To the "No Show Guy" that wasted my time today.: First of all your a Jerk and second of all, your a loser.  A jerk, because you probably go through life letting doors slam in other peoples faces, pulling out in traffic and changing lanes without a signal. I know you, oh, you may think your anonamous, but I know you. All of us, deal with your kind every day, we carry your ass because you cheat on your taxes, cut in line at the movies, or even sneak in for free. you cheat on long distance and fudge on your expense account. You feel, as Providers, we're "Just Whores" and our time means nothing, since we lie around and eat Bon Bons all day...Well honey, I've got a news flash for you...You have no idea what you missed...I didn't get the 9's and 10's on my reviews being lazy...You are the loser, because, if I have my way, you will never know what my silky soft skin feels like or my hot mouth and wet tongue on your cock...and it serves you right, you don't deserve me, or anyone like me.  I don't know about other Providers, but I spend a lot of time preparing for my appointments. The candles, music, and my body are all prepared for you. I offer an "experience", not just "a roll in the hay" and I work very hard to make sure that happens. Plus, I turned away two other Gentlemen, who could have appreciated that fact, for the likes of you. Your lack of consideration, has cost me time and money, both of which are in short supply these days for us all. So while you go about your business, without another thought of me, just remember, Bad Karma comes back to you, ten-fold, when your hurt others, so beware....You will get yours and "Pay-backs a Bitch"..!!!

You're clearly an angry woman.  If I was in your city, I don't think I'd want to see you after your angry message.

I know exactly what you mean.  I had the same experience the other day where I made an advance appointment with a popular provider in my area and even confirmed it an hour before the appointment and she is a no show. I canceled all my appointments and missed lunch waiting for nothing.  It was a bummer!

I guess you're the only provider who ever had a no-show. Of course, we hobbyists have never been stood up.

Grow up - it goes with the territory. It's called life, deal with it.

Look on the bright side, maybe he was in a horrible accident.

Hey Mr. Puck, maybe this has happened more than once to her! I was close to a provider for years, she was top notch, perfect girl & had many no shows thru the years or last minute cancellations (we call them chickening out!). Do you think it bothered her also? Well, it did. Some guys are dicks. Plain & simple. This guy was a dick & by the way, a little dick (he has for sure)!

.

everyone gets stood up and it really sucks but this post is way out of line.

and you don't see me crying.

Zorro,

I was just wondering how you knew the picture was that of a client doing her?  I don't see any cash or an envelope visible.  Do you recognize the guy from the photo?

Enquiring minds want to know......

-- Modified on 4/25/2003 6:52:31 PM

Thankfully, I've only had a few no-shows.

When it's happened, it's definitely frustrating, but the first thing I try to do to get over my annoyance is to go shopping in my unexpected free time--that always gives me a lift!

Then I send a brief non-accusatory email telling him it's too bad we missed our connection at X time.

If he never replies, you know he's pretty rude and you can just write him off; if he replies back with an apology, we go ahead and make another appointment.

My last no-show had a legitimate excuse and was very apologetic--he even offered to pay me for my time.

Sorry that happened to you, but don't take it too hard.  That shit's inevitable and tomorrow's another day.

I still love you!  

Well Mr. Zorro, I must have struck a cord, so I'm sure you and Mr. no-show are cut from the same cloth....Since you continue to go to TJ, you do all the San Diego providers a favor, I'm sure...By the way...The BB Anal was my SO and isn't on my menu, but nothing I do would be on the menu for you...So don't bother reading my posts or going to my website....Just scroll on by... Robyn,aka. Silky

Reon't hold back, Robyn. Tell us how you really feel!

Sorry all of you that feel I was to hard on this guy, but this was the second time for this person...But the last...!!!  Consideration is one of the things I feel very strongly about. Obviously it's not a big deal to most of you, which  tells me all I need to know...Maybe my venting just hit a little close to home for you Hobbyist's....But, you won't be calling me and I won't be seeing any of you....So we have no problem...RIGHT....??
Hugs & Kisses, Robyn,aka. Silky

Sure, Having my time wasted twice by this guy, does make me angry...Guess I sound a little like you in your review of your "Two Girl Special"...When someone wastes your time, it doesn't feel very good does it..? Or maybe you feel as PUCK, that as a Hobbyist, your time is more valuable than a Provider..? When a Provider rants about having their time wasted, their out of line, but as in the latter thread, it's OK if we rant about you all not washing your ass...Guess you feel we need to stick with what you want us to focus on, your body parts and we have no right to feel upset when we're treated like shit... well Clamlick (a name says volumes, doesnt it..?)I too am glad I won't be seeing you...

Its a normal human emotion and when blocked can be manifested as Depression or physical illnesses such as cancer.

When a man expresses anger, no one says "You sound angry" or "You sound like an angry man." as to belittle.  So please spare us your judgment.  If men weren't a bit hostile towards women in general, you all wouldn't be seeing providers so don't call us names.

As for her anger, it is well deserved and you would be angry too if in her shoes.  If she wasn't angry, she'd be a doormat.

I do understand what your saying and I believe I'm always, very understanding when something comes up and I do call or email them with my conserns that something bad may have happened. My frustration was more with the fact that he promised me that his past no-show was an unfortunate over-site on his part and pleaded with me to fit him in, since he doesn't get this way all that often. I then proceeded to change another appointment to a later time and also had another client call me, who I had to turn away. The Jerk wanted  fish-net thigh-highs, (I had ruined my last pair two days ago) so I drove all over to find them(no small feat, in this area.)I'm not a Bitch and anyone who really knows me will tell you, I cater to my clients...All I ask is for is simply a little consideration...

some slack.  No shows demonstrate a lack of consideration whether it is a client no show or a provider no show.  IMHO it is just the number of no shows that cause the ladies to get upset about this issue more often than the men.  

For example if a lady has 250 dates per year and has a 10% no show rate that is 25 no shows per year.  If a hobbyist has 20 dates per year and has a provider no show rate of 10% that is 2 no shows per year.  The hobbyists in the example although irritated when a no show occurs only deals with it twice a year.  The provider in the example see it often enough that it eventually may make her very angry.  

The above numbers are just being used as an example.  If a hobbyist is constantly seeing new unreviewed ladies his rates may be far greater than 10% and if he is only seeing a couple of well reviewed regulars he may not have any no shows.  Providers may see lower no show rates if most of their clients are regulars and if they have a lot of screening information on their clients.  If they only have a few regulars and book appointments without screening they may have higher no show rates. JMHO.

Hi Natasha, I never knew that blocked anger could cause cancer.  Can you point me in the direction of some literature on the subject?  I find that to be very interesting and I'd like to learn more.  I have to take exception with your statement "If men weren't hostile towards women in general, you all wouldn't be seeing providers so don't call us names".  Are you actually saying you believe that ALL men who see providers are hostile towards women?  Best wishes, and have a nice day!  Sedagive.

"If men weren't a bit hostile towards women in general, you all wouldn't be seeing providers"

Are you kidding me?  I've never seen anyone on any board suggest that this hobby stems from some inner hostility men harbor towards women--let alone do it in a hobby-focused forum.  Are there any providers on this board that honestly think that hostility towards women is the motivation for men to participate in this business?  I've treated EVERY provider I've ever seen like a true friend, and value the experiences I've had way too much to let this kind of bunk go unanswered.  This comment stinks at its very core.

This sentence says nothing about men.  It says everything about your attitude towards men and how you feel about providers too.

"If men weren't a bit hostile towards women in general, you all wouldn't be seeing providers so don't call us names."

Remember this next time you are waxing poetic about YOUR ATF and how she is different...remember this woman is SOMEBODY's ATF.

You pay for companionship. You have a good time. And hopefully the companion of your choice has a good time as well. But when you forget the nature of the relationship...or why / how the person you are doing business with decided to get into this business or why / how they decide to do business with you...well...we have plenty of threads regularly of guys who get burned emotionally and / or financially.

Bottomline...more than likely "she" is in it for the money. You are one of DOZENS of guys, conservatively speaking who provide her with same. To think you are somehow special...for whatever reason, be it perceived or based on what she told you...is somewhat foolish. If YOU are in it for anything more than the "companionship"...buddy...you in for some hurt sooner or later.

Having dated ASPs before, I can tell you a good number, if not most, share Natasha sentiments. They don't think highly of their clients of all. Your "ATF" might not feel the same way...but should you be taking a chance with your heart and money betting she doesn't?

I wonder if Natasha will have the guts to express her thoughts about men in another post under the name she does business. I think her potential clients should know how she REALLY feels...

" I guess you're the only provider who ever had a no-show. Of course, we hobbyists have never been stood up."

Please explain how this means that I value my time more highly than that of a provider.

Your rant, and I can't characterize it any other way, is of a kind with most postings I've seen from you and strike me as the work of one who is singularly self-absorbed. This guy stands you up, and from that you glean that he's a tax cheat, cuts in line, steals from his employer - did you forget about the candy he steals from children or how he screws his dog every night? He was wrong to stand you up - send him an email instead of pouring your vitriol on this group. He deserves it, I don't. All you've done is show potential clients a nasty side of yourself that I, for one, never want to see in person.

I suggest you read the post about hygiene one more time - it wasn't a rant, it was a public service, assuming that the offending individuals were unaware of their problem. Had it been written in the same vein as your rant she would have accused him of not wiping his ass for a week just so he could bury her nose in it.

You're not the center of my universe, just your own. Perhaps you should take over moderation of all these boards so that you can correct us all and prevent the dissemination of wrong-headed opinions. I'm sure we'd be better people for it.

Every business is plagued by the human element - people who fail to keep their word in one way or another. Light a candle instead of cursing the darkness, and be grateful for those who keep their promises. I'd guess they're a clear majority. Save your rants for your friends, I don't enjoy seeing them. Like it or not, you're in the business of giving pleasure, and when I'm the one paying I expect my pleasure to be more important than yours. If you want your feelings and comfort to be more important than mine, open your wallet.

Let's face it. Nobody like to be stood up. But, it happens and we have to live with it. Move on. Also, some people feel a need to vent on this board. Again, most of us don't like it. But again, it happens. So, let's just move on.

It always makes me wonder what's happened in your lives to make people so darned cynical in general! I have deliberately fought against becoming this type of person in my own life... why doesn't anyone else make the effort?

I do not believe that men "are hostile" towards women and that's why they come to see me. Frankly I can smell a mysoginist about a mile away and they never walk through my door. I have no desire to come within a mile radius of a sick phuck like that!

I also don't believe that all of us ladies are "all about the money," any moreso than any of you men who go to work each day and LOVE your jobs are. I know there are men out there who love their work but their perception would change if asked to do it free... we all want to get paid for our special and unique talents and skills and there is nothing wrong with that and no need to take such a cynical view!

WOW!!!
Grumpy people

Nicole

I get your point Stumpy but I`d much rather sit waiting in my comfortable living room than in some God forsaken neighborhood an hours drive away.

this case?

Yeah, do cut her some slack. She isn't simply complaining about all no-shows. Seems like this guy was a repeat offender.

I once had an appointment with Robyn that I had to break not too long before I was supposed to be there (I had a morning that went way downhill in a hurry), but I at least called and told her a bit before--just a hour or so, so it wasn't soon enough not to inconvenience her--but she was polite about it. I later saw her on another date.

No shows either way are PITA (I won't digress into a discussion of bareback anal here to say that showing up can be too), but the person does it repeatedly deserves to get flamed. Too bad we don't know who he is, since that would help other providers.

There is another element.. That is time. And time is money. To the hobbyist who gets stood up, he is not out a financial loss.
But to the provider it is a significant opportunity cost. Not only does she not get the money from the hobbyist who stood her up by potentially lost business from the client she did not see because she was booked. Another factor why more and more providers are unwilling to take on first timers.

Seriously though I think a good rant should be allowed from time to time, don't we all need to let off a bit of steam now and again.

It's probably not a good idea to put pics of you doing bareback anal on your website if you don't do anal.  I doubt anybody will be calling the BBB though.  It's definitely not a good idea to do bareback anal unless you are committedly monogomous.
There's a saying that all publicity is good publicity.  That doesn't hold true in a service industry.  Your multiple hate-filled insulting posts might give some people the impression that you're a mean self-absorbed bitch (undeservedly so, I'm sure).  You'll just pigeonhole yourself into the specialized niche of men who get off on being treated like shit.  If you do go the dominatrix route, you'll want to find a more suitable name.  Silky doesn't convey the whole "On your knees, scum!" attitude these guys are looking for.
I understand the need to vent, but you would be better served doing so on a providers-only board, where you can let the other providers in your area who this guy is.
p.s. Don't worry.  I won't call.

I'll take you comments with that in mind....Self absorbed..??? PM ANY of my regular clients.. Let them tell you who comes first in our sessions.  As far as my "Rant", it wasn't just for me, but for Hobbyists, Providers and no-show clients. Yes, we all deal with this type of behavior daily and what our job is, has very little to do with whether or not it upsets us when people feel they can waste our time.    

-- Modified on 4/27/2003 7:47:42 AM

I personally have yet to meet a provider who didn't confess at some point in our conversation that "circumstances forced" them into the hobby...which doesn't mean they didn't enjoy it. It means that money was their motivation.

You are right...virtually all of us would feel differently about how we make a living if we weren't making a living doing it. The difference is, most of us don't make a living selling a "fantasy" to others.

Now, by itself, there is nothing wrong with that. That is what I am paying for.

The problem becomes when EITHER party forgets the unspoken bounderies. Hobbyist forgets that this is a "fantasy" that he paid for...and nothing more than a fantasy. Provider forgets that she has a moral obligation to be friendly, but remain professional...

The difference however between providers and plumbers is that when a plumber takes advantage of someone, they are typically only out of their money. They aren't left emotionally damaged, their lives aren't potentially ruined.

Since the stakes are much higher, only a fool would not be cautious. If that makes me cynical or "grumpy"...so be it. I can live with that...I'm not one of those guys posting about how broken hearted they are (or just plain broke) thanks to the deceptions of a provider. This doesn't make providers anymore decetiful than plumbers (though, yeah, if you were to ask me, I'd say that the higher than general population occurance of things like drug use amongest ASPs probably means the likelyhood for deceit is higher as well...that is why we have a special desgination for "ripoffs"...because it ain't all that rare), it just means that the results are more damaging.

Bottomline, I don't have anything against a woman who wants to make her living as an ASP. To each their own. I'm smart enough to realize that many (not most) providers take advantage of foolhardy men. For every story that is posted here, I am sure their are 100 that never see the light of day, because the guy in question can't believe what an idiot he was.

Cynicism in moderation is sometimes well placed...

-- Modified on 4/27/2003 8:46:39 AM

I will most happily pass by your posts in the future.  Be strong, be confident, but don't be a bitch and expect my support.

If Robyn weren't so self absorbed she might be struck by the irony of her last post: "Since none of you know me......"

Hey Robyn - you don't know us either, sugar - but you sure don't have any difficulty running us down.

'Scuse me - I have to go cut in line at the movies now.

If you don't like her attitude, avoid her at all cost.  Thankfully, this post gives a fairly accurate indication of what that attitude is like.

Yes, Robyn, I have met you and have no intention of doing so again.  The use of an alias and lack of a review, with ratings well below a 9 or 10, are for my own reasons.  Physically, our meeting was actually above what I was expecting but the attitude definitely killed the experience.

It seems your rant served two purposes.  I assume you felt better after typing it and it also allowed those who were considering a meeting a taste of your nature.

Robyn, I think that you have every right to be as angry as you are.  Perhaps this no-show was just the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak.  I know that being stood up can be an aggravating and frustrating ordeal, but it happens to all of us all the time.  It's just something that you have to brush off.

Although we've never met in person, I have had the pleasure of speaking with you on the phone on several occasions..... I don't think that you are the type to just fly off the handle for no reason nor do I think that you're the type to be this abrasive.  I can understand your anger and the spirit of what you're saying, but I don't understand the attitude in which it was said.

IMHO, slamming hobbyists that you've never met based on their participation in this thread wasn't very conducive to a discussion.  If you read the replies, none of the people who responded including me had anything to say against your being angry because you got stood up... in other words, it wasn't what you said, it was how you said it.  

I happen to have had the awesome opportunity of spending an evening with TripNatl and he's an awesome person.... not the womanizer you make him out to be.  And I am a strong, confident woman.... you should know that from our conversations.  

I don't know about the rest of the hobbyists that you mentioned because I've never met them.... I'm just saying that we providers don't like being stereotyped by society for what we do, so we shouldn't be sterotyping anyone else as a womanizer or mysogenist.

Just my .02.

Hugs,
Jaclyn

Wow, this thread is unbelievable to me. For those who defended Robyn...I don't think Puck and other guys are saying she has no right to be angry. We all get upset and frustrated with our job from time to time, but there is a time and place for everything. You certainly don't come on here and belittle the guy. Sure, the guy deserves it, but what does that accomplish for Robyn? Absolutely nothing.

I thought Robyn would cool down with time, and just let the thread die. I am surprised she continue to come on here to antagonize people. I have never met Robyn, and I cannot tell you what kind of person she has. But I can only go by what I read here, and any reasonable and rational guy who has never met her before will not want to meet her now. Robyn can be ignorant and continue to be in denial all she wants, but this is not good practice business wise. Even if she is turning away clients now, we will see if she keeps getting calls if she keeps this up.

I'd like to echo what others have said. You could be angry, but save it for your friends and families. Posting this thread accomplishes absolutely nothing, at least nothing positive for Robyn. If I rant and rave at work every time I feel someone does me wrong, I wouldn't last long at my work.

Yes, the guy is wrong, but Robyn has lowered herself to even below this guy's level. That, to me, is pretty sad.

"When a man expresses anger, no one says "You sound angry" or "You sound like an angry man." as to belittle. "

??????!

Where do you get this stuff ? Men are accused of having problems with anger or hostility, especially when it's directed toward women, all the time. Don't you ever watch Lifetime (oops. Am i promoting a stereotype? Sorry)?

It's not uncommon for a man to vent on this board when he has been ripped off or stood up. Some posters express sympathy. But most advise the guy to chill out and move on.

Do you think you can just set up a false double standard like that and get away with it?

Silky is no fan of mine, but I understand that in this line of "work" there is no one really to vent at. We as providers often live secluded lives and can not share our joys or woes with some of the people closet to us. Chat boards sometimes fill that void. A few weeks ago Silky was the darling of the boards here. Give her a break. We all could use one *PS as for the whole anal thing? That is part of her paysite and has nothing to do her with anger post.

Now do you understand why people told you to stop posting?

I doubt it. You've dug yourself into a hole that will be hard to climb out of.

My original intent in posting was to vent(rant) about a subject we all could relate to. It has since turned into a thread of meaness and hatred.  I never meant to insult or misjudge anyone. If I have done that, I am truly sorry. Some of you added food for thought, while many, true to form, came out to feed, not surprisingly, the same people, day after day, sadly,  that situation on this board never changes.  Peace, Robyn

I addressed, was the idea that men have to be hostile towards women, to come see providers... a bunch of nonsense if I've ever heard it... on the same lines as "all women are degraded by facials." Please!

Rally the bottom line is not what you keep trying to stomp into us "Many providers are bad," the bottom line is that in this world, unfortunately, many PEOPLE are bad. Bad people are bad people period, irregardless of their profession!

As for stories that don't get posted, do you really NEED me to say that I'm sure there are just as many stories of the reverse scenario? How many girls did that guy in Arizona MURDER, btw??? YIKES!

Bad people, are bad people!

Sincerely,
Nicole

I understood your intent and it bugs me too to see people overreact to a simple rant.

Take care... remember, karma will come back to all those gents who stand us up

Nicole

you are all powerful and all knowing...What a man you must be....I can only dream I'm sure....LOL

Even though I have never met you before, but I like your honesty. Please be who you are and say what you think.

I thank you Sweet Man...even though your a Newbee, I know you'll do well in this hobby...We Providers are softies when it comes to gentle, caring men, so don't you ever change either...Kisses & Licks, Robyn

and some of them do come true

but Robyn, please don't get blue

if it doesn't work for you.

No, I'm not all powerful and all knowing, just damn sexy and handsome and funny too.

Wow. First of all, I reread my post, and I don't see where I questioned Robyn's right to be angry at being stood up. I agree with her, and I think that sort of behavior is totally unacceptable. Unfortunately many people seem to regard it as unremarkable, so naturally it will continue to be perpetrated, by escorts and clients alike.

What I don't agree with is the notion that men are allowed to vent their anger and women aren't. A woman might be called a "bitch", but men are called "pricks" and "assholes". Quite a bit, actually. The idea that a man who frequently complains or loses his temper is tolerated or even admired for being forthright is quite foreign to me. I don't know here it comes from. In my workplace there are a few supervisors, all male, who are well known for yelling at their subordinates. Believe me, no one admires them for that. Any admiration is in spite of their tempers, not because of it.

It's my experience that men are more apt to lose their tempers than women. Is that your experience as well? If that's true, I think the question is whether it arises from male aggression or from a bias in society toward men. I don't believe it's the latter. Men are much more likely than women to commit murder. Would you then conclude that when a man commits murder, nobody says anything, but when a woman commits murder....

Yes, women who lose their tempers are often called names. Just like men who lose their tempers. You've come a long way, baby...

cardinal



-- Modified on 4/28/2003 6:56:32 PM

-- Modified on 4/28/2003 7:01:26 PM

While not disagreeing with your general premise....there is a subtle difference.

Robyn is "bitching" amongest a forum of potential customers about a customer. Male or female, no matter what the industry, that is considered bad form.

I might go to my mechanic and bitch about the last guy who worked on my car. Fairly par for the course actually.

If I go to a new mechanic and he starts bitching about his customers, I am gonna be concerned.

It isn't necessarily a gender thing...not to discount your point (which I think is valid in the world at large)...just pointing out that I think it was the customer / provider relationship that caused the concern here...not the genders of the pro / antagonists....

As I stated before.....My intent was not just to vent about "This ONE Client" but to express something that I felt would be shared by the majority of individuals on this board, whether Hobbyist, Provider, or the clerk at the AMPM.  From the PM's I recieved, no one had a problem understanding that, other than the same general few here, for, I BELIEVE, just the very reasons I have posted previously. There are a few that "Come Out, Only At Feeding Time", like clock-work on this board, and you all know who they are. I think both Nichole's "Get it"...but, trying to explain it to those who never will is like slamming your head into a brick wall, to move it.!!! As far as alienating potential clients, it didn't happen. I've actually gotten appointments because of this post. Plus after reading the reviews of the ones that were actually honest enough to flame without an alias, There were no potential clients to be lost. As I stated before, it was never my intent to be hurtful to anyone, but merely to spark some remorse in those that are inconciderate of others and validation for my feelings, from those who can relate. Nothing more, nothing less....Peace, Robyn

Come out only at feeding time? Please, enlighten us - point out the posts that came close to yours (and your responses) in terms of personal attacks and downright snide meanness.

You are the one who doesn't get it, Robyn. Your little rant was deserved by only one person I can think of and the odds of him having read it are likely slim and none. Instead you spew your venom on us. You didn't intend to be hurtful? Your intent was to spark remorse? Who do you think you are that you can lecture the masses with your bile and not be called to task?

Feel free to read my reviews - the ladies I see (and I emphasize the word ladies) are fine human beings with sensitivity, tact, kindness and warmth - right down to the sub lady I saw in Chicago, though I would never expect the likes of you to understand that. I wouldn't sully myself with a self-righteous martinet who deems herself fit to lecture the general population over the transgressions of the few.

You're way out of line.

"Puck is a mental pygmy, and dealing with him is like dealing with a cement wall." Anyone remember this post....?? I, for one, couldn't agree more....I won't dignify his ignorance with a response.