-- Modified on 10/4/2010 10:19:54 PM

badbemeUnfortunately I got bored one day and googled her phone number. That's how I ended up here and on a few more sites"Now I'm not against the hobby but I wasn't up for dating a full service provider."

Lets look at this together analytically.If you are single and aren't willing to date a provider for free,there is  no logic in paying for one.
You might as well leave.Nothing for you here.
Oh wait.. there are some  bonding groups on TER,  where you might find male comradery, that just might be, your cup of tea.
Don't worry about telling her the truth about why you left her. I have no doubts she has already forgotten you, or you woke up from your dream.

My advice:  In a couple of months (to preserve your anonymity,) I think you should send her an anonymous note, saying that you are "a harmless, well-intentioned person."  Tell her that you accidentally discovered that her personal life and provider life are linked through her phone number.  Tell her that she should consider getting a separate phone number for "work."  Tell her that you don't want to see her get burned, just so she won't worry, when she gets your warning.

she probably doesn't even remember your name. you give her way too much credit for having feelings of a human nature.

Yeah.....She Could Have Just Told Ya....

No offense to any girls here, but I never date and not at some point tell my guy or girl(yes im totally bi) what I do!!!! The truth actually helps people, whether you want to tell it or not....It should be the other persons option whether or not they can except the life...not yours to lie and decide for them....You were right for dumping her sweetheart, but if you cared for her in any way would have been ok for you talk to her about it!!!!

I believe that when you break up with a woman and there is a definitive reason why, you should tell her what it is.

The reason is because many people have numerous insecurities about their human value; and letting her know that it was simply her occupation rather than some other problem could prevent her from feeling undo angst. It can also keep her from trying to rebound on you for a second try when nothing has changed and also keep her from the personally embarassing thing that sometimes happens when you break up with a woman in which she cries about how she'll "change anything."

The fact that she is an escort does not mean she is any different from any other woman emotionally; and she should be treated with the same level of kindness as any other woman.

Just like many women would not want to date a man engaged in certain legal occupations (e.g. soldiers, police) or illegal occupations (loan shark, gigolo); men likewise have similar preferences. I believe it is important to let her know that the objection is to dating a woman with an illegal occupation or as a non-exclusive sex partner rather than an indictment of her moral validity as a person. This would simultaneously be both gentle and final; allowing her to move on more quickly.

when she has you tied up, immobilized and naked in spreadeagled bondage, then just casually tell her why you broke up with her

she'll probably be comfortable with that

It's not gonna change how you feel, so maybe best to take the high road sorry you had to find out that way.

Thanks for the advice. I tried asking in other places but it seems those outside of the lifestyle won't give a serious response.

I'm going to tell her about what I found and suggest she gets a 2nd phone with trackphone or some other card based service so that it won't leave a record to her. I'll also suggest she edit or delete what she can to limit her exposure. Over all she's a pretty cool chic and I wouldn't want this coming back to bite her. If anyone else has suggestions I'll check back for another day and see.

Thanks again and good luck to you all.