Ladies, I was curious as to how you handle obtaining/dealing with the donation. Do you always collect it up front and make sure all the donation amount is there? Do you trust your client enough where he leaves an envelope or the amount on a table nearby?  Have you ever been shorted after you trusted he'd leave the said amount?

I'm curious to hear your answers. Most men in my experience immediately put it upfront for me discreetly in an envelope on the table or counter in my room. Occasionally though, I have collected it afterwards and never had any problems with the amount. And in all my working years only been ripped off a few times. I don't like 'counting the money' in front of a client as I think that's tacky so I just wait til he gets into the shower or uses the restroom to be sure the proper amount is there. One time, my bad, the guy left six one dollar bills in the envelope instead of hundreds, and after that was when I started to count discreetly before the guy left.


What about when you are booked for an extended trip or days that required a lot of money? Do you request a 50% down payment up front?

As I am not on the provider board, I find your post very helpful. I often wonder about this. Back in CA I would receive money in my account in anticipation of our engagement, but I had known these men for years. This is a little different. I also feel awkward counting the money up front, but am aware of the stories of shorting. Was the man who shorted you someone from here or somewhere you could follow up? Did you bother following up or just chalk it up to experience?

I chalked it up to experience and now I always count the money when he's 'indisposed' LOL in the restroom. Yes, I am not on the provider board either which is why I asked on the general forum. I was told I had to wait and be more established here again before being qualified to join.


The man who shorted me was from another state, actually, and no, there wasn't anyway to follow up unfortunately except to write a report for various provider boards.

dont ever count in front, no.....just fgo in bathroom, n count, i d makwe sure some guys  mis read stuff n bring wrong amount, and wut not

I think this guy must have shorted the lady???

http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=62571&boardID=29&page=1#62571

I've had ladies do it multiple ways, most of which were out of my sight.  I have had women open it in front of me and count (bit tacky, but for their own good, so I'm fine with it), and afterwards, not an issue with me.  The one thing I do not like is not being given a chance to put it down on the table.  

Of course, being a old sailor, I follow the rules of the sea, one of which is you always, I mean always, without any deviation, pay a hooker!  We sailors are not the likes of those low life Secret Servicemen!

i have never asked for the donation.  anyone who is in this hobby knows the drill and i dont like to ask for it.  i know for me, it feels tacky and also it changes my head a little.  i dont think of this job as business and i think if i were to handle business before a session, it would completely change how i feel during the session.

i also think that the gentlemen might feel that way as well.

i can knock on wood, because i have never been stiffed or robbed, or shorted.   it starts at the clientele you choose to attract.   i just have been lucky to get some of the best!

Ava,

In the 12 years that I have the hobby thing, I have NEVER paid a provider as soon as I walk in the door. Never happens. In fact, all of the providers INSIST that I pay them after the services have been rendered.

One provider told me why she does it this way...

Do you pay your auto mechanic to work on your car BEFORE he does any work?

No, you pay the mechanic AFTER he/she performs the services on your car.

F.Y.I., I have NEVER shorted any provider of their stated rate. However, I have been in 2 cash & dash deals where the provider just stole my money. Another reason why I do not pay as soon as I walk in the door. I don't want to get burned again. Yes, those 2 providers were supposedly well reviewed on TER.

That's my 3 cents,

Serpius

I always drop the envelop on the desk or the dresser when I enter her rooom. I want the lady to know she has nothing to worry about concerning payment.  Then after a minute or two of chit chat I will excuse myself to the rest room so the lady can count the envelop if she wishes. Many times the envelop never gets open while I'm in the bathroom   BTW, Never been ripped off  or had a never cash or dash.

-- Modified on 6/6/2012 7:02:20 AM

Yes I agree with counting it in front of you, I always thought that was tacky, although I've had men count it in front of ME and I always felt a bit odd when they did that.

You really are an old sailor? I wish you could see my mermaid and pirate-theme room. I love the sea.  I had a client who was overseas primarily in Asian ports  ( and was married five times each to a hooker he met). He wanted to retire in the Phillipines where he could live well on his pension. And he asked me to be wife number six.

As you can see I said no thanks LOLOL

I always lay the envelope down on a table or counter where she can see it. I've never known if she counted it or not. If she did it in front of me I wouldn't care.  Though I know not all the ladies do things exactly the same way all that I have seen state on their website to place it down upon entry.

A different experience might have caused me to do things differently but to this point I've had no troubles and see no reason to change my procedure.

And if you read all the sites of the top gals, their Etiquette section always asks you to drop the donation on a table before the session starts. If you don't, no session.  If you only see well-reviewed girls you will never get ripped off.  To me, the mechanic analogy doesn't hold up.  The mechanic has your car until he gets paid.  What's the provider holding?  Zip. If you do the session and leave without paying, there's little she can do unless she's got muscle nearby (and most do not).  Her only recourse then is to blacklist you but she's still out her money.

First meetings, the donation is placed appropriately.  I then go wash my hands throughly & anything else that needs it.   Seldom does the donation get moved.  In a few cases, the ladies have counted it or removed it to a separate place before play.  In one case, my clothes were in a dressing room away from the bed & she asked me for it after...  it was a bit unusual routine that had me goofed up.  I guess I could have left it in the bathroom but wasn't prepared.

On repeat visits, I generally empty my pocket junk when undressing...  the donation is separate & sits on the dresser throughout & is left behind when redressing.  My lady friends seem to prefer this.   One lady, now a friend, does not deal with the transaction until after...  I sense she thinks this is safer from stings.
HV

It definitely works both ways, with differing perspectives, from both parties. I've been lucky in the sense that I never ask for the donation up front, BUT, most men do pay up front.  In the very rare occasion in which the client and I simply didn't click, here's what I do. I offer them the option of leaving what they FEEL comfortable with. If there money is already there, they are free to take it all back if for whatever reason they weren't happy with me. But, as I said, since this very rarely happens, when it did, the client was nice enough to leave me at least a portion of whatever time we had spent together. That's only fair. However the option to leave nothing is there too.

Now, I disagree with you regarding " do you pay an auto mechanic before..." etc, but, even if the service is not up to par regarding an appointment, I feel the client still owes the girl the money. If the service was bad, Serpius, would you not leave any money at all for her?  Or would you leave a small amount of what you felt the service was 'worth' to you? I'm curious to hear your response.

See my response to Serpius's comment. Almost ALL the clients I have had, ( I never ask up front) place the donation in plain view of me in an envelope on a table or counter. And I count it when the gentleman is taking a bathroom break. In all the years I have worked as a provider ( and it's been a while LOL) I have only been ripped off a couple times. One time, a client I had seen for several sessions ( I put the money in my purse and he must have seen that) . I didn't think I had to distrust him since I had seen him 6 times. But I had gone to the bathroom and my purse was in the closet. After he left, and I was about to go to the bank, I looked in the purse and my money was GONE. He had taken it back. I wondered just why someone would do that. Maybe that was his style, getting you to 'trust' and then taking the money back. Stupid. I never saw him again obviously.

Funny the same ones spouting off about the providers being the ones who insisted, are full of shit. I talked to a few of them who said it was bs ha ha. Drama reigns as always.  I would really like to know what reputable provider insists that a new guy pays after the date...right lol. Sounds like CL.

-- Modified on 6/6/2012 4:52:39 PM

-- Modified on 6/6/2012 4:55:35 PM

Here we go again with, "this is not Rocket Science".......put the damn envelope on the table when u arrive and be done with it.....gezzzz!!!
Pay after? Never heard of it either!!

'all providers insist that i pay them after the services have been rendered'..total blather.maybe thats the way they do it on the planet serpius..but not here..it is just a basic fact of hobbying that the donation is given PRIOR to the session..not after..any provider who INSISTS on payment afterward is either naive or drunk..pay for play means pay to play..you dont buy the ticket for the roller coaster after you have ridden it..do you?

Ava,

If you see my revews, I believe that all of the ladies are TER members. Now, all of those years, not one has mentioned putting the money up front. Therefore, I am NOT compelled to put the money up front.

If I recall correctly, 2 of my reviews were of ladies who either ripped me off or offered poor service. In both cases... they got the FULL stated rate... UPFRONT. A big mistake on my part. If you look closely, BOTH of them are supposedly highly reviewed. After the 2nd rip-off, I made it a point to put up the money after the session was over. I have had ZERO complaints about it.

The rest of the ladies have offered great service, therefore, they got their stated rate.

In fact, why don't you ask the lady from my last review? Ask her how I treated her.

I'll let her do the talking.

P.S. Unlike the comment from one person in this thread... NONE of them are from Craigslist. All have come from TER. They *MAY* post ads in Backpage, just like this one person does, but I never contacted any ladies from CL (before the close) or from Backpage.

Serpius

Good analogy, but missing one thing. If you choose not to pay your mechanic after the work is done, you don't get your car back. If the guys chooses not to pay us afterward, or shorts us.. what exactly can we do, besides letting other providers know of his ways? If you get paid up-front, there are no worries about the guy running out or shorting you, If the guys chooses to not pay up-front, then he will not receive the services.

I never ask for the donation up front. I've been in this business a long time, and out of all the years I have been in it, ( 15 years part-time)  I think getting ripped off twice is a pretty good record. I chalked it up to experience. I have to admit being really hurt more than angry about it especially since one of them was a client I saw six times, and he stole the money right out of my purse when I had gone to the restroom. And the other guy? Well let's just say that's why I count the money ( and have been pleasantly surprised to find a tip in there when I do)  discreetly when the gentleman is in the bathroom.

In what galaxy I wonder? LOLOL

Galaxy Exaggeration?

please don't try it in the NY Metro area.  It would not be healthy for you.

I'm SOOOOOOOO glad that you feel that way.

Geez... grow up and graduate from high school, already.

Serpius

Hello,

Don't know why you and other are pissed about the way things are done.

If you don't like it, then don't respond to me. Or better yet, skip over my postings.

The mechanic analogy was given to me by a provider. I didn't make that up. If you folks don't believe me, I really don't care.

I treat my providers with respect and I get respect in return.

Serpius

Dear Sarah:
Although I am usually correct with the amount, I always make a brief mention of it at the end of the session to be fair with the provider.


As I am not on the provider board, I find your post very helpful. I often wonder about this. Back in CA I would receive money in my account in anticipation of our engagement, but I had known these men for years. This is a little different. I also feel awkward counting the money up front, but am aware of the stories of shorting. Was the man who shorted you someone from here or somewhere you could follow up? Did you bother following up or just chalk it up to experience?

I want to get the money out of the way so I don't have to think about it. If I get ripped off it is only money that I can easily replace as it is just money I was going to spend at that time anyway. After sex I am not at my most organized in thought. What if I forget to pay? That can destroy my reputation. That is not replaceable. Besides, who wants to spend or have their partner worry about the money while fucking? Sorry you don't speak for me. I much rather pay first thing.

Ava, I always pay exactly as the lady wishes to be paid as expressed in her ad or web site. If there is no such instructions I put it in a card or envelope and place it in plain site like a table or counter-top while she is watching. I prefer to make sure there is no misunderstanding so I try to give the lady a few minutes alone with the money first thing so she can count it and try to make sure she sees it.

I do not care if it is counted in front of me in fact I rather that you did as once, She didn't see the money I left where she told me to (on the sink in the bathroom not in an envelope). It led to a very awkward few minutes when she thought I shorted her and called to confront me. Things got worked out, but I was in full panic mode wondering what happened the money and she was pissed for a bit. I would like to avoid that in the future.

Just ONE fat ugly client's point of view. He does not speak for me.

-- Modified on 6/6/2012 7:42:57 PM

one that is far..far away..from reality at least..

and excuse myself to the bathroom.  It is implicit on me to establish my credibility and creditworthiness, and were I in the provider's shoes, I would want the comfort of knowing that there are no integrity issues so I can relax and focus on the date.

Once I have been with a provider enough that they know and trust me, I still will place the envelope out 99% of the time, but I don't make a ceremony about it, and they tend not to examine it.  They know I am generous and appreciative, and keep examination of the envelope for an after session surprise.

The classy ones will text me afterward, thanking me for the generosity.  The other ones I don't visit again.  The lack of manners in a service industry would normally be a death knell for the business, that message is not always understood in this culture.

BTW Ava, I sent you an apology on P411 which I presume you might have deleted since it has gone unread for a couple of days.  It was not my intent to insult you, and I am sorry you took it that way.

Hey that was over a mere 30 bucks!

I don't read reviews, sorry.

Ava,

Don't read review?

That's YOUR problem not mine.

Serpius

Hi Everyone;
  I'm a new member here at TER, not new to the "hobby". I've been enjoying exploring the boards and thought this an interesting thread. I totally agree with hiddenhills on this, it's exactly how I've always handled payments. Just seems to make sense to offer it up front then excuse myself to go wash up. Gives them the privacy to check the envelope and lets them know my hands are clean. Soon enough they'll realize the rest of me is also squeaky clean as well.
  My tip is handled after the session. Method of offering this depends on several factors.
  Anyway....some interesting points of view on these boards.

i am in a somewhat unique situation than perhaps most providers here, as i have not seen any new clients in well over a year, so have established relationships with every man i see. therefore there is an inherent level of trust. i do not even think about those green pieces of paper until my time with a gent is concluded, whether that is one hour or two days. some leave bills lying in plain sight from the very start, some choose a discreet "hiding" place at the end of our time together, and those with whom i'm the closest (and with whom i spend the most time) are completely comfortable simply handing it to me as we say our goodbyes. but regardless of who or when, i would not dare even think to count/check money before a date has concluded and i was alone. there have actually been several times when my mind was elsewhere and a day or more passed before i bothered to check the "donation."

this works for me because i see only trusted friends. i would not do the same if i were seeing strangers.