ago. When can I see you?" That's really not helpful  (PS, this is a fictional Tammy in Florida, just an example of some of the attempts at references I've gotten!)

Hugs*
Nicole

References!

I used to ask for "Work" references for Screening and Verification...Not anymore.

LE can fake Drivers Licenses, Airplane Boarding Tickets, Car Rental Receipts and they know to put luggage in the closet at hotels to make you think they are traveling businessmen. There are enough rumors out there that LE has their own "Work Reference" phone lines/switchboards that are fake and used soley for the purpose of work verification. An awful lot of trouble to go to for LE I know...But I've heard that rumor one too many times to ignore it. Besides, "Work" main switchboard numbers and extentions can be faked (trust me, "I" can do it and I'm not the sharpest pencil in the box).

Anyway...I ask for your REAL first & Last Name, and the Name phone number, email address (and website if she has one) of a "KNOWN" Provider. I ask that the gentleman let her know I'll be calling. I dont ask about your performance etc. All I want to know is that you are a Real Person, A Nice Guy and NOT LE. I ask to see I.D. when you arrive and that's it!

REFERENCES!

my .02 cents

Ladies, please allow me to add to this.  I am in the same boat as Mister G. (What else would you expect a sailer to say?)  I am not working and it is by choice. So how does it cause you to view the situation if the client invites you to his home as an outcall?  If you can see things like utility bills with the correct name and the right address, would you still have reservations that the client would be LE?  If yes, then I guess I am "screwed" and not in the way I want. I have been on this board for about 6 months and have not yet met any of the ladies in person.  What say you ladies?

There are services out there that "will check you out" and then for an annual fee, provide you with a reference.  I found RS2000 very helpful when I was in Chicago.  I'm assuming there are services like that all over the country.

I'd also tell her who you are on the boards.  For some reason when I know who he is, I feel better.  Not that this would ever get you a better date or proof of identity.  

Two references takes care of in-debth screening as well.  Maybe you can ask if that might set her mind at ease.

Unfortuantley, of the six reviews you mention:

* Two of those reviews were agency girls in Toronto.  I certainly wouldn't know where to reach them, and they certainly wouldn't remember me, even if they are still working which may or may not be the case.

* Three of them are with a small agency I have used here in LA.  Only one of them is still working.  I would have know idea where to reach her directly and seriously doubt the agency owner would be interested in giving out references to "the competition."

* The last one is an independent elsewhere, who I have not seen in months and honestly is a complete flake.  Not somebody I would give as a reference, even if I believed that she would bother to call you back, which she probably wouldn't.

Sadly, that's where I repeatedly find myself.  Can't get to see a "known/reliable" provider due to lack of references, can't get references due to the fact that I've never seen a "known/reliable" provider.  I end up mostly using a couple of relatively reliable agencies.

Been looking for a way around this.  Haven't found one yet.

MisterG

Hi MisterGee,
 If your trying to see providers with significant history it would be pretty safe to assume that they are not the LE.  So if your are truly desirous offer to e-mail a scanned copy of a drivers license and a utility bill.  That would definitely make the difference for me.  I know this might seem scary but don't do it with anyone that doesn't have several years of reviews.  You may even try e-mailing some of the gents that have already visited the provider you want to see.  You might state your deliemna about possibliy having to give up more info than your accustom to. You wonder given they have already met said provider would they believe the information would be in safe hands and would they do it now that they have met her.  If you are retired this might help.  If you are a self-employed businessman you might consider getting yourself into a trade journal that just is a basic listing that you could have a provider reference.  I'm self-employed and even though I don't advertise I have phone bills that reflect my business name, another possibility could even be the cover of a magazine you subscribe too showing your name.  Hope this helps.

Sweetie I hate to say it, but you are up a nasty creek without a paddle in my book, in that case... because I would have *no* way to verify you. And as to the above post about utility bills... no, that wouldn't be acceptable for me.

SOME ladies do accept lesser forms of screening... and you might want to try to find those ladies to get started again. (Some will just ask to see you drivers license).  And then once you have some references from some respected, well known ladies, you'll find many more doors opening... um, that sounds wrong, but yanno what I mean LOL! I guess the key is to look around and see if you can find those ladies who will do that, and some of them are just as wonderful as those of us who have heavier screening... we all just choose the best screening methods that work for *us*. But with a little searching I'm sure you'll find what you seek!

Good luck
Hugs*
Nicole

I have no problem with giving up lots of info.

Driver's license, passport, university transcripts, records of prior employment, current bills, banks and brokerage statements (with amounts and social security numbers blanked out of course), copies of personal revocable trust, pilot license and current medical certificate, vehicle titles, lease for my current apartment as well as my previous one, titles to vacation properties, birth certificate and even my childhood innoculation records are all things that I have here, in a safebox next to my desk, available for scanning at any time.  Not a problem sending any or all of it to the right person.

I could probably also arrange for somebody to speak with my attorney or stockbroker, if only to verify that they think I am a person of good character.  (Some employers ask to do this, so my attorney, broker and accountant are used to it.)

I guess maybe I should just stop worrying about what each provider says she wants, and just offer what I have, then see what happens?  I hate to waste everybody's time, but maybe I'm sweating over a problem that may not exist.

MisterG

If you are fortunate enough to be
A)Not working and
B) Have enough cash to be playing with the ladies
You should thank you lucky stars and deal with whatever screening is required. The rest of us should be so lucky!
All the suggestions put forth here are good. If you are diligent I am sure you can soon spend enogh money to put you back in the working world with the rest of us.

Rather, I am in the fortunate position of being able to choose what I work on and for whom, mostly doing short-term projects for former colleagues and associates.

That, combined with a generally modest lifestyle (no expensive house, no girlfriend, tend to travel coach, etc.) gives me a fair amount of freedom.

It probably won't last, as I'm getting kind of bored.  But I also haven't heard of a full-time job that I really want to do either.

MisterG