Maybe your fly was down...

Had an uncomfortable experience where I lined up behind a masseuse at a coffee shop.  I didn't sweat it at first because it had been months since I had seen her and who knows how many dudes she has worked on since...surely she had forgotten all about me.  When she turned around and saw me she had a look on her face like a bus was about to hit her.  I thought "holy s@#t girl, keep it together.  Not a big deal".  She walked over to where her guy friend was sitting and whispered excitedly to him, and he proceeded to check me out up and down with his s@#t-eating grin.  WTF...are you kidding me?  The funny thing about this is that she once specifically told me, apropos of nothing, that if she ever saw me in public she would pretend that she had I no idea who I was.  It gave me a weird feeling at the time, so how bizarre is that that it actually came to pass in this way.  The one thing I learned is that I am clearly alot more sensitive about my privacy than I had thought: I was extremely embarrassed by the whole thing.  Perhaps I should rethink my hobby...as much as I love a good RNT.  Anyone have any similar experiences?  I am bummed by the whole thing.

Cheers,

How do you know what she said to the guy?How is that being outted?Actually your story is hard to follow.

So assumedly she whispered excitedly to her male friend "Hey, see that guy? I gave him a handjob one time". Hehe interesting. Agreed that seems like a breach of privacy.

That said, I wouldn't mind an escort or whoever saying hi to me in public personally, but that bit talking to the guy seems a bit odd yes.

walked over there and said " believe we have met before, what is your name"?  See, being nervous fucking wreck is not an answer to any situation. Dude, you are in Coffee shop and you are liable to run into any one. Rest of the wolrd is busy with their own daily crap to worry about you.

some time ago i had a favorite lady with whom i thought i had some rapport. near the end of a particularly wonderful encounter she made the off hand remark: "i don't believe that you'd ever XYZ".

now XYZ was a pretty obnoxious thing. in fact a few guys (social and business competitors) had spread the rumor some years ago that i was into XYZ. but they overplayed it and it backfired on them. she intended it as a compliment and vote of trust. i took it that she had accidentally outed me to someone who knew the old story.

sure enough i read all of her reviews and found some that were in the same prose style as my old nemeses. a little poking and it was clear that among her clients and associates were these guys. they made some clumsy attempts to interfere with my current business. naturally things went even more sour quite quickly.

so it could be worse. you were subjected to a momentary embarrassment. i've had to deal with unpleasant surprises over a number of years. currently things are quiet. if they stay that way, i'll be quiet.

I'm trying to remember the movie where the guy and girl are angry at each other but meet in a public place (restaurant, I think). They are arguing heatedly in whispers ("Your fault!" "YOUR fault!!") but then start expressing loud non sequiturs to embarrass the other and put ideas in the heads of the other patrons.

(whisper, whisper, whisper ...)
HIM: $500!! THERE IS NO WAY I'M GOING TO PAY YOU $500 FOR SEX!

She had some good retorts, too. I'm picturing a Tom Hanks kind of guy who can pull off the drama-comedy. A little help?

are you judging me because I'm into xyz?!

i'm not going to write on the board exactly what it was. it is non erotic (at least for me), involves violence, injury, and no capacity for informed consent.

once, i saw xyz being done when i was young. it made me sick. it was an event that defined my insistence on nonviolence, equal consent, and general disrespect for authority.

the guy who did it went on to more of the same and eventually ran into someone who stopped him cold.