: New England Discussion : Sent you a PM

Sophia6969 See my TER Reviews 1071 reads

posted 12 years ago

1 / 20

So, about a month ago I met a new client. This person teaches a sex education course at a local school (I wouldn't mention that, however it has been brought to my attention that he detailed our encounter and spoke about me BY NAME in his class.). The encounter had left me with a sour taste in my mouth for several reasons. A few of those reasons being; he was an incredible egomaniac, insisting on attempting to give me over 10 orgasms LOL, going on an on about how he teaches people how to have great sex while meanwhile he really wasn't that fantastic, secondly at the end of our date he said "well, if you aren't lying to me, and your orgasms were real, then how about you see me for free this weekend?". Flustered, I agreed, just to avoid conflict while he was still in my room, but not having any intention of following through, as that in my opinion would be highly inappropriate.

I couldn't even fathom how this individual who insisted they see the highest end providers and were something of an expert in this world, would not have the basic understanding that it is my job as a provider to make my clients feel like they are a king in the bedroom, and to take that as an indicator of anything more is silly.

Anyways, a few weeks pass with me ignoring his emails, and I suddenly hear from a regular client of mine who tells me he has been bragging about me in his class, saying he has read over 20 reviews where people say I couldn't orgasm (I have only been in this buisness a few months, and there is no way more than 5 reviews exist in regards to me, and NONE of them say that). I was immediately upset hearing this, but brushed it off as a damaged ego from me ignoring his messages. I think I recieved one more letter from him asking for an explanation of why I wouldn't see him again, I also ignored this. In my experience clients who want a relationship beyond our professional ones, are best left alone.

Today, in response to a "hey, I am in town an available" message I sent out to regulars, I received this email...

"I would but my teacher has instructed all of us and his Twitter followers to say no to meeting you. I guess you pissed him off. There are 800 of us on Twitter in Springfield/Hartford area.

Sorry maybe you could apologize to him."

I am so incredibly appalled and shocked, and honestly have no idea how to handle this. Perhaps some of you have thoughts as to what the next best step would be?

Any advice is very very much appreciated : /. I am very hurt that someone would attempt to damage my clientele and livelihood in this manner, simply because I did not choose to see them for a repeat visit.

Thanks,
Sophia XOXO

CTGuy12000 2 Reviews 484 reads

posted 12 years ago

2 / 20

He's an ego centric jerk

Sounds like a total jerk that should be avoided.

mrfisher 115 Reviews 437 reads

posted 12 years ago

3 / 20

For starters he should be blacklisted for revealing information about you....

Next, I would send along to TER management a copy of that Twitter and anything else that he might have sent revealing what an ass he is, and ask him to be banned from TER.

I have trouble understanding how any teacher of school aged kids could get away with revealing that he sees providers, and not get fired from his job, but who knows. Is this a college level course perhaps?

In any case, continue radio silence. Don't even open or read anything from him

MaxyNiceGuy 18 Reviews 459 reads

posted 12 years ago

4 / 20

Re: He's an ego centric jerk

It ceases to amaze me when I talk with and hear the stories from you poor women! You not only have to provide continuous top notch service with a smile, but you also need a degree in the mental health field to deal with all the bullshit you gotta wade through. No wonder many working girls end up hating guys...LOL

First off the guys who think they are gods gift and can make a woman have the big "O" and for that matter Multiple "O's" need a major reality check, I read so many reviews here where the guys brag about how they made there date orgasm wildly or multiple times....GUYS, hate to burst your bubble, but most of the time its a Emmy award winning act all for your pleasure...enjoy it for what its worth, making you feel like a man!

AS far as this Psycho ....I don't know any way you can lawfully convince him to go away and STFU! It sucks that he has tarnished your good name, but unless there are only 800 guys in your area all of whom are sitting on twitter awaiting this douchbags next word I wouldn't worry too much about it! Just keep doing what you do, give great service, get good reviews and eventually this will all go away. I know your upset at this and probably want to have this assholes legs broken right about now, but that won't solve the problem..maybe it will as it will make you feel a bit better!!! LOL

You sound like a nice person, dont let this tarnish what you do or how you approach this business! Its terrible you had to go through this but most certainly your going to meet up with other assholes in the future, just dont take it personal...Walk away with your head held high with the knowledge you done the best you can do.

Good Luck and hope this asshole decides to lay off!
Muffy

cwillzx 15 Reviews 471 reads

posted 12 years ago

5 / 20

On the other side of the coin...

It may not go along with general consensus, I believe addressing the issue once via email may diffuse the situation.
Yes, this guy is a total ass hat, and should be called out here for using your name and disrespecting you to his twitter followers. (and sudents??? WTF?)

However, that being said, nothing probably feels worse than not knowing, or being completely ignored. It tends to fuel peoples rage if they feel they are being dismissed as not worthy of response. (Especially in the case of a nutter like this guy appears to be, all ego and no mojo)

A simple response, stating that upon further consideration you decided you were not comfortable seeing him as a client or otherwise, may be an option. Respectfully request he not make any further reference to you in public, and that you wish him the best but he should not contact you again except to say he received and understood your message.

Don't threaten to out him or anything like that, it only brings you to his petty level and will enrage him even more. Don't fuel the fire, attempt to douse it with a civil reply to his actions. One reply only.

It's just my opinion. I hope you find a way to resolve the issue.

cwillzx 15 Reviews 81 reads

posted 12 years ago

6 / 20

OK, This opens up an entirely new can of worms for him

That's against the law, pure and simple. It falls under the Massachuseets wiretapping statute.
https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartIV/TitleI/Chapter272/Section99 (sub-section C)
$10,000 and five years in jail.

If he continues this behavior, talk to a lawyer. You may have committed a misdemeanor, but that's a felony.

Posted By: Sophia6969

It is a college level course at a good university in W Mass. This is the newest email from the client who informed me of this happening..

"I have seen these emails he wrote. I have also heard the recording of you stating you have never had that many orgasms with a man before. He had recorded part of your meeting and I will say it sounded like you were having a good time. He shared part of the recording and some emails with a group of us men one night.

cwillzx 15 Reviews 56 reads

posted 12 years ago

7 / 20

OK, This opens up an entirely new can of worms for him

That's against the law, pure and simple. It falls under the Massachuseets wiretapping statute.
https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartIV/TitleI/Chapter272/Section99 (sub-section C)
$10,000 and five years in jail.

If he continues this behavior, talk to a lawyer. You may have committed a misdemeanor, but that's a felony.

Posted By: Sophia6969

It is a college level course at a good university in W Mass. This is the newest email from the client who informed me of this happening..

"I have seen these emails he wrote. I have also heard the recording of you stating you have never had that many orgasms with a man before. He had recorded part of your meeting and I will say it sounded like you were having a good time. He shared part of the recording and some emails with a group of us men one night.

cwillzx 15 Reviews 413 reads

posted 12 years ago

8 / 20

I think one of your replies got deleted...

Probably because you dropped a name.
But in response to him recording you, and playing it for others:
That's against the law, pure and simple. It falls under the Massachuseets wiretapping statute.
https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartIV/TitleI/Chapter272/Section99 (sub-section C)
$10,000 and five years in jail.

If he continues this behavior, talk to a lawyer. You may have committed a misdemeanor, but that's a felony.

Posted By: Sophia6969

It is a college level course at a good university in W Mass. This is the newest email from the client who informed me of this happening..

"I have seen these emails he wrote. I have also heard the recording of you stating you have never had that many orgasms with a man before. He had recorded part of your meeting and I will say it sounded like you were having a good time. He shared part of the recording and some emails with a group of us men one night.

cwillzx 15 Reviews 399 reads

posted 12 years ago

9 / 20

Sent you a PM

Regarding him recording you.

EWCQ3T68 36 Reviews 345 reads

posted 12 years ago

10 / 20

Terrible Behavior, Shocked

It's incredible what you girls have to deal with on a daily basis. Truly sorry to hear that.

The advice from muffythediver and cwillzx are spot on. Two sides of the coin. The first approach, which you've tried, hasn't worked so I would use the advice from cwillzx. Keep your response short, in a kind tone and to the point. From there I would just move back on with your livelihood. If someone does not want to see you because of an opinion of another then I wouldn't bother seeing them and would simply exclude them from future email distributions. There are too many good, sane guys out there that will want to see you and hopefully not cause you this type of headache in the future.

Sophia6969 See my TER Reviews 445 reads

posted 12 years ago

11 / 20

Re: He's an ego centric jerk

Thank you very much for your kind words. One of the reasons I am most shaken up is that I am a graduate student in the same state, and plan to continue my actual career in the field of academics. I also have family that interact and work at the same university he teaches at, so my fear is this coming back and forcing my two worlds to collide. I am hesitant to take any legal approach due to the fact that he could get me in trouble with the recording. Is there any sort of site I can post on to warn other girls about this guy, so they don't go through what I have? That is probably one of my biggest concerns. I have a pretty solid base of regulars who would never listen to someone like this, and know that I provide high quality services, so luckily other than the one person I spoke with today, I don't see this impacting my life too seriously. I sent him a polite email saying that I would give him the benifit of the doubt in satisfying my request to delete any form of recordings he has of me, and to please cease any sort of public discussion regarding our encounter. Hopefully this will put this all to rest, but I have my doubts : /. It is really really nice and reassuring to read all the supportive comments here, so thank you for giving me a little restorative faith in the buisness! I hope everyone is having a sexy lovely warm evening! XOXO Sophia

EWCQ3T68 36 Reviews 388 reads

posted 12 years ago

12 / 20

Re: He's an ego centric jerk

If he's teaching at a university I find it very hard to believe that the university administration would condone his extracurricular activity if it were found out. I would gather he has much more to lose than you do if that ever became public. Just as you don't want your two worlds to collide he doesn't want his two worlds to collide either.

TrulyMsMocha See my TER Reviews 313 reads

posted 12 years ago

13 / 20

What a pussy ... for someone who thinks so much of himself he has a very fragile ego -e-

END OF MESSAGE

TrulyMsMocha See my TER Reviews 387 reads

posted 12 years ago

14 / 20

No absolutely not he deserves no response. Any attention will fuel it even more -e-

END OF MESSAGE

sweetnicole1 See my TER Reviews 377 reads

posted 12 years ago

15 / 20

anyone who hops on that crazy bandwagon are ppl you really dont want to see anyway!

They are not free thinkers they seem to miss the point that this *teacher* has serious issues.
they did not see for themselves read your reviews or contact any of your reviewers personally.
so why worry yourself over a client and his followers
you were wise to see the signs now don't let one losers BS wreck your day

-- Modified on 1/14/2014 10:44:56 AM

ginainthemorning See my TER Reviews 344 reads

posted 12 years ago

16 / 20

badboy

Wow this guy really likes playing bad boy. If I were a student in his class, I would find him telling these stories offensive and academically inappropriate. I wonder who the SCHOOL would feel to find out about his behavior. I also feel bad for you that you had to work so hard with him to begin with, as not too many providers would have spend the time faking 10 orgasims, and you treated him like a King, and now he feels ENTITLED. He sure looks small now, in the eyes of the world.

Posted By: Sophia6969

So, about a month ago I met a new client. This person teaches a sex education course at a local school (I wouldn't mention that, however it has been brought to my attention that he detailed our encounter and spoke about me BY NAME in his class.). The encounter had left me with a sour taste in my mouth for several reasons. A few of those reasons being; he was an incredible egomaniac, insisting on attempting to give me over 10 orgasms LOL, going on an on about how he teaches people how to have great sex while meanwhile he really wasn't that fantastic, secondly at the end of our date he said "well, if you aren't lying to me, and your orgasms were real, then how about you see me for free this weekend?". Flustered, I agreed, just to avoid conflict while he was still in my room, but not having any intention of following through, as that in my opinion would be highly inappropriate.

I couldn't even fathom how this individual who insisted they see the highest end providers and were something of an expert in this world, would not have the basic understanding that it is my job as a provider to make my clients feel like they are a king in the bedroom, and to take that as an indicator of anything more is silly.

Anyways, a few weeks pass with me ignoring his emails, and I suddenly hear from a regular client of mine who tells me he has been bragging about me in his class, saying he has read over 20 reviews where people say I couldn't orgasm (I have only been in this buisness a few months, and there is no way more than 5 reviews exist in regards to me, and NONE of them say that). I was immediately upset hearing this, but brushed it off as a damaged ego from me ignoring his messages. I think I recieved one more letter from him asking for an explanation of why I wouldn't see him again, I also ignored this. In my experience clients who want a relationship beyond our professional ones, are best left alone.

Today, in response to a "hey, I am in town an available" message I sent out to regulars, I received this email...

"I would but my teacher has instructed all of us and his Twitter followers to say no to meeting you. I guess you pissed him off. There are 800 of us on Twitter in Springfield/Hartford area.

Sorry maybe you could apologize to him."

I am so incredibly appalled and shocked, and honestly have no idea how to handle this. Perhaps some of you have thoughts as to what the next best step would be?

Any advice is very very much appreciated : /. I am very hurt that someone would attempt to damage my clientele and livelihood in this manner, simply because I did not choose to see them for a repeat visit.

Thanks,
Sophia XOXO

weipeikei See my TER Reviews 313 reads

posted 12 years ago

17 / 20

Assuming he has zero personal information about you..

I would consider him simply a nuisance at best, and a fucking douchebag at worst.

Since I'm sure you've already blacklisted him, I would stop responding to him/contacting him/anything. Out of sight, out of mind.

-- Modified on 1/16/2014 1:13:40 AM

harborview 10 Reviews 328 reads

posted 12 years ago

18 / 20

So many rules broken...

#1 This is a secret world & anyone who doesn't get that is dangerous. Loose lips sink ships & his blabbing is not cool! Often our little hobby is tolerated as long as it is discreet.

#2 That recording didn't just happen. It was already in play from the start of the session. He PLANNED to record it... without your permission. That's just wrong.

#3 THEN he publically disclosed it.

#4 Oh, yeah, I view the Twitter message as a blackmail attempt.

If ever there was a person who needs to be Black Listed, this moron is it.

yvannaindemand See my TER Reviews 371 reads

posted 12 years ago

19 / 20

He gets an F-

for being indiscreet and not very gentlemanly. Even if he is having a total break from reality, chances are, he would not pull this nonsense with a non provider---So , inexcusable.
Would you please ad this person to nationalblacklist dot com , so that other ladies might avoid dealing with this nightmare.
If you do decide to contact this person, for instance to send a cease and desist, have it sent with a attorney's letter head and signature. Do not contact him or reply yourself, no matter what.

-- Modified on 1/17/2014 9:34:03 AM

powderpuff 367 reads

posted 12 years ago

20 / 20

MAD

For most in the hobby the cold war principle of Mutually Assured Destruction is enough incentive to keep your mouth shut about any encounter.
Does this guy get a free pass on ethics to visit escorts? In the eyes of his employer, is visiting an escort "research?"
Is breaking the law OK?
I think the twitter response you received was from him.

I can not understand how a teacher, at any level, initiating a discussion in class about his personal recent experience with an escort doesn't end in his being fired.