TER General Board

ghosted
brokeloser123 1386 reads
posted
1 / 34

so a number of people on my other thread about review culture rightfully pointed out that i have no reviews so i am essentially that guy that pays the door charge at the strip club but sits and gawks without tipping or buying any dances….bottomline, i will participate in “review culture” when i have something to review! lol

well, therr is a good reason for that. i am a transparent guy. i have no reviews because i have not seen any providers. i have not seen any providers beacause i have been ghosted by all of them. Six total so far.

i selected reputable reviewed providers who charged between 700-1000 per hour. i sent short concose texts or emails with introduction, meeting date, time and length, and a statement i am ready to be screened. none had any special requirements on how to reach out other than “text or email.”  

so a few theories i have might have:

1. prejudice - i am asian and make it clear in my intial email. i know providers are big on ethnicity so i always make sure to include it. this one may be a lower probability as the chance of all six being prejudiced is pretty low.

2. income - i am a regular dude with a regular job, jist with tons of disposable income because i budget well and invest everything. i am also single. i am technically a millionnaire. but they may screen my name and decide they want someone making a higher income.

3. legit busy with other clients that want longer dates. i am cool with that.

4. i use a clean “hobby phone” and proton email which may show up as suspicious online with no history. my real name is tied to the  phone number.

any suggestions would be nice

mr5mike 7 Reviews 50 reads
posted
2 / 34
hehitshewins 48 reads
posted
3 / 34

It could be just bad luck. From your list, unless they ask, I would not share that your Asian. Most well reviewed providers in that price range don't care about your race. In fact, sharing that detail unpromted might be a turn off.

 
I fit into number two. I have had no issues. They care if I can pay. They do not care about the money I have that is not being used to pay them.

 
As for number 3, that shouldn't be a reason to ghost you. That, if anything, would be a reason to reschedule. But this rarely has happened with me. Most legit providers honor that we booked and will try to tell the newer requester they are not available and find another time.

 
I don't see an issue with number 4. Sometimes providers don't like Google or Ap phone numbers. But if you have a phone tied to your real name with a real phone number, that should be fine.

 
I'm thinking it's either what you're saying in your messages or who you are contacting that is the issue. Keep trying. YOu should find someone.

 
Oh, and don't let the trolls who demand you can only participate if you have reviews get to you.

Pollenbroker 24 Reviews 57 reads
posted
4 / 34

There is another theory:  the providers you have chosen aren't responsive.  It doesn't matter why, and in my experience has nothing to do with you  - they're just not responsive.  

I'm a typical old white guy with enough money and a history of reviews.  I usually pick 4 - 6 providers to query before making a date.  It's not unusual for me to get no responses.  And then I pick 4 -6 more and try again until I get a hit.  

See the related discussion about response times from providers.  This will tell you that your experience is not unusual.

brokeloser123 48 reads
posted
5 / 34

already addressed that.  

i did not mention this place in any initial contact and the email i used does not match username here. two of them i texted with my full real name.

cks175 51 Reviews 51 reads
posted
6 / 34

If I remember correctly, you had opened a thread about your search for your first provider. You had a very peculiar set of expectations for the providers and also ignored lots of good advice from the contributors to this forum.

Why don’t you just reach out to a provider with recent reviews?

QueenBia See my TER Reviews 61 reads
posted
7 / 34

If you read the providers website entirely prior to reaching out with the contact details & 🆔 in hand with a selfie 🤳 why would any reputable providers ghost you?

I call bullshit. Share the 6 providers who are in question. Sharing is caring. I block time wasters. Zero tolerance policy for people who reach out with none of the information I require on my website to consider anyone. If you’re not including details in the initial email that the provider requires that’s the problem.

3869730 14 Reviews 73 reads
posted
8 / 34

…well, sort of. I’ve been cancelled on day-of and then haven’t heard anything when I’ve tried to reconnect.

My style is to be as forthcoming as possible. I provide everything for screening in my first message, along with an introduction of myself. I try to indicate in some way that I’ve read her ad or her website. I also haven’t shied away from deposits, and I’ve never tried to make a last minute appointment. So far that’s worked for me.

Hopefully I can suggest this here, but perhaps you join Preferred411? It’s a trusted verification platform where you can request appointments. You can add your ethnicity and everything to your profile so a provider can see before choosing to confirm an appointment. I’ve been on there less than a month, but I’ve found it very helpful. I regret not joining it sooner.

For what it’s worth, a few providers I’ve written have either not written me back or have been quite rude to me. None of them are on P411, if that tells you anything.

Also, don’t let people bully you.

RespectfulRobert 53 reads
posted
9 / 34

How long has it been since the girls ghosted you? Days? Weeks? I am asking bc many times over the years I reached out to a girl only for her to get back me weeks, sometimes months, later as she was on vacay or bc it went to spam. I am guessing you will say you softly followed them all up 2-3 days after your initial outreach?
.
You may just have hit some bad luck/bad timing. As PB said, that happens to everyone at times. If you want, pm me and I can do a deeper dive for you to see what may be the issue but from the sound of it, you are doing everything right. Just keep at it. Good luck!

hehitshewins 51 reads
posted
10 / 34

I'm surprised a man who does research as well as you seem to do before booking laides has had many reach out weeks and sometimes months later.

 
I've had a lady a couple of times where they reached out a week or two later. Anything longer than that would be never reaching out, which has happened more often than the week or two delay. Mind you, when I say more often, it's also not a lot. But it happens.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 51 reads
posted
11 / 34

First off do not think you have to have reviews to post on here, that is hogwash. There are yahooligans that post every freakin day and have not posted a review in YEARS. Nuff said.  
I only communicate via email and have no issues with a proton email. Some gals will have an issue with the burner phone, not a concern of mine. I do not screen for income, I screen for safety. I do respond to every message I get but some gals do not. Maybe prejudice? I guess to put it in crass terms it may depend on what "flavor" of Asian you are. Unfortunately we are just going to be speculating without seeing the messages you are sending or the gals you are trying to communicate with.

brokeloser123 71 reads
posted
12 / 34

Got one to respond. Appointment set.  

For the person who told me to keep my introduction brief. Thanks. That might have done it.

She even apologized for taking so long to respond because she was on the phone and didn't see my text.  

(her response time is five minutes)

coeur-de-lion 400 Reviews 55 reads
posted
13 / 34

What is the ethnicity of the providers you are trying to see?

Meena Valero See my TER Reviews 68 reads
posted
14 / 34

Did you include any "activities" in your initial message?

If you did, that could be the reason for not getting any response from ladies. Including certain activities within a message about booking creates an exchange of money for specific acts scenario, That is generally a big no no

If you did that, then you should stop doing that.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 50 reads
posted
15 / 34

Thanks for pointing that out Meena!! Do NOT ask for anything sexual or explicit in the message. "I don't want to waste my money not knowing the services she provides".  
Hogwash. There are several states now that soliciting prostitution is a felony. THAT is what should scare the shit out of you, not the fact that she will only give you a BJ with a condom.  
If you say anything explicit many gals will block you and not respond. The entire landscape of sex work has changed and we as a community need to stay up on the changes to keep everyone safe.  

xoxo
Scarlet

GeorgeSpelviniii 280 Reviews 59 reads
posted
16 / 34

I know better than not to ask. That's why I prefer to see women with reviews.  I want to know going in if she is GFE or not.  I understand the thrill of the chase when you see a good-looking women, and on occasion I break my rule and see non-reviewed ladies.  But that is also because I live in an area that has very few good quality Providers.  I usually have to drive 2 1/2 hours one way to Tampa or Orlando for my fun.    I read way too many reviews about the Mongers' bad experience because they jumped into the deep end without looking.  

 
Do your research, find a lady you'll like and your fun bucks will go a lot longer to giving you enjoyment.  TOFTT is usually not a lot of fun.

RespectfulRobert 55 reads
posted
17 / 34

It is far from an exact science and certain things are just out of my control. Sometimes ladies dont post on socials that they are on hiatus and prior to Twitter, and p4p girl using it, it was a bigger crapshoot. And emails do go to spam.  
.
But "many" was probably a poor word choice on my part, but it does happen multiple times per year and I have been doing this for quite sometime, so it adds up. Good catch.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 51 reads
posted
18 / 34

Excellent way to approach this industry. Do your research. I unfortunately just had a prospective client that I had to turn down for an appointment. Appointment was booked in 2 or 3 messages and then he asked if I took special requests. I do, and when guys ask this it is usually I wear my hair a certain way, I have one guy that always wants me to wear jeans and a tee shirt, some like red toe nails, etc. This guy sent me a bullet point response of the 10 different sexual things he wanted to accomplish in our 60 min appointment. Ug. He had sent me his screening and very unlikely he was a cop but I just could not take the chance. Nothing he asked for was a service that I do not provide, but all I am thinking is WHY? He even said he had read my reviews and that is why he reached out. Small head unfortunately led him to a big fat no and disappointment.    :(

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 51 reads
posted
19 / 34

I'm a little bit confused, you turned him down because the list of things was too specific, or it was unachievable?

 
Or was it so unusual and off from other clients that you felt something was off?

Meena Valero See my TER Reviews 63 reads
posted
21 / 34

I have one unfortunate gent who has contacted me many times, and in every message he says he wants to "make love".

I appreciate his enthusiasm, but this approach will not produce his desired result.

holystonethedeck 104 Reviews 47 reads
posted
22 / 34

He obviously asked for specific sex acts. That's a red flag foriat women, but I'm sure you know that already.

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 53 reads
posted
23 / 34

Oh, got it.

It's a bit different in agency world hence I didn't realize at first.

How do you discuss pricing for specific acts then? Like do you have to speak in code or do you have prepackaged deals like in fast food places so you just call for a #3?  

I'm not being facetious either. I never thought about this.

Typically agencies send me something like this and I pick and choose and tell em.

-- Modified on 5/31/2025 5:09:52 PM

gameami 1 Reviews 58 reads
posted
24 / 34

Maybe it would be a good idea to get onto a local board and ask for recommendations for a newbie-friendly provider.  

Also a hint:  If the provider includes an onlyfans in their profile, chances are good she does not see anyone and is just using the provider ad to promoter her onlyfans.

holystonethedeck 104 Reviews 45 reads
posted
25 / 34

I've never discussed anything like this before meeting. Any woman worth her salt will have all of that info on their website or in their ad. SOME will say "contact me for rates". Then I'd send a generic email just saying something like "your ad says to contact you for rate info so I'm reaching out".  

 
But the vast majority of the women I've met don't up charge for anything. A few upcharge for Greek but I'm not interested in that activity so I wouldn't be inquiring about it.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 54 reads
posted
26 / 34

Jesus Christ Q. No. Just no. And this right here is why these stupid Asian agencies will continue to be super easy targets for LE. Do you not see me posting about this ALL the time? Please do NOT call me for bail money when you get caught up in this nonsense. And yes, it will happen. Best of luck in life. You will need it.

36363jensen 4 Reviews 45 reads
posted
27 / 34

And it's not even a good comparison as it's not some potential customers sending that to the agency when they are trying to get screened.  

 
Pretty sure that all but a few of the Chinese agencies in my area would simply ignore (different from ghosting IMO) a request to be screen that include the info rocket points to -- and the one's that wouldn't don't seem to really screen at all.

coeur-de-lion 400 Reviews 45 reads
posted
28 / 34

CAN call you for bail money if he is regularly sending you customers.  Lol

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 66 reads
posted
29 / 34

Come on, relax. It was just a genuine question. The few indies I have seen had all the rates outlined on their websites, but I know not everyone does this.

 
So I was wondering if a client has some desires of something specific, maybe from kinky realm, how does he go about it?

hehitshewins 44 reads
posted
30 / 34

Some indy ladies I have seen only will do GFE packages with new customers. But once they have seen you, they open their menus because the best screening is having gone through with a booking. There is a difference between a rando and a repeat customer.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 47 reads
posted
31 / 34

I am really unsure if you are being purposely obtuse here. Isn't that what YOU have said time and time again what reviews are for? Also I have stated multiple times that YMMV and they are dependent on multiple factors, hygiene being the #1 with the majority of sex workers. I am not promising jack in an email message. I need to see you in person and get a good look and smell before things proceed.

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 48 reads
posted
32 / 34

I'm not lol.

I'm genuinely interested. Okay lets put it this way. Do you discuss these things after the initial appointment
?

As far as reviews, I don't think you get complete info from them.

For example, many providers write that they're open to fetish or light sm.

However this is broad terms and something that can be very ymmv and needs to be discussed in terms of what the provider is willing to do and pricing....  

 
Maybe you don't do it on the very first date, but lets say everything is OK with the customer.

WIMissScarlet See my TER Reviews 55 reads
posted
33 / 34

1. Yes, I will discuss things during and after the initial appointment but I always ask that they be done in person.  
2. I have no clue nor do I care what other providers write in their ads.  
3. I do not upsell and all of my prices are listed on my website.  I do not piecemeal, I find that tacky and low brow, although that looks to be something you are used to.  
And to be honest from your questions it seems as though you do not understand the difference between what is illegal (asking for a specific sex act for a certain amount of $$) and that which is legal. BDSM is legal as long as nothing sexual is discussed. Bondage, spanking, degradation, cross dressing, electro shock, wax, etc. are all perfectly legal to discuss. Once genitals or sexual gratification are discussed you are crossing the line. Massage varies by state, but in my state of Wisconsin it is illegal to perform a massage for payment without a license hence why I no longer advertise this service in my ads.

team_rocket_qwerty 35 Reviews 53 reads
posted
34 / 34

Appreciate it.  

I actually learned something. I mean it.

Oh and big agree with #3. The upsells that are happening now  are driving lots of folks in my neck of woods insane.

Register Now!