I have a few, I believe, but mostly the ladies just did it without me asking. If you want one, feel free to ask, but it is polite to also do a review for her. And I would focus on getting those referrals from ladies who like and will do a positive review for.
Yes, some ladies use them for screening. In practice they pretty much work like a provider reference. The new provider will either contact the provider or if your track record is good enough and she knows some of the ladies who have whitelisted you, she may accept it at face value. Or she may not accept it at all.
For providers and hobbyists alike, screening is a personal thing. The purpose is to keep us all safe, but of course most people do it only to the degree that it makes them feel safe, and that will vary.
So it does not hurt to have referrals, and will help at times. It also does not hurt to ask for them, but whether or not they are used and are sufficient will vary.
There is another whole discussion about whether or not it is wise for hobbyists to give providers their TER handle up front - a lot of guys prefer not to do so. Once you do that, a provider can screen you based on your reviews and posts, as well as any other information you give her. If your TER persona is that of a hard ass, this can cause problems. For other people, and I fall in this group, it helps. My posts and reviews do not hurt me, and ladies who make the effort (and a surprising number do so) have a very good idea what I like when we meet. Trust me, there is nothing quite like saying you loved something a lady did in a review, and in the middle of your next session, the lady does the same delightful thing even better without me saying a word.
Sometime this is a very happy world indeed.
zig
How do you get a provider on your whitelist for referrals? Do any providers us that for screening or do they prefer other methods?
I have a few, I believe, but mostly the ladies just did it without me asking. If you want one, feel free to ask, but it is polite to also do a review for her. And I would focus on getting those referrals from ladies who like and will do a positive review for.
Yes, some ladies use them for screening. In practice they pretty much work like a provider reference. The new provider will either contact the provider or if your track record is good enough and she knows some of the ladies who have whitelisted you, she may accept it at face value. Or she may not accept it at all.
For providers and hobbyists alike, screening is a personal thing. The purpose is to keep us all safe, but of course most people do it only to the degree that it makes them feel safe, and that will vary.
So it does not hurt to have referrals, and will help at times. It also does not hurt to ask for them, but whether or not they are used and are sufficient will vary.
There is another whole discussion about whether or not it is wise for hobbyists to give providers their TER handle up front - a lot of guys prefer not to do so. Once you do that, a provider can screen you based on your reviews and posts, as well as any other information you give her. If your TER persona is that of a hard ass, this can cause problems. For other people, and I fall in this group, it helps. My posts and reviews do not hurt me, and ladies who make the effort (and a surprising number do so) have a very good idea what I like when we meet. Trust me, there is nothing quite like saying you loved something a lady did in a review, and in the middle of your next session, the lady does the same delightful thing even better without me saying a word.
Sometime this is a very happy world indeed.
zig
I am a firm believer that your TER credentials are extremely important and matter a great deal in the process. It's why, in addition to sending an introductory E-mail or making a phone call, I always send the lady a PM. This way, she can review my white list references, check board posts and read my reviews. As Ziggy pointed out, some ladies will accept your white-list references as final screening, others may require additional information or references. Each lady runs her business differently.
I think if you have solid TER credentials (including a credible white list) at the very least it makes the lady want to continue the process of setting up an appointment. Remember, quality ladies will get many many E-mails requesting appointments, fishing for information, etc. If they receive an appointment request from a well established TER hobbyist (i.e. one with a lengthy review history, a solid board persona, and quality white list references), the lady will be more comfortable in continuing the process then she would be receiving a blanket E-mail from a random unknown gentleman. At lease your TER credentials tell the lady something about the hobbyist, and if they are solid credentials it gives the lady some peace of mind in the initial phases of setting up the date.
Credentials from a real screening service, such as P411 or RS2K, are what ladies always accept, not TER info. So if you want real credibility, pay for P411 and build some references there.
And, as I stated, there are a lot of guys on TER who hobby regularly and never share their TER info with anyone. So TER credentials can be useful, but they are not really important or necessary.
As I see it anyway,
zig
that is because so many ladies will WL anyone. When I give a white list, it is like my golden seal of approval. I won't just WL a guy for doing the basic things anyone with common sense should already do, like being clean, on time, and having the correct donation. I will however, provider a "reference" to men who do those things. If you have the word of a good provider, you don't need a white list.
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