I've been involved in two. They even overlapped each other for a short time. The first one ended very badly. The second one ended..........well, LMAO even worse. ROFL

Has anyone had these types of affairs and had them end with soft kisses goodbye?

My first one ended when the girl attempted to 'slyly' ammend the arrangement. She wanted the remuneration to increase for 'inflationary' purposes. She wanted the gift-giving to become more and more frequent even without associated visits. Why must one or the other make a move to take advantage of the other? I understand that familiarity breeds contempt. I'm married, I know lol.

With the benefit of semi-exclusivity, why do people cut their own wrists? Cut the very nose off of their face?

The provider within the FIRST arrangement even went as far as to contact me, after I clearly said my good-bye's, to see if I was returning. NO BONE FOR YOU FIDO!!!!

This is not a post that I can wrap my brain around completely because the subject is one that I could not see myself engaging in.

I think of the hobby as a way to experience so many different ladies, their nationalities, there personalities, their look and on and on.

Spending time with one today then moving on to another tomorrow to me is what its all about. Its a feeling of freedom much like my bachelor years.

The Sugar Daddy relationship reminds me too much about how and why a successful married relationship did not work out for me.

I have a handful of ATF's but they are not narrowed down to one and probably never will be.

I think of this hobby and the ladies that I see as a light switch. I turn it on and I turn it off as I choose, it is never a constant.

-- Modified on 9/17/2010 8:50:27 AM

"they go bad when one of the parties needs MORE to continue to feel good about themselves. there is a quirk in some folks that makes them incapable of feeling good about themselves unless they can get the other person to jump through ever taller, narrower gauge, higher temperature flaming hoops."

Sounds like my soon to be ex wife!

Been seeing a provider every month or every other month for the past two years.  We had a falling out back in March this year and I haven't seen her since nor do I want to.  I thought we both had mutually ended it.  BUT she still contacts me almost every week to get back together.  This is despite all the ill feelings she supposedly has for me.

I can look at it two ways:  I'm such a stud that she can't get enough of, OR she realizes she lost a reliable source of income and wants to have it again.

I post this story because I just received another message from her today.  Like I said, I have ignored her since March, yet the pleadings to reconcile still keep coming.  Like you say, NO BONE FOR YOU!  ha ha ha ha!

of marriage and hobbying, but end up with the worst parts of each.

I've always been leary of that approach to things.

were you in a relationship or where you P4P?

thats should be a bumper sticker!

It was wonderful from beginning to end, but being a guy, my eye eventually stared to wander (even though she was a 10 on a scale of 1-8).  When she moved away, it was definitely time.  Our allowance actually decreased over time, as she was thinking our relationship was transitioning in to something more permanent, when (for me at least) it was not, nor could it ever had been.  She was 25 and I was in my mid 40's and despite our compatibility, the chronological difference would have presented way too many issues long term.  We still chat to this day.

they go bad when one of the parties needs MORE to continue to feel good about themselves. there is a quirk in some folks that makes them incapable of feeling good about themselves unless they can get the other person to jump through ever taller, narrower gauge, higher temperature flaming hoops. LOL!

i don't think there is anything special about the sugar-daddy relationship that way. that hoop can mean more money, more time together, or other life-style changes. and it happens on both sides of the gender gap.

with (perhaps only one or two exceptions?) all my dozens of arrangements (civy, pro, or pro-am) have ended with soft kisses goodbye and in one case a remarkable forget-me-not farewell BJ. but then i'm always clear about the deal, calm and clear about not renegotiating it when that is impractical, and thankful for the time spent to that point.

there is much more room for ugliness if both are inclined to get ugly and dramatic. but if one person insists on it, there is really nothing you can do.

bad endings are avoidable with adequate mutual respect. it makes life so much easier then.

When you use your wallet for bait, don't be shocked and surprised when you catch a fish that loves the wallet more than the hand that holds it.

You know, there DO exist on this earth women who have values such that they equate attributes other than wealth with a man's status and desireability.

I feel badly for both involved being the opperator I have decided 2 years ago... no GIFTing allowed no tips accepted. it also lets clients know we are not a upseller. Your better of setting the grounds in my opinion with the circumstances laid out on the table this is what i want for my money. A) your never dissapointed. B) when one of the Parties doesn't hold up their end of the deal... you can move on and not feel guilty... sugar babies are the worst!

you are willing to pony up lots of money this kind of relationships never work..

fortunately those of my exes who were at least civil about it accepted being reminded about not changing but maybe "changing along with" as a better basis for things.

i think that even in the workplace with nothing erotic going on that problems center around the need to change someone.

Sound like daddy needs two new sugarbabies.....my homegirl and I are Ebony and willing if your interested...

They get clingy....i've been in 2 myself the craziness was on the other shoe....one got clingy and knew I'm in school and he was married & might still be .... the other wanted to see me more but would try to get out of giving me money far too often.... I've heard of it ending well i've just never experienced it.

"Why must one or the other make a move to take advantage of the other?" Well like I said to another person on here playing devil's advocate WHY NOT? Men go for sb's for extra spice in their situation, younger lady, see her when he wants to and can kinda conform the relationship he wants to have since he has the money but the power of money goes to some folk's heads so for the man why not try to get more sex and play mind games and pay less. For the girl why not play mind games, have sex as little sex w/ him as possible and get as much as you can out of him for as long as you can. Not right but again just kinda playing devil's advocate.

I have been in one for 4 years, yes I did say 4. When we met it was for me, a way to get some passion back in my life. For her, a way to earn a few dollars. Our SD relationship is for 4 or 5 days at the end of every month when I go out of town for business. I am always checking myself to make sure I am still understanding the true nature of the relationship. Black and white....bullshit, there's a lot of gray in the emotions that go along with this kind of thing. I have pulled away twice over these four years because I just felt like I needed to check my feelings.  She always managed to get me back. Not by begging or seeming desperate, but by saying "I wish you were here, I'm hurting." I'm a true sucker for that stuff. I'm new to TER, I just found you folks a month ago. Maybe the reason I'm here is because I realize I can't be a  SD for ever and I'm looking for a soft pillow to fall on. Glad this topic was up so I could read YOUR opinions.