Females of our species are *hypergamous*. This means they are perfectly happy to mate with the best of possible men, and with everyone else they are settling.
Obviously, every woman has a different view of what would constitute the best of all possible men; and a hierarchy of values indicating where she would be willing to settle and where she would not.
An orgasm isn't going to override this.
Let me explain the difference.
In the real world, at least ideally and if she is psychologically healthy, a woman only consents to sex with a man she believes to be superior, or at least as superior as her own charms can find. Within THAT context, the bonding of an orgasm can work.
On the other hand, not to overly disparage my sex, but we generally have far fewer and lower criteria for what constitutes a suitable sex partner. In fact, we will often choose as sex partners women that we would categorically exclude as mate material. Nevertheless, in general, any woman with whom we have sex is someone we find attractive.
THEN, there is a differential in knowledge between hobbyists and providers.
The hobbyist knows only what the provider chooses to convey. The hobbyist generally does not see the REAL woman. Rather, he sees an idealized version of a woman in a sliver of time where she puts forth her absolute best. He sees her in a time and place outside the real world calculated to present an illusion of her being an ideal or near-ideal mate.
He is not aware of her multiple criminal convictions and hard time for felonies, or the way she joyfully took her first husband to the cleaners out of sheer spite, had kids and abandoned them to the state, or the fact that her house is such a mess you wouldn't even want to eat take-out there. (I am not saying all providers have these sorts of issues. But some certainly do. I am using extremes for illustration.) The hobbyist is not aware that, were he to marry her, he would get laid about once every six months, that she would aggravate him endlessly about asking for directions when she can't even point north, and that she would make his life a living hell. He is not aware that she may have adopted a specific female-supremacist world view likely incompatible with his happiness; or has become so hyper-materialistic that she feels all that matters is money and she'll ditch him for the first richer guy to come along.
He sees NONE of this. Rather, he sees the idealized version. (There ARE exceptions. There are definitely providers where other than the name, you see the real woman. But let's face it -- with most hobbying oriented toward men finding a fungible warm hole in which to explode; many hobbyists either don't find such providers or don't recognize them when they see them. Such providers also adapt and are different with men who recognize them than with men who don't.)
So combine bonding chemicals with an idealized mate; and you are cooking with gas. For men.
But what does the provider see?
She doesn't get an idealized version of the hobbyist. Depending on how thoroughly she screens, she can discover everything from the public records of his prior divorces, the value of his property, etc. Most importantly, she will know that he is paying women for sex, which women he has paid for sex, and whether or not he is cheating on a spouse.
Believe it or not, in many cases, the mere fact that a man pays for sex or has EVER paid for sex absolutely disqualifies him as mate material in the eyes of a huge preponderance of women generally, and even many providers. And if he is cheating on a spouse? Sorry -- even though the provider may be the instrument of such cheating, she is not about to consider a guy of whose infidelity she is aware in lurid detail to be mate material.
So the provider is often quite aware of the worst that the hobbyist has to offer. All the orgasms on earth -- IF she actually has them which is usually doubtful -- will not overcome that.
So my point is that the man has an orgasm within the context (generally) of an environment and presentation of an ideal or near-ideal mate; and is usually unaware of any disqualifying factors. Whereas the woman has an orgasm within the context of knowing all the worst of the man, and quite clearly aware of any disqualifying factors.
An orgasm, in and of itself, is simply not that powerful.
then he can be the hottest, best lover you've ever had... but he will do NOTHING for you, because in your head, you're still thinking about what he did to make you mad, disrespected you boundaries, etc. I know also, a lot of women tend to multi-task... all the time(yes, our brains are constantly thinking about something..)... but for the guys who are respectful, sweet and are actually looking to make the time enjoyable for both... it will make us more "in-tune" with our sexual side, and you're experience may differ greatly from the next guy who was 15 min late, isn't very friendly, crosses lines, and seems to think this girl should have a great time with me just because I rubbed super hard on her clit for 5 min....