I'm a newb who's been trying since Halloween to initiate contact with a first provider.  Yesterday was my third try (meaning third provider I've emailed or called).

I made sure to contact them by their preferred method and if they didn't have one, then to try by both phone and email.  I don't think I've said anything "wrong" in my messages either so I'm wondering why I have'nt gotten any responses yet.  

So what's the "average" number of provs that newbs contact before someone finally responds to them?  Also how often should I try to initiate contact per prov?  I've only sent first messages and haven't tried again with any of them (well actually I did try calling the third one again today but didn't bother leaving a message this time).  Once every 2 days or something if I really want to meet them?

Seriouly, for a newbie it's not all that unusual.

Have you tried any agencies?  They are easier to start with usually.

Also, have you gotten signed up on a screening servie like Room Service?  If not, why?

Are you under 30?  If so, that's a strike against you.

Only try to reach them one more time.  After that, they will get annoyed enough to black list you with others, and you don't want that.

Keep swinging!

I've heard that pigs are often interested in agencies so I'm a little agency-shy.

Speaking of which....do provs not like emails with fake user names (e.g. "Red Eye") even thought I tell them my real name in the email?  Should I start using an email account with my real name as my user name?

I remember visiting a couple of screening service sites but they asked for prov. references as well so I figured what's the point?

No, but that's interesting to know....do most provs, regardless of age, not like >30s?
However, I'm not very.....experienced with women.  I don't have much luck with them which is why I'm turning to this "subculture".  Needless to say it would really suck to not be able to hook up with someone I'm interested in even if I paid them!

Well, I hope the 2nd time's the charm....the number of girls that're "suitable" for me isn't that large.
So does that second phone call (w/o message though) I made today count as a "second time"? This third prov's my "primary choice" so I'm really hoping to hook up with her.

i second the thought on signing up for rs2k of one of the others.  never had an issue when i put rs2k member in my email or contact.

All they ask for really is employer information which I'm either willing to or have already provided.  This last one I tried to contact even told newbs on her site to just contact her and that we'd take it from there.

Also, do provs have to be RS2K members themselves to use RS2K to check up on hobbyists?

If providers aren't responding, then either you're saying something wrong in your initial emails, or you're contacting providers who aren't interested in seeing new clients, or you're just have a bad luck streak.

Make sure your initial email is friendly, confident and indicates you're welling to be screened.

Just remember that sometimes, you have to run before you can walk, which means that if you can't supply provider references, that may limit who you may be able to see initially.  But many providers have alternative screening methods.

That could be your main problem.  You have to be very business like, friendly is OK, but don't use aliases.  It makes them nervous.

The screening agencies like RS2K are only interesting in your work reference.  Do you have a regular type of job where you can be screened?  If not, that's a problem as well.

Under 30 is a problem with many providers.  This makes it especially important to be very proper in all your communications with them.  You have to be honest and give them your real age (They will check.), but try to sound as mature as a thirty-something, even if you aren't.

Calling and not leaving a message is another black mark.  Forget about that one altogether.

Just a question:  Have you read the Newbie Manual that is linked on this page?

If not, please do so now.

Have you given her the basic information?  Do you have a secure phone?  Secure e-mail?  For her to contact you.  Did you specify it is OK to leave a message.
I'm attempt a polite second call a couple of days after she's had a chance to check you out.
skb

need to be more specific than "Hey babe, I want to meet you next Friday.  Can I make a date?"

The "fake user name" OP was referring to was his e-mail addy, like [email protected].  He went on to say that he provided his real name in the text of the mail.
Sounds like SOP to me.

I was thinking in terms of a fake name, not the TER handle which is more than OK.

To OP:

Do consider the fact that some hobbyist do not like to give out their TER handle as it inhibits them from writing truthful reviews.

Most hobbyist don't care, but you might want to consider the pros and cons first.

If you limit yourself in the beginning, before you really have a chance to try out the hobby, you might overlook a girl who could turn out to be your ATF.

Really?  Even for a very first call/email?
Because I'm not really sure exactly when I'd like to meet whoever would finally respond, but I thought we could at get preliminary stuff out of the way.

Are provs really that much of a stickler for dates and times even for first messages from newbies?

Well actually, my fake name shows up in the "from" column as well.

So for example, the email I used was like "[email protected]" With "Red Woof" showing as my name.


I was wondering about that, that's good to know.
I'll use a "real" email acct. from now on.

"Calling and not leaving a message is another black mark.  Forget about that one altogether."
Really?  Aww fuck....she was one I'd really like to meet.
Maybe after a few months she'll forget and I can try again?

"Just a question:  Have you read the Newbie Manual that is linked on this page?"
Yes, but it didn't address these issues that I've run across, like how many and often a newb has to send out messages until a prov finally responds.

Well....OK I guess I'll post one of my emails (with personal info edited out or altered of course) as an example so people can see what, if anything, is wrong with them:

AN INITIAL EMAIL:
SUBJECT: Newbie who wants to meet you (sorry for the stupid name)

MESSAGE:...it was meant to be "Fake Name" but I guess I hit the wrong key and "email provider" apparently won't let me fix it.

Anyway...hi "*****" I'm "Real First Name"!  I called and left a voicemail shortly before this email.
As I've said, I'm a newbie and would like to meet you late next month if possible.
Because I'm a newb however, I don't have references and would like to know what you'd like me to do.

My cell# is ***-***-****.  You can call at anytime.
My email (well, it should show already I guess but in case it does'nt) is:

"email address"

I hope to hear from you soon!

-Real First Name (AKA "Fake Name".....yeeeesh!
END EMAIL

And this was to a prov who simply told newbs via her FAQ page to just "contact me and we will go from there".
She also didn't state a preferred means of contact.

Well, I guess it's several things.  I look at what they're willing to do, their rates, how many and how recent good reviews they've got in TER, and driving distance.

And yes, admittedly, how they look as well as what kind of personality they portray themselves to be on their ads or websites.