Has anyone done it successfully? I'm curious to see for myself, but would love input as well..

I've dated a couple, it's challenging but doable with the right people.  Im aware of at least one couple that have been married for years after first meeting as provider and client.

I once dated a gentleman I met when I worked in Dennis Hof's brothels... We had a lot in common, we were both open sexually, we had tons of fun together - we actually got engaged... and then, he started taking an interest in the other girls who were "working"... We lasted less than a year, and that was the last time I ever dated a client... Though, if I were to meet the right person, I'm sure I would give it another try...

One of my clients tells me about his uncle who married a call-girl and they are still married to this day, as well. So we know it's possible!! ;

i may know the uncle you are referring to

Though one could also say it is more of a sugar baby/sugar daddy arrangement also.  But I'm also her boyfriend, or the closest thing she has to a boyfriend as she has said many times.  Neither one of us were actually looking for this, it just happened.  I saw her as a provider three times when she was in my area and we hit it off really well.  Then she told me the next time I visited her area I was welcome to stay at her place instead of a hotel.  So I took her up on that and stayed with her for over three days.  That was when our relationship started to shift from a provider/client arrangement to where it is now.

The next time she was in my area she told me she didn't want me giving her money anymore and that she would feel better about it that way.  I do help her out financially when she is in a jam and go out of my way to look out for her best interest in general.  Whenever she is upset about something and needs someone to talk to about something, I am often the first person she calls.  We have become very, very, close and take trips together and see each other as often as possible.  

It is a bit of an emotional minefield for me.  For one thing, I'm married and have been trapped in a sexless marriage for may years.  My wife is my best friend and someone I get along with very well.  Overall she has been a good life partner.  But I have no sex life with her, she simply is not interested.  I can't live that way.  It makes me feel bad about myself and very empty.  Having my special lady friend fill this hole in my life has really reminded me of what I have been missing in my life for so many, many, years.  It is far, far, more emotionally satisfying than just having sex with a provider.  

Usually I have had no problem with having sex with providers for many, many, years without getting emotionally attached.  This one though has become an issue for me because I have developed very strong feeling for her.  She says she cares for me and really likes me, buy her feelings for me are not as strong as my feelings for her.  One reason she gives is because I am not available though there could be other reasons obviously.  So on the one hand, I'm glad she doesn't feel the same way because I'm not in a position to be totally available for her.  It would be selfish and not looking out for her best interest for me to expect more from her.  It does bug me when she goes on dates with other guys and sees clients.  But she has to support herself so I understand and if she found some Mr. Right I would just have to be happy for her and accept it.  

The relationship I have with her is so much more satisfying that seeing providers.  I can't imagine going back to the way it was before.  I have cut back on seeing providers quite a bit and do it more now so her seeing clients does not bug me so much.  

I also can't imagine leaving my wife.  It's not her fault she has lost all interest in sex and I can't imagine hurting my fest friend like that even if my lady friend did have the same feeling for me that I have for her.  

If I continue my relationship with my special lady friend, at some point this is going to have some type of resolution.  Changing to an open marriage might be the only option assuming the whole thing didn't blow up in my face.  I don't like the level of deception that I have been using lately to swing trips with my special lady friend.  

So dating within the hobby can work.  It just comes down to finding the right person just like it would in any situation.  My situation is very different because I was not looking for this and I'm not 100% available.  But it does show what can happen if two people meet who seem to really hit it off better than usual and really enjoy each other's company

Lol, what a crazy random coincidence

Thank you so much for adding to the conversation! You brought up many of the complications I would be concerned with, in dating a client... and some that I've dealt with, personally.

Sharing would be tough for me - I would actually love to be in a monogamous relationship... Would it be asking too much for an arrangement AND monogamy? I don't want someone to pay me day by day, I want someone to invest in me and my life and my ideas... So that I can focus on the most important things in life.

Yeah, we have talked about that.  If she lived closer we would have an exclusive arrangement.  But she lives in a different state than I do.   She has less of an issue with sharing than I do actually, or she acts that way.  Though sometimes she says it does bug her when she knows I see a provider.  Plus I learned that the hard way one night when we were talking about how our sex was better when we did it every other night rather than every night.  Like an idiot I mentioned seeing my number 3 favorite the day after she had been visiting family for a month and had not been with anyone for a month.  Oups!  So that night I learned she was perhaps not quite as okay with sharing as she had previously indicated.  

But overall it has been great.  We have no problem being together 24 hours a day for a full week without getting tired of each other, arguing, or annoying one another.  I can assure you if I actually had a sex life at home I wouldn't waste money on providers and would have never met her.  But unfortunately life can't seem to be that simple.  In fact, it can get really complicated!

Similarly to hanky-panky, a few years back I have was in a situation with a provider. I can't even lie, it was awesome until I messed it up. Like most guys who hobby, I have a partner at home.  Long story short, a provider came to my house one night for an outcall, and we hit it off. Mostly because of the sex. That was the last time we ever discussed money, we simply started doing things as a booty call, and then a lil more than a booty call. She knew my home situation, and to her credit, never really tried to mess with it. I however, have trust issues, so anything that seemed strange, I confronted her about it in an accusatory manner instead of simply talking to her. Even though we kinda overcame my limitations, it eventually wore thin on our situation. We are still friends, but we certainly don't hang out like we used to.

Another provider I used to see, same situation almost. Met once or twice, then no more money, just friends with benefits. I am pretty sure she caught some feelings as we carried on. Like an idiot however, I accidentally included her information, when I was providing references to another provider. As to be expected, she wasn't pleased after that reference call. We hung out once or twice after that, but it wasn't the same. Plus she insisted that we make it more business like again.  

Hopefully it works for you Amber, because you look like an absolute catch

END OF MESSAGE

Let's be honest - I could never marry someone without the means to support me, after this... I wouldn't want to. I like being taken care of... I don't mean that in a bored rich housewife kind of way, I just want to feel like a woman - and I want to feel like my man is THE man....  

Is that bad?..

Sounds like maybe expectations weren't quite clear..? I've had that problem, for sure! It's really a tough conversation to have, taking it from business to fun to business again...  

Thank you for your input!

As long as a lady contributes some way that shouldn't be an issue.  My wife has never had to work in a job, but she wants to so she has her own money.  So she works part time and tries to find things to do that she likes.  She also keeps the house spotless.  

If I had a wife that just sat on her ass watching television all day, left the house a mess, and did nothing productive, she wouldn't be my wife for very long.  

Everyone needs something productive to do for their own wellbeing.  Even when I retire from my current carrier I will do something else work wise.  I won't need to make as much, but I would want it to be something that I feel is productive and does overall good

Especially in this business, if a man wants to marry/date a provider and wants her to give up her job he better support her financially all the way. I gave up what I was doing for an ex bf for 3 years and did something else but while I was looking for a job and after when I found one and my income dropped drastically he did not support me at all. He was just happy that I was not a provider any more. During those three years I missed providing, my clients and my independence and the fact that I was able to take care of myself.
After he realized I want to get back to providing, he left. As devastating as it was, when I paid off my credit card debt in 2 months I cried with joy.  
I do love what I do and this is how I support myself. Not only that, it gives me the chance and freedom to explore my other passions such as photography, learning another language, traveling, dancing, painting, writing, as well as helping others in need.  
If a man wants to date/marry me and stop what I do as my job then he better support me al the way.  

So..... the long and the short of it is, I agree with Amber one hundred percent.

XOXO
Zayla

-- Modified on 5/12/2016 12:35:41 AM

Thank you for your response, Zayla! I'm always interested in what you have to say.

I worked legally in Nevada when I first started, and a little more than a year later, fell for this guy... He was successful and didn't want me to work if we were going to be together - I wanted to give our relationship a real shot, so I quit "working" and moved in with him. I ended up working for him, unpaid (I mean I ACTUALLY worked for him, for his business to support our home - not that I was his SB or something) and only had my basic needs met (as an example, I did my own hair color, at home - NOT because we couldn't afford it). He gambled more money than he spent on me, and at the time, it didn't bother me, I was generally just happy to be with him... But when we broke up, I ended up having to sleep on my best friend's couch til I finally made the decision to go back to escorting.

I don't regret that relationship, I think it was an opportunity to learn things about myself & life... So I really don't feel like it was time wasted, but after that I did feel naive. It's hard to think about giving up my biggest source of income for a relationship that may or may not pan out. And you're right, Zayla - about the benefits of what we do; we have time to focus on our passions, and learning, and progressing, and contributing to society. I don't want to lose any of that... Still, I'm missing that deeper connection - I just find it hard to imagine it with someone who wouldn't invest in me