Today I learned that a gentleman whom I have been seeing for nearly a year has passed away. I know some say that hobbyists and providers can never really be friends, but he was my friend. I thought the world of him and loved his humor and wit. My heart is breaking knowing that I will never see him again, or share our jokes together.

He was just a guy, nothing spectacular. He wasn't famous, he wasn't in competition to make the cover of GQ, he wasn't rich. He was just nice, and funny, and wonderful, and kind and caring. He was a friend, and I will miss my friend.

You know what, I can relate.  I had a 82 yr old guy from Poland.  Who died last month.  My oldest client ever but a great friend.  He always had such great stories to tell.  I sent him a e-mail to check on him and got a response from his son-in-law.  Saying he passed.  SO SAD!  For 82 he was probably in better shape then me!  Until he passed.  Heidi

-- Modified on 11/7/2007 6:00:01 PM

You have my sympathies my dear. I know you are sad right now and I just want you to know how very sweet I think it is of you to share your feelings here with us.  We all move on eventually and I think we all hope to leave behind the kind of impression with even just one person that this man left with you. I'm sure he felt equally blessed to have known you.

A good person with a good and kind heart is much more important than money, looks or fame.  Thanks, even in the midst of your sadness, for giving us cause to think about that for a few minutes...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Sounds like you both shared together all of those essential things; kindness, caring and humour that make a relationship so meaningful.

I am so sorry for your loss...You are such a good person too, sins...xo

My sympathies go with you. I know from experience there are few people you can talk to about your feelings concerning this realm. I feel for you and hope you life was made better knowing such a kind person.

All is not not sins in shadows.

axail

I'm on hiatus right now from the hobby, but I most certainly will dive back in when finances stabilize.

I often think, if I died, or one of my ATF's died, I would never know.

You have my condolences Stacy. The same thing happened to a my ATF & she took it very hard. We are reminded all the time that this is a business but it hard not to develop feelings for good people. The Love Godess had some good comments on the Erotic Highway for times like this. Thanks for caring Stacy!

You lost a friend and that really hurts.

But please take some comfort from the fact the last year of his his was richer from spending time with you.

My best wishes to you xxx

It is good and proper that we all take the time to remember how precious life is and to savor these wonderful times, for all good things must pass eventually, so we must learn how to cherish the memories.

My condolences.  I have friends that I've met through my time here, and I've thought about what losing them would feel like, especially knowing that the classic grieving process would be inappropriate.  I'm sorry that you've now got the answer to that question.

Sorry for the loss Sins.  Hopefully in due time you will replace this sorrow with wonderful memories of the good times you had together.

aww,stacey
sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. it's tuff i know, but just reflect on all of the joy that you brought to him.
take care.

I truly commend you for posting this and sharing your feelings of lost. My deepest condolences!!!

I'm so sorry, hon, that you lost a friend. Losing people is never easy as I have lost so many these past two years.

But please remember that he will always be watching over you, laughing with you when you have an unusual client, giving his invivisible shoulder to you when you need to cry, gently carressing your hair and pulling it out of your face when you need to see things more clearly, and always standing by your side but you'll never see his footprints.

Take care, love!

Hugs & smooches,
Ciara

believe that provider and hobbiest cannot be friends.... They can.  Many of the ladies I know in this business are in it for reasons that are theirs and I cannot speak to their reasons... but of the ladies in this business they are like ladies everywhere.  They respond to kindness, respect and affection.  They can laugh and cry with the rest of humanity - just as I.  

I am sorry for your loss - You've said it best... and know that your friendship probably meant more to him than he could express.  And you probably made him very happy!

my thoughts and prayers are with you today.

Obviously, this gentleman meant a lot to you and its nice that our community has joined together to express their heartfelt sorrow.

dear Sin
I am so very sorry for the loss of a friend.  I know you have heard all of this before, but sometimes the more we hear it the more it gives comfort.  I am a newbie and live in an area that has no providers.  So 2 or 3 times a year I travel and I get to spend time with great ladies.  when one leave the business then am sad not because of our activities but because of the moments we shared laughter and talking while I know it is not the same we all understand loss.  I know there is suppose to be a barrier between provider and hobbiest but I can not seem to find it.  I enjoy the friendship I have had with the few that have chosen to see me.  It is people like you who make this hobby what it is.  Once again I morn the loss of your friend.  But I am glad you are who you are

how to handle this same issue.

My sincere condolences to you on your loss.
It is never easy to lose a friend.
But you will always have the memories, sometimes that's all we get.

I have often thought about this.
I have several ladies I know who I would want to now if something were to happen to me.
My question is how do you let them know if you are incapacitated, or worse?

One solution I have thought about is a sealed letter left with my lawyer with a list of phone numbers or email addresses of people to be notified in case of my demise.
I know, very impersonal, but I think there are a few ladies out there that might be interested to know.

Dear Sins, as you well know, we can, and do, form strong lasting fiendships in this hobby.
Even though it is difficult, true love, the non-sexual, emotional bond between people we call friendship, does grow in this rocky terrain.

I know, I am proof.
I have a few ladies I can call dear friends and one blond  beauty in particular, I consider a best friend.
She is my friend, she always will be. I feel blessed that I met her.
Even after the hobby has gone away, I know we will still be friends.

Again, Sin, I am very sorry for your loss.
I know how it is to lose a dear friend.

Just my opinion...
B



-- Modified on 11/7/2007 2:19:14 PM

A close friend who I have known for 18 years has such a list from me. He is discreet and reliable. I explained that the list is a few old friends who would otherwise not know and that I would appreciate his letting them know as a favor to me. The ladies in question know that the list exists and that the caller does not know any details of the relationship.

  I have assisted in handling a number of friends funerals. The lists of people to notify always cross many types of associations, friendships, business clients and colleagues, and so forth. Adding a few friends that a friend will call is unlikely to raise questions. And should my friend ever suspect or guess, he'll keep it to himself.

-J


-- Modified on 11/7/2007 2:20:02 PM

when I go I want my wife to say... "He was a great husband who loved his family with all he was and took care of us in all ways."

I want my business friends to say, " he was a great leader and he made a lot of people very happy and prosperous."

I want the escorts I see to say, "That guy was respectful, nice and clean.  But most of all he was loaded and generous with his money.  And he had a nice cock"

I'm sorry to hear of your loss.  It is always wonderful to make a new friend, and it is very sad to lose a good friend.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Runningman

I've gotten to know you a little and think I understand the depth of your feeling.  Maybe the only appropriate reaction was the picture of Iron Eyes Code in that 1970s commercial about littering--the stoic Indian with a single tear running down his cheek.

If you need a hug or anything else, you have a friend here.

I too am sorry to hear of your loss . Mr. Fisher could not have said what he said any better .

Life is shorter than we think & should not be taken for granted .

Big Hug to you
Layla

Thank you all so much for your kind thoughts.

I've spent a good part of today pondering the ironies and limitations of our mutual hobby. Ironic that though this is a 'business', it is a business like no other. We can't escape the constraints and barriers created by our shared risks, and by the monetary part of our business, and yet despite that, we are all still human, and subject the full range of human emotions when sharing an experience so intimate and personal. I can't say with any honesty that I make this same sort of connection with every man that I meet, but in truth, I do with many of them. Men like Jerry are why I love what I do so much.

I have thought alot about the limitations of our hobby as well. His funeral will be sometime within the next few days, and I wish so much that I could attend, but I don't dare. His friends and his family members will gather and share their memories of him and their tears as well. But here is where I can share my eulogy of a kind and wonderful man, who never lost his boyish smile or his love of a good joke, or for that matter a good political debate.

I've also spent alot of time thinking about the lives we touch and impact without ever appreciating the impression we have left behind. I wonder if he ever knew or guessed how much I valued and respected him. Maybe. Maybe not. But it makes me aware that none of us can ever really know how many lives will be just a bit dimmer without our presence.

Thank you all for listening, and for being a friend.

is that he knew just what a good friend you were.

This was a beautiful eulogy.
Frome the heart of a dear friend.
What more could he ask for.

And kow in your heart that he is around, keeping an eye on things.
You will see him in your daily life in many ways.
In the smile of a stranger, in the laugh of a child, he will be there and you will know.

Last of all, know that he will always be there in your memories.

I don't think any of us think we have any real influence on others, but, in reality, our presence and friendship means the world to someone.
I can only hope that, in my own special way, I have had that kind of influence on someone in my life.

You said it all, with beauty and class,in your post.

God bless you, Stacy.
I feel I can call you Stacy, because even though we don't know each other, we are friends.

Just my opinion...
B

the other night... one of my stripper friends told me that she loved my cock... as it was the "right size" and felt good.... I took it as a line... Until I overheard her talking with a friend of hers.... and knew that the complement was genuine...

While this is light hearted.... were providers to show-up at my funeral - I would consider that both a great honor, nothing to be ashamed of and a complement.....  It would make my friends smile.

I to am very sorry for your loss I went through the exact same thing a few months ago and it makes you realize clients are more than just a meal ticket they are as compasionate as we are to them.. It's hard but time does heal.  I actually went to the funeral and had to explain to a few people who i was and I just said I was a friend of his recent past brother. lol but what was I to say?

I am just normally (or just under) endowed.  5.75 inches erect.  yes I measured...  So I am able to have anal sex pretty easily with women.  which I enjoy.  I do not want a big cock.  but maybe that is because I don't have a big cock. like my wife doesn't want big tits.  she is happy with b cups.  but she does oogle women with big cans and calls them sluts.  so she probably wouldnt mind big ass tits. I would like her to be in some D cups.  

way ot, sorry.

I am sorry to hear that, too. Now I understand