I guess I'm getting more paranoid as time goes by, but with all the screening required (and I'd be scared sh*tless of anyone who didn't screen) how can one not give their real name?

you may very well have to give up your real name, so they can verify that you are not LE.  Yeah, it sucks, but that's the reality of this enterprise.  I suggest you search your area for some newbie friendly providers who screen very lightly, so you can get your foot in the proverbial door, so to speak.  The alternative is to contact an agency, they usually are somewhat lighter on their screening, from what I have read, not always, but sometimes.

Another alternative is join a verification service like DateCheck,  Preferred411, or RoomService2000.  Yes you may have to give them your real name, but that will avert you from giving it directly to a provider.

Swim

But here's some more...take it for what it's worth.

You can hobby for years and never give anyone your real name but it WILL limit the ladies who will be willing to see you and, in my opinion, ladies who don't screen well are at risk for getting busted, you might be there when it happens.

I've used my real name for years. I've never had a problem. Does that mean I never will? Who really knows but I'm pretty careful and I like my odds.  

References can be fleeting.  I've been in the hobby for years but my two current regular gals are both UTR and won't give references.  If I want to see a new girl I have to be prepared to give out my info. Also, agencies generally want real-world information as well.  I've used many and never have I not been asked to give my real name and phone number at the very least.

It's your decision to make.  Nothing is without risk.

but yes, I have been hobbying for decades and have given my real name to countless providers with no ill consequences, but let me qualify my statement by saying that I am single, self employed and basically "blackmail proof"

That said, I still have had no provider ever even attempt to use any info she had against me. I would say the chances of a provider using your real name against you are not large, but I will say it does happen, and more frequently than many of us would like to admit in instances where you and the any of the ladies you patronize ever become enemies.

I guess I haven't really given any advice here, so no charge. lol

There is no shortage of providers who screen using references only. I don't know where this idea got started of giving out your real name, but it's dangerous and totally nuts, IMO.

Think with the head that's on your shoulders, not the one on your dick.

What boggles my mind are the ones who ask for your real name, home address, work info etc IN ADDITION TO references and date check (or other screening service) ID.  And as if that ain't enough, some even ask that you show your driver's license when you meet them.  It was my assumption that the purpose of a screening service was to reassure a provider that a client was safe WITHOUT  the client having to tell every single provider he meets that he's really John S Doe, assistant manager of the produce department at the Winn Dixie on 5th and Main.

This is a fantasy visit. As long as you have some form of references or other items I can use for screening (some which you may not directly provide to me or even realize as usable as screening tools for creating a trail on you) I don't care what your real name is. There are certain things I am looking for while screening and many times after a few back and forth emails I can tell if I will see you whether you provide references to me or not. Even if you tell me it is your real name how would I really know unless I had used other personal means (driver's license, etc) to screen you. Furthermore, after our visit I would actually have to remember your real name which is slim unless we chatted or visited on numerous occasions.  More likely I would remember your forum board handle

Have fun and Play Safe!

Summer

I don't really care about your real name.  But can you please give me the name you used with other providers?  I know, you guys are afraid that I will fall in love and stalk you, if you give me your real name.  Just kidding!  I really do understand that you don't want to give your real name, just as I use an alias in this business.  I only ask that you quit changing it up, by thinking of more and more clever aliases.  


Example;   John Doe contacts me and gives me 3 references, and he gives me his phone number.  I contact these references and one says, "I saw a John Doe last week, he was great, but the phone number and email you just gave, doesn't match",  another reference replys "I saw Jack Doe, who called me on that number, but the name and email don't match."  And yes, you guessed it, the third reference replys, "I saw a James Doe that used that email, but not that name and phone number."   John Doe, finally pm's me on TER with his handle, he is whitelisted by all his references!  Same guy, different names, phone numbers and email addresses!   He's a great guy!  I see him and we have a lovely time!  He asks, "will you give me a reference if I need it?"  I reply, "Yes!  Not only will I give you a great reference, I will whitelist you also!"  Two weeks later, I get contacted by provider for a reference request, "Have you met with Jack Doe Doe? His phone is 555-555-5555 and his email is [email protected]"   I have no record of this gentleman, so I reply, "No I have not met with him."   An hour later, I get a nasty private message from John Doe, asking why I wouldn't give him a reference after I said Iwould!

Please, if you are going to use a fake name, stick with it!   Be consistant so that we can screen you.  That's all I ask.  

Love to screen,
Laina

RS2k doesn't have an ID# like the others. So, you have to give out the name used for your RS2k verification (your real name), your (hobby) cell phone, and the residence town and state on your ID to a provider. Hence, it's not a service that will avoid having your name thrown out there.

I typically request your first and last name, and there is a reason not just for my own personal safety which is of course why we screen but lets say John Doe decides he would like to see me. He provides his name, he has references, his cell and email, wow great guy. Session goes great and at the end he walks out, I go to check his envelope which he has left in plain view and realize I've been jipped. Yup John Doe with all his info and all his references has just ran out and didn't pay the check. So what resort is left for us girls? You guys have TER where you can write reviews and bash us to all hell and back if we provide shitty service, rip you off, have fake pics, etc, etc, etc. We can do the same to some respect if you use date-check, p411 or like services, but that's if you use those and most of you don't. We have no way to leave you a negative comment only positive white list referrals on ter. What we do have is your info and you bet your ass that if you screw us over we are going to post it on every black list board, every ladies only board and send an email to all our lady friends in the business so we can let whoever we possibly can on the few resources we have that your scum, a rip off, a jerk whatever the case may be.

Now besides bashing me what does all this have to do with giving you my name you ask? well references really only go so far. When I receive info on references if I don't know the girl there really isn't any way for me to know that she is totally legit or that she even bothered to screen you to begin with. So I make sure to cover all my bases. Because I need to be safe not just so I don't get busted by LE but so I don't see dicks who might rob me, beat me up or worse kill me. Cause yeah there are those out there.

The girls who screen harder are less likely to get busted because they are more careful about who they see, do you want to risk being in the room when that girl who doesn't properly screen has LE knocking on her door? We are ALL at risk, whether it's you giving your info out or us taking a chance on you and praying your not LE, you just have to decide what your most comfortable with and what your willing to miss out on, cause some pieces of ass out there are worth the screening. =)

Love,
Jasmine

Who told you not to give your real name? If you are seeing a provider who screen and you give her a FAKE name you will either be blacklisted or you will never see her....ever

If you see will reviewed, reliable providers then there is no cause for concern about giving your real name. Another option is a verification site. An even better option is to see VERY well reviewed providers and ask to use them as references.

And yes, be scared shitless about anyone who doesn't screen throughly.