IMO yes, the person should receive some type of donation for their time...since it was not their doing, and it was an unfortunate mishap. If it were the other way around; do you think it would not be reasonable to ask for some "extra" time or a discount, when you two were able to meet? I believe it would be reasonable (either way), and I'm sure most others would as well...or am I mistaken?
I had a appointment today which I missed because I couldn't find the place. I had mapquested it but was doing it from memory. I turned on a street that had the same name but was Blvd instead of Rd and, of course, never found where I needed to go. I didn't have the person's phone number so was not able to call. I looked for the place up until I was 45 minutes late for the appointment and then gave up. I notified her when I got home but I don't think she was very happy about it. Should I compensate the person for missing my time? If so, how much would be appropriate? Thanks
-- Modified on 9/6/2010 4:21:11 PM
I have done this before as well and I drove around for an hour trying to find her place. When I got back to my place I logged in and got her number and called her right away. When I saw her I made sure I brought her something special that she liked. Point is you need to reach out ASAP when you make a mistake and don't hide from it. It's up to you what you bring her but treat her right!
Always take the providers contact # with you just in case, or you are wasting our time. If you want to be nice bring her a gift for the trouble you caused her. A sign of good faith, or token of your appreciation.
IMO yes, the person should receive some type of donation for their time...since it was not their doing, and it was an unfortunate mishap. If it were the other way around; do you think it would not be reasonable to ask for some "extra" time or a discount, when you two were able to meet? I believe it would be reasonable (either way), and I'm sure most others would as well...or am I mistaken?
It sounds like you really tried but were unsuccessful in getting there. I'd highly suggest a very sincere apology, explaining what happened, how it was your fault, and what steps you'll take to not mess up in the future. But in the future you should perhaps try to be a bit more fastidious on the details, bringing your mapquest printout and the provider's phone number, for example. BTW if you screw up again with this provider, then I'd suggest some compensation should then be going her way. Buck up, RC.
I would try and contact her, explain the situation and aplogize and try and arrange for another appointment. After all, people do make mistakes and there was certainly no premeditation in this case. Some have suggested gifts but what I would do is provide a really big fat tip when you finally hook up. With respect to how much I would go at least half the amount had you hooked up with her the first time. And remember to ask her to give you an okay on the whitelist!!
The prices for a gps have come way down, it's worth it for you to purcase one. Rincoat for someone who has 25 reviews I find it hard to understand why you didn't take your cell phone with you for the exact reason you explained in your post. If it was me, I would compensate her for the missed session and then book another session with her.
-- Modified on 9/7/2010 7:26:36 PM
Sure, yet another digital device to give up your privacy! For forays of that nature, try Mapquest or Thomas Guides. Way more secure.
-- Modified on 9/7/2010 7:26:36 PM
I find it a little strange that she didn't call you to check if you had the right directions when 10 mins late ( assuming she had your number & knew that it was okay to call)
-- Modified on 9/6/2010 4:21:11 PM
i do and did like michelle said she was sitting right there with me when i did. I was also checking emails and pms on this site as well as the other site he communicated with me thru. at around 1220 he sent me a blank message on another site. At this point i had already pmd him saying id only be waiting until 1230.
This is a lie
I never received a phone call or a PM from you saying you would only wait until 12:30
I received a PM from you saying I had missed my appointment- "you didn't show up"
Furthermore, my phone was not turned off. Even further, I had PMd you the night before asking you for your phone number- you ignored that PM.
in a perfect world she would be compensated for her time. Time is money! I know many companions that require a 25% deposit per date for patrons. They allow a one time reschedule and that's that. This would be harsh and unnecessary for me personally, though a requirement when dealing with donations on the elite level for extended periods of time. I hope to shed some light on her reaction to you by giving details about myself below...
For almost every gentleman seeking a date with me, I spend a great amount of time building a relationship with that gentleman via email exchanges and by researching the individual (i.e. reference checks and reading reviews to get to know his likes and dislikes). I also spend at the very least 1.5 hours getting pretty and fresh for each date. This is not to mention making sure I have the perfect outfit, toys, and lingerie he specifically will find enticing.
Having worked in the corporate world for most of my working years, I understand presentation is everything and effort is mandatory in ANY field. However, effort in this lifestyle is tenfold in terms of presentation. I hope my next comment will be read with a light heart…We do not sit around in lingerie and heels waiting for the phone to ring (: If not from the guys, I hope I will get a laugh from the gals.
That being said, I would never hold it against a man if he forgot his phone and got lost. I have had many similar situations come my way, and I have definitely been on the giving end more than a time or two. By giving the gentlemen in my life the freedom to make mistakes, I hope I will receive the same in turn.
What a great message- you are such an eloquent writer.
The map quest directions state "proceed onto Jamacha ROAD." You turned right on Jamacha BLVD. Two different streets. You should have gone straight rather than turning right.
Since you PM'd her at 12:20 pm and your appointment was a noon, you did not look for her 45 minutes as stated above.
If you PM'd her from your phone then why not listen to the message she left for you or call her back. If you PM'd her from your home computer then unless you live really close to my house you could not have made it home in 20 minutes, that implies you never left your house. So which is it?
She works out of my house. I was there with her waiting for you to show up. I was there when she got the PM from you. I know she has seen you before but never at my house.
I know she called you, your phone was turned off.
If you don't want to compensate her for the wasted time then I would not be the least bit surprised if she will never book another session with you.
more lies
First off, if I arrived at Jamacha Blvd at 11:55 and Pmd at 12:20 that I was lost and then continued to look until 12:45 then I most certainly could have and DID look for over 45 minutes. Don't call me a liar. Second, I emailed Tiarra when I got home at about 1:30PM which doesn't mean I live close to you
. Even worse how do you know where I live? If Tiarra is telling you where I live I don't appreciate her telling people where I live. What other personal info is Tiarrra telling people. I by the way have my emails to Tiarra and could easily prove they occured well after 1:00PM.
You PM'd at 12:20, a blank PM, that PM said nothing.
I have no idea where you live. You misinterpreted my statement (that unless you live close to my house...) My point was you either sent the PM using your phone which would mean you had your phone with you so why not answer Tiarra's call to you asking where you were? Or, it means you were at home at 12:20 to send the PM, which would mean you did not spend 45 minutes looking for the in-call location.
So either you are lying about having your phone with you or you are lying about driving around lost for 45 minutes. I don't care either way. You're the one who posted this thread asking what you should do, so you opened the door to this discussion. I responded because some of the information you posted was clearly false. Any opinion given to a person has to be based on the facts of the situation or the opinions are worthless.
You made the argument today that since she left at 12:30 after not being able to reach you by phone or PM that she is somehow at fault and should not be compensated for the entire hour. Your logic escapes me.
You made the appointment, she sent you the address. You didn't answer your phone when she called a little after noon asking where you were. At 12:20 you sent her a blank PM she responded to that PM by telling you she would wait until 12:30 for you to get there. No response from you.
As far as her giving you her phone number it's posted on every one of her ads, you could have gone to her more recent ad and gotten that information.
This screw up is on you. She was where she was supposed to be, prepared to deliver her usual excellent service. She did all she could to reach out to you.....you were unreachable. You owe her for the entire session. It shouldn't be a problem really because you had that money in your wallet ready to pay her when you were driving around looking for the address....right?
I know what I witnessed and what I witnessed is different than the story you tell.
First off- who are you Michelle H? Why am I having this discussion with you? I don't know you. Can't Tiarra answer for herself? You state, "My point was you either sent the PM using your phone which would mean you had your phone with you so why not answer Tiarra's call to you asking where you were? Or, it means you were at home at 12:20 to send the PM, which would mean you did not spend 45 minutes looking for the in-call location. So either you are lying about having your phone with you or you are lying about driving around lost for 45 minutes. I don't care either way." Huh! What kind of logic is that? I didn't answer the phone because it didn't ring. She didn't call me. Everything I said in the first post of this thread is true.
You also state that all her ads have her phone number-please look at her postings from 9/2/10 and 8/14/10- do you see a phone number listed there? Is it in invisible ink? Is it a number only some people can see?
Like I said before, I didn't lie and I don't like being called a liar, especially by someone I don't know and who seems to know more about me than they should.
I won't give Tiarra one dime and believe me I would have until you both smeared me on this board. I didn't open the door but I am closing it.
No need to drag this on, Do as you see fit i will do the same. Also seeing that you have seen me a few times i figured you had my number. my number isnt listed on my ads here but is on my profile here as well as on my ads on the other site you sent me a message on. I did call but we can argue all day about that my call log shows it. I did not tell anyone where you live as i dont even remember where you live which you should know because when i thought you wanted an outcall i asked for your address. But again raincoat you have seen me quite a few times we have never had a problem before my time was waisted and you came here asking for advise. I didnt flame you i just stated what happend on my end. Like i said you dont have to repay me thats on you.
Take care all
You also state that all her ads have her phone number-please look at her postings from 9/2/10 and 8/14/10- do you see a phone number listed there? Is it in invisible ink? Is it a number only some people can see?
Like I said before, I didn't lie and I don't like being called a liar, especially by someone I don't know and who seems to know more about me than they should.
I won't give Tiarra one dime and believe me I would have until you both smeared me on this board. I didn't open the door but I am closing it.
First off, if I arrived at Jamacha Blvd at 11:55 and Pmd at 12:20 that I was lost and then continued to look until 12:45 then I most certainly could have and DID look for over 45 minutes. Don't call me a liar. Second, I emailed Tiarra when I got home at about 1:30PM which doesn't mean I live close to you
. Even worse how do you know where I live? If Tiarra is telling you where I live I don't appreciate her telling people where I live. What other personal info is Tiarrra telling people. I by the way have my emails to Tiarra and could easily prove they occured well after 1:00PM.
Just curious. Not taking sides.
Hi Natasha
I looked for Tiarra's phone number before I left for the appointment since she had not given it to me in response to my PM message. I looked for her posted B-day ad on another site and it seemed to have been removed- at least I couldn't find it anymore. I then looked at her posts on TER and they did not list her number. So while I was driving, I didn't think it would have been very fruitful to look for her number since I didn't find it before, plus it was already 12:20. When I got home, I found her number on her profile but didn't think about looking for it there when I was driving around. I was just thinking about trying to find her place. I guess I really thought I was on the right street and was not driving far enough down to catch the cross street, so I kept driving farther and farther south. I really did not receive a call from her. I have no messages or even a number under missed calls. I don't know what number she called.
First off, if I arrived at Jamacha Blvd at 11:55 and Pmd at 12:20 that I was lost and then continued to look until 12:45 then I most certainly could have and DID look for over 45 minutes. Don't call me a liar. Second, I emailed Tiarra when I got home at about 1:30PM which doesn't mean I live close to you
. Even worse how do you know where I live? If Tiarra is telling you where I live I don't appreciate her telling people where I live. What other personal info is Tiarrra telling people. I by the way have my emails to Tiarra and could easily prove they occured well after 1:00PM.
Just curious. Not taking sides.
keep your word, you told me you wanted to compensate me and i told you what the donation would have been since you said you "bought me a bday gift" which would have been a special rate not even my original donation, Then you told me no way to much. Then you gave me another amount youd be willing to give me. By no means do i need the donation its that fact that you went out of your way to tell me you wanted to repay me and asked what the donation was. Either way keep your promise.
Again not holding my breath on the matter but keep it real. Dont offer something you dont want to follow thru with.
you are right- I did ask you how much you wanted to be compensated. You told you thought you deserved the amount for the hour. I told you that seemed unfair for an innocent mistake and offered to pay you another amount. I also told you that I was going out of town and would do it when I got back. I don't really appreciate being called a liar and frankly don't appreciate you telling people where I live.
You never called me or if you did you called the wrong number. If you had given me your phone number liked I asked much of this would not have happened.
Raincoat. Your taking a bit of a beating here and it can't serve your rep well. If I were you, I would try and reconcile this matter with the lady immediately and get this off the board. Hopefully, this is the final reply and you get it resoved to all impacted parties satisfaction.
I'm not sure why my reputation is taking a beating. All I wanted to do was the "right thing" From the sounds of it no one- zero-offer to compensate if they miss. At least I was willing to go that far. I never told her I would compensate her any price she asked. Crap she left after 30 minutes and then asked for an hours worth of compensation and them made things up. I don't even know why she went public with this in the first place. I never told anyone on the board it was about her. I was just trying to see what others did in a similar situation. Geez I'm reallly sorry I ever brought this up
You didn't mention any names which is a good thing but I've seen this happen on other regional boards. Someone mentions an event that occurred without any names but someone involved in the event figures it out and goes public on the board. Usually ends up with the person initially mentioning the event getting hammered. I guess a tough lesson. My unsolicited advice for the future is that if you have a question that has even the slightest chance of being viewed as a tad sensitive to others, go to the board and look for others that post a lot and have written a lot of reviews. Then pose that question through a PM to a few of those guys. I think you'll find most guys receptive to answering a reasonable question and telling you what they would do in your situation, especially since it's a PM through the TER community. And the ladies I think would be appreciative of this since the event never hits the board (even though no names are mentioned) and you have taken the time to talk to experienced guys (that have probably in fact seen the provider) and attempted to arrive at an equitable solution.
Raincoat, I just read your replies to the ladies and, while I recognize you are just trying to respond and describe the situation in the way you see it, dude, you gotta take this offline. See if they are willing to correspond via email or PM with the ultimate goal of pathcing things up.
Thanks Newtonklv- I really do appreciate you advice and much of what you say is very sound. However, if there is one thing that really gets under my skin is when people call me a liar especially when they are lying at the same time. I went to the appointment, before going I went to the ATM, went to the store and bought her a plant, I took the wrong street and couldn't find the side street I was looking for. I got home at about 1:25 and sent her a number of PMs to various sites, including TER and some of which can't be mentioned here. I text her after finding her number in her profile. I apologized a number of times. I've never missed an appointment before and sorry it happened this time. But don't call me a liar.
Hey Raincoat (like the handle BTW). Have not been on here too much recently and thanks for the thanks on advice but every situation is unique. As George Thouroughgood (may need a spell check on that name) sings in his song (not sure what the correct title is but I recall " want bourbon , want scotch , want beer") "everybody funny". Point being, all situations are in fact unique and folks react differentley and everybody has their own quirks. So, simply put, my unsolicited advice is keep any perceived or in fact real issues off the board and try and deal with them on a private venue. That's all. I recognize it may be hard when you feel facts have been twisted ( not that I have an opinion on the ladies perspective or, for that matter, yours) but, I just think it is best to let it go and try to resolve any issues on a private level. I realize that means letting stuff go on an online board and dealing with posts that are active with no response but , it seems to me at least, that letting go early is the best bet. Having the last word is okay, I guess, but I'm fairly certain ladies would quickly move on because an exchange on this board on these issues is just not productive.