I've spent the last two days emailing with six providers. With four I got as far as giving my personal info and references. Three cleared me. I also talked to one on the phone that I've seen before. But none of them seem to actually be available. The closest I've been able to get to seeing someone is an appointment for three weeks from now that she has yet to actually confirm.  

Except it's me usually wishing the guys would hurry up and confirm appointment times or just send references! I try to make the booking experience as quick and painless as possible by making my site and my contact form thorough but geeeez it's like I attract all the looky loos or something sometimes! You sound like a dream new client

I have been pretty lucky but accommodating in that department. You might get screened thru P411. A lot of providers accept that but some don't.

ahhh dont give up !!!

I've met some lovely women in this hobby and I can't think of anyone in years--even ladies I ended up not seeing after first contact--who's given me that kind of runaround.

Don't stop looking mate!  There are loads of review ladies available.  

A provider merely wishes to connect a telephone number/e-mail address  
to a currently running advertisement and receive a favorable reply/referral from said.

I apologize for the hyperbole. To be accurate I should have said "Sometimes trying to book a high end provider on a day or two notice is like trying to book a high end provider on a day or two notice."