How is the best way to discuss up front what you like without killing the mood?  Also, if you just want a CBJ when and how would be the best way to ask that so as not to again, kill the mood??

just be up front about your desires.  If nothing has happened yet, I doubt it's going to kill the mood.  After all, you're paying her to be 'in the mood' for whatever you want, not the reverse.

Swim

do you like?" once the two of you have settled the business portion.

....if they decide they want  CBJ (or know it's what they prefer) they usually just politely say so as we're getting started with the fun stuff. SOMETIMES it's not what you say but how.