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Legal Corner

Do not be specific
robsul2004 124 Reviews 3850 reads
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better to just use general statements like "fetish friendly" "open minded" and then let reviews do the rest.  It always amazes me how some advertise very explicit offerings - I mean if your going to do this, unless you use a very reliable verification service or get very reliable references, you are making the case very easy for LE

StrumpetofaSwan3527 reads

Hello guys and gals...

So I read the Newbie board and self-help threads and decided this question fits best here, as it deals with legality issues (I also didn't see this addressed previously, but I do apologize if I'm wrong). I suppose my question is multi-part...

My conundrum is wanting to provide specific things for which there are only a small number of other providers in my area without setting myself up for LE problems. I plan to screen, of course, and not discuss details over phone/e-mail, but I think it's important to describe offerings somewhere, esp. if they might not be the norm... wondering about activities such as pegging (strap and/or toys) or (covered) RJ's.

Would activities like these be appropriately covered under a 'FemDom' umbrella (I am also assuming my clientele might desire other submissive types of activities); would that adequately communicate what might happen behind closed doors, or should I just post a menu on a website and intend to screen heavily? Should I just go heavy on the euphemisms a la "Your ass is mine!"     (... come to think of it, that ain't bad... :D)

TIA!

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mrfisher3528 reads

So as long as you do not describe any sexual practices, go ahead and describe away.

(still not a lawyer)

-- Modified on 11/3/2010 12:31:35 PM

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RoseMallowe3607 reads

In MN it can be, and is. In MN there is no such thing as consensual assault, and if they find you giving someone a spanking, they will throw you in jail. Even if the sub swears that they wanted to be tied up and whipped, it is still assault in the eyes of the law. In the local bdsm community people have been busted.
In this state the LE lump the pro Dom/Dommes' in with the rest of us.
We are all sick and depraved, so be careful! Very careful! That is the best you can do.  

-- Modified on 11/4/2010 6:12:03 PM

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robsul20043851 reads

better to just use general statements like "fetish friendly" "open minded" and then let reviews do the rest.  It always amazes me how some advertise very explicit offerings - I mean if your going to do this, unless you use a very reliable verification service or get very reliable references, you are making the case very easy for LE

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StrumpetofaSwan3285 reads

Thank you robsul... I have seen many women advertising for specific services as well, either in ads or on a personal website, and it's been established that the disclaimer 'donation for time/companionship only' does not hold up in court, esp. if someone is simultaneously listing acronyms of what types of sexual services they provide... "Behind closed doors I like xyz..." or "this (list of hobby-isms) might happen between two consenting adults..." I agree it would be safer to work with euphemisms and legal category titles (fetish, femdom, etc.) than to out and out state specifics. I do plan on using trusted verification services as well as doing my own screening; especially as a n00b I don't want to scrimp on safety provisions.

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Ashley20103035 reads


The state that I live in, anything that causes sexual arousal and is being paid for can be construde as solicitation or L&L be it spanking, foot worship, golden showers ect ect. However the burden of proof of said arousal would still exist.

Be very careful in your wording of your ads. Before I crossed over to the dark side, I was a strictly fetish pro domme, meaning no hj, massages, fs. I was very clear that I wasn't fs. When your "submissives" contact you, you will be able to tell if they are legit or not, oh trust me you will lol.

BDSM isn't for everyone, and if you are just doing it to avoid LE eventually you will cross over to the darkside. I must warn you that with dealing with men with kinks and fetishes they may become beyond obsessed with you because many times you are the first understanding voice. Learn everything about fetishes, because there are some you don't want to touch with a 10 foot pole. Animal crush(gold fish) is just breeding ground for a sociopath.

I am approaching my first year in the buisness, and I went from being a pro domme to a light fetish friendly gfe courtesan. Many of my original clients still see me. Feel free to pm me here  or email me (link goes to my website which has my direct email) There is so much more I could tell you.

To answer your original question, when I just did bdsm and LE would call I would inform them no fs, no massages, and no happy endings they would leave me alone. You do need to set up an actual dungeon/fetish room and get a business licence to make it completely legit. Seriously get into contact with me. I did all of this, once upon a time.

Related Link: ashley's website

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StrumpetofaSwan2630 reads

^ I will indeed contact you, & thanks! :D Much appreciated.

As to my states' laws- it appears that anything touching intimate parts is illegal.

For me, not offering FS/other services is not only about legal safety but personal relationships; it's also just not something I am interested in providing. I think BDSM is immensely sensual and creative and fun and I hope to take other people to that 'higher plane' type of feeling.

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StephanieMitchell3386 reads

BDSM is legal as long as there is NO sexual contact.
Last month while doing some research on this myself, I was told by an attorney (he's really into the BDSM lifestyle) that they can give themselves a happy ending in your presence. But they advised me that if the client happens to be LE they might want to push the envelope to press charges on "self service" happy endings even if the charges are to be dropped later.

However!!!! in the State of Georgia, if you are caught inserting anything that is NOT a sexual organ into the vagina or anus of another person (even free consensual play) it carries a MANDATORY 10 year MINIMUM sentence!!!!! No joke!

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Ashley20102291 reads

Whenever I was heavily into bdsm/fetish I researched it and the only thing I could find about a domme getting into legal trouble, they got her for tax evasion, operating without a business licence, and L&L. I do know of a public dungeon locally that has been operating unscaved for years. It's all about semantics really. There were times I would not let my subs even j/o. I had a ton of men that were cross dressers and in their minds it was ok because I told them to come wearing panties. The only way I touched them was to apply lipstick. You need to avoid working out of hotels. Going to someones home puts you more under the consenting adults bdsm umbrella. Never use the phrase, "Sensual domination"

I loved doing it, but at the same time a girl needs to be romanced. There is nothing like an alpha male in all of his powerful alpha male glory behind closed doors



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RedCloak4678 reads



However!!!! in the State of Georgia, if you are caught inserting anything that is NOT a sexual organ into the vagina or anus of another person (even free consensual play) it carries a MANDATORY 10 year MINIMUM sentence!!!!! No joke!


Christ!  What happened to Southern Hospitality?   ;O

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mrfisher2007 reads

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JennaPurrLatte3254 reads

cops and masterbators do.

i wont agree to do anything other than spend time with a guy.
NOT A THING.
i wont agree to hold hands, kiss, wash a car, NOTHING.
the only thing  i agree to do is nothing

what do you do ?
nothing but i'm really good at it.

what do i get ?
60 minutes

what service do you provide ?
60 minutes of nothing

what does that include ?
everything

what's everything ?
feel free to call me whenever your purty lil head gets that all figured out.  buh bye, now.

i'm in arizona and they enforce the law aggressively here,, which if convicted, it is a 2 week mandatory minimum sentence, in tent city. (a jail made from army surplus tents on top of concrete out in the desert and surrounded by barbed wire and ran by sheriff save a ho joe)

girls here have been convicted by juries for having gfe, or greek on their websites.  
in one case a girl was arrested for saying no to greek over the phone....they booked the appointment and arrested her upon arriving at her incall because they said that by saying "no" to greek, she must've been offering regular sex but i do not know if this case went to trial and i doubt it did...

most likely she convicted herself and pled guilty. ...  because in my opinion, saying "no" to something does not constiute an agreement to do something else but if they can convince the girl that she's guilty of committing a crime, then it doesn't really matter if she actually broke the law or not.  

but honestly, regardless of the law,  i'd stick to the above script because it amuses me, and it keeps the timewasters, panty sniffing callers looking for free joy & love over the phone, and a$$hole's who think i'm nothing more than a checklist of acronyms,  from taking up too much time out of my life.

this isn't football and i really dont think its necessary to huddle up and discuss the play by play in minute detail before we even get on the field, and i think it's totally asinine to speculate about game rules before i've had the chance to properly test the capabilities and functionality, or lack thereof,  of the equipment we're going to be playing with.

the cumdaddy of all game-plays wont score any points if the ball is over-inflated and pops at the onset or under-inflated and falls flat. ...psssst

-------------------------------------

i run a site that collects and posts information from escorts and hobbyists who have been busted.
you can read the results of the surveys they submitted http://www.escortdrama.com/comments

at the bottom there is a drop-down menu "categories" which will filter the results by state, by year, or by ad website. ... since laws vary by state, you might want to check out the information submitted, if any, from your particular state.

Related Link: Drama Happens !

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