with a woman involved in an open relationship.

A few of my friends have had unconventional marriages. I never heard them admit any problems, but one of those marriages is over, and I haven't seen another couple together in years.

...I can't speak from experience but I feel that it's difficult enough to have a relationship with an SO with no extraneous demands (assuming we're both being monogamous). Having to comfort your wife when she breaks up with her boyfriend is a bit much for me to wrap my head around.

I have been perfectly fine with dating hookers who I know are having sex all day long with other guys, but for some reason I don't find the physical act of having sex "cheating" as much as I do having a relationship with a woman who has "feelings" for another man. I could never see myself in anything more serious that a "fuck buddy" with a woman who was "dating" other men.  

outside relationship with a provider, its somewhat of an open relationship because of the nature of her work.  I deal with it just fine, but I think if it were to rise to the commitment level of Marriage, it would be harder for me to deal with, although I have heard that some do it successfully.  

The poly folks that I know personally never admit having relationship problems. Maybe they just don't feel like talking to me about it, or maybe they get tired of people automatically assuming that their relationship problems are the result of their unusual relationships. Or maybe denial is a necessary element in making such a relationship work.

I'm with you. I could care less if my hypothetical husband/SO fucked hookers, but no way I could handle the messiness of multiple "relationships". Sounds messy and never seems to work, IMHO.

This makes total fucking sense.

And what your overlooking if you think they are sounding like it easy is the amount of work it sounds like they put into making their relationship strong.  

but after we had been dating a while and  were pretty solidly a couple she stopped doing dinner and overnight dates with clients and I stopped seeing other hookers. Oh, and she stopped having "flirty conversations" with customers in between sessions.  The only exception to this was when she had to tour. She worked for an agency and sometimes she was required to do at least some touring and during these periods I saw other women, as I wasn't about to suffer from blue balls while my GF was fucking six guys a day. lol

Ha, not surprised. The ladies I've met in this industry are some of the most jealous and suspicious when it comes to their personal relationships. To each their own. I imagine I'd have a problem with an SO hiring ladies for overnights or extended engagements ( unless I got to join in too, haha). Otherwise? Keep it to hookers and not civilians, don't lie about it, don't do anything stupid like bbfs, and we're good.  

I would think that the ladies after a certain amount of time and dealing with a certain number of cheating guys, all of whom have managed to justify why they are cheating on the woman they profess to love, it would make sense that they/you would start looking at all guys as cheaters.

Okay that- the being suspicious- I get. I wouldn't trust any SO if they swore to be monogamous, ESPECIALLY not if I was still in this business. Seems a bit hypocritical. I just don't get how women in this business can fail to understand that for men, sex is a basic human need, not something they can take or leave like many women can.  

I've been polyamorous (I noticed someone used the term "polygamous" and that's a VERY different thing )  for the past 4 and half years and I would never go back to being monogamous. I love the freedom, honesty, and communication that comes with being poly.  

then you know that's a lie.   Every relationship has problems - that's not the issue.   It's whether the people are willing and able to work on them.  This is what makes a relationship strong or, lacking the former. causes it to fail.

There are two stages of relationships -- stage one involves fucking, stage two involves financial entanglements.  You can have all of one, all of the other, or some mix of the two.  Each has its own areas of caution.  However, of the two, the second stage, financial entanglements, has the most emotional risk if non-monogamous.

And for looking appropriate to Society.

The interview explains how she and her man are dealing with the various complications.

Adultery is one of the more common grounds accepted for divorce.

Marriage should be ABOLISHED.
or,
there could be TERM MARRIAGES  
where they would have to be renewed yearly.

Good point about the financial entanglements. One of my uncles lived in a commune in the late '70s, where he met his wife. Shortly before the wedding, I visited the commune a couple of times and talked to various people living there. People at the commune shared everything, including spouses. Well, everything except for vehicles.

If two people choose to spend their lives together, raise children, merge their lives together, who are you (or me) to stand in their way?

Sure.
There is a part of me that knows that Without MARRIAGE,
I would not be enjoying the nice life I have now.
I thank all the wives, every day, for not giving their husbands blowjobs.

-- Modified on 6/8/2017 4:15:18 AM

For example, my new wife was a provider, so she is totally OK with me seeing providers as long as I offer her my undivided attention for what matters most to her.   Since we live 1,500 miles apart, it makes sense that we should develop sexual lives outside of our own.

My life is greatly enhanced by my marriage. If I would find myself single again I would seek out someone to share my life with. I would even be willing to do the whole monogamy thing. My wife and I was monogamous for the first six years of marriage and not once was I seriously tempted to cheat. I could do that again.

If people wanted to Stay-Together-Forever,  they could do it without Marriage.
Marriage was formed by Religious fucks who Need to Control the Genitals.

You sound about as close minded as those "Religious fucks" your so are quick to condemn. I will say marriage is not right for everyone. Many people in fact should never get married. It isn't in their makeup. I get this is true for you and there is nothing remotely wrong with that. . But the opposite is also true, for many the single life isn't for them, but like so many you openly condemn them and their choice of lifestyle. Each person is uque in what will bring them happiness long term.

but yeah, that was pretty well said. lol

I am more than happy for your Love Story.  YaaaY for You!!!!

Why yes I am. Thanks, for noticing. And people who refuse to take ownership of their lives earn a bit of ribbing as do those who think their life choices are the only correct one.

Scoed,    
Did I say that? No.
Scoed , you are typing on a HOOKER BOARD with  
HOOKERS wandering around.
What in the fuck did you expect?  
We see Mostly Married men.
_________________________________________
You're being a "Good Boy" now. That's nice.
Get your wife to convince me that my Conclusions about Marriage
are false and that I should really consider getting MARRIED,
instead of being a HOOKER.

And I never said you should consider getting married, quite the opposite in fact. Marriage life is clearly not for all, and going by your words, it isn't right for you. And the fact you recognize this is a great thing. I think it is great your self aware enough to know this about you. Many people lack awareness in who they are and are miserable as a result. Marriage is not for everyone, never remotely said it was.

Those little things matter a lot in any loving relationship. Good on ya for figuring it out. I sure as shit wish I had before my divorce.

Finding sex (including P4P) is easy. Finding someone who makes coming home feel good is harder. Way harder. As I find my need for sex waning a bit I find my need for compassion and care growing. It's what keeps me in touch with my ex. Even now I know she would be there if I need help. And I would do the same for her.

No .  
I said It should be ABOLISHED,  
so that  
My Choice In Life will Be LEGAL.
ALL women will be on a level playing field  
while using the vagina as they see fit.

I honestly love what I do and don't particularly feel the urge to stop. I have another career which doesn't offer me anywhere near the enjoyment that I get out this job. I've always kind of been very sexually open and it took me years to come to grips with who I am and what I love. For me, I see an open relationship as perfectly rational and justified in that if I'm enjoying having sex with a variety of different men then my boyfriend/husband should be able to do the same.  

I have spent YEARS laughing at, ridiculing, and just all around giving Droopy Dog a hard time about EVERYTHING, including his ability to use the written word.

People shared everything including spouses, but not vehicles? So what was with the not sharing of vehicles?

Marriage is BIG BUSINESS just  
like Cancer is BIG BUSINESS.

You want my choice of to be completely and formally put to an end not just made illegal. That is what "abolish" means. I don't see how that is better, in fact it is worse. Sadly I stand corrected.

When I want to I can do quite well at defending my point of view in spite of writing like a third grader? And have you ever noticed for the most part I don't mind being laughed at? I think it is one of my best qualities. You see I am like Droopy Dog the cartoon. He is far too serious at times, and while lacking humor he doesn't mind being laughed at. But make him mad and watch out he tends to win. I really like the nickname Droopy Dog. Thanks for it.

When sex gets all tangled up with the rest of the problems that are a part of life, then it's the sex that always suffers.

And I'm sure GaG will be happy to confirm.  It came to me after we spoke on the phone years ago and your voice reminded me of ol' Droopy.  We should talk again.  Even though I disagree with you at times, you are one of the good people here.  GaGa, asshole that he is, is another.  Just don't tell him I said it.

who have had an open relationship for the last 26 years and are still together and happy she's lived with another guy on and off, and he likes massage parlour girls, but while many of my other friends are divorced or have had many relationships in that amount of time, these two are still going strong. I honestly wish more people had the guts to be open and honest with each other from the outset of relationships rather than it drifting into lies and break ups.

and largely one between two people to commit to one another. All the rest of it is what various societies and their formal institutions have cooped from the basic concept. The idea behind marriage is that commitment to one another and something that tells others to stay away unless invited in.  

AWESOME post---your point is spot on!! (We're SUPPOSED to think this way, but because of societal brainwashing and programming we don't. I have hope things are slowly starting to change!!)