To be with an:

A deadly combo of all three.  

I'm going with the first one because the other two are pretty unlikely in my book.  
And yes, I've met her, number 1 that is.  

We've all heard about manipulative providers--I'm sure there are manipulative clients around also, but I can't imagine a provider who would be willing to say so.

Definitely go with 2 and 3 as a tie. Don't know how one could get to that love part but hey I'm sure it has happened and will happen again for some out there. I guess a very long-term consistent client/provider relationship? At least that I hope. For me, those two would suck. If married, has to be number 1, unless number 3 had some of number 1 included and then number 3 for realz. Ouch! Single status and I ain't sweating number 1 at all. I can be evil too. Easy as pie when an evil person confronts me! No problem. And it would be kind of hard to manipulate a Ghost! Just sayin 🌚

I've experienced all 3.
#1 is an expensive lesson
#2 is sweet and eventually ends
sometimes with an unpleasant email exchange
or in person, which sucks too.
#3 includes lovelies like the ignore button, calls
to lawyers, countless hours of advice from anyone
who might listen and eventually an unpleasant break up.
You might have a make up session a year or two down the  
road but either she will be vindictive or read you her rules.
It's never worth the return visit.
What I learned is #2 and 3 are best in civvie or SB land.
There the breakups require sensitivity and #3 becomes
of greater concern since she WILL know your ID and everything
else you wish she didn't know at breakup time.

I've had the unfortunate experience of meeting a couple of no.1s.

and why does the OP think of these things? I over-analyze and I sure don't.  

but there is nothing wrong per se with that, and I often become infatuated with some providers, and I would think vice versa, though one never really knows for sure.

In any case, it is a very nice condition and as long as neither party does anything stupid, quite benign.  It's a gift to be enjoyed, not feared.

The infatuation will often give way to a steady state of appreciation for each other, and that is how all my long standing associations turn out.  

Sometimes things don't work out, but it's no biggy, just a little sadness here and there.  We all survive those things, for the most part.

All people are manipulative to some degree, but when it crosses a certain threshold then I agree that can be hell.

My most hellacious moment with a provider came about during an overnight in a rather rambunctious resort town we were staying in.  She excused herself for a few hours to go out for some reason just prior to bedtime and then never came back until around dawn.  I didn't know if she had been murdered or ran off.  There was no answer on her cell phone.  I became obsessed with worry about her and pondered if I should have called LE and reported her missing, but what if she was partying with some people she knew in town (Which it did turn out to be the case.)  What then?

Not sure under what category that episode fell under.

And yes, she was very apologetic and I took her back.  I'm a big softy.



-- Modified on 5/25/2015 6:44:43 AM

Number 1 is worse for me. Number 1 is at least in the bounds of reality.  Evil and manipulative  - I figure it out, I walk away.  Evil can be a real problem.

That unnecessarily complicate and fucks up your life.

but for me the answer is clear.

It's number two. A woman I love.

Number one, evil/manipulative is easy, I just quit seeing her, easy.

Number three, a woman who loves me is almost as easy. If I don't share her feelings, and/or if she turns into a psycho bitch/ stalker, I also simply quit answering/returning her calls. Ironically, I have two chicas I just had to put on ignore in the last week. It's not fun, but not that hard to deal with if you put your foot down.

Number two, A woman you are in love with is not a problem you can ignore or run away from, I can't imagine the pain that guys who "fall for a provider and can't get up" go through. The feeling of impotency by having the woman you love not only not loving you in return, but fucking every guy in town with the price of admission is a form of pain that I don't ever want to experience.

As a matter of fact, it is perhaps the worst outcome I could possibly imagine for myself. Some people just should NOT be married. I am one of those people.

Any time I think about getting serious with a woman, hooker or otherwise, all I have to do is imagine fucking her and ONLY her for the rest of my entire life, and I am cured for months.

"stupid" certainly applies to you.

I suppose you are denying that love and/or manipulation NEVER happens in P4P? yeah right.

It is really simple, if I fall for someone, I can take care of it, nobody is involved.  In a very real sense, although I cannot control if I fall for someone, I can control how I react to it.  1 and 3 are unpredictable and out of my hands, I find that scary.  Mind you, I have never had to deal with a pro liking me, so it is moot, but I have had to do deal with it IRL and letting someone down is very hard, and given my nature, it has left me susceptible to 1 and major manipulation.  So yeah, if I had to choose one,  I will take 2 every single time, plus, like Mr. Fisher says, the infatuation is good, if properly controlled.  I don't fear liking someone, it actually reassures me that all systems are working properly and that I have not become too jaded.

and that's exactly what it cost me. Every penny.

I would do it again too. Best money I ever spent. These last twenty years have flown by and I wouldn't trade my life for anyone's. I can only imagine how miserable I would have been if I had stayed married because divorce would have wiped me out. It DID wipe me out, and I would still do it again in a fucking heartbeat.

But I can only speak for myself, maybe freedom is not as important to some of you, in which case your decision is probably the right one for you.

I agree. My first marriage cost me 40k to get out of. Men don't understand the "burn down the house" mentality that seems to come with divorce. But single life is a beautiful thing. I'll never, ever marry again and I have zero desire to date.  If I want the company,  and comfort,  of a beautiful woman, TER is just a few clicks of the keyboard.  

I "date" a lot of hookers. lol

Hookers make great GF's for a guy like me. They rarely have any hangups about sex, they usually make plenty of their own money, they really appreciate a guy who can understand what they do. What's not to like?

but yes, I do understand the desire to keep sex as just sex and only sex, with no emotions getting in the way. I do like the feelings you get with a "special woman" but being the pig I am, I like the freedom to move on the moment I start getting bored.

Garbage = Gambler

Once again I find myself skewered by your rapier like wit.

Por favor Senor Grumpy, tell me just how you come up with such witty remarks? Do you think you might be willing to take me under your wing so that maybe someday I can write even half as well as you? roflmfao