What's the deal with ashleymadison.com? It pops up all over the place. Presumably, it's false advertising. Your thoughts?

I met my friend through AM.  So it is legit.  HOWEVER...  you should understand your odds.  Within days I had HUNDREDS of replies.  Here are some tips if you are going to place an ad:

1.Do NOT send the gifts or upgrade your membership.  Neither gets you noticed.
2.Do NOT just send a request for her key.  That is an easy auto-delete.
3.Read her profile.  Most will give you a pretty good idea of what she wants the first contact to be.
4.Have your first contact include your key.  Do not just send a cock shot.  I love them but apparently some women are offended.
5.Use spellcheck.  The nonsensical crap was an easy delete.
6.Don't waste your time or money by responding to women who have specific limitations that do not include you.  I would not consider a man who was single, a smoker, submissive or under the age of 40.  Nothing you can say will change my mind about any of those things.
7.And even if it kills you - do not miss a first-time meeting.  She is "interviewing" several men and you will be immediately dropped.  
8.Be prepared that this is an emotional and physical relationship.  You need to email with her regularly, not just when you want to have sex.    
9. You are in charge of arranging the room and paying for it.  
10.Do not bash your SO.  A simple, "I cannot figure out why she doesn't want to have sex despite my having tried X, Y and Z" is sufficient.

I've often found an ad in the past without it giving a number or an email address.  Just strictly to keep in our mind.

I've read that some have used the company and wished they spent the money on providers.

Check the critique of AM from Maggie McNeill's  blog, The Honest Courtesan (see link).  Excerpt below:

"If you’re a woman Ashley Madison is just fine because ten seconds after you sign up the men will be all over you like white on rice.  But if you’re a guy it’s a total scam; you buy “credits” which are needed to do pretty much anything on the site (send a message, receive a message, start a chat, etc).  The agency employs a number of shills and/or robots which bombard male members with fake messages that cost credits to open, and sending messages to the fake “too good to be true” ads costs credits as well and goes nowhere."

My guy friends have talked a LOT about that site and banging bored MILFs and housewives.
But they're all very attractive and under 35.
One met a few figure competitors for sex after he met one girl and she basically passed him around/shared him with her girlfriends, for real.

I think that like most casual sex sites you have to bring something to the table more than an erection.

Women who are looking to cheat are usually like men in that they're looking for someone hot to fuck.

Unlike men who post profiles, no matter how a girl looks she's going to be inundated with responses.
If she's very attractive she's going to be picky, if she's average she's going to be picky, if she's below average she still may be picky but more responsive.

Having played the casual sex game online for kicks years ago, cock shots don't do it for women alone unless she's a pure size queen.  
Being reasonably attractive is very important and sounding fun, sexy and not lecherous is more important.  Women will always get a million responses, you have to make an effort to stand out and seem like a good reason for a girl to take a chance and meet you offline for sex.

I've often thought about the possibility of AM employing some to send the collect messages. I've been on there a couple of years, wound up with a couple of "friendships" that lasted several months. But yes, it is 97% BS, 3% real. And the real ones seem to be mostly nervous milfs that take a huge time investment. Actually, meeting a new one next week, after 3 weeks of email.......

I've also been on there looking for a girl-friend and at that point was treated like a guy. I bought $50 in credits and had to use them to send/read messages. I did not get bombarded with auto/fake emails.  However, I also did not meet anyone. But I think that is because I mentioned wanting someone who would join me in a threesome. Most women are nervous about being the 3rd wheel. Next time I will leave that part out.

Yes, we are nervous. Thought I would vomit the first time I met someone. But it's because there is a good chance this is the first time anyone other than her SO has seen her nude in years. And if there have been children since that time, well now she is ready to be physically ill.

The whole business model is predicated on getting male members to spend money.

No easier to do that than to float some girls who are bogus but will have us thinking with the little head.

Was a lot of work however. If your just looking to fuck, then stick with providers. You don't have to be an emotional crutch. And the only thing they care about is what's in the envelope. It's a lot more honest.

Meant it as my looking for an attached woman who is looking to play.  

You can't measure things just in dollars (although with civie sex, the dollars are there, they often don't show up for a while.)

Considering how much nicer it is to keep everything fair and square with a fair donation and no baggage is a big relief.

This is why I stay away from these dating sites.

Why would they go to a provider if that's what they really wanted?

LR maybe it's time to rethink going out on a civie. Tunnel vision happens to all.

-- Modified on 11/30/2012 2:01:56 PM

This might be the best response I've seen to any post in a while. Too much work, if you want to have fun with no emotional bullshit and no needing to pretend to care about how her day went just stick with providers. It's a lot more honest is exactly right, you know their motivation and it's in the envelope. Good providers will make you feel like they're your girlfriend for however long the appointment is for. I see a lot of posts on here that reference the thrill of the chase, well if that's for you have at it. Personally, I like knowing I'm going to get what I want and I don't have to contend with listening to the bullshit or having to play the silly games.

The statistics are there and people date these days on the internet. I heard somewhere 1 in 5 relationships start with the internet. Totally believable. I am not even going to look for the source. It is nothing to turn your nose up at. It can be sleazy. So can going to a bar! Probably wherever you find your plenty of dick. Keep an open mind. There is absolutely nothing wrong with online dating.

That site is for cheating. Why would you go into a website like that looking to make a connection? If you are already attached aren't you possibly compromising your marriage/attachment by getting emotionally involved with someone? I have been on sites like that before just for sex and only sex. No emotional stuff, just dick. Seems it works better that way.

I did not turn my nose up at anything, but as I said it is not for ME. If you think cruising the net for strange men to fk for free is fun, more power to ya. I don't cruise bars either, but couldn't care less what anyone else wants to do.  Does not mean every other person on the planet has to follow suit though.  I don't use female condoms or swallow either....and? Oh, and your 1 in 5 dating stat came from the freaking match.com commercial that plays 10 times a day.

Ashley Madison is NOT a dating site...it is a cheesy way to have an affair without paying for it, and with no discretion either. Know plenty who use match.com and eharmony who have had much success, but again not my thing.


-- Modified on 11/30/2012 11:59:58 PM

what do they do if they knock up a random married woman?  The husband will kick their ass, and their own wife will divorce them.