I'm gonna be somewhat general here, but for my fellow hobbiers would you be offended if one of your regular providers lied to you and cancelled your session and you found out instead of visiting her sick mother (just kidding about the excuse) or taking care of a non-provider appointment, she saw another hobbier? I guess we all lie to each other in some respects, but what would you do?   Thanx.

"Offended" is not a word I would use to describe my reaction to such a situation.  The amount of fantasy or reality one sees in their relationship with a provider will determine how they will react to something like this. For example:

Fantasy: "Of all the guys she sees, I'm her favorite."

Reality: "Of all the guys she sees, at some point she will no doubt meet someone who is richer, smarter, better looking, funnier, etc., than me."

Considering the intimate nature of this business a certain amount of trust is not something that should be taken for granted.  However, it is a business and I can understand someone making a "business decision."

As far as I am concerned, lying is not something I have much patience with.  If I were in the situation you described, I would not see the provider again.  I would have no problem, however, with a provider saying "I have to cancel our appointment", with no further explaination.  But don't patronize me with a lame excuse.

BTW, how did you find out she canceled out on you to see someone else?  But that may be a whole different discussion.

I'm a retired business owner, and in my industry, some clients were perceived to be more important than others (they were bigger, more prestgious,etc.).  And there were times when an issue of this nature arose.  The first commandment of business is NEVER lie to a client.  It always comes back to haunt you.  Like it did for you.  She just should have said she had a scheduling conflict and needed to change your appointment.  A very common business practice.  This provider's actions certainly dictate that you would be within your rights to terminate your relationship with her.  And if you do, and if it's feasible, tell her why.  She may or may not care, but you got it off your chest if you do.

On the other hand, this "hobby" is both physical and emotional.  However misplaced her actions were, her motives may heve been more pure, like not wanting to hurt your feelings.  You, and only you, can decide which of these is correct.  If you can confront her with the facts as you know them, do so, and tell her either:

1.   Don't ever do this to me again.  If so you will lose a client.
                            OR

2.   Good-bye.

By the way, I'll ask the same questions a 2k1:  How did you find out?

to her.

I might be more forgiving that others on this issue.

In general, I will not mention it to her.  If she was not doing well in this business lately or if I was just an infrequent regular (visit once a month or less), I would just let it go.  If I was a frequent regular (visit twice or more a month), I would be upset; I would probably reduce my visits to once a month.  If there was a mutual understanding that it would be hard for me to reschedule the appointment in the near future (1 or 2 weeks), I would be mad and probably wouldn’t come back for a few months.

If I was a frequent regular, had given her tips and gifts from time to time (in other words, a very good regular), I would be extremely angry.  I would confront her with the knowledge and most likely would not see her again.  I would treat it as a betrayal of my kindness and generosity and I would not tolerate that at all.

I agree with fortitude.  I have sometimes had to reschedule one client appointment to help another client.  I usually tell the second client that I will see them if I can reschedule the first client.  Very seldom have I had a problem with juggling the schedule.  It is all about integrity.  There is no reason a lady can't operate her business with integrity.

Truth is, I would appreciate the cancellation for any reason; if she's not going to show, she should let you know.  A no-show without explanation would be unforgivable.

I once contacted a provider the week before, exchanged info and set an appt.  I called her the day before our appt, and she told me how much she was looking forward to seeing me and that she didn't forget, but when the time came she was unreachable and didn't show.  

I would have rather had forewarning even if it was some lameass excuse I didn't have a chance of believing.  Or even just a last minute, "Sorry, something came up and I won't be there."  I will never, ever reschedule with her for that reason.  With any explanation, even a flat-out lie, I would consider seeing her, but after treatment like that...?  No way.

Turbo,

Like some of the other hobbiers, not knowing all of the details the insights I can offer are very general.

1/  Trust is an important thing in our hobby.  Once that is broken, it becomes rather difficult to repair.

2/  If the provider wanted to cancel, all she had to do was have the integrity to inform you accordingly.  It's common courtesy.  There is always a strong possibilty that if she did this once, she could always do it again.

3/  If you are a regular, and you get treated in an improper fashion -- obviously she doesn't think much of you.  

So, the long and short is, move on.  There plenty of beautiful vixens out there.  Do your homework, and find one that most appeals to you.

Offended? Not in the sense that others seem to be expressing...they seem to be taking it as a personal afront...again forgeting that money seperates sex from emotion (or at least it should).

I'd be PISSED, because it was rude and unprofessional and showed a lack of respect for my time, and that said provider clearly didn't understand the meaning of COMMITMENT. As in, when you make one, you keep it.

She'd never see another dime of my money. On the other hand, I am sure many guys would eagerly line up for another opportunitiy for her to display her contempt for them...

Oops, that one got away from me!

I know that I'd be pissed because of something that happened to me...

I had arranged for a weekend with my ATF and sent her an airline ticket.  We were to hook up at an airport and fly on to our weekend together then at the end fly back together as far as the connecting airport and then go home from there to our separate cities.  

She e-mailed me that she had re-arranged her return flight to go to another city where she would meet another client.  I assumed that she had taken advantage of the ticket $ to arrange to see another client, and I was very upset.  I wrote her that I would have gladly arranged for that in the first place had she requested.  I was sort of surprized at just how I felt.  In reality out of a whole weekend together it only took her away from me 1 1/2 hours of morning flight time on the return, but I was pissed just the same.

She told me that the other client had called her for a birthday gift to himself and the timing was tight if she went all the way home then back to him.  I believe that she has always been honest with me and after talking to her in person I felt like a real jerk.  But by that time she had re-done the flights on her own to be with me as far as we would have gone in the first place.

I still feel like a jerk, but now I know how I react at first blush.  BTW, we just spent a fantastic 5 days together at another location...she is HOT!

Over my hobbying life, two women have completely rocked my world. One is a somewhat well know Black porn star who lives less than 5 min from me, the other, while only doing FBSM, is probably one of the five best looking women, if not the best looking, in the trade. Can't get the time of day from either of them.

I respect myself too much to play that game when someone doesn't find me desirable as a client. You can't win them all, although there's no harm in trying. The message therein is obvious, and the solution equally obvious. To inquire as to why probably would be counterproductive. To deviate would suggest a larger personal problem and perhaps the provider was correct in declining your business in the first place.