i'm brand new to this and making my first waves in the community. i've contacted a number of well-reviewed providers in the boston area, by e-mail as suggested in their profiles, but haven't heard back from any of them!

am i doing something wrong? what information should i be providing them on the first e-mail contact? should i be calling instead?

thanks!

They will NEVER write you back to say "no".  Follow the first up with a second after a couple of days.  If she still doesn't respond she is either not interested or on vacation.  Just gotta move on until you find someone willing to get your cherry.

Your initial contact should be via whatever method she requests.  You should be polite and forthcoming.  Tell her that you have never visited an escort before, request a specific time and date, and offer to supply whatever work info she requires to verify you.

PF said it right. Just know it happens to everyone. It isn't personal, so many things can be a factor. A very low volume provider who has enough clients, or someone who is really popular (thus really busy), or someone who travels alot are all examples of lots of missed emails.

Just keep going, stay truthful and open. You will find someone eventually.

b-

That is sound advice above! I was only until very recently a newbie too, and had the usual difficulties at first.

The most important thing, in my opinion, is to be open and honest in your communications. Remain professional but dont be afraid to let you're personality show a little either. Trust is the pivotal factor - establish it and everything else will just fall into place!

Ive also begun to suspect that many providers get a LOT of email everyday - and can only imagine how much time is involved in responding to them all.

Rock, the person who has become my ATF did not return my first email inquiry.  I waited two weeks then called her and was able to make my appointment.

As I got to know her, I asked why she had not responded.  She told me I had asked for a specific date and she was busy on that date and the days before and after.

I think a lot of it has to do with their scheduling.  My advise is to not give up or you may lose out on someone very special.

Remember, they WANT to see us.

Good luck.

and I'm not saying that you said anything untoward, but to just be sure, go over this check list and be sure it's not you.

1. Did you read the entire site of the provider and give them all information requested?

2.  Did you refrain from making any references to sexual activities?  (This one is the biggest no-no there is.)

3.  Have you read the TER Newbies Manueal above for information on how to contact them?

4.  Did you proof your email for grammar and spelling?  (Yes, they do count.)

5.  Did you refrain from giving them too much information?  (Don't write your autobiograph, in other words.)

If you can answer yes to all of the above then rest assured, a response will only be a matter of time.

you may want to try an agency first.  They are usually easier to communicate with, and will screen you rather quickly.  There are a lot of great agencies in Boston, like RSG, Visiting Girlfriends, and Charming Friends, just to name a few.  

Take a look at the Boston Board and check out their posts - they each post about once a week with schedules and site links.  You can check the reviews of the providers from each agency by finding one and clicking on the phone number in the profile.  

An Agency is a great place to start because they can probably meet a more varied schedule, will screen you quickly, and you can then start getting some reviews on TER that you can point an Independent to as part of the screening if you don't mind them having your TER handle.

Good luck

Good point on grammer .
 Just saying you would enjoy her company would be ok but not sexually explicit.

Well, unless you wrote something inappropriate, asked for an appointment for less time than their minimum, are younger or older than their age guidelines, or asked for an incall (when they only offer outcall) or vice versa, you should hear back from them.  Also check their site to see if they require prescreening in your initial contact.  If their site states this as a requirement, they may not respond to requests that do not contain the information they require!

SINfully sinthia

Thanks! This is what makes this community so great!

So, in my first e-mail, do I give my real name, real phone number, etc.?

also, do you e-mail directly from your work/real e-mail?

does anyone use "fake" e-mails (through gmail, etc.)  and fake names until you get to the verification process? or just cut to the chase and be real...

worried about giving too much away without knowing if the provider is legit or discreet enough...

thanks!

Attempting to lie first and tell the truth later as another newbie hobbyist confessed to a few weeks ago is a horrible idea.

Your mutual goal in your inital exchange of e-mails is to establish a mutual comfort level, nothing breeds distrust faster than a lie.

you do not have anything to worry about.  She wants the information to make sure you are safe, not for any other reason.

However, if your life situation is such that you are hiding the Hobby from a SO or wife, then you will want to get a throw away phone (search for similar posts below) so that you can give that number.

Good Luck

It drives me nuts when I respond to an e-mail and the client is upset that I did not, only to find out that it was sitting in their junk mail folder???

I was a newbie about a year ago, so I know the problems of getting to see an independent provider when having no other provider references, etc.  I would never use a work or home ISP-based email account to contact providers; it leaves too much of a permanent trail.  I contact providers using a web-based account (gmail, yahoo, hotmail, etc.) and my real name.  In my initial email, I usually tell them a little about my outside interests (without going into too much detail that makes it a life history!) and compliment them on their pictures, reviews, or whatever got me interested in seeing her.  That is in addition to the standard info like requesting a particular time, and a potential back-up time, if she is unavailable for your first choice.  If you are contacting an out-of-town provider, you might say in general terms why you are visiting her city; convention, to see a sports event, visiting relatives, etc.  Anything to get her comfortable that you are not a stalker!

I also use another web-based account with a fake name to post to the yahoo groups that a number of providers and agencies use to post up-to-date information on times and locations, etc.  No need for anyone to know your real name but the provider and/or agency, for verification purposes.  You will likely never get verified using a fake name.

Regarding your last question, if you are "worried about giving too much away without knowing if the provider is legit or discrete", then you have not done enough research at TER before sending your email.  I have only contacted well-reviewed providers whom I have confidence will be discrete with the info I provide.

You certainly shouldn't take it personally if a girl doesn't get back with you. But I can understand your frustration and I personally feel that providers should at least do the courtesy of returning messages with a simple response that turns down the offer. Unless your a provider that really does get hundreds of responses to their ad every week, which I doubt most girls get with the exception of PS and other high profile providers, it is just a good courtesy.

Sometimes providers change email addresses and you really wonder if the girl even got the message. I wish you good luck with independents, you really are up a sh*t creek without any references--very frustrating...

how true is it that agencies destroy your private information after a frist date?

you hear all these stories of agencies getting  busted and LE grabbing their "lists" of hobbyists...

I am a middle-aged executive (6'1", 200) visiting your area during the last week of Feb.  I am looking for an incall appointment on Wed. afternoon, Feb. 26 at 3 p.m.  I can provide references.  Contact me at [email protected].  

Also, note some providers prefer you to complete the form on their web site.

If you don't hear back in 3-4 days move on.

keystonekid,

i can tell that you're an executive--your example answers all my questions in just a few sentences.

I tell them to respond and say ,Let me know what develops or Let me know how to proceed.
I have gotten most girls to respond back when you say somehing like that or just please let me know .Make it simple and to the point.

Just remember the lady may be viewing mail on some portable devise...  impossible to read & understand long messages