So I take 1/2 a day off today to enjoy the weather and, of course, some hobby fun.  I scheduled an appt with a provider who is fairly well reviewed.  (I am a massage guy, so this is re: a body rubs lady.)  For the sake of this post, let's just say this provider does (and allows) "A, B, C, and D" according to nearly all her reviews.  Scheduling was easy with a few texts, so we did have open communications.  A bit into the massage, the top comes off.  Nice.  But about 20 minutes into the session, she let's me know that it is her time of the month, so panties would stay on and no playing down there.  WTF?!?!?  Really???  Needless to say, that pretty much deflated everything.  I was really looking forward to "C & D."  ("A & B" can be had many places and for much less.)  I am very unhappy, to say the least, because I could have used that bundle of money to see another provider.  I feel deceived and cheated- especially since this provider has been around for a while and has the reviews.  That almost makes it worse IMHO.  

I have run into that situation and all three times I was advised ahead of time and given the option to cancel.  I went ahead with all three but was done with the understanding of what the limitations were going in so no problem.  Me being a breastaholic, this is kinda ok as some women's breasts are more "interactive" during the monthly 'special time'.  I used my gentle oral approach to them and things really went quite well, for both of us!  
I did very much appreciate the advance notice, however.  I'd think that would be appropriate.

Even if it showed up at the last minute.  I've had a provider call me when I was on the way over to tell me it just hit.

...as I wrote, this is a well-reviewed provider.  I think she has 6 pages (maybe more) of positive reviews, which is what disappoints me even more.  I like the foreplay both ways.  I would expect a provider would either not work or would alert a client to such a situation.  And I certainly will NOT schedule with her again.  Thanks for your comments!

Sounds like you just write an honest review on this well reviewed lady and go on with life and remember this hobby has its share of disappoints.

...and I don't blame them for not doing so.

Her timing could have been much much MUCH better - BEFORE you arrive of course! If it started during the date it might be a different story. I would say your expectations are reasonable and maybe a follow up email to address your concerns would be appropriate if you plan to see her again.

Why do you not blame them?  Why should they not answer the question and take a position? Are you giving them cover?  They should answer and let us know where they stand on the matter.  Every woman (well, almost) goes through this every month, so it's not like this is an unusual occurrence.  Are you suggesting we just sweep it under the rug and just pretend it's not an issue?  As far as I am concerned, I paid $200 and got 1/2 a service. As a customer, I am not happy. If this were a product I purchased at a store, I'd return it immediately as defective. If providers are truly concerned with their reputation, I think they should chime in.

I really appreciate it.  It was obvious the event didn't start during the session.  Nice to read a provider's perspective that agrees with me and others that she should have told me BEFORE the session.  Heck, she could have told me while we were sending texts back and forth.  I won't be sending her an email, and I certainly WILL NOT see her again.  Thanks again for your reply.

You're not exactly entitled all access to a woman's body to do whatever you want to her just because you're paying either.
Would you be saying the same things you are now if she weren't having shark week & told you no ?
Not trying to be mean just something to consider ....

YOUR issue is with ONE provider, the woman you paid.  The other women who may occasionally post on this board have NO responsibility to answer your questions here.  NONE!  You want to hold the entire MN provider community accountable and call every woman out because you had an issue with one independent woman? WTF is THAT called?  Oh yeah I know, it's called being an asshat.  

It's her body to say who has access to what and guys should never EXPECT the ladies usually  fuller menu. Whether it was her time of month or the guy is stanky and dirty and breath of a rhino, she has a right to say no.  Should the guy expect a lower donation for that.......maybe.    Not only that, if he was a new client to this lady, well if she says in writing either text or email that her lower half is off limits, well, isn't that evidence to illegal acts?   I think if she is someone he has seen before, she should have told him that C & D were off limits.  

Had she told him no with not reason he and his wallet could have found someone else the haves good time with.  
Had she told him of the issue they could have rescheduled.
Now he and others Will have her on a DNC list.
I agree that it is her body, but there are also in most cases with experienced clients fairly accurate expectations of what will happen BCD. when it does not nobody wins

Feel good now, Little Johnny?  Beat your chest now that you have come to rescue the damsel in distress? You are such a wonderful purple-headed gladiator of love. How nice of you to take this and turn it into something it's not just to make yourself look like a hero. Well done.  Bravo. So proud of you.  But I didn't know YOU are the boss of this board and leader of the hobby community.  

To answer your last question first: No.  If a woman says no, that is it. Period. (No pun intended.)  But if a woman advertises nude, B2B massages and exchanges, it is pretty implicit that she will be touched, right? If not, then she should change her advertising.  And I never wrote anything about doing whatever I wanted to any woman.  But if a woman is going to do a nude massage, then the panties should be off, right?  Do you not think a provider should tell a client that it is her time of the month when such activities are to be partaken?  At some point, I think it would be a common courtesy.  Especially for a provider who is well reviewed.  I would expect this from one of the young spinners who come and go every month, but not a seasoned lady.  That's all.

The number one point being brought up is Honesty. That's all he wanted so he could decide for himself whether to continue. Yes it's her body to do as she wishes. But at same time it's his cash to do as He wishes that's being overlooked.  In the end she still walked away with his donation in hand and probably won't look back. She certainly could reach out to him if she is on here, it goes both ways right. My suggestion try saying you feel under the weather next time you see someone and want a discount . See how far that goes.

I agree with you that it is ALWAYS a woman's (or man's) right to say no or not allow anything to be done to them they don't want done.  That is NOT an issue for me at all. But as far as access goes, if a woman advertises B2B, nude, and exchange, then it is pretty implicit that mutual touching will occur.  If the woman doesn't want to conduct a session in that manner after advertising it and after seeing the client at the door, then she should simply tell him that she prefers not to see him rather than start a session and deliver only a portion of the goods.  Don't you think that is fair?  Regarding texts, new client, and legality.  A simple text stating, "It's my time of the month.  Do you still want to come? Or should we re-schedule"  would take care of any issues.  (Or so I think.)

I am not a "Massage/Body Rub girl " I am a full service GFE provider. So I don't know if the rules or passes are any different with massage girls or not. But us ladies generally know when it's going to be our time of the month. She, A. should not have scheduled massages during her time of the month. Or B, she should have just used a diaphragm or Cervical Cap type protection and proceeded with her session. or C, she should have refunded a portion of the rate. Just my opinion.
 

Your reply is EXACTLY what I hoped to elicit from providers.  Not necessarily that we are in agreement, but that you provided a thoughtful response and some options.  I truly just wanted to hear from providers to get their perspective.  I have my own views, as does everyone else, and I wanted to learn if I was way out of the norm for thinking what I did.  Thanks again.  I really appreciate it!  (And I think the rules would apply to providers across the board.)

Idk I didn't see hardly anyone complaining about DIY when that became a thing and fellas were throwing out 8's & 9's for performance scores like no tomorrow and those girls never said anything up front in ads and e-mails for the most part hahaha !

Like all really complicated questions the reason the answer is difficult is because at some level both sides are correct.

Way different for massage providers here.
It's always YMMV with the vast majority of us and if you don't get that then don't see massage only providers see FS ladies instead...

Ok tough guy, let's take another look at YOUR words.....  

It is a simple and straight forward proposition. I will not make a fuss about it, but it is an expensive lesson. Lesson learned. There are plenty of reviewed ladies that offer far more for the same rate, but that's a personal preference. The provider should have said something to you about her situation, especially since it was your first encounter, and asked you if you were okay before proceeding with the session.

Couldn't have said it better myself.  "it's always straight"

I couldn't agree with you more.  And she is a well-reviewed provider.  That's why I was so surprised.

When you are charging top dollar and have pages of reviews, it is pretty well understood what the session will involve.

I don't think TER rules allow 8 or 9 for DIY.  I don't recall the exact rules, but I think much more needs to take place than DIY for an 8 or 9.  Feel free correct me if I am wrong.  I am not a DIY guy, but I reviewed a body rub gal once and gave her a high rating, but TER wouldn't allow the high score because certain things didn't occur.  And to your comment about them not advertising DIY: No, they didn't advertise that.  BUT, their reviews ALL stated they were DIY, so guys knew that going in.

All I can offer is what TER replied to me, and what TER has posted on its website for rating providers. If there were 8s and 9s for DIY, then they were clearly not written within TER guidelines. So while you jump on the bandwagon to slam me, can you corroborate your statement by showing me some DIYs who got 8s and 9s?  

I did some research because I like to deal with facts.  I looked at reviews for some of the gals known to do/did DIY, and I saw some 8s - 4 years ago.  So I will stand corrected (as I asked to be).  But at the same time, TER will not allow 8s or 9s in today's world for DIY.  I know not only because of their rules, which I copied and pasted in another post, but because one of my reviews for a non-DIY sessoin was "Unapproved" for its high score because the provider did not perform any of the required acts.

Do your homework.

Read #7 on TER's rules for submitting.

so I can see your point 20/20.

Just below the yellow envelope?  Since when did this world have rules?  Especially your rules?  To answer the gist behind your OP, and quite frankly, maybe she just wasn't into you?  Or maybe you had bad timing.  Either way that won't be the worst experience in your hobby life if you stick around any length of time.  Enjoy!

Totally agree...  As is so often the case, issues on this board seem to be easily polarized into the really hard yes/no, black and white absolutes.  Nothing about getting totally naked with a near-stranger and having the kind of intimacy the hobby provides is ever going to be that absolute.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UH01FhqMdc8

You've also been quick to threaten others whose opinion you disagree with Johnny.

Monieb,
I think that is all the OP was looking for - advance warning so he could make his decision based on that just as you did. That way he wouldn't have unreasonable expectations, due to her being unable to perform at 100% of normal.

Posted By: monieb

I have run into that situation and all three times I was advised ahead of time and given the option to cancel.  I went ahead with all three but was done with the understanding of what the limitations were going in so no problem.  Me being a breastaholic, this is kinda ok as some women's breasts are more "interactive" during the monthly 'special time'.  I used my gentle oral approach to them and things really went quite well, for both of us!    
 I did very much appreciate the advance notice, however.  I'd think that would be appropriate.

It really is that easy to compromise or make a "negative" into a win-win situation by offering as you suggested.

Yep. I see that. But guess what?  I have many, many more than 37. Good grief. Another braggard. Do wear your badge of honor 24/7?  Where did I try to insert any rules? Just asked questions. Been around this hobby longer than you realize.   To answer your question, which really was a statement  not a question, she was into me and the whole session.  If not, I doubt she would have went down on me.  Wait until the review is posted. But nice try to assert yourself as a bigger white knight than little purple headed gladiator of love. You guys related? Napoleon one your ancestors?

Sorry honey, I have to inform you that it's actually not black & white like that.
Like I've said, which bears repeating just so you & maybe some others get it.
Again,
Many reviewers here find themselves having to embelish massage ladies reviews in order to get them posted.
 Because more often than not they get deferred for whatever reason well, unless you're a classic misogynist who constantly insults every provider you visit with low scores and digs at her looks or whatever makes your cock feel bigger than your brethren but that's a whole other thread....Aside from that,
 massage ladies are always YMMV . No more, No less.
 

I'm surprised TER's servers haven't crashed under the weight of the pettiness of this thread. Pettiness from all directions. The world in which we play is laced with uncertainty. You just never know what you're going to get on a first visit until you go. I've found that I usually get what I expect based on the reviews. Usually, but not always. There have been times when I've gotten the "not on the first date" line. And I've often suspected that perhaps it was a time of month issue. But our world is not BestBuy where the sales associate "should" have told you that your printer cartridge would only last two weeks. There's no implied contract here. My approach has always been that everything is YMMV on the first date. And if I can't figure out a way to have a nice time with a beautiful girl who isn't giving me everything I expected then perhaps I should take up a new habit. Knitting or crosstitching or vintage parking meter collecting. What really slays me is the vitriol with which people on all sides are reacting. I don't feel a need to have the last word on this, but I truly hope the last word happens soon... before the servers crash.

95% of massage girls use schedulers and the scheduler schedules them to work no matter what. I was told by providers that they pretty much have to go in no matter what if someone schedules. That or she did not like you so she made an excuse. If she cancels an appt that is already scheduled then she loses the money and still has to pay the scheduler so just bad timing on your part.

Amen.

"Insults, personal attacks, name calling or intimidation have no place in civil discussions and are not welcome on TER. Ever."

after the bare ball slapping you unleashed on me.  Ouch!  One factual correction needed on your part...the adjective you used to describe me..."braggard" the spelling of the correct word goes as such..."d-r-u-n-k-a-r-d"

"It" will likely not go away but you'll be a whole lot happier sweetie.

1 you were informed ahead of time.
2 you were offered my lower rate TWICE.
3 EVERYONE KNOWS that I do that just in case because I'm NOT an asshole.
Nice LIE THOUGH!
You weren't ripped off at all so take you little story and kiss my ass

" So I take 1/2 a day off today to enjoy the weather and, of course, some hobby fun.  I scheduled an appt with a provider who is fairly well reviewed.  (I am a massage guy, so this is re: a body rubs lady." Posted March 29