Brabantio,
Never give up! Take a break from hobbying, and sock away the money for when you return. And yes, I have had a few amazing experiences like you've described, over the 15 years or so that I've been hobbying. I've often found that the most interesting connections I've had to providers have arrived in non-sexual ways. For example, an actress whose stage performances I could go and enjoy before ravishing her sexually the following week. I still get a shiver just thinking of her 10 years later. I never thought I could top that experience, but in a way I never want to. Since that time, I've had some new and wonderful provider experiences that have also made indelible impressions in my mind. More recently I saw a massage provider UTR for 5 years, seeing her progress from only allowing DIY to going to FS. That was a really fun progression, and I think we both genuinely enjoyed the process. I never had the guts to ask if she did the same for other clients, but it didn't matter. She made me feel like it was something special she shared with me. She's left the industry, and I'm happy for her. I have socked away that fun memory too, while I continue to explore the many wonderful ladies we have in the Twin Cities. While I do genuinely miss these two ATF's I've mentioned, I'm always on the hunt for the next great life experienceHere's a situation I'm sure other people on this board have encountered before.
I had a body-2-body massage provider last year who sadly retired and disappeared off the scene just over a year ago. Her service always blew my socks off, but no matter I thought, there are plenty of others to try, and maybe it's a good thing that I might sample a wider variety.
I've now tried about a dozen who provide, at least descriptively, the same service but none of them seem to click with me in the same way that this one did. Granted, I did find her an almost perfect match for me in terms of looks and personality so it was a little easier to act out the fantasy and then walk away from it until our next appointment.
So I'm at a point where I'm thinking maybe it's me and I'm done with this scene and it's time for me to stop trying. Or... maybe, just maybe, there's still that one massage provider out there who will rattle my senses the same way.
I don't review any more because while the ladies I've seen after my ATF retired are probably very good (and their reviews seem to suggest this), I'm looking to replace someone and that can't be done, so any reviews would be too comparative and not subjective, which would be unfair.
So... guys and girls... time to give up? What think you?
1) Get over it and quit.
2) Stalk her until you are arrested. Rumor has it, she quit because of an obsessive/stalking client.
3) Keep looking for the same experience with others.
I would like to have seen her before she disappeared, but I did not. She was striking with a you-have-no-idea-what-I-will-do-to-you look. If she was as great as you reviewed, then you were very fortunate to have had it for as long as you did. We have all been there, as you stated, and getting back in the saddle again is sometimes hard.
One option I have used: Go see the raunchiest, nastiest provider you can. (I do not mean gross, I mean PSE-like) It might snap you out of your puppy dog pity party and provide a different perspective.
There is celibacy....
2) Stalk her until you are arrested. Rumor has it, she quit because of an obsessive/stalking client.
3) Keep looking for the same experience with others.
I would like to have seen her before she disappeared, but I did not. She was striking with a you-have-no-idea-what-I-will-do-to-you look. If she was as great as you reviewed, then you were very fortunate to have had it for as long as you did. We have all been there, as you stated, and getting back in the saddle again is sometimes hard.
One option I have used: Go see the raunchiest, nastiest provider you can. (I do not mean gross, I mean PSE-like) It might snap you out of your puppy dog pity party and provide a different perspective.
There is celibacy....
I can understand your frustration, I once had a young lady, who I had an exclusive arrangement with. All UTR of course.
This Babe was all that and then some! the stories that I could share. LOL
We had so much FUN! That went on for just shy of 3 years, and then she announced to me, that she wanted more.
At the time of the announcement, she let me know, that she was interested in me, as a BF, and was talking about co habituating, I declined the very flattering offer, and attempted to work out some other kind of agreement, to which she declined. Then we moved on.
So, with that, coupled with the fact that there has been no other arrangement, as her and I had. I dabbled a bit, then I retired. End of story.
.... the b2b provider you're talking about. (btw, this is one reason to post under an alias--especially when you have only 1 review!) I can tell you there IS life after this woman, no matter how great she was or you think she was. I've met several providers since and had wonderful times with them. But they're different from this retired provider..... in looks, in behavior. They didn't "rattle my senses" in exactly the same way as the retired provider - but they had their own unique ways of rattling my senses, that's for damn sure!
As you said.... you're looking to replace someone - and that can't be done. Not exactly. So stop trying to replace her with someone who's the same. She's GONE. Either get over it, and look for a provider who's wonderful in her own right, albeit different, or get out of the hobby. It's not fair to other providers, as you have noted, to expect them to exactly replace this retired provider.
In general..... a hobbyist should be prepared to say "goodbye" to a provider from the moment he meets her. Providers retire, they move on. Hobbyists move on. These hobbyist/provider relationships are temporary.... with very few exceptions. So when you find a provider who "rattles your senses" as in this case, enjoy every minute of the experience and cherish each moment with her. Because tomorrow, she may be out of your life forever, and all you'll have are some sweet memories.
If so then quit trying to compare them to someone you admit is not replaceable and enjoy them for who they are and what they offer.
If not then I suggest taking a break for a while until you feel like returning.
Thanks all. I should point out that I'm not posting under an alias.
I should have mentioned that I was a perennial 'window shopper' until I saw the ad for the person in question. So it's likely I have no interest in the industry and this was a one-off. Fair enough, I was just interested to hear about the experiences of others. I think this could have been a fairly unique situation.
Yeah, maybe it's best to leave it as a sweet memory! 
Thank you all for your (positive) input.
(Edit: I have no VIP. Someone just sent me a message but I can't read it. Don't be afraid to post it here.)
-- Modified on 1/5/2014 9:41:06 PM
...and pretty bodies help dissolve the memories
but they can never be what she was (was) to (to) me-ee-ee
She's gone 
You mean... air? Minus the hydrogen and heavy gases of course.
A really nice person she was but an exceptional buzz. It's odd how I wanted to rate her 'once in a lifetime' but wasn't allowed to because she wouldn't do certain things. Vast irony at play.
It was fun to play out a fantasy which is all it was. No drudgery or personal agendas, plus the ability to take us to a dreamscape. That part of this industry I really understand and thank you girls for your incredible talents and perseverance
...perhaps, "let the nitrogen and the argon float your thoughts away" would have conveyed the same intended feeling. I couldn't help but think of this song when you described your efforts to substitute others for what you realized can't be replaced; your memory of her. Unique is just that. Never to be repeated.
It's very difficult whenever you lose someone that you're close too. I've had a lady retire that I felt close to and was able to maintain communication (with her permission) for a while but eventually she stopped responding. I've found some peace in knowing that she has just moved into a new phase of her live and is happy. I still do write to her on special occasions letting her know I'm thinking of her but not expecting a response.
My advise is to saver the memories of her while you continue you search. Don't search for the friend you lost, search for that new friend that you've yet to meet.
I need to add, get VIP on here so you can read everything it will save you time and money.
-- Modified on 1/6/2014 12:27:15 AM
Take a break and try to accept the fact that she has moved on.
Sooner or later you will get the "urge" and will find someone who might not match her, but still satisfy you.
A VIP membership will really help make a choice if/when you return.
If you are unable to achieve satisfaction after that, it might be a good idea to stop with the hobby altogether.
It will always be here if you change your mind.
Good luck
Thanks Fuzzy, you hit on a point there - I decided not to keep in contact out of respect (I could have) plus also out of the knowledge that the sessions were fantastical in nature and communication in 'civvies' could have broken the spell. Plus in the knowledge there could be factors in her life I'm unaware of so I just decided to call it quits out of respect I guess.
I did have VIP for a while... and visited other massage providers based on the information. The sessions I've had subsequently were OK, I guess it's a case of horses for courses.
P.S. 3 VIP messages now - and I can't read them
Fuzzy great advice! I'm sure the occasional email from you to her would not be seen as inappropriate.
Maybe just one where you tell her you are thinking of her and does she know of anyone you should go see.
Maybe let her know you are hoping your email finds her healthy and happy. Also tell her if she ever comes back to get in touch with you right away. Remember girlfriends have a way of mirroring each other's behavior, so maybe she knows someone, not a replacement but it could be worth it. Good luck
Maybe just one where you tell her you are thinking of her and does she know of anyone you should go see.
Maybe let her know you are hoping your email finds her healthy and happy. Also tell her if she ever comes back to get in touch with you right away. Remember girlfriends have a way of mirroring each other's behavior, so maybe she knows someone, not a replacement but it could be worth it. Good luck
thanks for the suggestion though, I'm not familiar with these waters so tough for me to navigate themThey are all unique so stop looking for an exact replacement. I had an ATF that had incall close to me, she squirted and she looked like a friend of my wife's that I had always wanted to bang. I was bummed when she retired and tried to find a replacement, no luck. The first mistake guys made is looking at the physical and assuming you can match the emotional connection. It doesn't work that way.
I did find two girls that do different things to me and connect with me in different ways. There is no use trying to compare either one to the previous lady that I used to see as they are all quite different.
My advice is play the field and forget about "replacing" the experience you had and focus on finding a new experience.
I did find two girls that do different things to me and connect with me in different ways. There is no use trying to compare either one to the previous lady that I used to see as they are all quite different.
My advice is play the field and forget about "replacing" the experience you had and focus on finding a new experience.
I absolutely concur on this reply. I found it necessary to stop seeing an ATF. As much as I liked her, I just could not take her drama. I soon found that another lady I had been seeing intermittently was quickly becoming an ATF. Different in many respects from my previous ATF. But none the less a connection was made. Sadly, she left us way too soon. The advise here is good. You can not clone or make exact comparisons.
I did find two girls that do different things to me and connect with me in different ways. There is no use trying to compare either one to the previous lady that I used to see as they are all quite different.
My advice is play the field and forget about "replacing" the experience you had and focus on finding a new experience.
The unique chemistry 2 people find together is truly irreplaceable; that does not mean other once in a lifetime connections can't be made, they will just be different, and amazing in new and exciting ways.
I do believe if the OP had a different mindset, a fresh new attitude & outlook, he would be having better experiences. If he's cycled through many ladies and hasn't had at least SOME pretty good times either he's looking in the wrong places or his expectations are truly set so high that no other lady has a chance.
What you said about guys first mistake is so right on- appearances are just that. There's so much (or lack of) more to a book than its cover...
I can't help but be very curious about what it is that this lady possesses, though. Her pussy is on a pedestal. My panties off to her!
Peace,
Astri
girl found on P411. That is if you are speaking of the girl from your review.
I do understand about losing a friendship but then you never know when the next opportunity shows up.
Any reason you cannot share who the woman was who retired and maybe some of the other women you have seen and what you did or did not like about them?
maybe share what it was about your favorite that made her so special to you.
I have posted in the past that I was "Looking for someone similar to...." and was flooded with information.
Maybe if you give us more to work with, we could suggest a winner.
Astrid! If she can't make you forget just give up!
Brabantio,
Never give up! Take a break from hobbying, and sock away the money for when you return.
And yes, I have had a few amazing experiences like you've described, over the 15 years or so that I've been hobbying. I've often found that the most interesting connections I've had to providers have arrived in non-sexual ways. For example, an actress whose stage performances I could go and enjoy before ravishing her sexually the following week. I still get a shiver just thinking of her 10 years later.
I never thought I could top that experience, but in a way I never want to. Since that time, I've had some new and wonderful provider experiences that have also made indelible impressions in my mind. More recently I saw a massage provider UTR for 5 years, seeing her progress from only allowing DIY to going to FS. That was a really fun progression, and I think we both genuinely enjoyed the process. I never had the guts to ask if she did the same for other clients, but it didn't matter. She made me feel like it was something special she shared with me. She's left the industry, and I'm happy for her. I have socked away that fun memory too, while I continue to explore the many wonderful ladies we have in the Twin Cities. While I do genuinely miss these two ATF's I've mentioned, I'm always on the hunt for the next great life experience