I had my first ever session last night and I was so nervous we never really got very far. I wanted to talk for a while before beginning (to kind of get to know her and settle the butterflies) but we didn't do much more than talking before time flew by. I did have a good experience but I left pissed off and embarrassed by how I wussed out. Has this ever happened to anyone before? What do you suggest for easing into the hobby? Thanks for the help!

Bear in mind, the provider is just as nervous as you are and she didn't want to do anything too aggressive lest she scare you off.  She also probably felt just as bad about the situation because she, if she is a good provider, wants you to be happy.

I think you should try again, only be a little more up front about how you want things to go.

The nervousness will fade, at least enough so that you can feel like you're getting your money's worth from the time.

I was pretty nervous my first two visits but the gals led the way and we definitely got past the talking quickly.  In fact my experience the first couple visits until I had good references on me is that the providers want you naked fast to help assure them you aren't le.

But my third visit I has learned about the vip part of reviews and found ladies that were very well recommended on GFE and my next two visits were a lot of fun and really solved the nervousness.

I felt the same, but I was lucky that the provider I was with was a tad bit more aggressive than I was. I would just email her and set up another appointment asking her to lead you into it a little more. I am sure after she has her tongue in your mouth and her hands all over your groin you will have no problem taking things from there.

b-

I also get very nervous with  a first appointment with a lady.  I think it's ok to tell her you are nervous, and that will help her to take the lead.  Most likely, you will get less and less nervous as you have more appointments.  Try to relax, and once things are going past the talking part, feel free to express what you would like to do.  Things will  probably go well at that point. Hang in there, and have fun!

I think nervous is normal. Even in my younger, carefree days the action didn't progress as fast as it does in a hobbiest/provider relationship. I have found one lady that I have seen more than once and I can tell you that your nervousness goes away when you are going to see an "old friend". She feels more relaxed too.

"If any o' you boys don't feel no butterflies right now, there's somethin' wrong with you!"

As others have said, we all feel a little nervous. As you gain experience in the hobby you feel less nervous, and you'll feel less nervous on repeat visits to the same lady.

That said, I would never want to completely lose the butterflies.  On some level, it is just excitement, and this is supposed to be an exciting hobby.  

It is also possible that, on that one occasion, you really needed to sit and chat with a pretty girl more than you needed to get laid.  When I feel that way, I go to a strip club.

I am nervous when I meet new friends.. Never really know until things heat up..

I have had several Gentlemen who where very nervous.. It was there first time to cross a gender variant line (I am post op).. Sometime they have gone real well, they return.. But on the other side of the coin I have had a couple wam-bam and RUN..

It is quite understandable.. If the chemistry is not there it is no good for either him or I.. Some people like the edge others my try and it is not for them..

No one likes all the flavors at the 31+ flavor ice cream place, same applies in this hobby..

I do also get nervous (each and every time), And I've been with close to 200 women overall in this craft (alot before this website was built .. I wish it was here 12 years ago.)

I find booze helps me, though I can't reccomend it for everyone, as it is a performance decreaser. Though I say don't get wasted, just get buzzed so you can sort of open-up. It's the same principle of dating...where you get drinks to loosen up and open yourself up.

Consider yourself a 'thrillseeker' your not different than someone that bungie jumps, quads, or skydives (in other words -- don't be ASHAMED of what your doing,,revel in it..)

. This is scary shit. But if you see it as your the adventorous thrillseeker, it builds confidence. The average guy has never even DONE what your about to do. Book a porn star , who do you know that's fucked a porn star... you've got to put it in the light of a new-found adventure. I'm an underground emcee (hip-hop artist), so that rush I get when I jump on stage and rock a crowd - it's the same deal . . its a rush, you are a mountain-dew chugging adventurer, grab it by the horns buddy.

Find a provider with 8/9/10's and / or porn star and challenge HER to please YOU. Shes not going to date you , shes not going to love you, shes not going to giggle about how awful you were to her friends (even if she doesn you dont know her..) shes going to please you and hug you and send you on your way, so stop having a conscience about it!

and go from there!






-- Modified on 1/6/2008 2:13:16 AM

Thank you to everyone who replied. I have visited another provider since my first disasterous one, and things went great! I found a provider that was more experienced and told her I was a little shaky. She put me at ease with a glass of wine, we talked for about a half an hour, then she "changed the way I see the world" It was AWESOME! I would have given up if it weren't for all the encouragement and advice everyone gave. Big thanks to everyone that helped! Aaron