Your social skills have obviously not progressed to normality as you think. You are still in the shell to a degree.

Forgive me for saying this, but I think losing your virginity to a provider is very sad. When one loses their virginity it will be a memory that you carry for life. I was very young (15) and I remember that day vividly.
What are you going to say the next time you are with some pals and the subject is brought up? Say, "yeah, I paid $350 to lose my virginity" Again that is sad when you think about it.

BTW, providers are "real girls". That statement alone tells me that your social skills remain stunted. Go out and lose your virginity with some dignity and that will bring you some confidence in yourself.

Come back and enjoy the hobby at a later point in life.

Hopefully I'll get some serious responses back.. But I am a 25 yr old virgin and just stumbled on this site. Honestly, doing something like this has always crossed my mind but I wasn't sure of a 'safe' way to go about doing it. I have a two reasons why I want to do this: 1) I would like to finally remove myself from the label of being a virgin, 2) I don't want avoid looking like an idiot doing it with a real girl (that I actually like) for the first time. I figure I get some practice in?

But as a virgin, do you guys think it's worth it for me to spend the money on a service? I can't imagine that I'd last very long and I'm worried about "looking like an idiot" in front of a professional. Any input would be appreciated.

P.S. If you're wondering how I'm 25 and still a virgin it's because it kinda took me a while to get out of my shell growing up. I was very shy and really just kept to myself until college. I eventually did open up and feel like I'm a very 'normal' person now, but when it comes to girls I'm always hesitant to take it to the next level because I know the girl has more experience than me and I again I don't want to look like an idiot. I also don't want to admit that it would be my first time. I figure getting the 'virgin' part out of the way this way would help.

If you don't have VIP membership here yet, you should get it, first of all.  Search for providers in your area that advertise they are 'newbie friendly'.  Trust me, if you find the right provider, you will not look like and idiot, she will know how to handle you.  There are many out there that are experienced with guys in your situation.  I think your biggest hurdle is your age, not your virginity.  You want a more mature provider and many of them do not see guys as young as you.  In light of that, it might take you a while to find someone.  
I do strongly recommend that you be totally honest with the providers you contact.

You might consider contacting some of the reviewers in your area to get some suggestions as to ladies to contact.  If you have not read the self-help manual yet, do it soon.  There is a lot of good information about contacting providers in there.  Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.

Swim

go for it!  IMO, you need to get that "first one" out of the way.  Remember, sex is like any other endeavor, practice makes perfect and you probably will need some practice to become a good lover to civies.  So go out there, rub your nose in some pussy and enjoy the scent of a woman.  If you are anything like me, you will never look back. Also, the nice thing about seeing a provider is that you do not ever have to see her again if you make a fool of yourself, which is highly unlikely anyway.  Finally, do not worry about how long you last, you will be using a rubber which will decrease sensitivity.  If you are worried, just jerk-off (aka: make love to your hand) a few times before going to visit the provider. Also, providers are professionals and have seen and experienced everything under the sun.  It is highly unlikely that you will stick out in their mind, unless of course, you are a great lover like me (lol).

I don't see anything wrong with it, as long as you have thought long and hard about it, and it's something you want to do. We have seen virgins before, so it's nothing new to us. You won't look like an "idiot" & I've actually had some virgins last quite awhile. If not, go for round 2 or 3! Most virgins,(heck, even guys who aren't, but it's their 1st time seeing a provider) are extremely nervous, so once again, it's nothing new to us

I would wait until you find a girl that you at least have some kind of connection with. And there's nothing wrong with looking like an idiot. My first time was like that. Fumbling around in the dark. Not sure how to put it in. Laughing with the girl because we just couldn't figure it out right away. It's one of the best memories of my life and I'd hate to see you miss out on that.

You may be surprised how many girls in your age range are also virgins. Pick one you like, get some alcohol, and have fun!  

...'mrfisher' has responded to all three threads.

You should pay attention to the responses of 'johngaltnh'. These are some of his shorter posts, lol.



-- Modified on 11/25/2011 2:27:52 AM

I too lost my virginity to a provider at a much later age than you. Ignore the judgmental comments saying it is "sad". Maybe for some it is really easy, but if your personality is shy/introverted then your chances are very slim at getting a women attracted to you... To me that is sad, because it does not matter how good a person you are. So do what you have to do. There is absolutely no shame in it. You will definitely be happier afterwards!

I wish when I was younger I had explored sex with providers before I really started dating.  I would have had a lot more confidence, and if you think about it you can make a LOT more rational choices dating when the drive for sex is removed as a major factor (after all, even if your date does not result in sex you have other options).  

Even if you have a bad experience to start with, the provider will generally not care and in fact will probably try to be supportive and help you.  Try perhaps a few times and a few different women and figure out mentally how to hold back (if in fact that's even an issue).

Confidence builds on confidence and it can only help to get some experience from someone who really knows what they are doing.

Just make sure you stay safe (though that's true having sex with anyone).

see a provider.  Make sure your upfront with the lady and honest.  Also might be a good choice if you find a more mature provider rather than a young one.

Thats just an opinion coming from a 22 year old.

I agree with all the comments so far supporting your going forward with this and would add only the following: re coming too quickly, there's no such thing with a provider.  Don't jerk off first, just book a session of at least an hour.  Then, if you pop after ten minutes you can cuddle or chat with her and you'll quickly get hard again.  When I was 22 I'd come for the first time and just stay hard.  Who knows how many times you'll be able to cum in an hour.  Have fun.

This topic does come up from time to time, you are certainly not alone.  I found the following thread which has many good points.  
http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewall.asp?MessageID=88727&boardID=33&page=20

H

I read this and thought about what answer I would give my son at the same age. The real answer is that I seriously doubt he will be a virgin that long. But if he were, I think I would tell him to do what you are contemplating.

When I hear about men bringing their teenage sons/nephews/etc to a provider I cringe. That is such a bad idea.

The best scenario is for your first time to be with someone you have a relationship with, somewhere in the 17 to 20 age range. But that ship has sailed for you. Unless you are religious (and I think that's not the case) a majority of the girls you meet will be more experienced than you, and this only gets more true with every passing year. I don't think you are crazy to think some experience will give you confidence.

Pay for a VIP membership and read the reviews carefully. Pay attention not only to who attracts you but to the content of the reviews. You need to choose someone who is known for her warmth, who allows multiple rounds, who will kiss, who will allow DATY (you need to learn that). I also suggest looking for a low volume provider, not someone who sees 5 guys in 8 hours. Be sure you explain your situation, do not surprise her when you arrive.

P.S. If it embarrasses you, nobody ever has to know the truth about your "first time." If a man I were dating told me that I wouldn't think less of him, but of course I'm not "typical."

Lost my virginity to a provider at age 20, but it was in Saigon and the word "provider" wasn't in the vocabulary yet. I think we just called them bar girls. Nice young lady actually. Don't remember how much it cost or even thinking whether it was worth it. Just seemed like the time was right and wanted to do it at least once before I died.

But don't construe my advice as "go for it" as some others have written. Obviously you aren't in Saigon and your chances of dying tomorrow are not as great as mine were. It's your life not mine and you may or may not regret it.

-- Modified on 11/25/2011 9:13:25 AM

Ha, looks like we are the only two strongly advising him against it.

I am surprised how many people are saying "go for it." But I suppose I shouldn't be. Given the venue, it's like asking a bunch of Christians: "Should I convert to Christianity?" LOL!  

i kick myself almost every day for not finding out about TER and the world of providers until last year...and im fifty-fuckin-four! this is the greatest thing that ever happened to man. you can pick the most beautiful girl you have ever seen and then meet her and she is SOOOO into you, who gives a flying fuck if shes serious or not. for that hour you are in nirvana....you are touching and smelling and licking and fucking women you thought were way out of your league. dude, if you're a virgin...and you have the jack....i would do it in a heartbeat. here are your choices: a girl who is a 6 or 7 who thinks you love her and niether of you know what youre doing.....or  or a 9 or 10 who is not only an expert, but will make you feel like a king throughout. take your pick. and, the best part of all.....in this hobby, you put your clothes back on and walk away.....with the biggest shit eating grin youve ever had.

I would still be a complete virgin, if I hadn't read about this site while deciding which issues of Playboy to keep and which to throw out. There was an article about escorts, hobbiest and how internet had changed the industry in an issue I ended up tossing out. I just wrote down the URL for this site before tossing the issue of Playboy in garbage.

Only you can decide if you'd like to see a escort/provider to say goodbye to your virginity. I have no regrets because I was wanting to have sex and wanted someone who'd guarantee a good first time.

1) It's going to be awkward the first time no matter what.  If you are going the provider route, it would be best to let her know in advance, and to pick a lady older than you that might actually enjoy showing you the ropes.  2) Experience is a learned process.  You won't get anywhere unless you actually get into the game.  3) It clearly bothers you that you still haven't gotten your dick wet at 25, and it should.  

So don't waste anymore time...time for you get laid, son, even if you have to P4P.  Be sure to do your homework if you are going to use TER as your main tool, invest a couple of sawbucks to get VIP if you haven't already, and choose wisely.  DO NOT utilize places such as Back Page until you know what you are doing, even if it looks more attractive from a pricing perspective.

If you were a "typical" 17 or 18 YO guy, I might be more inclined to say "go for it." But instead you are 25, and admit to having issues with being shy and talking to women. Seeing providers can be VERY addictive - not in the sense of a drug, but in the sense that it's so easy.

Some guys, upon entering the world of providers, stop fucking their wives, stop looking for girlfriends, run up their credit cards to dangerous levels, or empty out their retirement accounts. I am concerned that instead of working on your own skills with women, you will find it too easy to continuously fall back on a provider whenever you get horny. And you will find yourself 40 YO, still single, spending your disposable income on providers.

Find yourself some civvie women, fuck them and learn with them. You'll find that many civvies will guide you as to how to please them, so you will "learn on the job" so to speak.

If you don;t have the confidence to approach civvie women, using providers as a crutch will lead you down a path you may not recover from.

if you do this thinking it will make you less shy, or "fix" anything, it will not.  you are paying someone to be nice to you, it will not help you with women in the civie world.

Just wanted to thank everyone for their insight. I really, really appreciate it. Just being able to admit my virginity and the insecurities that come along with it alone was helpful. As for what I'm going to do.. I'm still undecided. I think right now I'm just going to focus on the holidays then make a decision afterward.

If I do decide to go through with it though, I did have a few questions:
1) Many of you have mentioned telling the provider ahead of time that I'm a virgin.. what's the best way to go about doing that? Just tell them right away in my first email (too nervous to call) or at some later time?
2) I've heard people talk about verification sites like RS2k.. Should I just join one of those now or try and book with a provider first? I'm a little uneasy about giving up my real name / personal information but if this is the normal process then I understand. But I heard using verification sites supposedly is "safer"?
3) I have my eye on these two providers in my area and they have a good amount of reviews (I'm guessing that means they're very popular). Do you think I would be ok going with someone like that or should I go with a less popular (less busy) girl? I would prefer those girls mostly because they're the ones I've found to be most attracted to while browsing the available providers in my area. On the flip side, should I just disregard looks / my opinion and just ask the Agency (*Hopefully I'm using the right term there) for who they would recommend for someone in my situation?

Again, thanks again for all your replies and input.