there's an interesting thread on the san diego regional board, although the headline there is "discounts and freebies."

it discusses the phenomenon of giving/getting what i would call 'off the menu' extras.  on the sd board they were specifically discussing ladies giving their favorite clients discounts or extra time.  i'd expand it to include all perks that a lady doesn't offer in general to all clients.

i'm the very lucky recipient of such perks by some of my atf's, mainly several hours (over a lifetime of hobbying) of off the clock socializing, which goes from an extra 20 minutes or so before or after the date just chatting about our respective lives, all the way up to window shopping in beverly hills after dinner which is not counted towards the clock.  and i'm incredibly lucky in that more than one young lady has been gracious enough to allow me to donate a rate specific to me situation, below her usual asking on the rate card.  

thoughts about perks?  what makes a lady offer such?  what should a gentleman do to repay such generosity?

...and I know that they are not given to many. Rarely have I had a 1hr session actually last for just an hour- they generally go alot longer than that, and I consider it a gift from the lady that I am with.  

As a gentlewoman, I will often tip a provider that has not only given me an exceptional session but also didn't rush me out the door and chose to have me stay and visit with her. It's the least I can do (besides booking with her again).

it is nearly impossible to get them to run over the allotted time by more than five or ten minutes because of the way the bookers schedule the customers, and there is not much more you can do in five or ten minutes.  The fact that they get few days off means they are not generally inclined to spend it with a customer, but if you are seeing an ATF or CF and spending two to four hours a week with them, they will make time for an occasional off-the-clock outside date on one of their infrequent days off.  I have also received birthday and Christmas gifts from my regulars, just as I have done for them.  I have never asked for, nor received discounts, but in a way, time off the clock is a discount, too.

it's probably hard to have an answer to "what should a gentleman do to repay?"   One provider I became very good friends with and we would on occasion go catch a movie or something and toss in a session later.  Such repay just comes naturally when she hit a rough patch in her life I was there for her through the whole thing to provide emotional support along with some help on other ways.

On another occasion, which you and I discussed privately once, I hit it off nicely with a provider who is still one of my best buddies, she gave me a discount.  So I knew what one of her favorite dishes is and it happens to be one I'm good enough at fixing that I can kick any restaurant's ass.  So next time I saw her, I brought a batch of that along with a good bottle of Chardonnay and fixed dinner in her hotel.  Before I knew it, more discount and time.  

Lately we're to the point where I'm welcome to stay at her place overnight even though she does not work out of her home and has roommates that don't know what she does.  We have done over nights where I pick up the hotel and entertainment cost and all she asks is the discounted single hour rate.  Of course we are doing things we both want to do and it's planned well in advance to fit out schedules.  But she also knows she can count on me.  I have picked her up at the airport before when she needed picking up.  I have used my own training for her benefit at no charge of course.  Plus, I have helped her get through a rough period.  

This is perhaps something that doesn't happen a lot in this business.  For one thing, it requires both parties to totally trust each other and realize they will keep plans and follow through on things.  Really I guess it kind of crosses part of the escort/sugar baby boundary in a way.  Plus some of this, like staying at her place, would often require the provider to not be in any SO type relationship or there could be issues.  

So for me, I think it's just something that seems to develop naturally when the situation is right.  The issue of repaying such generosity also just develops naturally depending on what can be offered to help the provider out in life and that can be many other things besides cash.  Sometimes it's the non cash items such as semi-professional assistance based on your training that can be far more valuable in the long term than cash.  Even little things like her knowing she can depend on you to pick her up at the airport if she needs a ride can have a lot of value if she knows you will come through

END OF MESSAGE

tbh the way i repay my lady friends is repeat visits, not telling other people about our special monetary arrangements, keep their confidences, and talking them  up on the ad boards (those that are not utr).

and i guess by being a gentleman and friend, which i suppose is how i get all those "perks" in the first place.

. . .come to getting flowers from a provider is to have my rosebud licked.  Does that count?

Yeah, all of that also.  Especially repeat visits.  In fact, repeat visits are about the only way it can develop naturally.   I don't talk providers up on ad boards very often, though I know some encourage that and drop hints.  So if I feel she welcomes it and I agree with the providers quality, I do occasionally even if it is not someone I see regularly.    In some cases, it's simply the logistics of location that keeps me from seeing some more often.  But two big key words you used that are spot on correct are "gentleman and friend" and to that I would also add "trust".

"trust" is a good addition, oinge, i will keep that in mind.

i think you have hit the nail on the head desiree.  it is always on a case by case basis.

one thing i do want to stress is that a client should never start to "expect" the perks, even if already voluntarily given in a previous encounter.  it's not only a case by case basis, it's a moment to moment basis as well.

clients, like fish and company, can start to smell after staying too long.

Great topic and thread

Repeat engagements, chemistry, and mutual trust provides natural benefits.  It's a great thing.  It evolves naturally.

I have been fortunate to spend social and personal time with awesome girls during and after their hobby days.  

Friends with benefits is my elixir and personal favorite

And there you have it  Have to be friends first tho...

your website, I can only imagine how great a little appreciation from you must be!

depends with who...  
Some guys abuse my Italian hospitality...  
 Usually with my  regular guest  
I do not mind overstaying as long they do not abuse.. Lol
 
I usually give old rate to my regulars  
Or the ones That I want see again.  
It all Depends  with who... chemistry counts  
IT Happens naturally  
The  main problem Sometimes... some take our generosity for granted  or they think they are entitle

THey do not  even say  
that SIMPLE nice  "2 "WORDS  
THANK YOU ...  

BUT AM SO GLAD THAT  
Some  guy """see "and appreciate"    

very nice post  PB
 
Perks is a courtesy,  generosity but  

Not an obligation  
CC  
 
Nice post Peter


-- Modified on 1/18/2016 7:56:33 PM

On second thought I'd better not.  Let's just say I have some very great friends who I absolutely love and adore and appreciate beyond anything worth saying on TER.

Furthermore, I absolutely give extra time to regular clients, will chat and catch up with folks outside of our dates, etc. Some folks know my real name and whatnot, a select number have been over to my real house. I am always open to discussing ways I can engender authentic more long-term relationships built on trust, commitment, sexy chemistry and good communication!

-- Modified on 1/18/2016 5:05:11 PM

Some day I hope I can say thank you to you in person.

Perks are an extension of mutually earned friendship.

 

END OF MESSAGE

regulars through Wednesday.  Won't have a chance to see someone new until Thursday.  But when she comes back . . . . . .

...which you will allude to, but not state, so that readers of the post get a hint of a story you won't tell.  So why mention it at all?  Jinx, you are an International Man of Mystery...and Confusion.

Perks are an extension of mutually earned friendship."
 Perfect explanation..

U have no idea how  
Hard express myself in  other language .....  English            
English is my weak point  

LOL LO

Back when I lived elsewhere, I had several providers with whom I was friends IRL. One built and hosted the first website for my then-business, and I helped her out with a few personal issues. A few others would just call and chat, or we'd hang out when they were in the area. One regularly called me, and once called me at 2am (waking me up - fortunately I was single at the time), then drove an  hour to see me and talk about some things that were going on in her life. I offered to make her breakfast at 6, but she said she felt much better and headed home to sleep. I knew all of their real names, and where they lived, because all of them felt they could trust me, and I never gave them reason not to. It also helps to have my professional background (which both hobbyists and providers have tapped into at times), which lends itself to trust.  

I like those types of relationships, as long as its mutual and neither person is using the other....

And, having said all that, I have to find a way to see Harlowe, I think. Seems like we think alike, and would get along well.
 

Like you, my good friend BigPeterJohnson, I aim to be a thoughtful, honest gentleman, and thus I believe that definitely helps build a better relationship and trust.

I go to each lady for the first time as if I am going on a first date, hoping for a second, and I think that may be our traditional upbringing and common courtesy.

Whatever the reason, I have been the fortunate benefactor of off-the-clock dinner company, mutual exchange of birthday and Christmas presents (with my longtime regular), and more than my fair share of "Thank you so much" and "Sweet Dreams" texts. I've also had the pleasure of being entrusted to chauffeur ladies on errands, the "literal GFE" experience of shopping with a lady at such stores as Target, Victoria's Secret and Forever 21-- the latter two of which has been a bit of a win-win in aiding with the wardrobe (which she purchased). I've even brought a lady friend dinner to her long-term incall while she was working a stint and couldn't get out, so for the price of a modest meal we had a great visit while she ate.

I've also been invited into a lady's private residence, on only a second date, because she trusted me enough. While I drove the hour to her neighborhood, it saved her the public transportation commute and incall cost of seeing me, which she very much appreciated. I was able to learn more about her and appreciate her modest lifestyle, while we could engage in the comfort of her familiar surroundings. She also joined me for a modest dinner (at a place which she recommended), and much of that time was off the clock.

If we otherwise click, I'm more inclined to re-visit a lady when there's a bit more of a personal connection, and even a few minutes off-the-clock or some sort of personal interest in each other.

Bless these ladies, one and all.