Maybe this belongs on some general type discussion board, but I'm posting here because I'm interested in a Philly area response...from the ladies, and maybe even guys who want to chime in.  I dunno, after 1 pig-out bbq yesterday, and another slated for my place tomorrow, maybe I'm the one with too much time on my hands today.  Anyways....

I see in many of the ladies' ads/websites phrasing to the effect of "I really love my job." So my serious question: Do you really?

I've got a bunch of random thoughts floating around in my hungover grey matter today, which I'll spew...but then I'm all ears (or eyes, as the case may be):
  - If you "really" love your job, why is it necessary to state that in your advertising?  Cynics like me tend to read that and think: "she probably hates her job/lifestyle, and feels compelled to compensate by stating the opposite."
  - I'm closing in on 60 now, and don't have half the "oomph" I used to have.  Ok, still a horny old devil, but far too often "Little Frankie" just doesn't want to comply.  But even thinking back to when I was half my age, when my hormones flowed most freely, I can't imagine being with 3, 4, 5 or more different woman in a day...several days a week.  Now I do know that stallions and mares are built diffently, but there are limits.  So ladies, can your encounters really be enjoyable for you all the time or even just a lot of the time, or does it actually get to be a drag?  If the latter, do you still "love your job?"
  - Not trying to be crass or judgemental here, but is it the job you love, or the money you make that's the real lure?  Or maybe even the risk element, or the power you exert over us weak-willed males.

So there you have it...Sunday morning ramblings from a brain weary "older gent" who does truly enjoy the ladies, but questions, again sincerely, how they feel about what they do, about us and maybe even about themselves.  And for the record, since getting into the "hobby," (God that's a silly term!), I've only been with maybe half a dozen or so providers...so I have no wealth of experience.  I will say though, that most of the women I've met have been very nice people, in addition to being providers of a business service.

I really look forward to seeing some of the distaff side responses; it might actually give me more insight into this whole community thing.

Frankie

A worthy question.  Be interesting to see what you get in responses.  One thing is certain - I love watching a small handful do their job.

This question has been asked in many ways in many forums.  But stop and think about what you are asking the ladies to do.  For those ladies who honestly "love" what they do and respond, there will always be the naysayers who don't buy it and take the opportunity to attack the perceived deception.  For those ladies who honestly are in it only for the money and admit they have to provide oscar winning performances just to get through the day, wellllll...do you think the men are going to be flocking to schedule appointments?  This question puts the women in a no win situation and it's why in its many forms it rarely gets much of a response.  I agree the discussion would be interesting but there's too much risk to the women even if they post anonymously (we always figure out the latest TYJESUS reincarnations, don't we..lol?).

Great thought provoking question. People have different motivations for what they do. Hobbyists as well as providers. If we want to think we are making a connection besides simple animal sexual drive that is great. That's what makes this business so interestng,but many woman may not want to reveal their motivations for fear they may sound base.

some days you love it, some days you hate it.  Allot has to do with the people you came across that day.

"For those ladies who honestly are in it only for the money and admit they have to provide oscar winning performances just to get through the day, wellllll...do you think the men are going to be flocking to schedule appointments?"


Actually...yes.  C'mon, isn't performance what this is all about?  And not necessarily just sexual performance.  I know in my case, the whole "experience" is what matters...can I have a conversation with the lady; does she have a sense of humor; does she make me feel better about me; and on and on.  So if reviewers here give a consensus that the lady is all about these intangibles, and not just getting her client's rocks off, then "performance" or not, she'll get more than her share of business.   So maybe I'm naive, but I don't think there is a downside to my question as far as the ladies are concerned.  But that, of course, is their call to make.

Maybe another way to look at it, is to ask the guys why they go see a provider.  In some cases pure simple animal lust might be the answer, but if we're being honest, I think most of us are seeking more.  Let's face it, anyone of us could call on Rosy Palm for the release we need.  But clearly (to me anyway) we want more...be it companionship, a friend, a laugh or two or whatever.

I'm not sure how the foregoing "reasons to see providers" is germane to the discussion on whether or not providers really do "love their job," but I suspect there is a close tie-in.

Anyways, thanks for the responses thus far, and I really do hope the ladies aren't shy about chiming in here.

A calling if you may.

Unbeknownst to many, I have a real job that I concentrate on and do other menial things when the hobby is slow.  

Let's be all frank here and admit that money would be the #1 lure or otherwise we wouldn't be escorts (of course since I'm a little bit of a nympho, I would say the sex is too!)!  The GFE aspect of it makes it more personal.  I personally have developed real friendships out of the business with the gentlemen and ladies.  I talk to some of these people everyday!  

Anyway, I hope this answers your question and I hope to see you again Frankie!

S

-- Modified on 5/28/2007 7:08:15 AM

It was great seeing you the other day!!!  We should ALWAYS do lunch!

See you this week!

S

Leave it to you...I knew you'd be one of those honest/real people that I could count on an answer from.  That, despite the fact, that when I first read your header I thought it said "vacation."  To one classy lady: thanks for your input!

Frankie

I try to think of it this way... During most encounters with providers how often does the provider offer a 2nd cup of coffee???  If she does offer a 2nd cup, then IMHO, you may assume that she luv's her job more so than the majority. who can't wait to get it over with.

Even if she offers a 2nd cup, you can also assume that she geniuenely wants to provide top shelf service and will do whatever it takes to make sure the gentleman leaves happy and thus earning the probability to repeat business.

My opinion basically is that most women wouldn't choose to be providers given it's "underground" status, but do it primarily for the income, just like any other job.

Here is another spin.  I hope to retire within 1 or 2 years at most, and own a small business then.  I am getting older and we definitely have a shelf life in this business!  I have defied the odds just a little but believe when the time is right it would be disastrous not to give it up.  At the same time, I consider leaving my site up and only accepting dinner dates then as it has been the most honest adult social arena I have ever found.  I meet smart accomplished men who have treated me better than my ex-husbands (two of them).  But that probably speaks to the newness of things in new encounters. I have made friends that I love and can count on or visa versa that I am so grateful to know now.

Still, some days it is just like any other job.  It feels like...TIME TO MAKE THE DONUTS.....LOL

Or when you meet people who have BAD hygeine it really sucks.  That guy NEVER gets a second cup even if I think he will write a bad review.  But for the most part, I feel very gratified when I know I made someone feel wonderful.  Even someone who is having difficulty. There are so many other ways to deliver pleasure and make a guy feel great.  I never feel bad about myself when I have done that job well and it is clearly appreciated by the recipient.

I don't know if I would do this if I hadn't been dissapointed by serious years of work for non-profit social services and could not get past the 35K a year salary!  Then downsized and divorced the same year!  But I do know that I felt I was being raped on more than one occassion when working as an "honest" woman.  

That was degrading!

Hope this helps,

Jenni

Some women do it for:
1. some for only the money
2. some because they are nymphomaniacs
3. some for self esteem/confidence booster
4. some for affection
5. some for recovery
6. some to support family
7. some who feel this is their best talent
8. some ive even heard dont like men!

But just like yin and yang, men have their reasons for seeing providers:

1. some want a friend and companion
2. some dont get it from their wives or girlfriends
3. some have extra money for luxuries
4. some like compliments and treated like a king
5. some go after the gym...its for health reasons.

anyway, my point is, we can go on and on about reasons why why why she does it why he does it...but does it really matter?
what a hobbyist needs to only worry about is if she does a good job, is their a connection with her, is her place clean and comfortable, is she what you need for that moment?
and a provider shouldnt care why a man comes to see her, she just needs to know he is safe, kind, horny, and clean.
Getting into each other's heads and motivations is just not healthy here.
I can speak for myself. I am addicted to sex, i also love connecting to people, and i get along with men VERY WELL anyway we always have alot of fun. And my orgasms are very real, my affection is very real...
one of the most insulting moments of my life as a provider was when a "doubting thomas" hobbyist mentioned he was sure i faked an orgasm. he insisted all providers fake orgasms. I tried my best to convince him i hadnt, but if a man already comes to me negative and pessimistic...then no matter how great a job i do, how nice i am and how much i enjoy our time together,,,, he just wont allow himself to believe it.

My advice for you is to not wonder so much about what is in the provider's head or motivation for working. just care about if you connect with her, are having a good time, want to see her again...
leave your worries and stresses to the "real world" like your job and family and wives...we are not here to stress you, we are here to pamper you and give you a little vacation.
kisses, flora

Being on the opposited side of that event (my ex made 3x my salary, cheated on me and wanted to break into the kid's trusts!) give me a bit of perspective and some empathy for women with that story - and being victimized, well, it sucks... some women learn through the experience.... and control much of their destiny.  They also discover (well, some of them knew it all along) that they are very attractive and much desired by the men folk.

I apologize for the crudeness of this post... but let's face it, male -female relations - well sometimes they just suck!

I am selective and that really works well for us both.  I would say 82% of my time spent is most enjoyable.  If they don't know how to bring it out in me, I show them exactly how as to me, it's a date with a boyfriend who I am very uninhibited with  he always know when I am super turned on as I squirt!

xo
Octavia

I've only recently decided to get more information on this "hobby" and found Frankie's question not only insightful, but extremely helpful. For one reason or another I've continued to have hangups as to whether or not to act upon my increasing curiousity. However, after seeing a few of the women's responses I feel much more confident in going forward.

To the women who replied: You will likely be receiving business from this gentlemen in the near future.

Advanced degree in clinical psychology.  Did she play head games on me? maybe, all I know is I fell in love with her... really neat gal... we talked of everything... to this day, I will admit - I bring a lot of me to my meetings with providers... makes the sessions more real for me... and yes, I realize it is a fantasy.... but I do want the fantasy as close to reality as I can bring it....  that is how I have a good time... and that is how I get my vacation... fantasizing on what might have been....  for me, that is good.

Ive fallen in love a couple times with a client. its not always a fantasy. We are real people, living a real life, and true, the fantasy starts when you first see her pics and read reviews, but when you meet the girl and have a continuous connection, then I think the fantasy stops and then whatever you have is certainly genuine (to whatever degree you have; porn star, gfe, friendly, ect) Its when its mutual both ways that a relationship might start. She may have loved you back. Its very possible. Lots of providers have ended up marrying or being with one of their clients. I mean, its just so nice when we know a man knows everything about us, our "little secret job" and accepts it, plus he respected us enough to pick us out of thousands of working girls and come see us. To me that is impressive, and when there is a connection both ways, I think having a relationship with a client is a wonderful thing. We have feelings too, and your provider may have felt the same feelings for you. I think you can tell deep down inside if its mutual.
Celebrate the feelings she brought out in you. One thing I know is that a man will give more of himself when there is less demand on him to. We offer freedom, lots of space, unconditional affection, compliments, and good sex...I can see how you fell for her.

Thanks for a great response Flora, and whether deliberate or otherwise, I really wasn't intending to get into anyone's head.  Hell, this whole thread started only because I so often read: "I really love my work," and just wondered why that seems to be necessary to say.

But beyond that, you gave me one helluva look at a provider's thoughts and feelings.  And I will say I really like what I saw/read.  Without even looking at your pix (which, of course I did), it's easy to see why you're "world class" at your profession.

So thank you for sharing, and I certainly hope our paths do cross one day.  No doubt you're a first class lady!

Thank you for your perspective Bizzaro.  I have heard and seen sad stories on both sides.  

Your reference to "They discover"...funny because when I was the picture of young beauty was when I was the most insecure and inhibited. (And guys started offering me money at the age of 15, which shocked and mortified me).  I would wonder what was wrong with me!  But at the same time, deep down inside it would also arouse me. Due to messages women get as soon as they are born female there is alot of conditioning that just isn't right regarding expressing themselves honestly.  Most women in previous generations were oppressed immensely.  I know I had to shed tons of residue that began falling off in my late 30's.  Many of the women who men complain about here, never had permission to express themselves creatively in the area of sex.  The newer generation is much more liberated thankfully.  So, the term "Honest Women" is taking a turn (IMHO)for the better.  But with that, men are being victimized as a result more frequently.  Hopefully someday, the pendulum will fall in the middle, which is where we should be.  Embraced right in the middle with each other!

Jenni

-- Modified on 5/29/2007 11:43:19 AM

This turned into a very interesting exchange of thoughts, feelings and perspectives.....and no pot shots!!  I was wrong that you couldn't get a good response and I'll eat my words gladly since I enjoyed this thread very much!

Thanks Luv, to both you and Jenni.  And Jenni, thanks too for your thoughtful, clearly heart-felt response.  Funny, but I was a quite a bit down on TER after the Hawk/Chris debacle last week, but this thread proved me wrong.  This can be an advertising resource, a place for hobbyists to "shop," and also a damned good place for people to share and exchange thoughts, ideas and emotions.

Thanks to any and all who weren't shy about participating and opening up a bit!

Frankie