Hey everyone... I'm new to this all, (good thing Im in the newbie board then I guess).

But, what should you say when you phone or email the provider. What can and cant be discussed? What should I expect?

-Totally Green
-Dionysus

-Never disuss any sex acts.  It's tacky.

-Be nice.  Treat her with respect.

-Tell her you want to see her, and when.  She'll ask you for any additional information she wants from you.

-Don't lie.  Most of us can't keep our story straight.  She won't do a fatal attraction thing to you, so you don't need to worry about her knowing your real name, etc.

-Be prepared to call several ladies, as you might have trouble finding one with free time.

I want to expand on what foo said about calling several ladies. I think that point can't be overstressed.  You may not only have trouble finding one with free time you may have trouble finding one to pick up the phone.  

I usually log about 10-12 names in my phone, call everyone listed and wait for a call back. Generally, the first one to call back wins.

Why can't we discuss sexual acts? Tacky or not, if I am going to pay for sex, then I want to make sure I am getting exactly what I am looking for...and I don't mean looks.

Well, if you were in a bar trying to get a woman to come home with you, would you say "Do you BBBJ?" to her?   Think of it that way.

Besides looking like a jerk for going into graphic detail, there's also the matter of sex for money is illegal, so when you ask about sex acts and talk about money, you've made LE's day.  This is why almost all providers refuse to discuss sex acts at all until you're both in the room and naked.

Look at her reviews to see if she does what you want.  Although there's no guarentee that she'll do them with you.  The reviewer may be lying, or she may only do a particular act with certain customers.

This is why one of the best hobbying strategies is to find a bunch of local ladies that'll rock your world, and then keep seeing them.  When you venture outside this circle, at some point you'll have a disappointing encounter.  Do it sometimes for variety but you have to expect that a certain porition of your encouters won't rock your world.

Thanks for the tips!

-D

That's all cool but since you're a newbie, let me add a couple of other caveats.

Be prepared for some of the most fantastic sex as well as some of the most blatent rip-offs of a lifetime. This is afterall the sex business and there are some very dark-sided people involved in it.

A provider may show up and look nothing like her photos or she may smell bad and be dressed tacky. Or worse, they will lead you on to believe you'll get everything you want, but once the money has changed hands she will suddenly be stricken with moral idignation and act like you're a jerk because you want to "have sex" which is illegal. In other words, look but you cannot touch. Or what's called "cash and dash"!

Most, and I mean close to 99% of all providers will not discuss anything with you on the phone. If you say anything many of them will hang up on you. And at least 50% of them will not discuss anything with you once you're in the same room. They all are convinced that every one of us could be a vice cop and even just saying you'll agree to "sex for money" is a crime in most states. Generally you can ask but don't be surprised if on your first session with her she won't say anything, yes or no. If you start to nibble on her clit and she doesn't stop you then it's okay. But I have found that asking if you can go down on her will usually send warning signs to her and she'll clam up. A few providers I know were not like this, but the vast majority are paranoid as hell with you at least the first time.

A few other pointers, Unless you know her well, never let her leave the room with your money until after the session is over. Why some gals think it's necessary to take the money out to their car before the session has started is beyond me but there are those who will try it. I had a gal insist she needed to go to her car to retrieve the dress I asked her to wear. Once she was out the door, that was the last I saw of her and my money.  Never allow the girl's driver to have any contact with you unless they are asking for directions to your meeting place. A driver who insists on coming in or collecting the money is up to no good and you're probably about to be robbed or scammed in some way. And don't be surprised if she refuses to allow you to touch her. As I said, many girls will try this acting like tons of guys pay her just to sit around in her underwear and talk to them at a distance. Heck, if we wanted phone sex why would we go to the trouble of setting up a session.

And I will stress this point once more. I cannot tell you how many times I've had all the signs that everything was going to be just right. Then some georgeous lady shows up and acts like it's a perfectly natural thing for me to give her $300 to spend ½ hour sitting around my hotel room allowing me to "think" about having sex with her but no touching in anyway. A lot of good providers I've talked with act like this just cannot be and seemed very surprised to hear this kind of thing goes on. But belive me this is a common occurence. Once she has your money it's very difficult to get it back should things go wrong. This leaves a man in a very vulnerable state and unless you're prepared to use force to take it back, which I do not recommend, you're SOL. Because, as it has been with us guys for centuries when it comes to sex, she holds all the cards.

Have fun, but be weary and watchful. This side of life is not all that Hollywood shows it to be.

Leave a meaningful message that is worthy of being responded to. For example:

Where you saw the listing,
Time you would like to meet,
A bit about yourself (height, weight, build, race/ethnicity, career)

Just be "conversational", respectful, confident but not arrogant. Answer all questions.

Never mention any sex acts, not even in "code" like full service or all inclusive or "languages". If you use TER and have read the reviews, you already know what to expect (standard YMMV disclaimer applies).

That's what TER is for, so you can see what others have experienced and know what to expect. If you ask about specific acts, they will almost always say no and hang up. Try it sometime and you'll see. It's for the lady's legal protection. You don't have to like it but that's the way it is.

"She won't do a fatal attraction thing to you, so you don't need to worry about her knowing your real name, etc."

This little nugget goes down in history as some of the worst advice ever. There is no reason to divulge your real name. Never, ever.

Maxsmart was right on with this post...great pointers for newbies.  As with anything else in life you are bound to stumble a few times before you get things right.

I agree and disagree with capybara...it depends on the way things work where you live.  If you are trying to get an appointment with a reputable provider, at least where I live, then you better be prepared for some reference checking by the provider.  I've even been "carded" by providers that show up.  Just think of her reaction when she goes to check into who you say you are (and trust me there are plenty of ways) and you lied.  I guarantee you will get no date from her.  If she happens to show up and figure out you lied...have fun at that point.  On the other hand you can find just as many providers that don't care who you are as long as you have the donation ready the moment she steps in the room.  In my experience this type of provider is usually the one that will rip you off or will end up screwing you over somehow.  But, as with every post on here...its just a matter of personal experience.  If you have so much to lose by divulging your name then maybe you better think twice about seeing a provider because you probably won't be able to see a reputable provider (and have a great experience) without being honest and giving her the info she requests.  I've made the mistake in the past of lieing about my name and such.  Now I just choose my providers more carefully and honestly answer the questions.  Good luck to all the newbies.

T.

I prefer to be contacted via email, be friendly, give a little personal info about yourself, as well as the day and time you were thinking of setting up an appointment for.
Emails that are rude or explict get deleted immediately. Callers that are rude or simply call and say "how much" are not seen as well.

Phone manner and email reflect alot about how the person will treat me in session.

Sweetness and consideration go a looooong way! Treat the provider as you would a first date, and all will go smoothly!
Good luck!

Sorry, a newbie but wanted to post on this thread. there's smart people respondng here. 'm heading for my first, with a well referenced providor. We've talked on the phone a couple times and have set a time, but we didn't set the amount of time. I want two hours and hope when I get there she hasn't scheduled me just an hour. Is it lame to call them again to elaborate? I don't want to be a pain.  Thnx.

Wow...   I  am  starting  to feel  like  Mr  SMOOTH!  

I  am still a  newbie,  but  when  I  sent  emails  to ladies introducing myself, I gave  them  my  name....  
YES, REAL NAME!  description, told  them  a  little about  myself,  and  sent  a  picture.  THEY are  the  ones  at significant  risk.  You read  their  reviews  on TER, or TOB?  Well  then  you  KNOW  what to expect,  don't  you?  I provided  as  much  information as  possible... to  identify  myself  and  put  them  at  ease  and  I  am  treated like  the  most  romantic  thing  since  room service and  bubble baths.

If  your first  contact  with  a  girl: you ask, "are you available?... Can I cum in your mouth?"  and  trying  to  negotiate  down the  donation.....  Good Lord....  Some guys  should  stick  to  bar hags  and blow  up dolls!