Well, you ARE being paranoid, but it's also good to keep things in the back of your mind. I think in general providers are more interested in monitering their health than others who might be promiscuous in the general populace, so in that regard you should feel safer... Also, HIV contraction is the biggie to worry about, of course, and is also thankfully pretty darn rare in normal penile/vaginal with protection intercourse. I believe the statistics reflect that there is more risk of infection for ER docs/nurses than those in the sex industry. Also, men are much much less likely to contract from a woman than vice versa. RECEIVING BBBJ from a woman is really a non issue. Of course there's an infintessimal chance, but you're more likely to be struck by lightning, I am almost certain. Questions you can ask a provider that would place her in a higher risk group would be if she ever sees clients without protection (I don't know any that do but I've heard of it) and if she does Greek. Greek obviously is more dangerous because of the nature of mechanisms involved. Also ask her if in fact she is tested regularly. More protection available for you should u prefer: dental dams for DATY. I've never had anyone use one with me so I have no experience with them, but I know they are out there. There are 2 STDs that you have to think in the back of your mind that you can contract even WITH condom use: Human Papilloma (sp?) Virus and Herpes (oral or genital). I don't know a number for HPV transmition rates with condoms, but I do know it's the #1 STD in America; it can also be resolved by the body on its own, however in many cases. As far as herpes, of course condoms are going to provide a good degree of protection, and that plus not seeing active lesions on someone should nearly ensure your safety, but there can be asymptomatic shedding of the virus, and there is no guarantee. That said, 25% of the population or more is known to have genital herpes, and 75% of those affected are NOT aware they have the virus.
Basically, the way I look at it... Life is a gamble, whatever you do. The biggest risk we take each day is getting behind the wheel of an automobile. Every time you board a plane, cross a street, etc, you could die. Eating fatty foods increases your risk for heart disease. Smoking and sedentary lifestyles will kill you. Life is risk. You alone can weigh risk and benefit. Personally, my belief is if you can't have some fun, why be alive... I also believe in fate, but I know not everyone does. That said, be protected and good luck deciding what is true to yourself.