In the TER review below, that I did not write, a $500 deposit was swindled from a hobbyist.

My guess is there are two sides to this story and I would like to hear her side. That is only fair right? We dont determine who is in the wrong and who is in the right simply by their gender do we? One would hope not.  
For the sake of the argument, let's say that the reviewer was 100% accurate. That doesn't mean every provider is a rip off and therefore deposits should no longer be required.  
For me only, I take it  on a case by case basis and only send deposits to women with a great track record. Does that guarantee I won't ver get ripped off? Of course not but to see beautiful, well reviewed, professional women, you have to take some risk as this is a somewhat risky and certainly illegal business.  
If you don't ever want to risk a deposit, simple, just don't send one. For those that do know the risks,  and and can absorb the loss, they are free to make a different decision than yourself.

And the rest of us are free to call you a moron for making really dumb decisions, decisions like sending a hooker a deposit. lol

On a chat board with at least some freedom of speech thats a good thing, I think you would agree, even if you dont like my methods and how I play in the world at times.  
And shouldn't "dumb" be from the view of the individual? I dont think it is "dumb" to spend time with an incredible beauty who engages in providing fantasies and sexual relief. In some cases, I am asked to send a deposit, in others not. If I got burned by sending them I may reconsider but I am a believer in "if it aint broke dont fix it."  
You are a "Gambler" I assume? That means you take risks. Risks you obviously feel comfortable taking. I don't consider that "dumb" for I know nothing about you, your financial situation, how you process risk, etc. In that light, I take risks too but they are risks I can live with. You do you, and I'll do me. Reasonable, right Mr. Gambler? Lol

Respectfully, I don't know if the review is true or not.  

I will say NO!!
For today anyway. I'm tapped out.
You other guys do what you want.

I typically somewhat laugh at these threads as it's a bit of a dead horse discussion -- few are changing their personal perspectives but probably doesn't hurt much to revive them periodically as at least some of the new to TER are also probably new to P4P.

The hobby has many risks, one of them being a monetary risk on a number of levels.

If you don't want a gun, don't buy one. If you don't want an abortion, don't have one. If you don't want to pay a deposit, don't contact the providers that require one. Simple.

I contacted a provider on adultsearch.com, which I know is high risk.  [I think of it as a 21st century Craigslist]  Early in my text chat I was told  cash not accepted, only Zelle or Venmo.  It took me a few seconds to realize this was most likely a scam.  I dropped out of the conversation so I don't know for sure, but I think the idea was to pay in advance.  I cannot comprehend why anyone would do this but apparently some do?!?

If you think others shouldn't have a gun, you go and talk about it and be vocal when spreading awareness.

I've paid a deposit a total of 3 times to an unknown to me, but well reviewed escort.  

Both my doctor and my dentist have policies about paying for the visit if not notified 24 hours (or perhaps 1 business day) of a cancellation.

And your doctor/lawyer is pretty much never at risk of pocketing the money and bouncing.

... then we'd barely have any threads.

I agree! This is an illegal business without a customer service dept. With illegal transactions going on, if they don't want your business, you will get fucked over till you get the point and move on! Or, keep paying with nothing in return! They like that! There are other fish in the sea!  

all the reviews that are not saying the guy got ripped of by providers with deposit policies are lying?

Please note that I do not typically require deposits: I only ask for one if the person has a history of cancelling or when the client is booking a date longer than 3 hours.

You did so of your own free will fully knowing the risks. Just like I do, just like all of us who choose to with deposits. Not sure how this is any different than any risk taking that goes on in life. Skiing, bungie jumping, sky diving, etc all pose risk and yet people do them everyday.  
Again, if you don't want to take those risks, don't engage in those activities. For those that do, feel free. Live and let live I say. But to complain about what two consenting adults do privately is really quite odd, imho. Thank you for an enlightened and logic based post on the subject Debra, and for educating a few here on the realities of vanilla world deposits.

Sometimes the herd is right.

Sending a deposit within in my means will not. Terrible analogy, Gambler.  
Furthermore, I never called anyone a liar. Not even close. What I said  is that in my experience, there are two sides to every story and I wanted to hear her out first, nothing more. It is you apparently that don't want the facts in this case before coming to a conclusion, which is your prerogative of course.  
I don't view sending a deposit as "rewarding bad behavior" as it is not "bad" for a women to ask for one. I have never been burned by sending one and have been rewarded for meeting these women with amazing experiences. Not sure why this triggers you. Again, "you do you, I'll do me" kinda thing.
Sorry to further disappoint you, but I also don't subscribe to the "rules of the internet" as I don't follow herd mentality. I will judge each situation on its own merits so I don't need to be hemmed in by any silly "rules" but feel free to follow all those rules if you so choose. I won't tell you how to run your life.  
Have a great day and thanks for your take! Always open to differing opinions.

-- Modified on 6/14/2021 12:53:59 PM

Providers who require a deposit lose out on many hobbyists who refuse to pay a deposit.

A review site has never been, is not and never will be a vehicle for dispute resolution. About most it can be is spreading awareness stemming from mistakes. And there are a lot of actors trying to prevent spread of awareness.

And?

You had the state board to appeal to,did you not?  
They conducted an investigation, did they not?  

The guy you are "debating" hasn't seen a hooker in over a decade. You might as well be having a discussion with him about quantum physics.

and that is the only gripe I have with your position. You ALWAYS take the hookers side in these situations. That's hardly judging each situation on its own merits.

I'm sorry this happened to you. The effectiveness of some of these institutions can be debated, I agree.

The idea that something is justified because no one forces you to do it and you do it out of a free will, is quite laughable.  

Instead of guessing, you could just go to Google and you know, search it yourself?

First, this really a personal choice to make and not some clear if you pay a deposit you will lose you money. The particulars in the OP was that 9 presumably paid any deposit they needed to pay and had a good time and 1 did not. If someone had a 900 batting average with sessions that were good and then had a bad session would everyone be saying stop paying hookers? No. Most would say don't pay THAT hooker again but not make broad general statements about the choices they guy makes in the future.

"The particulars in the OP was that 9 presumably paid any deposit they needed to pay and had a good time and 1 did not"

If you had you would have seen me say I was NOT siding with anyone, that is, I was taking a neutral position, again, until I heard both sides. (see evidence below) So my example of me not ALWAYS taking the providers side would be in THIS very thread. So per you, that would make me more even handed than Rocket. I'll take it, lol.

Something tells me they know quite a bit more about it than you do. Many started out with no deposit required and now require them. What does that tell you?

-- Modified on 6/14/2021 4:31:29 PM

That they know how to make money for themselves better?

We really don't lose out though. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are a plethora of AMAZING clients (this is not a hobby, we are human beings) here on TER and yes, unfortunately we may just not be a match due to my policies and their boundaries. However, TER clients are not the end all be all and in 2021, I can't think of anyone who solely relies on TER for business. I'm not saying TER or their client users are a relic; however, the world (and the internet) is moving fast and not everyone sees TER as this "holy mecca" for our industry. That said, for every client that won't pay a deposit on TER, there's a client off of TER (or one who just lurks here) who will. How else would many of us still have a business? I digress.  

Hello @Barrycade

To add to what you have said, many men said women were crazy for leaving Ter for twitter and other forums. Do you see them come rushing back here? No. Thats because they tried something else out and it worked, so they stuck with it. Not sure why any man here would ever claim to know what's best for a provider and her business model. It is the height of arrogance often with some misogyny mixed in for good measure. Great post Laffy!

Pocketing a deposit and bouncing = good for provider, bad for monger.

The difference is if you pay a deposit to a hair stylist or botox person, tattooist, and they breach, if it’s worth your while you can take them to small claims court and sue for your money back or if you sent the deposit by card/PayPal, you can reverse the charges.  

Twitter allows a deep view into personality, which goes to compatibility which can make for a better session. Good for the client.  
I don't see women with "no profile" unless they are recommended by a trusted friend so not sure your point there.  
And women who make a habit of defrauding men out of their deposit aren't professionals and that's why we must do homework and our due diligence. I have given over a dozen deposits and never been burned. I only give them to women with a long track record of honesty and decency. I don't give them to women I cant verify. Really is quite simple.

No, I maintain there's some confusion. We were talking about client point of view, and then you stated that we shouldn't say anything because girls know better about making money than we do.

This particular situation doesn’t provide a valid argument in opposition to deposits.

First of all, I never called you any names. I suggest you do the same if you want to have a civil discussion.  

1angelinajones:  I am aware there have been many discussions about Deposits in the past.

A business model that excludes a significant number of "customers" is a bad business model.

Doesn't screening "minimize profits?" According to you, yes. Some things are more important than money e.g. a woman's safety. Many woman feel similarly about deposits. Demanding them cuts down their "no call no show" and last minute cancellation rate down to a small trickle. This cuts down on stress and makes their schedule that much firmer and secure. Then add in what Paige is saying about not losing money even when they have instituted the deposit policy and it really is a no brainer for some women. We don't have to like it but we can go to the ladies competition if we so choose. Lastly, please stop telling women what is best for them when you know nothing about their needs, their clientele and their comfort level. You are coming off as an ignoramus.

I used to require deposits for Travel dates, but only 3 guys paid them, so in the future, I will not require anyone to pay deposits.

These things are just examples. There are hundreds and hundreds of guys arrested and you can just search do these example online. It takes five seconds. I don't really see your point. You - clearly not familiar and not having done any research - assumed the number would be zero. The number is far greater. Don't switch goalposts here.  

Safety is more important than money, of course.

bless your heart... you really think the world revolves around you and your wants/needs.

anonymous stranger on the internet about how to run one's business is a good plan? Do you actually read what you write?

I would bet that the people who most strongly support deposits have vaginas.

Anyone who crusades for deposits has a vagina or is an ignoramus..... or in your case both....

And yet the risk is always on the client side.

Nice argument there, sir. Care to actually answer my question?

I will ask again, and this time I will also ask to pay attention to what I'm asking, especially the words "before a meeting even occurs".  

but guess what?  

First, let me preface that I give everyone chances to argue points. And I have nothing inherently against you.  

All my life I've been waiting to use the phrase "Lady Astor's horse" for laughs ... guess I have to keep waiting.

No, I am not whining about anything.

I don't give a shit about p&r board, because I don't like politics.  

You said you will fight for both sides and claim you're not biased

Many have gotten burned by guys who disputed the charges AFTER the session.

I don't like deposits but nevertheless can see the provider's point of view as well as the client's (mine.)  I'll never say never, though.  On a case by case basis.  The more well known the less risk, so that is a big factor.  I won't TOFTT though.  I think new girls starting out probably don't have the same power to demand deposits.
.
Similarly with reviews ... they can help a new entry into the  biz.  After a while of accumulating good reviews, though, further reviews become a potential liability -- just more chance to score a bad one.  I expect ladies who have established a good reputation would be the most likely to become anti-review just as a precautionary measure.

I don't view reviews as something whose primary purpose is to break someone in. Reviews are a way for customers to review the product (again, pls don't get mad at terminology. We can use "goods" or "service" or "product" interchangeably here) and show transparency between customer and product/good/service.  

Truthful. There has never been anyone on TER who can match his record for torturing the truth and manipulating language.

Well if your hairstylists or other legal occupations flakes than you can sue. and win...Good luck going to Court against an Escort over a Deposit. lol

"You said you will fight for both sides and claim you're not biased"

Huh? What did I claim as truth wit no facts? The facts that people get caught for impersonation scams and are prosecuted?  

Uh, I don't see the connection between your post and my point. I did not say anything until Laffy mentioned he fights equally for both sides. So then I expect his treatment of mongers and providers on this forum to match what he's saying.

Your obsession with GaG is embarrassing.  

I agree that you can have situations like the ones you're referring to. So it's not necessarily true.  

Rocket you get upset when people suggest you mostly whine about things here. This post is a rather good example of why that characterization is leveled at you.

I get it, you don't want to pay deposits, lots of providers are requiring them now.  Take posts like this to the private client only boards and if you don't know where they are...well, that speaks volumes.

I express my opinion, Jensen and I don't really care much what others on here classify it as. Unlike you and others, I don't really engage in argumentum ad populum.

Your p411 ad reads: "A deposit MAY BE required...." (The emphasis on "may be" is yours not mine.)

How about starting a thread about know it all clowns who always post about a topic being discussed before that are not worth discussing ever again?

I did not say that is the ONLY reason, and I did agree with the guy I quoted when he brought up his examples. However I can see how it came off and I'll definitely take the L here.  

I don't know about clowns or starting a separate thread, but I do notice a pattern here for what is considered beating a dead horse and what isn't. It's the topic that involve controversy or have some inherent conflict.  

team_rocket_qwerty:

Is hardly something that shuts down a discussion. For me it generally means one is expecting one of two things:
1) Something new be added to the ongoing theme
2) A form of reminder.

Because "insulting" people who are paying deposits which encourages more demands for deposits is most definitely my intent.  

36363jensen:

LOL -- regarding your closing shot.

If they aren't, what are they for?  

Now this is some real funny shit. I can think of a few who fits this bill. LMFAO.

"My words may inform and may persuade. They have no power to change anything."

I appreciate the shout out and the traffic to my website! I must say, after days of not being involved, you went to my P411 to figure out my policy. *winks*... "Barrycade"... I'm flattered!  

I really wasn't thinking of you when I wrote that but, yes, I know you like the image of being that asshole.

It's funny, I don't think I've ever seen you mention "crybaby whiny shit" when it's providers who complain when something is unfair, or toxic or whatnot. It's fairly convenient that only mongers are crybaby and whiners, but not providers.  

I honestly don't give a fuck what you think.

But someone keeps moving it to the top of the page, so I guess I should chime in.  

May I ask, why were you trying to ignore the thread initially?  

Tell you what. How about you fucking learning to read rather that asking me to "make a deal" about something I have already said multiple times about people making their own choices.

Ah yes, now for some reason I get blamed for what other people think and say.  

You are every bit as argumentative as Rocket. The proof of this is that just about every thread on the K-Girl board that falls off the right side of the page has YOU on it as well as he. The difference between you and him is that he OWNS his bias while you make all these weaselly, cunty remarks that imply you are simply being "objective" You and RR are as far from being objective as you can possibly be. I can't remember EVER seeing either one of you criticizing providers for undeniable bad behavior, but I see you defending white knight suckups all the time.

multiple times on this topic that I'm generally opposed to deposits, and wasn't sure if adding something again would be of any value over what I have said before, but with over 130 posts, its seems there is more interest this time than there usually is on this subject.

paigesavage:  

I never book any of those kind of dates so I will NEVER pay any kind of deposit ever, but unlike the spineless jellyfish who not only send deposits for a simple one hour session at the providers static incall location simply because she DEMANDS it, but who strongly urge other mongers to do the same just because it makes the hookers who like to make guys jump through hoops happy as well, what CDL has stated makes complete and total sense and is fair to BOTH sides, hookers and johns alike.

please show us where anyone made the claim you're taking such an exception to:
"but who strongly urge other mongers to do the same just because it makes the hookers who like to make guys jump through hoops happy as well,"

Again, you're using a sledgehammer instead of a scalpel with your words, love. Your initial public inquiry asked why I advocate for deposits despite there being a current caveat of my deposit/cancellation policy written in an intelligent way.  

If you HAVE to deposit then it should only be partial payment.  Last lady I saw was a mainstream adult star (it sucked) but I knew she wasn't gonna rip me off.  Asked for $100 deposit and the rest when I got to her room.  Had she flaked I'm out $100 but not the full fare of $500.  

I have two more exhibits to present to the jury in the case of Hobbyist v Deposits.

I'll just say that I give first consideration to gals who charge no deposit.