Gin or vodka ? What vermouth on not ?  I love the gin variety (which is the classic version) with Molly vermouth which is soooo hard to find.

I prefer Absolute, and yes I know there are better vodkas, but Absolute is my favorite

First, store the vodka in the freezer, it won't freeze.
Put crushed in the glass,
Pour vermouth over the ice, let it sit
Take a lemon slice, pull off the skin,
Empty the glass completely,
(It's called tossing the vermouth)
Twist the lemon peel over the glass, drop it in,
Pull the vodka over the twist, frozen vodka pours like syrup.

Enjoy

Everything you said except the vermouth, Vodka, ice, lemon peel..

Vodka:  Stoli up, very dry (no vermouth), two olives (preferably stuffed with blue cheese).  A lot of people prefer vodkas which are "smoother," like Grey Goose, but I like classic Stoli.  With its subtle peppery love-bite, you know you're drinking vodka.  Belvedere is also good.    

Gin:  When it's time for a gin martini, I like Cadenhead's Old Raj gin with Noilly Prat or Dolin vermouth, and a twist.  Failing that, Bombay Sapphire or Plymouth.  With all the different aromatics going on in the various gins, you need to pick a vermouth that matches.  If unsure, and if it's an established cocktail bar, ask the bartender for his/her recommendation.

Bombay Safire and nolly works for me

To the dirty !

What is a "dirty" martini ?

Add olive juice for dirty.  That's how I like my Goose!

There once was a hobbyist named McSweeny,
Who spilled some Gin on his weenie.
And for a little cooth...
he added Vermouth...
and slipped Tori-Blake a martini!

Your post made me think of this clip from Seth MacFarlane... Totally worth watching and only 30 seconds!

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-207_162-57567232/seth-macfarlane-serves-james-bond-a-martini-in-new-oscars-promo/

P.S. Great Pic Tori!

-- Modified on 2/3/2013 9:43:57 PM

You'll need one of those attachments on the bottle, a shot pourer. Chill the bottle, grab a towel and make arrangements with your favorite lady. It works best with clean shaven pussy.  Put the towel under her ass and have the lady pour a little vodka over the kitty and you lick it off.

Be careful, it's easy to get carried away, and difficult to gage how much you are drinking.

Don't plan on driving afterwards.  In fact, think twice about standing.

Use a small bottle.

Three Parts Gin
One Part Vodka
1/2 Part Lillet Blanc

Shake gently with crushed ice
Rub a lemon peel over the rim of a chilled classic martini glass and serve with the lemon peel as garnish.

Use good quality gin and vodka and you cannot even tell the drink has alcohol in it, until you finish your second....

I am glad others appreciate his humor.  I thought I was the only "twisted" one.

Just sayin!  Get that ice pick out of my forehead, please.

Vodka, Stolychnaya; Cinzano vermuth, just a splash;shaken; straight-up.
Prefer a cold draft beer, Bass ale.

With Katie Flowers...

Best Damn Martini I've ever had...

you know "shaken not stirred" was identify sign for Bond's enemies that he was an out of place poor class government agent trying to be sophisticated?  someone brought up in the wealthy class at that time when Flemming created the character wouldn't as for liquor to be shaken.  "shaken not stirred" is something that caught on strictly because of the movie.

Matt is correct.  Martinis were originally mixed in a pitcher and stirred.  The cocktail shaker is a mid-century invention.

1/2 tbsp Martini brand dry vermouth
5 tbsp Plymouth gin

Stir with ice until thoroughly chilled

Rinse one or two olives under running water to remove excess brine for cleaner taste.

Strain into martini glass with the olives.

It's that simple. Enjoy.

Toss out the ice, always use fresh ice when mixing drinks.

PS - No such thing as a vodka martini, perish the thought!

I really enjoy an array drinks.

I have my favorites when it comes to red wine and champagne but I have never really liked gin straight up.

I enjoy my drinks mixed with lemonaide gin or vodka.

I guess that dosent count

Hitting the poker room and then on to Martini's after 12:00 for their $5 Skyy Martinis special. Best deal going on in Las Vegas and I don't have to worry too much about getting ruffied.

Yes she has !

Here is mine, a classic martini is made with gin. My favorite gin is Bombay Sapphire , if I use vermouth it is noilly prat.

Copious amout of gin
A dash of vermouth depending on my mood
Pour into a shaker of ice and shake
It's important to shake vigorously so that a little of the ice dilutes the mixture and creates ice crystals
Pour into a chilled martini glass
Add an olive if you like. I prefer blue cheese olives
If done properly there will be ice crystals floating on top
Oh and don't forget the beautiful lady to feast your eyes on . Great for the palate and the eyes !!!!!

You know, even though its a major brand I've never had Bombay Sapphire, will have to try it. Martin Miller is another good high-end gin for martinis. Beefeater is a good everyday gin you can get from any grocery store though. Stick with London Dry Gins for martinis, I tried using New Amsterdam and it's terrible!

I bought some Noilly Prat thinking it would be great because it cost more but I wasn't all that impressed. I've grown used to the slight sweetness of Martini brand vermouth.

I don't like the ice crystals personally, which is why I only stir any more.

Hey Jetpilot2010, next time I'm in Vegas I'll buy you a drink!

April Luv in an Las Vegas Strip club.  Luckily she was wearing this tight short dress that barely covered her ass.  Her legs were long, tan, smooth, sculpted and held a pair of six inch Louboutin heels with polished red soles.  

I was tipsy, and while she dabbed up the droplets with a napkin she said it was OK, but her eyes burned a message that if I hadn't be such a good client I'd be wearing her drink accross my face.

I was clumsy, I was stupid, I was embarrassed, but I can't help it; it was hot, and I wish I could it again.

Deal heartbreaker !

I'm familiar with the shoes !

Are they great or what? And those legs go on forever.

Vodka, vermouth, an olive, shaken, not stirred, and preferably with female companionship.  

And she handled it with class and dignity! As we knew she would eom

-- Modified on 2/6/2013 1:11:47 PM

I got "punishment"