I agree generally and have heard the same thing from a couple visitors here and elsewhere I've traveled. I wonder if it has anything at all to do with being unwelcoming or disrespectful but instead just cause and effect?
For thought and discussion without any intention other than to understand the "why":
I wonder if it is that some of these visiting ladies want or expect advance bookings in order to actually commit to a visit? If so, I can see that creating a situation that lends itself to quite a number of cancellations, cause and effect not intentional at all. Stuff happens, the further out plans are made seems to bring Murphy to bat assuring things get screwed up! Why would someone go through the effort of contacting a lady, providing refs, only to cancel if it was not for a viable reason?
I know personally that I do not have an opportunity to hobby often in the city as I live outside of it. I either plan weeks in advance or very last minute, meaning evening before or same day which surprisingly works out more than one would expect. I've only canceled 3 appointments in 15 years but it happens and I am never happy about it. Recently I had to cancel with a visitor a week out from her expected arrival after setting something up 3 weeks prior. I told her that if the the sudden cause changed I'd be back in contact because I hated to miss her visit and I only have an opportunity a couple times per year. She notified a day later that she canceled her trip due to too many cancellations. I've also had visitors cancel on me the day before or even day of because they canceled their trip for unknown reasons.
So, if a visiting lady decides not to visit or cancel her trip because those pre-booking have to cancel, what about those that book a few day or a day out? I've always been told by ladies over the years that a good majority of appointments are scheduled two days, a day or same day. Canceling a trip in advance of arrival due to cancellations seems to eliminate any customer that would schedule under what seems to be "the norm".
I know I'd never have to cancel an appointment if: 1. I did not have an S.O. who is attentive to where I am. 2. If I never caught a cold which is very rare as it is. I hate cancellations but also understand things happen.
Peace and respect to all