I thought I had enough of tragedy when my wife passed away some 8years ago from cancer and it took forever to try to get over the grieving and get my life back in order. Then after years of avoiding relationships and turning to hobbying and making some friends here on TER, I found a wonderful girl who had the same interests and didn't have the sexual hangups that wives or girlfriends get, someone I could relate to in and out of the sack.
 So I decided to quit hobbying and got married in February and life was oh so great. And I would check in here to see how my old buddies were doing and they and even of my former providers would actually call to see how my new life was going, though I'm not naive enough to know they weren't checking on possible "business opportunities". A lot of hobbyists would still em me about experiences and I was only too glad to help.
 It was great until last Friday. My new wife was a member of a famous music group's P.R. team and was in Atlanta setting up a tour and Friday night was hit by drunk driver and passed away immediately. We buried her in her hometown Wednesday and today is basically the first day of the rest of my life without her and it really sucks. It was hard enough loving and then losing first wife after 18years, and I can't believe it's happened again, and even if we knew each other only slightly more than a year, it doesn't hurt any less and makes you wonder what you did wrong.
I am lucky that I live a sober life and have a great support group, but I can't imagine going back to work or trying to live a normal life again. I know, I've been pointed to meetings that help, but I just had to get something written down.
 TER is a strange place to expose my feelings but it's where I feel comfortable since I do know some people and we're not weird freaks just people who enjoy a different hobby.
 I don't expect tears or "hang in theres" but I just needed to vent and thanks for the opportunity. Didn't mean to be a downer, I'll be okay, still have my wonderful daughter and friends to comfort me.

-- Modified on 9/2/2010 4:58:42 PM

I also lost a girl friend to cancer, and I still miss her smile.

i am very sorry for your loss  i know what you are going through

You seem like a decent guy.  Life sucks - why do terrible things happen to decent people?

My deepest sympathies. You are in my prayers tonight.

Wow, thank you all so much! Your kindnesss and thoughtfulness truly humble me and help like you wouldn't believe.

Please accept my condolence. I can safely say, I know the pain of losing someone close as I had such experience a few years back. As you  only know time heals all wounds.  Hang in there.

Excellent post.  Very helpful to me in dealing with my loss.

Amazing that we are all going through this together.