I was wondering, what are the rules for when it comes to placing a Hobbyist on the “Black List”? The fuzzy grey areas; not the THREE (3) “R’s” – Robber, Rapist, Retards-no I am not talking about the Special Olympic type – they need love too; I was referring to the A***H***!

Those that are NS/NC – No Show/No Call, CC- chronic canceller, Habitual Line Stepper. Is there a cheat sheet for this?

The Chronic Canceller– never met, had made numerous appointments and either cancels last minute or had given enough notice.
Does the “three (3) strikes and your out” rule apply and then off to the Black List you go? Or does it have to be consecutively as 3 times within a year does not count?

No Show/No Call – (NS/NC) – they have only done this once and never called you to reschedule; would you consider this Black List Worthy- Hey things can happen – e.g. Little Timmy Was Stuck in the Well, The Dog Ate My Homework. These 1st time offenders – you normally do not hear from again anyway- should they be placed on a list?

Pepe Le Pew – yes, please take a brief moment to clean-up/wash before our session. But what about those that even being submerged in a vat of boiling soap and water would not help. Or refuses to do so – yes, yes, those of us that have luxury to say – Thanks but No thank you will do so, but times are hard everyone now; therefore, what use to be a NO Thank You, may be a Sure Come on.  Should the “Hygiene Offender” be placed on a list and if so what category- “I would like He Stinks for 1000 Alex”?

Seriously, I have heard both sides of this argument those that feel that “we” have been to harsh and unfair – side note: I guess they never read the reviews that have been posted about some of these experiences – But that is another day another topic.

What are the rules? Where are the rules? Is it basically up to the individual to decide?  

Both sides please weigh-in please. Really would like to hear each person thoughts – unfiltered!

I do apologize if this topic has been discussed already and blame Suri for any typos – she is Union not suppose to work on weekends!

Assume this is the TER blacklist as opposed to a personal one...

The Chronic Canceller– never met, had made numerous appointments and either cancels last minute or had given enough notice.

> I think this is just a personal don't respond to their e-mails after the 2nd/3rd time unless they agree to do a make-up fee.

No Show/No Call – (NS/NC) – they have only done this once and never called you to reschedule; would you consider this Black List Worthy- Hey things can happen – e.g. Little Timmy Was Stuck in the Well, The Dog Ate My Homework. These 1st time offenders – you normally do not hear from again anyway- should they be placed on a list?

> My pet peeve when the reverse happens but I think this is a definite no blacklist.  As noted, I've had the reverse happen (agency or person sets up an appointment and then goes AWOL).  Some popular well reviewed girls have done this and they have white knights that defend them and you can't really review them for being a flake.   There was a actually a big thread debate on one girl that use to do this and then said goodbye (and has since come back).

Pepe Le Pew – yes, please take a brief moment to clean-up/wash before our session. But what about those that even being submerged in a vat of boiling soap and water would not help. Or refuses to do so – yes, yes, those of us that have luxury to say – Thanks but No thank you will do so, but times are hard everyone now; therefore, what use to be a NO Thank You, may be a Sure Come on.  Should the “Hygiene Offender” be placed on a list and if so what category- “I would like He Stinks for 1000 Alex”?

> Not sure if there is a "he stinks" category but seems like this would qualify for that.  A girl has an issue with this because if she booked the appt, he's taken up time that could have been spent with someone else.  But then again, is there a "he's really ugly" category?  

But like all tools, it is often misused in the wrong hands. It was never intended as an instrument of blackmail, extortion or retribution, but too many providers wield it as such a weapon. Nor should it be used for "nuisance crimes" like NCNS - that's what screening is for. Ironically, the misuse of the blacklist makes us less safe because it reinforces the reluctance to provide screening information.

Even the thought that you might consider  black listing a guy for less than a  very serious or dangerous situation is enough to make me look elsewhere. You've been nixed forever from any consideration by me. Men get black listed for entirely too many things these days that are minor annoyances, and not truly bad deeds. A personal DNS list is fine for these types, but  a black listing is inconceivable. And Alexandra you're now on my DNS list. But I won't black list you.

And the world is a better place knowing that “I”- have been placed on DNS list of Man_Cave – LOL. Thank You, Thank You , Thank You for not banishing me to the World No Return – lol.
What is the point of a “Discussion Board” if we cannot discussion…  

…for harmless reasons like time-wasting. My encounters with them were perfect. So I do not understand the point in essentially outing a man’s information over the net for petty reasons like time-wasting, having bad breath, no call no showing, not leaving the correct donation, etc. That is not very discreet and it is not my duty to warn other women about who they should not see. If I find a man has problematic tendencies, I will put him on my personal DNS list, which I do not share with anyone let alone publicly. The only time another provider even knows I have seen a man is if he chooses to write a review (which rarely happens), tells her over pillow talk or uses me as a reference. Other than that, it is all about discretion and who I see (or do not see because he is on my DNS list) is really no one's business. xo

It seems to me instead of discussing Black Listing men, you need to explain why :

3 out of 4 of your last reviewers said you're not the chick in the pics

Your 3 year old  pics show up all over the world

You haven't had a review in about a year and a half

You have the gall to discuss blacklisting anyone for anything with your track record

I never said I was. I ask what are the Rules? Did you miss that? Really a UPN9 Rundown-- You sound like a Scorned Lover. Stop it... lol.

O, I am sorry, I did not know you were the TER Post Police - so going forward prior to posting, I will send them over to you for approval.

As Rasha said, BLs should be used as a tool to protect providers.  They SHOULD NOT be used as a weapon to threaten or otherwise extort innocent guys.  In the same way, reviews on our end should be informational; they SHOULD NOT be used as leverage to get more out of a session than the provider is willing to give.

I don't think there are hard and fast rules beyond that, and if you're looking for that, you won't get them.  Every situation is unique and different, and remember that when you out a client, you are putting his entire information for all the provider world to see.  Consider that there are some crazy people out there, and that they will take this information and use it for bad things.  By putting someone on a BL, you open the door for this.

Ask yourself this question:  Would you be comfortable if your PERSONAL INFO were out there for all to see, just because of a session that went wrong?  If so, then go right ahead.  But if you were to really apply this standard, I think you might think twice.

Does it have to black and white?  You can always qualify things without throwing the hammer down.  Here are a few examples given what you used below.

NS/NC/CC:  Seems easy enough.  Disclose his handle, email address and phone number.  Don't disclose his real name.  Doesn't seem to be enough to ruin him...it's more of a "heads-up" in my book.

Habitual line stepper:  You need to clarify this.  Did he try to stick it in without a condom?  You need to be specific here.  If he did something to really jeopardize you, like stick it in without a condom, then you need to say something, because that is obviously VERY dangerous.

Pepe Le Pew:  I would apply the NS/NC/CC guidelines.

Rasha's response also is very well articulated and to the point.

I apply the same rules for less-than-stellar provider experiences.  I don't feel a need to write a scathing review, or share it publicly.

Discretion is key.

Which is ironic, I guess, because I am a pretty active poster on the boards these days, but I do draw the line at disclosing anything that I would not be comfortable writing in a public review.

Seems to me that a discussion of anything on the boards is fair game.

I certainly don't look at the handles of other clients/hobbyists when discussing stuff.  I just answer the question and try to contribute.

If she is B&S, that's fine.  But isn't that a separate issue?

Comprehension- really, really, and really. Where are you pulling this from? I never said anything about my photos/ nor did I mention any names when I posted. I just asked the question. I think you made it clear that – I SHOULD NOT ASK THESE OR THIS TYPE OF QUESTION(S). And that I should have known my place and not respond to your post.  And I made it clear – I will and can – So you can watch me walk.

I am sure Dr. Phil has room from you on his stage. Wait for it, wait for it, wait for it - keep validating me. huff and puff and blow try to blow my house down.... I am number 5 on your Google Search Engine - Pure Enjoyment. Wait, I am role-playing - I am the naughty naughty Post Lady and you Strong Post Police - Sergrant Cave- This  is extra you know.. lol.

You DO NOT have to out a hobbyist's personal information, nor do you have to post that information on sites that are publicly accessible and searchable by Google. We do have private sites and can be discriminate about what info we make available to others.

Also, a hobbyist can be a 'problem client' without being dangerous. For example, those hobbyists who demand discounts or inordinate favors (BBFS, free dates) in exchange for high reviews, who exhibit stalkerish behavior, who repeatedly ask for offensive/harmful/unpleasant things in session and can't take a "NO", who purposely short pay - in my opinion, other girls deserve a warning about those clients. Not all of that comes forward in screening, especially if the client is careful to maintain good etiquette leading up to the appointment. However, I personally would only out 'hobby' information in this case and would be very careful to ensure that no identifying info is ever leaked. And, also that it is posted in an area where ONLY providers can see it.

And that means that it's something that can be copied, PDF'd (easy to do on a Mac), and then distributed.

I think posting anyone's personal information is a very bad idea.  There are lots of loose cannons in the world.  Guys and girls have a lot to lose when this stuff goes public, and you just have to be very careful about respecting that.

As I said, in a non-dangerous situation, I would refrain from posting any information that could potentially identify someone. For example, I'd post: "Mike", "BigMAN" on TER, "[email protected]", something like that. If the email was one the client used for work or personal life (there are ways to find that out) I would not post the email addy. But that is just me personally, I know plenty who will out everything, work info and all, for a NCNS.

Hope they know that karma is a bitch.

And that does not automatically make one indiscreet, but the types of things one posts can do so. Well my three day posting binge has been entertaining, but hopefully I can make it a month with a bit of silence off of the boards. Take care. xoxo

I agree, this is a great approach to take.
I have found that MANY providers simply place gentlemen on public blacklists for no reason, and often there completely fabricated reasons why they chose to place the man on there.

"Not getting along with someone" is not a reason to place their name, phone number, email addresses and other personal information on a public blacklist.

This is a business that requires absolute discretion - and if you feel need to "blast" someone's personal information all over the internet if they happen to miss an appointment or short you by $20 well then perhaps it is not the right business for you.

I was blacklisted by a provided who did it bc I left an anonymous review (which was positive)... since she couldn't make me tell her who I was, she threw a hissy-fit and like a child decided to blacklist me LOL...  

I never mentioned any name, I have no names, just wanted a discussion so both sides to share their view points. Perhaps learn things we did not see or know before.

The sad part is, I do never met, spoke to, or know “IT” above. Now I have a Groupie. He has Google me more than a Kardashian - Sigh.  – No Fighting-

Maybe "It" view this as role-play. I am going to send an invoice then.

My beloved client(s) and friend(s) know me. It’s ok. I thank everyone for their support openly and privately. I really do - xoxox.  (eom)

I have an awesome regular who in the beginning booked a few times(more then three) and then as the date got closer canceled. Yes I was peeved and annoyed but I really didn't know what was going on in his life. He has a pretty busy job and a family and well I was his mini vacation. Point is he was trying his best to see me but life got in the way.

I personally think that many providers are too trigger happy with the Blacklisting. I think an individual should get blacklisted if he rapes a provider, beats, robs or  stalks a provider. He should get blacklisted if he doesn't follow her rules as far as safe practices are involved, for example wearing condoms and he pulls it off and tries to slip it in.

 I DO NOT think a client should be blacklisted if he is late, or if he cancels an appointment. Even if he has booked with you once, twice, three times and cancels, it doesn't warrant a Blacklist.  If a provider thinks that the client is unreliable then just cease communication with him, move on. Or tread carefully, and don't count on him to get a room.

 XoXo, Sidney

One of the problems here is that no one really knows if they have been blacklisted.  One might be listed somewhere with personal info and never know it until....

At times, during verification,  I've gotten the impression that there might be neg. info on me somewhere, but there is no way to tell.  Girls. imagine if you were blocked out of reading your reviews, or imagine if we had your personal information and could post it anonymously at our whim, without you ever being privy.  As more and more providers ask for more and more personal information, one must ask themselves who really needs to be protected?