I'm really sorry to read that you've been abused like this. The last thing you need to do is hurt a client, it get way too complicated, way too quick. BUT, if the client was too aggressive, you may have needed to defend yourself as A LAST RESORT. There is plenty of self defense training available for ladies. It may get complicated, but at least you'll be alive.
I hope you blacklist him.A regular of mine who I have seen a few times has become aggressive ... This week I saw him and like usual he said he wanted me to be in charge ... Ok .... But then he started putting his hands around my neck lightly. It surprised me but I thought no more of it than he was just very excited or trying to be sexy. Then all of the sudden he did it again but harder. I pulled his hands off my neck and said NO! 2 minutes later he had his hand on my mouth so hard that I could not breathe ... I pulled away but he did it again. I got up and he left. I will not see him again and would like to warn others.
Can someone send me the links to some blacklists or give me the names?
Thanks!
-- Modified on 8/10/2013 5:18:57 PM
That is a legit reason to blacklist someone. The problem with some blacklist sites is some providers use them to report trivial things like time wasters, and guys who write less than favorable reviews. Sometimes this hurts innocent people and also cheapens the blacklists and their real purpose of warning providers about dangerous guys, thieves, and LE.
In any case there are a bunch of them. Some are private, and some are public. You can find some just by googling. Maybe some providers will PM you with some private BL sites. some common ones that are not a secret and have been mentioned here before, are verifyhim and the NBL.
should post this thread there as well as your local board with "PM me for more information" so ladies will get in touch with you via the PM system.
So sorry this happened to you. You have been a breath of fresh air to TER. Just wish I was closer to MN.
That is, like, one of my biggest fears doing this. I'm glad you got out quick! Please share this info as much as possible in your area. The only black list sites I use are the ones mentioned.
Good luck to you.
Brilove, glad you're OK. I love getting excited when seeing my Provider. But I would never put my Hands around her Neck or over her Mouth. My Provider is way too Awesome to me that I would never think of harming her.
I simply do not understand the behavior you describe. And he continued after a NO. The "choking game" seems to be going around in the civie world... sometimes with fatal results! It's really great to climax with the room spinning for a second or 2... but I don't need to choke or be choked to do so.
You handled this unfortunate incident very well, & that's not easy. You are right to warn others.
Teens push another against a wall until passing out, and or compress the arteries at the neck. THIS IS NO GAME and has resulted in FATALITIES among teen-age children. The situation described seemed seconds away from going horribly sideways. DO NOT DO THIS. DO NOT ALLOW constriction of the neck or obstruction of air ways EVER!!!!! Ladies, break away, politely excuse yourself and LEAVE. Be gone before he knows you have left!!!!
Jonathan
You handled this unfortunate incident very well, & that's not easy. You are right to warn others.
This is no "game" to me either. I stated how dangerous it is. The provider must be firm with her safety but like all cases where she must discipline a client, she must do so firmly but without angering him & causing greater danger to herself. It is not easy. And not a place for anyone with low self esteem which can be exploited by a wack-job. Now, I'm gathering that he did allow her to leave, unmolested, after his bad behavior... which was good. You don't want to have to fight your way to the door or make a run for it.
I think pushing his hands away & saying NO was just right. After you've had a second to collect yourself & catch a breath. If I was a provider, I think I'd say "Don't make me tell you again!"
He NEEDS to respond to that likely with an "OK". I might even insist on an acknowledgement if he wants the action to resume. (Presume he does.)
And this is not just for breathing issues.
You are within your rights to keep the donation but your safety is more important. If you need to to get away, throw the money so it goes all over to cover your escape.
This is no different than Police, Soldiers, Firemen training, certain physical outdoor sports... in an emergency you need to have decided & even practiced on what to do. While the other party is thinking about what to do, you've put your plan in action. Once you decide to act, move decisively & you will be ahead of most any reaction.
Jonathan
You handled this unfortunate incident very well, & that's not easy. You are right to warn others.
Stand up while making an excuse to get up (like I need some water) then I called the front desk (I was in an upscale hotel). I asked them to come down and check something out right away. That's when he left. He was a regular and i had seen him about 4 to 5 times before so it was not usual behavior of his. If it would have been a situation such as maybe a new client or he got angry or more physical than I would have yelled help on the phone. But the way I handled it was a big clue to him that he needed to leave and it didn't look suspensions to the hotel.
I'm really sorry to read that you've been abused like this. The last thing you need to do is hurt a client, it get way too complicated, way too quick. BUT, if the client was too aggressive, you may have needed to defend yourself as A LAST RESORT. There is plenty of self defense training available for ladies. It may get complicated, but at least you'll be alive.
I hope you blacklist him.