I had a client contact me who I have not seen in roughly 2 years requesting I white list him. My thoughts immediately was why all of a sudden is he asking to be white listed after all this time? I said no I would not, since I don't know if he's still a good standing hobbyist or if he's become a problem child with providers, I don't feel compelled to vouch for him until I know.
He was taken back by my answer of no, I would like other people's thoughts on the time frame for a white list referral. How long is too long of time gone by to vouch for a hobbyist to be white listed?
I'm sure some providers wish they could take back their white list recommendations after only a few months. Personally i would say 2 months at being the most.
Luckily, there is an option to remove the whitelist referral if needed. Xoxo
Posted By: DatyYoda
I'm sure some providers wish they could take back their white list recommendations after only a few months. Personally i would say 2 months at being the most.
after that i don't reference anyone for safety reasons
i had a guy just last week send me a request thru date-check from 2004!!!!! kinda shocked me that 9yrs later im the only reference this guy could come up with? sorry not gonna happen even if i was able to remember him lol 6 months is the max i will reference anyone
When I ask for reference it must be within the last year. And if I give a whitelist I consider it like the honor roll in school...it has to be earned every year.
I will whitelist a guy only if I have seen him at least 3 times and once I give it then it will only stay up for one year from the last time I saw him.
I do this due to the fact I had a regular client change dramatically in a year. And when I give a whitelist I consider my reputation is going along with it.
So you are right in NOT giving it since it has been 2 years.
I do not white list unless I have had two positive encounters with that person. Some sites prescreen members but because TER doesn't I want to be sure the person I am vouching for really is a good guy, not just good for one date to get the reference.
I don't think people change much as a rule. If a man is in his 40's or 50's and you see him once, the overwhelming odds would be that he is the same man 2 or 3 years down the road. It seems to me that the gal looking at the whitelist can look at the dates and make up her own mind if she wants to use that recommendation.
Would you girls like your reviews taken down after a year or less?
I do agree however, if it has been sometime and you aren't certain, don't whitelist.
As a provider, I appreciate that you had the consideration NOT to whitelist him. As you mentioned, who knows if he's changed in the last two years or not? It is, on some level, all of our responsibility to keep one another safe..including and especially providers.
I recently had someone contact me from FL wanting a reference for someone I haven't seen in three years. I told her I hadn't seen him in three years but that yes, I remembered him. I told her if I were her, I would insist on a reference from someone he's seen in the last handful of months rather than years. Evidently she went ahead with the appointment and thankfully everything was fine.
Certain risk will always exist in this world thanks to the strict laws that bind us however, I will always do what I can to minimize my own risk and the risk of those with whom I come in contact. Again, I appreciate your willingness to tell that gentleman no. It takes balls especially when so many men believe they have the upper hand...and often might depending on their BC friendships, etc.
Girlfriend my imaginary balls are that of an elephant's, I will sacrifice clients by standing my ground to protect myself and any of the local providers I've befriended along the way......so you're very welcome
Posted By: Andi Ryan
As a provider, I appreciate that you had the consideration NOT to whitelist him. As you mentioned, who knows if he's changed in the last two years or not? It is, on some level, all of our responsibility to keep one another safe..including and especially providers.
I recently had someone contact me from FL wanting a reference for someone I haven't seen in three years. I told her I hadn't seen him in three years but that yes, I remembered him. I told her if I were her, I would insist on a reference from someone he's seen in the last handful of months rather than years. Evidently she went ahead with the appointment and thankfully everything was fine.
Certain risk will always exist in this world thanks to the strict laws that bind us however, I will always do what I can to minimize my own risk and the risk of those with whom I come in contact. Again, I appreciate your willingness to tell that gentleman no. It takes balls especially when so many men believe they have the upper hand...and often might depending on their BC friendships, etc.
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