This is my first post, but I’ve been a long-time lurker.  I know that the subject of my post has been debated at nauseum.  However I do have a question or two.  I have met with several providers in the past.  I initiated contact with a rather well-known and well-reviewed provider recently.  Just for the hell of it, I asked if she would do me BBFS.  At first she refused to discuss that and essentially told me where to go.  I thought oooookay……then a few days later she contacted me and said that she would do it for a larger donation.  She started to pursue ME!  Maybe hard times, who knows?  I have the emails to prove it.

My question(s) are:  How do you all feel about this and would you see a provider who does forsake safety and perpetuate specific sex talk for a price?  I know, I know…that I asked first.  My second question is…does anyone care to know who this provider is, and if it is proper to name her on this board?  I know that I will not see her, and maybe it was dumb to explore the possibility with her.

who is the lady

You might have emails to show that she consented but TER does not allow copy and paste private messages to be posted on this board. Your credibility is minimal at best because your handle is not recognizable and you don't have any reviews.

My suggestion is you get a VIP membership and let those who desire to know who this lady is PM you for more information.

Truth be told, there are lots of high end and well reviewed local ladies who offer BBFS. It is not that big a secret anymore and I don't think it surprises anyone. For those who offer BBFS, it is being offered at the lady's listed rate or even discounted. In other words, you are being taken for a ride if she is offering you BBFS for a higher rate and you accept.

In the end, you are responsible for your own safety. If a lady is willing to offer BBFS, the last thing she cares about is your health. If you are interested in BBFS, that is your choice but you are really foolish IMO to share their names with others particularly if you are going to repeat. Undoubtedly said ladies will have a fair amount of guys who want to see them for this particular service and by repeating with her your risk of contracting an STD only goes up.

I understand that my credibility is virtually zip because that was my very first post, and I am not VIP.  I do see that I have several PMs already.  I also agree and don’t think that it would be nice to out her publicly.  It would serve no real purpose.  Besides I could be a spurned client just starting gossip.

One main concern is that I’m a DATY guy.  I just wondered if anyone else is concerned about the obvious, and how that knowledge about a provider is shared.  This is something that I would certainly want to know before booking.  You were right again when you said safety is my responsibility.  That was a secondary reason for asking her.

I see that my PM count is growing.  Maybe I should invest a few dollars for VIP.  I am concerned about the community, but at the same time I didn't/don't want to destroy a provider's business and reputation.

One more reason for me to be happy I use protection... for EVERYTHING. it is TOO easy to get something with all this BBFS BS going on. That said, to each their own.

You should not "out" this provider for the following reasons:
1. YOU have no credibity on this Board, you say you have seen several providers in the past, where are your reviews?  Build some cred by reviewing, that's how it works.
2.  Why would you even suggest outing private emails.  If you were to do this, it is a breach of ettiquette that you will regret, even the threat is dead wrong.
3.  You asked for BBFS, then taunt her refusal at first, then go on to degrade her for "pursuing you" to offer BBFS.  This is being a hypocrite on your part.
4.  Why are you asking for BBFS anyway?  Want to live on the edge?  Go juggle knives!
5. As far as the safety of the community goes, each individual needs to protect their own health and safety.  You obviously can't review an email, so if you didn't see her; no review, end of  story.  Speaking for myself I would never see a provider who offered BBFS (partly because like you I love DATY), and I do ask and I think every guy has to ask.  
6.  The potential exists for your action to negatively affect her business in ways we don't even know.
By the tone of your posts it appears to me you are itching to share her name...BUT PLEASE DON'T DO IT .  I know some here will disagree with me, but I beleive that the negative to the provider (and you) cannot be outweigned by any perceived value of sharing her name.

You can be a contributing member of this community, in fact you should be, but please don't start out this way....imho


-- Modified on 7/1/2012 10:25:27 AM

Can't answer right away.  MNjohnny, you beat me up pretty good for coming on here to ask what to do.  I have another post pending in answer to HobbyCity in which I address some things that you said.  This board can be brutal.  I am not trying to hurt anybody.  I guess that you're not my friend.

If you mistook my honest assessment as brutal, I apologize.  I think the last line of my post was in fact welcoming and kind.  Your proposed action of outing this provider in my opinion could be charaterized as "brutal".  And, I don't know you so I am not your friend, but I am certainly NOT your enemy either.  Again, I tried to make my assessment frank and honest and yes, the juggling with knives analogy was a bit snarky, but not meant to be brutal.

I have been contacted by several providers of late wondering when I will be seeing them again. My take on it is that business is slow these days. If someone can't pay the bills, they might resort to extreme measures.

Reducing rates seems like a better alternative.

"This is my first post, but I’ve been a long-time lurker...........I have met with several providers in the past.  I initiated contact with a rather well-known and well-reviewed provider recently."

Then your follow up post...

"I understand that my credibility is virtually zip because that was my very first post, and I am not VIP. "

If your not a VIP or never been one, how do you know what providers to see w/o seeing the juicy details, appearance scores, performance scores, services offered,etc...?????  I am assuming (I maybe wrong though) you do your homework on the backpages, EROS, etc... finding fake ads and such but that still is not enough IMHO.

I would suggest if you have seen 2 providers in the last 3 months, write a short review on both
and get 30 days VIP so you can see all the
information in the reviews.

I disagree with mnjonny. I don't think you should out her here, but if someone PMs you, you should tell them and let them decide if they would like to see her or not. This is about public safety, and if she is partaking in these practices I think anyone that wants to know should know.

How many bare dicks have been inside her?  And where else have those dicks been?

Lie down with dogs, you gonna get fleas...

...do you believe the OP, does he have credibility?  That was the issue I addressed as #1.  A PM containing information is only as credible as the sender.  In this case based on what I have read here (and his own declaration that he has crediblity issues), I think, not credible, but hey, that's just me!   Sadly, it wouldn't be the first or last time someone's reputation has been damaged here.

Would you rather have been told "sure, go ahead and post the emails," etc?  Hard facts are hard to come by in this world because it happens behind closed doors and for obvious reasons there is nothing like a BBB to go to clear up disputes.  You have admitted yourself that you have no history here therefore no real credibility as credibility is largely built on history.  If you post the PMs, I believe you will get banned.  I'm not sure if that policy applies to emails outside TER but either way word will be spread through back channels and you'll likely end up on a blacklist.  And whose to say your emails will be accurate?  Easy enough to copy and paste and then make some selective edits to make it look the way you want it to.  And if you know enough of the history of this board, there have been handles that appeared and all they were used for was to go after a provider.  And in a credibility contest between you and a well known provider, who do you think will have the edge?  So, consider what you do carefully.

You want to out her, essentially attempting to damage her reputation for changing her mind and taking you up on your request?
How nice of you ! To each their own I guess.

Yup....based on my experirnce, roughly 1/2 the girls on BP offer bbfs while a third on Eros will. It usually comes down to the size of the donation.

Well the thread got some interesting comments.  Thanks everyone.  In summation it appears that it is a bad idea to spread the word about the subject regarding the particular provider.  Geronimo gave some insight as to why this could happen.  I took Vorlon’s comments as a warning of what could happen if I go VIP and answer the 18+ PMs.  I did ask the lady because I do have that concern if she would, and I do like DATY.  After all, how is one going to know if one doesn’t ask?  The lady shall remain anonymous.  I’m rather sorry that I brought it up.  Well….back to lurk-hood.

Thanks again everyone

Particularly if you tried to quote the emails.  If you got VIP and responded to the PMs, that is a whole other matter although I am sure some of those PMs will not be kind.

I'm not talking morality, ethics, or aesthetics. I'm talking from a purely public health point of view. Condoms are a safe and effective means of stopping VD while allowing us humans to screw around as nature intended. Condoms are wonderful. Condoms are lovely. Love them, use them.

Im surprised that one of the first responses wasnt in regards to him possibly being a troll.

My question is , how do we know this isnt just some random post to passive agressively blast a providers reputation because she possibly rubbed this guy the wrong way ?

How do we know he isnt just making this shit up ?

How do we know that he asked about BBFS and she told him to go fuck himself and this is his form of retaliation ?

We dont..

18 Private PM's ? Obviously the wolves were hungry for the fodder..

You guys are encouraging him to respond to the Private Messages with the name but not do it publicly..

I call bullshit on this post, as a few others should have.  I read this and I see someone trying to stir dissention. I see someone who looks like he is trying to damage someone's reputation.

I see someone who outted himself for liking BBFS and instead of making himself look like a douchebag for asking in the first place, he just scapegoated his own douchebaggery by point a finger somewhere else.

" Just for the hell of it I asked if she would do me BBFS... "
Yeah right

"She started to pursue me!"
A well reviewed, well know provider does not need to  chase clients, let alone newbies  I dont care how slow things are.
Well reviewed and well known providers will send out emails to check in with their regular clients, but I call bullshit that she pursued you...

" I have the emails to prove it "
forwarded emails can be doctored anything electronically sent can be doctored

Really guys? Are you buying this?
I think this guy is disguising animosity with socalled good intentions, and he just baited a bunch of people into playing along.  And now a bunch of people are chomping at the bit to know who it was..
He just delivered a double edge sword..

I for one am a HUGE safety girl, condomns condomns condomns..
But should we kid ourselves into thinking that condomns guarentee you 100% ?
I mean we are all adults here right, condomns are not the end all be all in sexual health.
Anytime you engage in sexual activity with multiple partners you are at risk, condomns just lower that risk,, But lets not kid ourselves there is still RISK.

And all of a sudden we are going to conduct a witch hunt based on some carefully placed words?
I know providers who protect themselves with all of their clients and have unprotected sex with their non-client lovers, boyfriends, partners or husbands, and are tested monthly to make sure everything has a clean bill of health.

Our clients have had unprotected sex with civie women, wives, girlfirends , do we have their sexual historys in writing to prove that they are safe? No..  

Sex is Risky Business period.

I think the OP is full of shit, how's that for diplomacy?
Thats right, I say exactly whats on my mind, and its my opinion so by all means roast me over an open fire for it.. but I own what I say.

Again if anyone wants to send some hater mail you can do so at my direct email address
[email protected] as I did not renew my VIP ..

~Cat , meow meow